>recommends to go through Mines of Moria
>has never taken the route
>has not heard from his cousin in decades
>doesnt even know the password to get in
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 Tip Your Landlord Shirt $21.68 |
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>recommends to go through Mines of Moria. >has never taken the route. >has not heard from his cousin in decades
It was better than freezing to death in the mountains. Saruman knew they were coming.
casper knew this
>freezing to death
tropical hot Black person cope, dwarves are highly resistant to extreme temperatures
>highly resistant
but not immune
also they had the halflings to think about
gimli is one of the good ones
Saruman goaded the mountain into defending itself from Gandalf.
His intention was to force the party through Moria
why doesn't gandalf use a heating spell. what about those stupid ass elves that give them self tying rope but nothing to keep them warm, fricking homosexuals.
This could never be made today.
Peter Dinklage would not allow it.
>Peter Dinklage would not allow it.
What is the deal with him any way? Has he become a crazy SJW?
He's the tallest dwarf so he decides the fate of all dwarfs
He b***hes on twitter anytime people want to cast jumbos (dwarf slur for normal-sized people) in dwarvish roles. He claims dwarf roles belong to the dwarves.
It's the opposite, he doesn't want dwarves cast in dwarf roles because he thinks it's demeaning.
pulled the old "frick you, I got mine" I see
Yeah he doesn't seem to get that he's probably the only midget in human history with a leading man face.
100%
slowly worked his way to stardom and pulled up the ladder behind him with a veneer of "this is the socially conscious thing to do"
i hope it bites him in the ass somehow like ProZD complaining that only asians should be voicing asians and then only getting roles playing asians
Jumbos? wouldn’t “biggers” be a better word?
He’s an angry elf.
qrd?
Dinklage is a huge c**t who thinks he's supposed to be the only midget actor so when he got successful he pulled the ladder up and started attacking any other midget actor who took midget roles or any production that casts midgets be ause it's "offensive". Meanwhile these are disabled people who need to feed their fricking families but he doesn't give a frick. Literally b***hed about midgets being cast in Snow fricking White, a completely dignified role featuring beloved characters.
>he pulled the ladder up
>”using midget actors for midget roles is… LE BAD!”
t. Midget who has earned 50+ million by playing a midget role
Hey man he was just playing a role that happened to be midget.
Why is the password in elvish? Shouldn't it be in dwarfish? Elves and dwarfs don't even like eachother.
its supposed to be an ancient city. could be from a time when they got along
Right, before all the shitty brownoid sub races were genocided and the original triology took place.
Dwarves can't do password magic so they subcontracted it
Genuinely Tolkien like explanation
>"‘Well, here we are at last!’ said Gandalf. ‘Here the Elven-way from Hollin ended. Holly was the token of the people of that land, and they planted it here to mark the end of their domain; for the West-door was made chiefly for their use in their traffic with the Lords of Moria. Those were happier days, when there was still close friendship at times between folk of different race, even between Dwarves and Elves.’ "
Do you think they, y’know?
Yep, that's where orcs came from.
How didn't Frodo know the elvish word for friend?
Gandalf, Aragorn, and obviously Legolas all spoke Elvish and none of them figured it out, so I don't think it's a matter of not knowing the word.
He asked word for word "what's the elvish word for friend" but I think it was just an artificial forced line to set up Gandalf saying the answer.
The name of the kingdom within the Lonely Mountain, Erebor, is also an elvish place name. Despite all their rivalry it seems dwarves are closer to elves than they would like to think.
it sort of explains itself. if there is an elvish magic door to a dwarven kingdom and the magic password is friend, what could that POSSIBLY mean
gimli never even suggested going to moria. the only reason he was in rivendell was to seek counsel from elrond and to understand if they heard anything about the colony - i think it was like 25 years with no contact. gandalf is the only one who pushed to go into moria. it's handled so poorly in the movie like gimli is shocked to see a bunch of dwarven skeletons
>gimli is shocked to see a bunch of dwarven skeletons
he was an optimist
>tfw Gimli entered the completely dark, abandoned halls of Moria and *still* was somehow surprised to find dead dwarves
Maybe he thought Balin was going to jump out and yell "surprise!"
>Gimli entered the completely dark, abandoned halls of Moria and *still* was somehow surprised to find dead dwarves
heh i'm sure my kin are around here somewhere g-guys... just you wait... salted pork as far as the eye can see...............
>Hah look, this tombstone says "here lies Balin", my cousin is always pulling pranks like this
>"Drums in the deep, they are coming?", lol what a prankster
>Heh one of his buddies dressed up like an orc and stabbed Frodo, classic Balin
>A Balrog? No, my cousin Balin is a bit of a pyrotechnician.
>Let us go back to Moria. My cousin Balin is still waiting to give us a royal welcome
>it has all been in vain, the Fellowship is broken
>well any you guys want to go to Moria? My cousin Balin would give us a royal welcome!
