Realistically, what would you do in this situation Cinemaphile?
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Realistically, what would you do in this situation?
Realistically, what would you do in this situation Cinemaphile?
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get snippety snabbed
Die
push it into a giant pot of boiling water
>Realistically, what would you do in this situation Cinemaphile?
RULES OF NATURE
pacific rim
OUT
FRICKING
SKILLED
>catches the pole arm midair
Fricking kek. Absolute kino.
the real apex predator of our planet
top lel
OH N
uncanny
>AAAAAAAAAUGH THAT CRAB WAS RED HOT
HUMAN BROS, NOT LIKE THIS
The Tom and Jerry yell played in my head
The door opening crab
That's gonna leave a mark!
its stil fricked up boiling them alive
I don't know why we boil anything alive to be honest, just chop off the fricking head with those crab scissors
GAY SPICE MAN GETS THE SHARP VISE HAND!!
Seafood is so fricking disgusting god damn. Here bro let me just eat these giant water spider scorpions after boiling them alive.
>t. lives in landlocked shithole
I live in the exact opposite of that you bug eating Black person.
Lying on the internet is rather silly anon
Why the frick would I lie about that you moron? Living near water isn't rare.
>dude all arthropods are LE SPIDERS!!!! I HECKIN LOVE SCIENCE!!!!!
bugslop agitprop. i shan't eat the insects, but i shall continue feasting upon delicious shrimp and lobster because they are not the same and no amount of gaslighting will change biology. additionally, you are not white.
Black folk love seafood, Black person. Shut the frick up and keep eating the water bugs.
Boiling them alive is evil. Literally chink tier pointless animal cruelty.
What's the alternative to boiling them alive? What's the most humane way?
Kill the crab just prior to placing it in the pot.
Boiling them alive is heckin' weckin' evil.
>processes physical pain differently than we do, but I'll pretend they don't
>has no emotional pain, but I'll pretend they do
>evolved to be food like everything else, but waaaaaaahhh
>reduces risk of dementia and Alzheimer's disease in a diet, but I'll supplement it with shitty little pills that are missing tens-of-thousands of nutrients we don't even have names for that I conscously know my body needs, but I've just gotta grandstand for these fake-ass morals about boiling a sea bug
And you're all Nazis for eating the crabby wabbys.
>processes physical pain differently than we do, but I'll pretend they don't
>has no emotional pain, but I'll pretend they do
There's no evidence of this.
>evolved to be food like everything else
That means humans are food, too.
risk of dementia and Alzheimer's disease
I don't have shit genetics, so that's irrelevant to me.
>"I don't have shit genetics."
>not smart enough to know that crabs don't suffer from emotional pain
Yes you do.
you do know they scream when being boiled alive right?
lobsters do too.
Not sure if bait or moronic
That's what he deserves for acting like a chinkoid and boiling an animal alive.
Aw, holy frick!!!
>Number One stops playing
>STOP THAT BLADE
>the real apex-ACK!
Frick a Delta-P/The Byford Dolphin movie needs to be made
no monsters just 9 atmospheres to 1
they just keep getting sucked in one after the other
The horror
The horror
when it's got ya, it's gotcha
Why he fade out at the end like a final fantasy enemy
>Alien Resurrection
RULES OF NATURE
GWAAAAAAAGH CRAB BATTLE
crabs are kino
Chinese are systematically over fishing the seas and destroying all the fish. The only reason I can think why is to deny other countries the fish.
And the booba gets something nice to eat
top kek
imagine living in a world where you find feasts just laying on the ground for free
imagine living in a world where you get born alone already conscious and a giant arachnid comes sprinting over to crush your body parts and devour you live
I was rooting for it, shame what happened
Enough masturbation for today.
kek
Reminds me of the guy who died after shoving a live coconut crab in his ass. The crab ripped his intestines, climbed to his chest, removed all his ribs and then crushed his lungs and heart, and then it just burst through his chest
....CRAB BATTTLLE
OLIOLIOLIOOOOOO
Stop saying that!
OLI-
Use my high CHA and SPEECH skills to convince him to attack a coastal fishing town in maine instead.
