Literally no one cares that this is coming out lol
Not a single person
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Literally no one cares that this is coming out lol. Not a single person
I care
solely so I can see how badly it bombs at the box office
Because it sounds that crap that there’s no way they greenlit it
>KK made $20 million bonus
How embarassing, I think a passing bird shat on her forehead.
It's the lobotomy scar
anyone going to see this movie will be needing a lobotomy after.
Hahahahaha. Hollywood is dead.
bag that bow wow face
Eventually they'll learn that they have no idea what audiences want now. The people who generate buzz in their vapid elite circles (Ezra Klein, Phoebe Waller Bridge, Brie Larson) have absolutely no box office draw for mainstream audiences. They're not even gold enough performers to justify using them
If they haven't figured it out at the end of this year, they never will.
>Eventually they'll learn that they have no idea what audiences want now.
They'll probably go into total panic mode, and we're probably gonna see some major studios collapse or downsize. There was a point like 2017 when it was like "wow that was the biggest bomb ever. What an anomoly!" but it seems like we're getting 200 million negative films every other week and it's completley unsustainable.
>The people who generate buzz in their vapid elite circles (Ezra Klein, Phoebe Waller Bridge, Brie Larson) have absolutely no box office draw for mainstream audiences.
Fleabag has an amazon Tomb Raider series setup, which I'm sure that they thought they were geniuses to do. She's gonna be the new indy, so we'll swoop in and steal her for Tomb Raider, which is just fem-indy right? I'm sure some exec gave himself a nice 5 million dollar bonus for that and patted himself on the back. Of course no one knows who the fug this forehead stain is, and no one cares. She and every one of these idiots will be paid millions, jump around streaming shows no one watches, and cash out with millions.
We probably have the stupidest system now: shitty stars no one cares about who are still paid millions. Ford himself was likely paid at least 20 million for Indy 5, likely as high as 40 mil.
If they're that desperate, would it really be so hard to find a body builder who can be this generation's Arnold Schwarzenegger, and just make some good action, and sci-fi/fantasy genre movies?
They could literally just do that at any point. And they're not so dumb that they don't know what people want. It's about stubbornness, and trying to force audiences to like what they think they should like.
>If they're that desperate, would it really be so hard to find a body builder who can be this generation's Arnold Schwarzenegger, and just make some good action, and sci-fi/fantasy genre movies?
First, someone with that charisma and physique is rare. Arnold had a background in business so he wasn't just some meat-head and they've been trying since 1984 to find the New Arnold. Second, The Rock is the closest equivalent and he has just gotten too old and movies are bombing.
Third, most importantly, look at the majority of Arnies films. Most had 30-60 million dollar budgets with today's money. The mid-budget action film is ust not made anymore. Ergo, they need bigger budgets but that means dumbing it down and they need to draw in women and shit skins. Not happening.
>The Rock is the closest equivalent and he has just gotten too old and movies are bombing.
Sure, but like The Rock was a 90's icon. There are young wrestlers now, right? I don't follow wrestling, but that whole world never goes away.
>The mid-budget action film is just not made anymore
They should probably make some.
>They should probably make some.
I suspect there's gonna be a big shift once they can react to this. I think the mega 200+ blockbuster is just dead. Films should be in the 15-60 mil range on average, with a "blockbuster" costing 100 million. Like for the love of god Universal spent 100 million on Super Mario Bros, and another 100 million on Puss n Boots 2 and both ended up being profitable. Pixar-disney thinks every film they shit out needs to cost at least 200 million for some unknown reason and these films need insane numbers like 560 to just start to make money.
I think studios just need to be broken up because they're too big, too cautious, and too stupid. Smaller studios will take more risks, make some 10 million dollar film that really wows people.
>There are young wrestlers now, right? I don't follow wrestling, but that whole world never goes away.
Yes there are young wrestlers, but none of them have even 1/10th of Rock's charisma. They tried with Bautista, but he never broke past the mid-level roles. I suspect they'll try with the Rock's nephew, Roman Reigns, but his acting skills and charisma are practically non-existant.
As someone not into wrestling at all but have been forced to sit through some pay per view WWE specials I can safely say that the only one with the stage presence to pull off acting right now is Cody Rhodes but only if he burns off that horrendous neck tattoo.
A few of the others could probably handle heavily-comedic action roles but that's about it as far as i've seen.
Zoomers do NOT watch movies. They don't even really play videogames. Only a minority of them do. Most of them unironically spend all their time on social media and care about influencers or whatever. The entire film industry is geared towards millenial kidults now. Even the toy industry in its current state is reported to get as much as one fourth of its income from adults. Once zoomers grow up to become the dominant consumer group cinema will be as dead an artform as theatre or painting.