>If we need troops to defend Minas Tirith, why not ask my cousin Balin to send some? We can just pop over to Moria real quick and ask, he'll give us a royal welcome.
>instead of going to the Black Gate, we should go to Moria, my cousin Balin's got a place there and he throws some wild parties
Why didn't the elves send soldiers to Minas Tirith?
If they die they simply teleport to the Undying Lands.
Why were the elves dicks in this scene?
Galadriel already knew through Elrond's missives and messengers that the Fellowship will reach her realm eventually. Literally Glorfindel was sent by Galadriel to represent her and Lothlorien.
its just bants m8
>Why were the elves dicks in this scene?
galadriels gal pal was the wife of thingol which is the elven king that the israelite dwarves killed and caused the destruction of the kingdom of which is the single event for the eternal hatred between dwarves and elves. its also the reason legolas dad hates him who is a sindar elf (thingol was king of the sindar). after thingol was back-stabbed by israelites galadriels friend (who she learned magic from like the lembas bread) left middle earth
>galadriel's gal pal
surprised cheese elf had a friend
her friend was a god a la gandalf and a very distant relative of elrond and aragorn
>Glorfindel
Didn't movie Arwen ate him?
It's not explained at all in the movie but Moria was lost a long time ago, Balin led the expedition to reclaim it and that failed due to Durin's Bane.
The Elves that used to live next door to Kazadum were big smiths and metalworkers. They got along with the Dwarves more than anyone else when they bonded over their craftwork autism.
Then they made the rings or power and Sauron wiped them out. The door is very old.
That was the trade gate. That side of the mountain was facing the elves, during khazadum's height that gate is where the elves would enter the city to trade. So the elven trade caravan would arrive, the elven caravan leader would speak "friend" in their native tongue and the door would open.
Isn't Dwarven just a shitty version of Elvish in most adaptations? They probably wanted a more aesthetic door.
>The name of the kingdom within the Lonely Mountain, Erebor, is also an elvish place name. Despite all their rivalry it seems dwarves are closer to elves than they would like to think
dorfs are ultra israelites and dont like speaking their super secret language in front of others. youre ignoring the fact that they literally never speak in their own tounge and are always talking in westron or using elvish in the books/movie. their battle cry is one of the only examples of dawrfish there is
Why are they hiding their language? Even today it's considered incomplete compared to Elvish or Rohirrim or even Black Speech due to a lack of sources.
>Why are they hiding their language? Even today it's considered incomplete compared to Elvish or Rohirrim or even Black Speech due to a lack of sources.
those things arent related. westron also doesnt have a lot of sources but thats because everyone is speaking it all the time and you never see many untranslated bits of it.
dwarves are just greedy secretive israelites like actual irl israelites and keep their cultural customs secret and within the tribe. no reason other than being israelites is every given i believe
You think she'd frick me?
trust me, you couldnt handle the chussy. you humies think latina pussy is bad...
Maybe if you wore a bullhead mask, otherwise enjoy being maximum overcucked.
>chorfs literally worship a bull demon called hashut which is probably a lesser chaos entity and not even in parity with the big 4
If you want a shorty find a proper dawi maiden.
>LET US GO THROUGH DONNER'S PASS!
IIRC in the books he knows something bad happened to the dwarves at Moria (after all, nobody's heard anything from them in like a year) and he wants to go there to investigate. Idk why the movie made him into this buffoon who's expecting they'll have a big party or something when they show up.
I don't like this meme because i don't get it
LET THE RING BEARER DECIDE
>Frodo you god-damned fuzzfoot if you frick this up for me...
Where is Gimli from? Where is his usual home? Did he live west of the Shire and just decide to go to Rivendale?
>Where is Gimli from?
North Carolina
he is royalty descendant of the first Dwarven King of Moria
He doesn't live in Moria. He lives somewhere. Where?
in a bed and breakfast place on the coast
he lives in Warwick Davis house
The dwarves have towns northwest of the Shire. That's why in the Hobbit, nobody is too surprised to see a dozen of them walking around, it's common for them to pass through.
Yes, those are the Blue Mountains where Gimli comes from.
Iron hills or blue mountains
No sir, he's from Kentucky.
Erebor.
Erebor is east of Moria, surely those dwarves would go check in on their buddies if traveling to the west across the mountains
My mom basically did this with our trip to Estonia
>it's Moveria
>its a riddle, whats the israeli word for friend?
>goy-im
>a toll booth reveals itself
>and they call it a mine... a MINE!!!
>so anyway, we kept mining for mithril and eventually found satan
LET THE GUY WHO HAD NO IDEA ANY OF THIS SHIT EVEN EXISTED 2 WEEKS AGO DECIDE!