Attack its weak point for massive damage obviously
Disappointed it took almost 10mins to get here
Only correct answer
>Attack its weak point for massive damage obviously
This is a historically proven fact. Ask any Japanese
ancient japan was ahead of its time
attack his weak point for MASSIVE damage
send in this guy
brutal
>I eats it, eats it whole
aww, he's smiling 🙂
>Its mouth looks so soft, I bet it gives amazing hea-ACK
>the serial killer of the sea
Imagine the shits
>ohohohoho
That crab must be in fricking agony. Looks delicious. Respect to that fish. He earned his meal.
Not at all actually, this is one of the cleanest/quickest deaths in the animal kingdom. Pretty much just kills it instantly and crabs can lose arms without feeling much pain since they can regrow claws and shit.
>crab looks sad and in distress at his fate
>fish is gleeful and fricking smiles afterwards
You can't keep telling me that aquatic life even the crabs are fricking sentient enough to know what's going on. And yet you eat them
>In Elwood and Adam’s 2015 paper, they found that a painful situation triggers a stress response in crabs. They reported that this, combined with other findings, such as decapods changing their behaviour long-term after a painful incident, demonstrates that decapods are capable of experiencing pain (2). In another paper, Braithwaite (2010) concluded that the nervous system of decapods responds to pain in a more complex way than simple reflexive responses, supporting that they are capable of not only part one (the reflex response), but also part two, of the painful experience (3).
>Crabs are nocturnal prey animals so a dark shelter is a very important resource. In 2016, Magee and Elwood provided crabs with a dark shelter, but when inside they would receive a mild electric shock. At first the crabs would enter, but when electric-shocked, they would leave and stand in the light, unsheltered area (7). Another highly valued item is a hermit crab’s shell. Researchers electric-shocked hermit crabs through their shells and then offered them a new, lower quality one. The negative experience of the shock led to crabs giving up their higher quality shell to avoid the shock. Increasing shocks resulted in crabs moving to new shells quicker with less contemplation regarding shell quality (8). These studies provide examples of decapods trading-off valued resources to avoid pain, a type of behaviour that is more than just reflexive (1).
Not sure how those last 2 experiments aren't reflexive. If you get shocked by an object, you learn to avoid it, even if the object is highly valued. No animal would pass on it's genes if it couldn't learn that.
I dont care how sentient it is, it's food
You absolute piece of fricking shit, making animals fight like this, I’d like to throw you in a cage with a hungry pack of pits and see how you handle it.
>fight
I think he's just feeding the fishy
Snibbeddy sn-ACK
Based mbu puffer
I have a green spot puffer and he does this to snails
imagine the crunchy goodness
>based on actual Japanese history
>giant enemy crab
Best episode in the entire show
strap em in
What the frick is wrong with our species man
There is basically no scale of death like this so consistently
It's like humanity are fricking demons
no, me just hungry
Crabs are fricking disgusting. If you eat that shit you'll eat bugs like they want you to.
Cows, pigs, fishes and chickens are the only animals we should eat
Says who you fricking moron, what makes pigs any cleaner
moron
SandBlack person moron
I'm not even opposed to eating bugs, the only reason I don't do it is out of spite towards the ruling classes that intend to force me to eat mealworms while they eat filet mignon. I'd eat horse, dog, cat, and human as long as it was ethically sourced; I don't give a damn.
yeah but sea bugs arn't being pushed by the ruling class so my brain doesn't automatically revolt against it
>it’s ok if it’s some other animal
Consumption of animals is fine or it isn’t, there is no middle ground otherwise that makes any sense. It’s all just cope to make yourself feel better about killing innocent creatures for purely selfish and greedy reasons. Take the vegan pill or shut the frick up.
you think that's bad, we kill whole acres of wheat within minutes.
Welcome to apex predators you fricking tard
every time you wash your hands you kill millions of living beings
This. You either go full Jain or stop fricking whining
I prefer to use strictly non-anti-bacterial soap.
Listen, if we don't tell them when they're small like that, they turn into giant frickoff crab monsters like OP showed us. It's for the best. You're probably too young to remember but back in the day a giant Dungeness crab obliterated several towns in Northern California. Look up Crabfest '97.
Verification not required
I walked through blood and bones at Crabfest '97 looking for my brother.
He was in Maine.
I believe you
would watch an Eight Legged Freaks but with crabs
sounds kino
God it feels great to be at the top of the food chain.
