>movie for zoomers
>runtime exceeds zoomers' attention span by 2 hours, 59 minutes
BRAVO SCOTT
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>movie for zoomers. >runtime exceeds zoomers' attention span by 2 hours, 59 minutes
Why are movies so bloody long now? Everything is 3 hours or close to it in length when almost none of them justify their runtime. I thought The Batman was bad when it was an hour overlong but now the fricking FNAF movie is twice as long as it needs to be.
they at least used to put 10 minute intermissions about halfway into it, it used to be maybe one film out of 10 that did that ,now it's about all of them
I don’t get why either. I could watch Nightmare Before Christmas at any given time because it’s an hour long but unless I see these latest flicks at the movies I usually won’t watch them.
Studios can reap a bajillion dollars rereleasing streamlined cuts of their garbage. Give me a 90 minute cut of the latest Fast and the Furious. Drop a few dollars off the ticket price, you could remine the last 10 years of goyslop and not have to make anything new. Pure profit. Do this hollyjew, it's in everybody's best interest.
Lean in to it. Call them Zoomcuts. I'm not sure about the next idea, cgi altering everyone's hair to be the broccoli cut, so add or don't add that if you like.
the big blockbusters of the year have always been around 3 hours.
Big epic blockbusters like LOTR or Avatar sure but now simple action and horror movies are nearing 3 hours too which has never been the norm.
No one gives a frick about movies anymore, and that includes the editors.
there's less and less movies being released in theaters now
movie theaters have to maximize profit from popcorn and the coke
yeah took a while for the one obvious answer...
LOTR and titanic had intermissions. and even with the massive popularity/quality of those films people b***hed about the length
now that there's an assumption people are watching on their couches all bets are off
When I was a kid in the 90’s it was an unspoken rule that movies over 2 hours long were for grownups and won Oscars, and movies under 2 hours long were action movies and comedies made for pure entertainment. I think current Hollywood is so self absorbed they believe everything they make is important so they make all movies over 2 hours long. I miss the 90 minute movies.
there's probably 3 hours worth of footage filmed and will be edited down to an hour and a half
It's already got an MPAA rating do I doubt they'll be editing it down much more.
Frick, its gonna be PG-13.
>tfw no Baby using the scooper then walking out in a skin suit scene
People are terrified to give criticism. Combined with forced diversity efforts, questioning a token hire on any film element can be career suicide. Its even worst for established filmmakers, who are thought of as Gods by the film community at large. Just look at Scorsese's unnecessarily long The Irishman: clearly the de-aged scenes look terrible but good luck trying to second guess Marty, the legendary auteur.
Holy shit
Dropped
You don't need 3 hours to say something, at that point, just release a book, oh wait, there already is a book series nobody read
Frick FNaF
i pretty much only watch movies with my kids these days and anything over 90 minutes is unacceptable
sonic 2 is way too long for a kids movie for example
Why don't you just watch it in several parts?
that’s not how movies are supposed to be watched
Zoomers aren't old enough to watch this.
I’m twenty one
>2002 was 40 years ago
I'm almost 40.
its gonna be chock full of epic lore tho
Even if it was 90 minutes long, zoomers would still spend 40% of that time on their phones at best. Then afterward spend 3 hours watching some israelitetuber talk about the movie and base their entire opinion on what that israelitetuber said.
Youre speaking from experience arent you zoomanon
You can't make this work beyond 80 minutes. I assume the creator was a fricking autist and demmaneded an epic runtime to give the rights, he had being letting off too many offers that ended with studios making 2 different movies rip-offs of this topic in return (The Banana Splits one and that other with Nicolas cage)
I remember when FNAF was fricking based, now it's just shit for kids.
when was that? 2014?
You misunderstood the target audience, zoomer autists will watch hours upon hours of FNAF lore & fan animations.
>directed by woman
aaaand dropped
a lot of Cinemaphile's favorite movies are written and directed by women...
Which one besides American Psycho, which was adapted from a book written by a man?
The Warriors
Not a good movie.