Okay, but even then, make movies people actually like, so that the people who are watching movies still want to watch them.
What's so hard about masculine power fantasy +cool shit on screen + attractive women?
I could plot out the bare bones of a movie like that in five minutes.
>What's so hard about masculine power fantasy +cool shit on screen + attractive women?
Women now run everything and feminism is the dominant ideology. Toxic Masculinity is something they rail hard against. Does any of this have anything to do with making money? Nope, because they've become divorced from what audience WANT but instead put out what they think audiences SHOULD watch instead according to their ideals. Idiot ideological true believers are now in charge.
If you question this the lesbians don't promote or hire you. You get shamed on twitter. Someone reports inappropriate comments or gestures and you get fired. The whole system is designed to benefit feminists now.
That's probably boring but correct. Indy dies in the past and is laid to rest in a tomb, the end? I guess that could work. Marion out of nowhere seems odd when she'd work much better at the beginning of the movie. And Fleabag would work better as the new indy if Indy died.
But why not make Fleabag an archeologist also working under indy as his student?
>But why not make Fleabag an archeologist also working under indy as his student?
It's called capitalism.
>And Fleabag would work better as the new indy if Indy died.
>But why not make Fleabag an archeologist also working under indy as his student?
no no no no no god no
her whole motivation to find artifacts including dial of destinity is so she can sell them for whoever pays more. as opposed to indys 'that belongs in museum' agenda
I KNOW what they are thinking - they are wanting to make her "bad ass". Some crime lord cigar smoking lady is their image of "tough" and "cool". All the kids will want to see more Fleabag! This little twig girl is some adventurer? Come on.
But given her background, why not just cash out, run some shitty mafia to launder money in the third world and retire? Indy has a passion for finding ancient relics thought to be myths since he genuinely cares about this shit. The first film has a character arc (simple, but seemingly forgotten by hollywood) where he doesn't believe in mythology and the supernatural, to be proven wrong and he has to use his wits to react to the new situation. Specifically uses his knowledge of the bible to shield his eyes from looking at the Ark.
The conflict in these new Lucas Films is the woman (Rey or Fleabag) is perfect and the men around her have to realize how perfect she is and just let her do everything. Clearly some feminist power fantasy.
>The conflict in these new Lucas Films is the woman (Rey or Fleabag) is perfect and the men around her have to realize how perfect she is and just let her do everything
That's not just Lucas, that's every character arc for every woman in media since 2015. They know they can't show women struggle with men, because it will show that men are strong, and that's bad. They know they can't show women struggle with other women, because that shows women being catty, and that's bad. The only struggle they can show is women struggling with themselves, and not because they're weak (because that's bad), so the only possible struggle left is that they're TOO STRONG and just need to REALIZE IT. It's the razor's edge of acceptable female character arcs and it's fricking boring.
The message is clear that if ONLY the stupid men around them would get out of the way, these women would shine and fix everything. It's clearly how a narccisitic woman who overvalues herself thinks, like say a hollywood producer who greenlights all this shit. KK does seem to have a thing for these pretty but not too pretty Anglo women as leads right? Likely her self-inserts.
>but she's Irish
And she clearly fantasizes about being upper class british. Fleabag is someone she likely envies.
General Gender Studies is the same, but the purple hair is too on the nose. I remember some commentator on here saying that the scenes with her was too painful since he's worked in Cali and there's upper management ladies like that all over. Insta wine aunts who think they're hidden geniuses.
It's a character arc for female centric media in general. Look at Beauty and the Beast. Same thing. She's perfect, there are a bunch of loud aggressive men around her, and they need to learn to appreciate her better (or die).
There's certainly something to be said here about the not so subtle privileges of the female experience, vs the male experience which is basically a long series of challenges where the world slams the door in your face and tells you to self improve or die on your ass.
the female hero's journey is meant to be about establishing yourself securely in society, hence the focus on marrying Mr Right (even though it isn't mandatory, see Titanic and Gone With The Wind). doesn't work in an adventure setting and isn't even really suited to movies, because you need to introduce a shitload of characters for Little Miss Important to play off of.
look at how much of an easier time HBO and Netflix show have making female characters work while movies constantly fail at it.
Woman don't want to be action heroes, the best you can aim for is some bratty side kick that complements the hero but never outshines him. Females are comfortable on that position for frick sake just give them what they want.
it can work, but the best scenes still wind up being related to shipping or social conflict.
>There's certainly something to be said here about the not so subtle privileges of the female experience, vs the male experience which is basically a long series of challenges where the world slams the door in your face and tells you to self improve or die on your ass.
Men have higher to climb but lower to fall. Women just have to not frick up in order to be comfortable, men are climbing the mountain to reach the peak where 80% of them fall to their deaths but 20% each lunch on the summit.