Whales eat millions of krill in a single bite
>b-b-but, those are non-sentient invertebrates. you can't count th-
exactly
>There is basically no scale of death like this so consistently
t.never seen a nature documentary
id like to show you my webm of lions brutally mauling a baby deer but i cant find it.
humans are far more HUMANE (notice human in is that word) than nature is
yea the sentience of a creature that allows it to understand pain in other lifeforms and feel the compulsion to alleviate it is an incredible thing
it's not exclusive to humans though
Dogs are capable of empathy but the one in your gif is reflexively trying to bury food for later. My own dog does the same when he doesn't feel like finishing his meal, despite having nothing to bury it in.
>It's like humanity are fricking demons
You're starting to wake up, anon. Don't listen to the other replies; the vast majority of people are incapable of objectivity when it comes to this topic. Recognizing that humans are demonic is the first step toward transcending your humanity.
This, so much this, Cinemaphilesister's. F*CK humanity!!! I can't wait for transhumanism space communism so I can finally become a real furry woman in cyberspace
>autists can only engage with ideas and concepts via extreme black and white categorization
Many such cases!
people gotta eat, chud
If other predators were smart enough to do this they would do it. We are predators.
"Food comes from the grocery store" homosexual ass post
Makes you wonder... why are we keeping humans alive... and who is above that
animals literally eat each other ass first while still alive and screaming in agony as their soft parts get ripped apart over the course of 20 minutes
Humans really are demons. Imagine if a bunch of aliens liked the taste of human flesh and factory farmed us like we do pigs.
watch under the skin
Intelligence is not relative. Once a species has attained a certain level of self-awareness and ability for conceptualisation it becomes a disgusting prospect to farm them, no matter how much more intelligent than that you may be yourself.
If aliens were big enough c**ts to farm a sapient species like humans they'd be big enough c**ts to wipe them all out or enslave them too which has already been done to death. It's not comparable to farming animals that don't even understand the concept of 'tomorrow'.
Correct.
Pigs are pretty intelligent. What happens if the alien species is as far above us intellectually as we are above pigs, and thus justify doing to us what we do to them? That would defeat your moral argument entirely.
Alternatively, what if the aliens just don't give a frick about the morality of it, because they like the way we taste? Or justify it another way? Or simply lack the concept of morality whatsoever? Pigs can't comprehend our moral system, so it's doubtful we could understand aliens'. Any way you slice it, what we do to other animals is messed up.
>What happens if the alien species is as far above us intellectually as we are above pigs, and thus justify doing to us what we do to them? That would defeat your moral argument entirely.
I literally addressed that point by stating that intelligence is NOT RELATIVE.
Just because an alien might be 10x smarter than us doesn't suddenly make humans non-sapient in intelligence and 'dumb enough' to be farmed without moral (as humans understand it) qualms.
>Pigs can't comprehend our moral system, so it's doubtful we could understand aliens
Yeah no shit. A pig's moral system is 'I will fricking eat anything I can'. Throw a helpless little human baby into a pigpen and they'll devour it chunk by chunk without a second thought. By the pigs' own damn moral system we're not really doing anything wrong to them.
Technocapital has come back in time to farm us, though the consumption isn't quite as visceral.
Why would they do that when they can just eat crab like us?
The industrial revolution is the monster, not man.
8 billion mouths to feed
You think any animal wouldn't do it to us if they could?
Wild Gorillas regularly show empathy and patience with human intruders, and they could easily fricking kill if they wanted. But they just don't. Don't humanize other things by adding our worst traits to them. What we do is uniquely human.
Humans regularly help random stray animals too you moron, and no one eats gorillas.
Anon, every animal that has ever lived has lived in constant fear of being eaten alive. And almost every animal that has ever lived, died from being eaten alive.
That's because its a necessity. With our intelligence and way of life now there is no need for the slaughter we do
>just feed 8 billion people with synthetic mystery meat bro
We shouldn't have 8 billion people in the first place and its that exponential growth that is why you're gonna have to eat bugs eventually
people really are still buying the overpopulation meme.
Did you see the machine killing 100 crabs a minute? All day, every day? And that's like .00000000000001% of the horrors happening at every moment.
cope n seethe about it, as apex predators with technology we can have 8 billion humans and many more to come, while having massive industrial farms planning a pigs entire bloodline 1000 years in advance
>the amount of cope directed towards these posts
>It's like humanity are fricking demons
We're really not, all predators are like this. We're just more advanced so we can murder on this scale.
Just remember, when the technologically superior aliens arrive and do this to us, they're not "evil demons" either and we pretty much deserved it.