Uh, OK? The original post said to cite movies based on books written by men that Cinemaphile likes, moron. Cinemaphile widely likes The Warriors
American Psycho.
That's it, and it's adapting a preexisting book although it'd be just as easy to frick that up, which she didn't.
American Psycho
Barbie
A League of Their Own
what else?
>Barbie
Goslingredditors who are too deep into their idolatry do not count as Cinemaphile
You don’t understand anon, the film with like 3 feminist monologues is actually secretly based, I swear
Nobody remembers them. Ask a Barbie watcher on the street the scene they remember most and it's Ken realizing that men actually do shit in the real world.
Troons like you had to watch the deuteragonist of the opposite sex take over your movie this time around.
I mean it's possible for directors to fail at what they were trying to do/people taking shit away from the movie that they didn't intend, best example is Starship Troopers.
The troons know and they've been coping ever since it happened. They always try to spin their failures into a win. They'll even champion a movie that made money because it had attractive white leads if they think it'd help them.
Barbie is a film too unfocused and frivolous to actually have a consistent philosophy. It’s like a woman rambling about feminism, twilight and ponies after 6 shots. You might as well take any message from it.
The irony is that Ken's arc is the most consistent. This story about an underdog second class citizen rising up easily overshadowed the rambling women who were supposed to deliver the real message.
And then Greta decides to cast an extremely impressionable actor to play the part.
It was like the asskicking "damsel in distress" character who hijacks the movie, in reverse and by accident.
Funniest part of the movie.
>The Patriarchy is like a bunch of animatronics haunted by dead children.
Nah I'm just kidding we don't hire women.
Pretty sure Scott has nothing to do with FNAF anymore because you're all insufferable homosexuals. Now we get the cringe shit like security breach and this movie. Literally a repeat of George Lucas, creator gets sick of getting backlash from autists so he sells his creation to people who will destroy it for lols.
Scott makes decisions and has lore control but essentially doesn't pen his name to it because some autistic alphabet people found out he donated to trump and shit. I still don't know why this has surprised people considering he's been very open about being deeply christian since the start
It was one of the first big 'let's play' games. So a lot of 8 year olds watched people on YouTube shit their pants in reaction vids, and it hit that sweet spot of running on any fricking device(especially including iPad's and iPhones), the algorithms pushing 20-30 minute videos, and a generation of young children switching from t.v. to internet streamers
No the first big lets play game was Slenderman and the eight pages
>one of the
I don't get the game. I looked at a "walkthrough" on youtube and it's all you do is press a light button or door switch and hope you don't have a moronic jump scare happen.
How the frick does a game that is the same quality as a '00 flash game get so many people liking it?
autism
It made zoomies poop their pants in terror. It was always shit for children.
you haven't seen all those posts by zoomers wanking off over the golden age of flash games and early 00s newgrounds? By which they actually mean godforsaken mid late 00s dark ages zoomie web portals with tourist trap tier names?
>mf never spent all day on andkon arcade
Survival horror is just more appealing than haunted house horror
>I don't get it, I boiled down an atmospheric game to generic, mathematical components without even trying to understand the mechanics anyway and now I'm suddenly disinterested in it.
I miss when trolling had a modicum of effort applied.
>being inside a broom closet and having shitty jump scares is straight bussin fr nocap
I pooped my pants in terror at it
homosexual. Ok, with that out of the way, it all started with the creator making Christian games, but people apparently complained his characters looked like creepy animatronics, so he took that and made the first Fnaf on a whim. The concept of a haunted ShowBiz Pizza/Chuck E Cheese's type place was pretty unique/untapped horror potential at the time, lots of people were creeped out of those animatronics as kids. I don't think it was ever meant to be the "scariest fricking game evar", it never pretended to be anything other than cheap jump scares, it was really more of resource management game, with a horror theme. The main objective/point of the game was to avoid the jumpscares, those were the punishment for failing. I don't think was even the greatest game ever or anything, it just ok/pretty good for what it was. As for why it became popular, that was admittedly due to kids mostly, it was wasn't too scary/just scary enough to be fun for them, was affordable, being only $5 on, and being accessible, most of the imary in tbe game just being pre-rendered images, no 3d models or environment, so it could run on most computer, and even other smart devices. Another thing could be the lore/theory fan scene, mostly dominated by MatPat (Game Theory guy). Also
eventually happened to the series, hell it's basically the reason for state of "horror" games nowadays
>zoomers
Zoomers weren't even born when FNAF released lol.
zoom zoom
Scotty doesn't know?