>But why not make Fleabag an archeologist also working under indy as his student?
1) she needed to be a strong female character who don't need no man
2) if she's not just some student it allows for shitty plot twists where she betrays him only doesn't, just like Ray Winstone in Crystal Skull, remember how cool his character was?
>And they're not so dumb that they don't know what people want.
Hollywood is now controlled by angry lesbians. There is a war inside too.
I forgot about this. Pratt with a beautiful love interest would have made a billie.
It's never too late
>290 million budget on a movie starring pheobe waller bridge
is hollywood run by idiots?
It's all money laundering and taking orders from the government. What audiences want is the last thing on their mind.
It may be kino
why would you say that? What the hell is wrong with you?
The audience is numb to the shitty cash grab soft reboot. They cant even generate buzz from hate anymore.
The fact of the matter is that outside of boys who were aged 7-12 in 1983, nobody ever gave that much of a frick about Indiana Jones. Especially when you revive this 40 year old character (played by a 90 year old Harrison Ford) just so he can get one last punch one last Nazi before the 2024 election.
The originals were those kinds of movies you would always be happy to catch on TV throughout the 90's and 00's.
I don't know if kids even care now. Do kids even watch movies anymore?
Adults haven't cared since the fourth one sullied the brand, and are basically full up on unnecessary sequels in general at this point, after all of the Star Wars, and Star Trek, and Terminator, and Pirates of the Caribbean, and Lord of the Rings.
There really is no one to be excited for this, except I guess spiteful feminists who want to ruin things men like, and rub it in their faces, and I think even those people are basically dying as a cultural movement, since the based trannies shoved it back in their faces.
This. The movie relies on an older audience to come back, one that has largely been derided and mocked by Disney. At this point I have no faith in any Disney product. The only way it could have been successful is if they somehow did the character justice, like a Top Gun Maverick, that would lead to positive word of mouth. But no. Old Indy is not only a sad old, he’s also divorced, and his only son died in Vietnam. He’s then coerced into one last adventure by this new woman (who by most accounts seems unlikeable) that chastises him for his globetrotting adventures since they were culturally insensitive. What grown man wants to watch Indy get talked down to for taking artifacts and putting them in a museum?
Spielberg and Lucas already knew this would be a problem with Crystal Skull which is why Mutt was in it so teenage boys could watch it with their dads and bond or whatever. I seriously cannot figure out who the target audience for this one is. From a purely capitalist perspective it doesnt even appeal to the lowest common denominator. Women in their thirties? It doesnt even have a cute baby Yoda thing in it to sell plushies like every other goymslop targeted towards women. Even Crystal had those desert rats and monkeys in presumably for that reason.
>I seriously cannot figure out who the target audience for this one is
Modern audiences.
>Disney Indy
frick off, literally any other studio would be better
the only thing i care about is the moronation of airplanes going back in time and getting shot down by ancient romans, and i can easily get my keks for that from a camrip the day after it goes to theaters
it's amazing to me that someone read this and said "yes, this is a good idea for the climax of an Indiana Jones movie". presumably several people.
The most interesting part of the film is trying to reverse engineer and figure out where the new ending starts and what was changed. My full suspicion is that the last 20 minutes or so are entirely new and reshoots. Mads quickly dying off screen is too sudden and anti-climatic. Marion and Sallah showing up feels like too many wrote down that they wanted to see them in post-screening feedback cards. It leads me to believe the time erasure plotline was genuine. It would have at least been a tiny bit more interesting use of time travel.
theres probably more than that. there were concept arts of advanced alternative nazi engineering showing die glocke and haunebu flying saurcers. maybe they wanted to pull bttf2 thing with alternate history where nazi rule the world but then cut it out completely?
Marion and Indy ending up together instead of Indy dying is the only big change, the final act was always the same. if Mads dies abruptly its probably because the producers didn't understand how central the hero/villain conflict is to these movies -- hence them thinking a moronic time travel scenario was going to work.
nothing really makes sense from the perspective of this being an indiana jones movie, so i guess it's just par for the course. shit, even the other ones have some things that make sense associated with the artifacts they're supposed to be searching for
>ark of the covenant contains the spirit of God, which is too much for people to handle seeing and makes them explode
>sankara stones are magic pajeet rocks meant to combat evil so it made sense that an evil guy would want them for himself
>holy grail actually does grant eternal life, but has strict movement restrictions
>crystal skulls have some ayylmao mythos surrounding them so i guess that's just what they are also here's a spaceship
>dial of destiny is the antikythera mechanism, which is basically astronomical calendar based on the position of celestial bodies, and somehow this means it's a fricking TIME MACHINE
In other thread anons said that Dial isn't time machine itself, it just calculates where time distillation wormholes appear and apparently they are natural creations people have no control over them. Nazi guy miscalculates and instead of getting back to 1939 to assist Germans with his rocket technology he goes to anceint era Greece where his plane crashes and he dies.