Honestly seems pretty humane, they instantly die. Not much better you can do for food
Bugs are worse. Have you never seen a hornet commit bee genocide?
>Please standby for strogification
Remember the 600 million
>What is wrong with our species.
Nothing. We are just the most successfull due to a combination of intelligence, tool use, and communication abilities.
If you believe other animals wouldn't do worse if given our capabilities you are probably a hippy that fricks dogs or farm animals (Canadian).
>we
You have none of those things
Projection is a hell of a thing, anon.
But I'd keep it to yourself from now on. It doens't really work that well as a rhetorical tactic.
>muh projection
Nice defence mechanism
I dont need much else for an obviously incorrect statement thrown out at me out of frustrated petulance.
Go on, do another cry about how horrible people are. Maybe talk about how only humans do wars? Or slavery?
I want to mock you more.
Go on.
You seem to be getting very upset about a comment on an anime website
Not upset, excited.
I enjoy mocking idiots.
That was a weak deflection BTW.
Oh, okay
lmao at that pic.
Where is from?
That "crab" is actually a highly intelligent and brutally violent species, in the fictional universe it takes place in. The Prador have done much worse than humanity ever has.
damn that homie got decrabitated
ahaha
i am still waiting for some peta activist to make a high budget scifi horror movie where humans get treated like cattle by some hyper advances hungy alien race
They could make this into a movie for that
Shit was brutal. Not long after I got stuck and it turned ghey also gunplay was shit
great anime but that is not what i was asking at all.
I mean where people get put in little boxes and machines cut them into pieces
I'm sure there's already shitloads of hentai like that
Eh, Bad Taste does that but on a miniscule budget.
watch cube
GANTZ manga last arc.
I miss this lil parasitic homie like you can't believe
Him never having thoughts about that thing sucking him off was so unrealistic.
>Hand stares and judges you every time you jerk off
No thanks.
Is this anything like The Thing? Cus that's one of my favorite movies and I might have interest in it
Kind of. The villainous aliens certainly are somewhat similar to the one in The Thing.
Were the live action flicks any good? I really liked the manga, but never bothered with anything else.
That would be anti-semitic (not real semites).
In the novel Prador Moon, the crab species you see in this love, death and robots episode does exactly that to humanity.
sounds creepy
is it a horror book?
war of the worlds?
pretty close to what i mean, good catch anon
i think an entire movie just about that could be a smash hit. mix of saw and alien scifi.
maybe the idea can be that a group of humans get abodcuted as food and the aliens let the humans decide themselves who gets turned to foot first
the twist is that the aliens like the meat of evil humans more so who ever outlast them all gets eaten extra slowly violently
Did the Gantz movie get to that part? (although we were more like poplers to them)
Watch that shitty movie The Farm
>strap em in
>crab chud
>crud
I'm going to be rich because I'm the only person who knows where you can find white mud.
Go Vegan boys
bro they do far worse things to plants
>vegan
Imagine ripping off all unborn children off of a bush and stuffing your face with what essentially are embryos. Vegans don't have a moral high ground. Just because plants can't scream (properly), doesn't mean it's any less gruesome. Switch to 100% artificially manufactured nutrients and you have a horse to ride on.
that's some quake 4 shit.
>we do this shit to crabs
>we also literally MILK THEM FOR THEIR BLOOD
if animals made horror movies they'd all be about humans
Is this the stuff you drink to live forever?
IIRC it's used in the biomedical industry to manufacture vaccines or something.
Horseshoe crabs have blood that carries oxygen using copper, rather than iron, hence the blue color. This also helps it react very potently against bacteria, so horseshoe crab blood is used to check medical equipment for sterility before it gets used. Just about every scalpel and needle you've ever seen has been in contact with a component from this stuff
>in b4 some /misc/ incel pops up to tell you that you're a trans commie if you find anything about this to be morally objectionable
we dont need pol to tell us that you're a soulless freak who is okay with animal cruelty.
/misc/ is pro animal cruelty?
there actually is a horror movie about something just like that
Workin at the crab wash
I smiled
Even though I am not vegan . I genuinely think future humans are going to look back at us I think we are savages for stuff like this . You guys argue that we are the apex predators and t he y would do the same thing but they is a difference between killing to Survive and killing purely for profit most of this is going to get thrown away
It's a fricking crab you moron.
>you will live to see man-made horrors beyond your comprehension
but are they all right??
>What do you do for a living?
