Luke, did I ever tell you about the time when your father was snapping peoples necks left and right just to get to me? He was a good friend.

Luke, did I ever tell you about the time when your father was snapping peoples necks left and right just to get to me? He was a good friend.

  1. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    That scene would look good with Mambo #5 playing in the background

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Jump up and down

      and move it all around!

      Shake your head to the sound

      Put your hands on the ground!

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      >A little bit of Monica in my life
      >A little bit of Erica by my side
      >A little bit of Rita is all I need
      >A little bit of Tina is what I see
      >A little bit of Sandra in the sun
      >A little bit of Mary all night long
      >A little bit of Jessica, here I am
      >A little bit of you makes me your man

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        >a little bit of you makes me your good friend

  2. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >This is a presence I haven't felt for a week

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      lmao

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      lol

  3. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    ROFL

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      It really isn't that fucking funny man. Calm down. Save your caps for something worth while. You're just giving it away for fucks sake. Have some standards.

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        ROFLMAO!!

        • 4 months ago
          Anonymous

          Thank you. I know my comment (post; for the inept) deserved the very best.

  4. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    I AM WHAT YOU MADE ME

  5. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >A young Jedi named Darth Vader, who was a pupil of mine until he turned to evil, helped the Empire hunt down and destroy the Jedi Knights. He betrayed and murdered your father.
    >He also dragged me through a goddamn wall of fire and it hurt really bad. I didn't receive any permanent scaring, of course. Space fire is a lot colder than real fire, Luke.
    >And he was a good friend

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Its like a remix but for a movie.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      >>And he was a good friend
      It's a great line.
      I mean, that's not what Obi Wan says about Darth Vader. He's talking about Anakin. I'm almost always in tears when Obi Wan talks about Anakin. Remembering him and everything they went through and how many times Anakin bailed him out and probably saved his life - he says he was a good friend. Until Darth Vader killed him. Darth Vader was not such a good friend.

  6. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >Luke, when next you face your father, I suggest you exploit his very clearly poor memory.
    >when we met he for some reason thought that he hadn’t seen me since we fought on Mustafar, but we had very memorable encounters he really ought to have alluded to
    >he even seemed to forget he hadn’t been my apprentice for years, but that’s another matter entirely
    >I really hope he doesn’t have space Alzheimer’s, since that would be really horrible
    >and he was a good friend

  7. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    *picture of old obiwan

    >Have I ever told you the story of Kathleen Kennedy?

    >She was a dumb cunt who got raped to death by a pack of Jawas

  8. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >Luke, judging by the calm and casual way your father and I speak to each other it may seem like we merely had a civil disagreement and parted ways years ago, but actually I sliced his fucking limbs off and rolled him into a lake of lava as he screamed about his hatred of me and then there were several occasions where we tried desperately to fucking obliterate each other over the subsequent decades. He was a good friend.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      0/10 you're implying too much. Vader isn't Luke's father yet and Obi-Wan is literally talking about the destruction of his race in the same breath, of course it was fucking do or die type shit.

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        >LUKE! That meme was 0/10 you're implying too much. Vader isn't your father yet and i am literally talking about the destruction of his race in the same breath, of course it was fucking do or die type shit.

        • 4 months ago
          Anonymous

          >U-uncle Ben are you feeling alright?

          • 4 months ago
            Anonymous

            >Luke, have I ever told you about Lysergic acid?

            • 4 months ago
              Anonymous

              >Now Luke explain to me again how you are made out of wood?

      • 4 months ago
        Anonymous

        lmao prequelzoomie mad

  9. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >Luke, did I ever tell you about the time your father and his subordinates mercilessly murdered hundreds, potentially even thousands Luke, just to get to me. I was a coward Luke, did I not tell you about that? Also your father? He was a good friend.

  10. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    he aged a lot in next 10 years, goes like 40 to 60

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      >he doesn't know about the mineral Vader lit
      it wasn't a coal, it was a Silicax Oldalate

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Tatooine's sand is very coarse indeed.

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      stress and regret

  11. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >Luke did I ever tell you about how I was a redditor who hated racism but loved cheating on his wife? I even pretended to like Star Wars and the prequels!
    >She was a good friend

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      >Luke did I ever tell you how I went to reddit and never came back? I'm a good friend, Luke.

  12. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >He did nothing but sulk and argue with me the whole time I knew him, before he betrayed our order and civilization by slaughtering children and murdering innocent people in cold blood, and one of the last times I saw him was as he lay at my feet, limbs amputated, body on fire, screaming about how much he hates me. And he was a good friend.

  13. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Luke, did I tell you how I met your little sister and used mind control to seduce her?
    She was a good friend.

  14. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >Luke did I ever tell you about your father, who I left to be roasted alive by lava because he was a scumbag who murdered children?

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      >Luke did I ever tell you your father burned me back too which is why I look like I aged? Because the writers want to take the worst aspects of this fucking story and setting and turn it into plot points?

  15. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Luke, did I ever tell you...? Oh, what the fuck have I ever told you? I don't even remember what I said anymore. What, Jedi? Yeah, yeah, I'm a great Jedi. Living in this forgotten scum hole. Luke, there's a reason your uncle says you're an idiot.

  16. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >Luke, did I ever tell you about the time I fought my old rival, Darth Maul? It was actually just down the road a bit, believe it or not. I was sitting by my campfire and he tried to bum rush my ass like the moron he was. I made quick work of him though. His awesome double-sided light saber was cool, but no match as I impaled in ass in under 5 seconds. It was fucking ridiculous. And he was a good friend.

  17. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >Luke, did I ever tell you about the time I constantly ran away from battle and got saved by random women. It was during the phase of my life when I was led around by a 10 year old girl. I must have seen thousands of innocent people die while I hid like a bitch. They were good friends.

  18. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Luke, did I ever tell you about the time your father tossed me around like rag doll, using the force? And then he told a stormtrooper to 'Bring him to me."?? Anyway, I just thought that last part was funny. He was a good friend.

  19. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >Luke did I ever tell you about the time I abbandoned my family for a PUTA? She was a good friend

    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      Lol

  20. 4 months ago
    Anonymous
    • 4 months ago
      Anonymous

      lmao

  21. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    Luke, did I ever tell you of Max Rebo? He was a male Ortolan from Orto and a popular Jizz-wailer musician who led the Max Rebo Band. He mainly played the red ball jett organ, which he played with his feet; he and his band often performed for criminals and gangsters. I must say, that bro has been on my mind. No cap, I been thinking about that time when I barebacked him raw in Jabba's Palace. That shit had to be the tightest, bluest, wettest elephant alien boy pussy I've ever laid pipe into. I swear to the Midi-chlorians, the most heavenly high is gargling that wonderboy's nuts while going fist deep into his shitter. I had Max Rebo screaming in the sheets with head too ridiculous to ignore. That bro frotted my cock until he busted on my mouth, I had to return the favor. That bro Max Rebo and I been fucking non-stop ever since, but keep that shit on the DL. He does that shit for free. If you're gonna ask me how to "long" Max Rebo, I'll be deadass. All you gotta do is ask, be straight up, and get physical real quick. Touch his nuts, get on ya knees, talk your shit. He doesn't play around with no pansy-ass bros either. He likes his men manly, and his dick thick. Dark skin, 6'5 is the minimum and I ain't talking about height boy. That bro Max Rebo stole my heart and drank my seed. And... he was a good friend.

  22. 4 months ago
    Anonymous

    >Knocks on door
    It's jello time mr. Kenobi. Are you having fun with your space wizard rp? That's nice. Remember, bingo is tonight at 5:00 in the common room.

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