Crystall Skull was a shit movie but at least the artifacts are really a thing from mesoamerica. this is just making stuff up.
I bet originally it wasn't even Archimedes who invented the Dial, it would have made more sense being Leonardo Da Vinci but someone decided Renaissance Italy wasn't remote enough in history.
>Crystall Skull was a shit movie but at least the artifacts are really a thing from mesoamerica. this is just making stuff up.
This.
>I bet originally it wasn't even Archimedes who invented the Dial, it would have made more sense being Leonardo Da Vinci but someone decided Renaissance Italy wasn't remote enough in history.
Mechanism is dated 200BC and while it's not clear it's Archimedes creation, he's much more probable creator than Leo who lived 1800 years later.
Da Vinci lived from 1452 through 1519, which is less than 1800 years from the ASSUMED age of the mechanism, and nothing in any f his surviving works can show even the slightest possibility that he could design and build something that complex.
my bad i didnt check dates assumed its 1800 years when its 1700 between Leo and the mechanism
my point stands still, mechanism is not confirmed by Archimedes but still dating back to his times so he is the most possible creator but its only assumption. nobody can confirm this.
Crystal Skull is nowhere as bad as people say
>I bet originally it wasn't even Archimedes who invented the Dial
With watches we have the evolution from a single-hand watch, to a two-hand watch, to modern complicated movements.
The Antikythera Mechanism exists in a total creative vacuum. There's absolute zero lineage from simple machine to the most complex mechanical device from over 2000 years ago. It shows no inventer building something simple, then evolving his work into something complex. It just exists.
Some writings claimed Archimedes made two such devices, which is how it's associated to him, but there's no proof that the Antikythera Mechanism is one of those nor is there any proof that Archimedes was able to produce anything that complex. It's literally an assumption. In fact its very assumed age stems from the assumption that it was made when Archimedes was alive when factually-speaking we don't know if it's correct.
So it's entirely possible that Archimedes did NOT make it, especialy since it was found in Greece and not Syracuse Rome where Archimedes lived and died.
>Alienate old fans with woke shit and geriatric Indy
>Zoomers don’t give a shit about Indy and geriatric Harrison Ford
Literally who was this made for?
That's because the word has gotten out that it's Fleabag's movie that onyl drags Indy along so she can use his brand recognition to sell it, and Indiana Jones himself ends as an undignified old man who got his ass kicked by a woman who knows what's best better than he does because "women are better"
Even normies who don't watch movies like my family aren't fans of modern groomer Disney. My mom loved indiana jones because it came out during her formative years and she told me "did you see there's a new Indy coming out? They're going to ruin it" she told me and we laughed and I told her how I've heard they demasculate him in the movie and the girl who is a snobby feminist is the real lead of the movie
Disney destroyed the sense of quality and trust the movie-ging audience had with it for decades. That's their biggest loss that they won't easily recover from. And the thing is they don't want to recover back to their successful days while sitting there and telling themselves "WHY WOULD WE MAKE MOVIES THAT PANDER TO WHITE SUPREMACIST TRUMP-LOVING HITLERS?"
Don't you get it? Disney doesn't care about the old white boomers who grew up with these franchises. Their new target audience is the purple haired college girls and soi men who are into identity politics and leftism. They couldn't care less about their old fans, nor could they care any any young fans who share those boomer beliefs, and that point has been driven home for years now
Does Mutt just stay dead at the end of the movie? And the bratty israeliteess becomes his new protégé? If so that is kind of fricked up
They kill Mutt off in Vietman off-screen to force the situation to where Indy's only "family" is his "god-daughter" Fleabag. It's cunning manipulative writing to eliminate Indy's true heir to force Fleabag into being his only heir.
jesus fricking christ
Georgebros how are we coping?
By not giving the mouse any money for this piece of trash?
This is 100% Lucas’ fault. He chose to sold it to Disney (after distrusting the studio system his whole career), and he chose to cede control and not put in any clauses mandating certain creative decisions. The ungrateful whiny frick who made all the money in the world should have grown a thicker skin instead of throwing a tantrum because 100% of the audience didn’t love everything he made.
>Indy's true heir
he doesn't have one and even if he had, Shia LeBouf definitely wasn't it.
>Spotted Phoebe Waller-Bridge
So his own son isn't it? Right.
>oldschool style poster
>actual movie is green screen / cg slop
dishonest
why is indy in an inert stance in this poster? to complete the triangle of circles that point to the female for female prominence points redeemable at the BlackRock orgy under the theme park.
>Indysassy Jones and the Finger Clicking Zingers