>I put the crab in the horror machine
Why are people acting like this is an example of extreme cruelty? If you went out crabbing yourself with a net and caught 10 crabs and then killed them all yourself, what's the difference? It's like none of you homosexuals have ever gone fishing before. People do crueler shit than this out on the docks. Not saying that's a good thing, but putting a crab on a machine to automatically do the shit that you would have to do manually anyway is not an example of cruelty. I can't even tell if they're alive or not, it looks like they aren't, or they're at least stunned, and if they are they'd die instantly anyway. They're fricking sea bugs, they just grow larger than land bugs because they live underwater.
The mechanical, assembly line nature of it makes it feel cold, uncaring and scary. You could imagine the roles reversed and an alien race doing this to humans and it would be unsettling. But, ultimately we built it because it is efficient and humane. Perhaps what disturbs us is the lengths to which we have to go to sustain modern society, and something about it disgusts us at a fundemental level.
Do you find sawmills equally horrifying when they cut trees into planks of wood? Go out crabbing for yourself and then tell me you wouldn't be tempted to buy a machine like that after painstakingly trying to de-shell your dozenth crab for 1 mouthful of meat.
>Do you find sawmills equally horrifying when they cut trees into planks of wood?
Not really, until it reaches a certain point where the mind boggles and you have to ask, "How long can we keep this up?"
Have you read The Last Question by Isaac Asimov? Very salient story. Yes, we can keep it up for a very long time. But a very long time is not forever.
No shit thats why we gotta get to space and tear it up too. Human nature to spread out, we're nomads man
Still can't keep it up forever. Entropy must reach maximum. But I admit that is beyond the scope of the subject.
call Black personman. He'll know what to do
Embrace crabitalism
cast it
Not much.
Frick I didn't see that one.
split my lungs with blood and thunder
nothing tbh
snib! :DDD
you can see the crab's mouth open right before it snibs
spooky little thing
Get owned homosexual cat
accept the giant crabs as our new overlords
Guns exist in this setting so I don't know why the standard armament on this ship against sea monsters is a sword
buncha slack jawed newhomosexuals ‘round here
Crabs are comfy.
I need three things:
>A flame thrower
>wienertails sauce
>Drawn butter.
I have more regard for the life of a crab than I do for most people tbh
>helicopter
>THEY FLY NOW?!
>it ain't me starts playing
>you're not getting away THAT easily!
>helicrabter
it's evolving
> h-he's fast..
>they can fly now?
>the only short where the protagonist manages to survive
>guy is a stoic hero that puts the greater good above his selfish grew or himself
honestly my highlight of that season
Equip quake res and helicopter it's feet
Greet death with open arms.
Cinemaphile threads are the best
>Go Vegan boys
Attack his weak point for massive damage
yes yes yes hello! I have returned to Cinemaphile.org to answer your inquiry. i have not been on this website in several years but my friend texted me and told me to return in order to answer this very very very import inquiry of yours. The answer to your question of what would I do in that situation is this: I don't know.
I trust the matter is now closed and this thread can be deleted and forgotten forever.
Kind regards,
no one posted the crab meets highly pressurized sea pipe crack webm/gif
No one needs to, seen it so many times it's burned into my brain.
Are you supposed to root for the main guy in this story? Because I wanted him to get eaten just as much. What a douchebag
all is crab
Best thread on Cinemaphile all day
what kind of crab magic is this, I thought the crab was swimming away and the guy was chasing him until halfway through
this episode was awesome
love it
Love Death & Robots
S03E02
hey guys watch my crab for a seco-
>*SHING*
I dont believe its selfish to eat defenseless shellfish.
How do you want to measure the scale? Yes, billions of humans kill hundreds of billions of animals a year for food. Billions of predatory insects kills hundreds of billions of insects for food. Billions of fish and reptiles and mammalian predators do the same for their respective prey animals.
If the scale is numerical, then humans are hardly unique, except in that we have automated the process so we don't all have to kill our own food.
I think there is a qualitative difference in impregnating, animals so that you can systematically cull their children for food.
literally no other animal does this.
Parasitic wasps lays eggs in their prey and leaves it paralyzed to be eaten alive from the inside over the course of days or weeks. Nature is inventive in its horror.
Respectfully, you seem like a person who hasn't worked around farms or food production.
I'm not saying nature isn't cruel. It is. It's just not systemically cruel... Wasp prey do have 'a chance' at survival, they just drew a shitty straw. A baby chick being sent to the razor blaze factory was literally created to live for a brief period of time and then slaughtered. There was no game of life to be played. I just think its different.
