>let's turn Jurassic Park into a comedy series. >failed to turn dinosaurs into giant chickens

>let's turn Jurassic Park into a comedy series
>failed to turn dinosaurs into giant chickens
What a missed opportunity.

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  1. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    dinosaurs were always gay moron shit for gay moron babies

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Wrong.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >>he would rather indulge a fake reality than cope with the truth

        tell me youre a troony without telling me youre a troony

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          > >>
          >reddit spacing
          >ugh, söyance is real m'kay!
          Tell me you're from reddit without telling me you're from reddit

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        moronic redditer the post

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          seething feathercuck the post

  2. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    world was dogshit all the way
    kingdom had some horror moments
    haven't seen 3rd one

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >kingdom had some immensely dumb horror moments that have no place in a stupid dino movie
      ftfy

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        reminded me dino crisis and thats why i liked it a bit but still its like 6/10 at best

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >kingdom had some horror moments
      I liked when the hero was crawling away from the cartoon lava, and even though he was directly next to the lava, he didn't catch on fire because the lava has to physically touch you to make you combust.

      I also liked the dinosaur that could shrink itself to chase Claire and the nerder wherever they stood in the shot, even up the tiny pipe that was barely big enough for a human to fit through.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        It's even funnier that a dino would chase some rather small prey in a literal lava waterfall room. But all dinos in the World flicks are brainless Saturday morning cartoon monsters that roar all the time and would do literally anything to eat a human. A completely 180° from how Crichton and Spielberg wanted them to be seen in the originals.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          And yet Dominion focused on the bugs specifically because Trevorrow thought that being animals, dinosaurs would not spend all their time on the mainland destroying cities like a Dinosaurs Attack card.

          • 3 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            You mean the guy that made raptors chase a motorcycle through the streets and roofs of Venice?

            • 3 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              You mean the last gasp of the "We've trained raptors to be military attack dogs" subplot?

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                yes, that mega moronic shit.

                You know who's better than raptors in every way? Tigers. Why don't we have military tigers?

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Tigers can count and work door handles?

              • 3 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Yes. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JYFIV5NV7m4

                Also, what's the point of 'count' or any intellect if the whole point is that they become mindless drones that are navigated by a laser pointer? You know what's better than a raptor as a killing weapon? A tiger. Where are military tigers.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Yeah, I almost shut it off at that part.
          >evilsaurus gets lava dripped on its head
          >this doesn't cause it to run away, it just roars some more and continues to chase the humans

  3. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Fallen Kino is great. Finally doing something interesting with these dinos.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      In the "so bad it's good" way? Kinda yeah, it's so monumentally terrible it's a fun cringe watch with friends.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        This and also adds cool idea with blowing that fricking island to hell.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          It's okay, they already announced Jurassic World 4. They cloned Dennis Nedry, now it's a Nedry Park, run away or he'll eat you.

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >This and also adds cool idea with blowing that fricking island to hell.
          Kinda weird that they made such a big deal about that island when there are four other islands with dinos on them, as stated in JP2.

  4. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >indooraptor
    >goes outdoor
    >dies

  5. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    remake when?

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Chicken World

  6. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    How do you respond without sounding mad?

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      But everybody knows dinos loved Jesus and let him ride on them.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Jesus Raptor confirms.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Is Raptor Jesus a joke to you?

  7. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    BIG

  8. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    FEATHERED

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      LIE

  9. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    So will it be revealed in Jurassic World 4 that these films are now part of the Monsterverse?

  10. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    ayo hol up

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      so yo be sayun

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        we wuz birds n sheit

  11. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    SHIEEEEET

  12. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    They should've made Bryce Dallas Howard get accidently injected with dino DNA in the second movie where she becomes the antagonist of the film as a 200 ft man eating giantess. she becomes queen of the dinosaurs and it's up to Chris Pratt's character to stop her. He goes out into the jungle with a spec ops team to hunt her down and tranquilize, but one by one they are hunted down devoured and crushed by her and her dinos. Idk what the third movie would be.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I just want porn with Bryce Dallas Howard.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I wanna see her swallow a live goldfish whole for a role in a movie.

  13. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Dino bawds

  14. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Jurassic Park
    My favourite movie. Near flawless.

    >Lost World
    Good movie. Has problems. Biased because of the first one. Loved it anyway.

    >JP3
    Bad movie. Has a lot of problems. Biased because of the first one. Enjoyed it the first time. Was unsure the second time. Was disappointed the third time. The Spinosaurus was decent. The set pieces were cool. The actors were good. The plot just wasn't substantial and it was underwhelming by the last act.

    >World
    Initially placed this above JP3 and just a bit under the lost world. But after rewatching it, and after careful consideration, I've decided not to endorse Jurassic World at all. What little it does which is distinct from JP is nonsense - only clever thing is the meta commentary - but it smacks of hypocrisy. I liked looking at Bryce Dallas Howard. I liked the fight against Indominus at the end. I liked Pajeet Hammond. But the raptor plot was moronic. The high heels were moronic. The teenage boys never felt in danger and their family oriented plot was lame, they were boring. The comedy cheapened the film. I took it way less seriously than JP3, which is nuts considering the scenes of raptors talking (both in a dream and literally).

    >Fallen Kingdom
    I enjoyed the opening sequence, however, just after it ended I concluded the movie was going to be garbage. It immediately made no sense, the operation to get the Indominus DNA was completely moronic and implied there was no backup samples of that dinosaur - anywhere at all. Pure spectacle over substance. Immediately worse than JPIII. Film continued to devolve into shlock. The little girl. The dinosaur rights activist. The nerdy slapstick mulatto (who was surprisingly good in D&D but not in this shit). The le evil hunter. The volcano sequence. The sleeping rex scene. The mansion auction. The clone schmoltz releasing of the dinosaurs. The 'this changes the world' bullshit. Horse crap.

    >Dominion
    Didn't watch because I'm fricking done.

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