>not 120 hours
I spent 3 hours yesterday watching videos about how the AI works in each game even though I never played any of them
Can't hate Scott Cawthorne, he started from nothing and ACCIDENTALLY struck meme gold, now he's a billionaire.
>40 minutes longer than 2001: A space odyssey
It's not the official runtime. At least 1 hour and half of that will end up in the Bluray or whatever.
holy kino inc
>a movie that people stopped wanting years ago is 3 hours long
>post credit scene
>WHACK WHACK WHACK WHACK
>ominous whistle
>jumpscares the audience
>I've come talk about the Zoomer Horror initiative.
Why does the FANF trailer look pretty identical to the knock off with Nick Cage "Willy's Wonderland"
Willys wonderland is legitimate kino though. Cage silently beating the shit out of animatronics was great
>movies have less to say
>they get longer
How do you turn "Security guard takes his daughter to work and she is chased Freddy Frickbear" into a 3 hr movie?!
Guarantee they're going to squeeze in a bunch of "lore" and Markiplier cameos
it's a movie to get boomers to understand why zoomers like it.
everyone knows zoomesr do not watch movies at all.
It's gonna need Subway Surfers playing in the corner for zoomies to watch it that long.
>le haunted chuck e cheese
reddit as frick franchise always was
>1.5 speed
movie fixed
>2x speed
>Subway surfers down the bottom
>Incorrect subtitles over top half of the video
Certified kino
Isn't FNAF a series about a serial killer who murders children?
That seems pretty fricked up, so why is it so popular with kids?
Kids like macabre shit.
It's because picrel happened
>zoomers can watch a 10 hour stream of someone playing fnaf
>can't watch a 3 hour movie
>bingewatching some serial goyslop for 23 hours: easy
>watching a livestream of some moron playing Call of Duty for 9 hours: just fine
>one 3 hour movie: NOOOOO THIS IS TOO HECKIN LONG I'M GOING INSAAAAAAANE
The longer the more the more kino it is
The Chibidi Toilet epic grand finale is going to blow this shit out of the water. 6 hours runtime
Do you think there will be at least one sex scene in this movie? I think it's necessary to set the adult tone of the film and keep the children away.
I also hope to see religious symbolism in the film, considering that Scott is a Christian and has left his ideas in many of his past video games.
>Do you think there will be at least one sex scene in this movie?
No, what a moronic question.
Yeah the scene where I bang Roxy
I'm just sad they put springtrap on the first movie, he should've gotten his own film
>I WANT TO WATCH A MILLION GOYSLOP SEQUELS INSTEAD OF JUST WATCHING A GOOD MOVIE
You will never be a woman.
I don't think that making an "EVERYONE IS HERE" that lasts 3 hours is a good move, making one 1 and half to two hour movie cantered in one location with a group of animatronics would be the best way to do it I think, later if it's successful you can make something centered fully around this guy
>EVERYONE
What the frick are you talking about, troony? There are the main 4 animatronics and the main villain of the series. All of them are essential to the story.
>3 hour filmed divided into 30 second tiktoc clips
Seriously zoomies, what's up with the frickin hair? Lil homies look ridiculous.
>Lil homies
seems like you understand perfectly well
Aye pass the broccoli over here! I'm frickin starving
>watching this movie gives money to a Trump supporting, anti abortion Christian
Zoomer bros...
the frick? this needed Mario's runtime to be a hit
Watch the movie be more about the proto’s life than the fricking animatronics