I see your point. And you're right, we are systematic in how we produce food. I think at least in some areas we try to be as humane as possible, but its unavoidable that meat production means taking lives.
As for something like the male chicks being destroyed directly after hatching, that is horrible. Ideally there would be a way to engineer laying hens so they only produce more hens
>systemically cruel..
except it is, the end result is the same. there is no difference itme. You're making a spiritual statement
The result isn't the totality of the issue people have though. Nobody is mad animals are dying, animals will die either way. It's that path that animals takes to death people have issue with (largely, so ignoring PETA types).
If I were to rape and murder you children tonight, would you claim "it doesn't matter because they were always going to die"? probably not because the path they took to death was qualitatively different. In nature animals by and large have some statistical chance of survival, a lot of with is out of the control of their predators. There aren't any animals that both control the environment of their prey and control is lifespan of that prey. Natural predation is a game of chance both the prey and predator play; "maybe I come upon you just after birth and kill you immediately, or maybe your mom gores be through the neck with a horn", "maybe I inject your eyeballs with parasitic eggs, or maybe I don't even find you hiding underneath a leaf". In all cases the predator is dealing with it's own odds. Humans don't do that lmao, we just will farm the next 100 generations of your young to be killed a few months to years after they are born, often in pretty shit conditions.
No other animal is intelligent enough to do this. We are distinct from the natural order and as such we may as well be gods compared to other animals.
They should just have these fall into a giant deep fryer and export the bags of it to China.
Anyone got that gif of crab making a ''cutthroat'' gesture?
My favorite movie War of the Worlds
Humans are incredibly humane but the nature of what we do is undeniably more brutal than it needs to be.
The fricking asian dudes that eat live octopuses can get fricked though.
>The fricking asian dudes that eat live octopuses can get fricked though.
We are literally too smart. We begin to question things that just don't need to be questioned. Octopus can give me fuel so I eat it. End of story.
We shouldn't do anything to animals we don't do to ourselves.
I would have no qualms about eating people were it legal
I have qualms about eating dogs, horses, pigs, dolphins, octopuses, and of course, humans.
The fact you would have no qualms says a lot. Our species is going to fricking go extinct.
The sooner the better honestly
Hopefully that doesn't work in reverse because I jerk myself off
Humans can feel and show compassion which is why we are the best life form. But then you see us doing this shit and we look lower than ants.
And animals routinely rip developing babies out of each other and eat them as the mother lies mauled and watching, dying the slowest most brutal of deaths, before ite her turn. And the animal won't give her a swift death. They'll eat the soft parts and have her alive as long as she can withhold
And yet you will compare a machine that does it for us in a quick death to Nature's Cruelty?
Simplier times.
LIFE FEEDS ON LIFE FEEDS ON LIFE
Torturing the world into submission!
Humanity could be in thrall to a demon who feeds on pain, a demon who rewards his servants with power in proportion to the blood they spill.
Now I take my pills so I don’t think about this as much anymore.
Amen! I love Derrick Jensen. Though accepting his philosophical conclusions while continuing to serve the machine hurts my soul and makes me wonder whether my daily servitude is my real belief system after all.
>sir I did not rape that woman
>I pleasured her
This reminds me of how disgusting the whole covid thing was. How these people covet life above all else because they have invested everything in this physical world. I do feel sorry for them, but they will die, and they need to die. Memento Mori. Remember that you will die.
richard is probably just high in emapthy
accept my fate
>BOSS FIGHT
The guy is 1.78m btw
>Japanese spider crab
Is that the one that tastes like shit or is it the coconut crab?
Other animals should just git gud if they don’t want to be eaten
harass 'em
Superior aquatic armored death machine coming through. No crab can compete with BIG SNAPPING wiener
I wish I was a crabman
Girl phoned me up once and said "anon, you're not gonna believe it, I've got crabs!"
Well I told her she could go be a prostitute somewhere else!
When I went round to get my stuff, imagine my surprise to see a tank of the little crustaceans! Ho!
Asked if we could make up and she kicked me out huh
I tell ya, what's with the crabby attitude? Ho!
protect mother earth from any alien attack
In all honesty if an EDF or starship troopers scenario cropped up Id join the meat grinder in a second because itd feel purposeful as opposed to dying in the desert for israelites or waging