What's the deal with dwarves anyways? Aren't they not created by Eru Illuvatar but by another Valar originally? I thought that only Eru had the power to actually create life but the dwarves weren't originally created by him.
something like that. the original dude was essentially their puppet master and eventually forfeited them to eru who gave them life. some of the language describing moria/durin/the mirrormere is my favourite stuff from the book
yeah they were made by another Valar, in secret.
I believe, but am not certain, so the dwarves were not sentient or something, but when Eru discovered them He was impressed and gave them sentience.
Or I could just it up since my Silmarillion is literally right next to me
Yes. They were created by Aule, who's like the god of crafting and rocks and that sort of thing. Eru wasn't happy about it, but he decided to let the dwarves live.
They call them dwarves but hobbits are even smaller?
They were created by the angel whos job it is to share knowledge, be ause he was so eager to share knowledge he basically made dolls to talk to. God saw this and reprimanded him for impersonating life and ordered him to destroy them, which he agreed to do, but because they were made with love instead of evil like the orcs, God took pity and gave them life and stopped Aule at the last second. So it's like a little bit of Prometheus with the clay humans and a little bit of Binding of Isaac. When they die dwarves return to the earth, elves go to the halls of mandos to be potentially reincarnated, humans go to heaven.
>a little bit of Binding of Isaac
According to wikipedia the Binding of Isaac occurs at "the mount of the LORD" in "the land of Moriah". Idk the connection but at the very least it's a cool coinkydink
>go over Caradhas with Sarumon's voice in the wind
>go near Isengard and be on the menu for 10,000 uruks
>go under Moria with the balrog
What can you do
stay positive and hope your cousin Balin dealt with that balrog
Take the fricking deus ex machina eagles.
But where do you get the butterflies to contact them? Sarumans wind blew them all away
Sale from Rivendell through the Greyflood to Linhir and then walk through Gondor to Mordor.
One does not simply walk into Mordor
They just walked into it, wtf are you talking about, Boromir?
Through a secret path up the steep mountain side that only Gollum knew about.
there were stairs carved into the cliff. it couldnt be much of a secret
Then why was it unguarded? It was clearly abandoned long ago because the presence of man eating spiders.
The man eating spider IS the guard anon
>the very air you breathe is a poisonous fume
That's a big fat lie for sure.
>Get raped by pirates prowling the coast
Try again
What are they pirating? There's no global commerce when everyone lives on the same little island
Probably still easier to move goods over sea than by land, even if you're just going down the coast.
>little island
It’s a continent the size of Europe and Asia anon
The world outside middle Earth is populated.
Here we go
what an ugly piece of shit
isn't that the 2nd age?
i thought 3rd age looked like
Yeah you're right.
is anything beyond Rhun/Harad even canon?
No
don't believe so
thanks
No, that's the 1st age. At the end of the 1st age is when half of middle-earth got flooded and it turned into that map you posted.
>here we go JR, don't frick it up. Need a name for the kingdom where all of the kings are gone
>....Gone dor
>ok that sounds pretty cool
>damn but what will we call the area that the Party travels before they get there?
>....Area dor
>Frick! I need another name for the bad guys country before I the end of the night
>.....More dor
> Hmmm I need a name for these men that can have children
> ... Womb man
>sees strange ring
>hold on lemme check a thing real quick
>goes to minas tirith
>comes back
>ok it's actually le ebil super ring we have to do the same exact route as i did but on foot
what the frick?
In the book Gandalf goes away for like 7 years or some shit? I can't remember exactly.
>>ok it's actually le ebil super ring we have to do the same exact route as i did but on foot
>what the frick?
uhhhhh well you see like we sorta wasted SO much time when i was basically already sure this was _the_ ring that like uhhh... wellll.... literally everyone is probably going to try to kill us so we should take the most backroad of backroads.... yeahh..... my bad frodo... my bad.....
it's dead ass like 11 or 17 years, no cap. been a while since Ive read it.
I think it's 17 years. Bilbo's 111th birthday (the day he leaves) is also Frodo's 33rd birthday, and Frodo doesn't leave the shire until the day after his 50th birthday.
Are you telling me Frodo is single that entire time?
yes and for the rest of his life after. Strange thing about the bagginses being life long bachelors. Downright peculiar.
I know frodo was supposed to be forever changed and damaged by his mission but bilbo was a gay for sure
Why would Tolkien write his characters as bachelors when he was married?
>Tolkien was a wizard and a warrior and an archer and a king and a tree and
Stealth.
>on foot
I remember all the shots of them walking but I also seem to recall Sam being sad about saying goodbye to the horses and Arragorn says something like "they're food horses, they'll find their way back". Did they actually ride horses or were they just pack horses or am I miss remembering things? I could have sworn the horse had a name
nvm just seen this after refresh
I find it incredibly interesting that Tolkien referred to them as "food horses". Was Aragorn seriously saying that they'll go home because they're drawn back to the slaughter house in the shire?
He meant that they will die instantly in the wilds and end up as orc food
Why does Aragorn want to feed the orcs? Is he hoping to gain their favour?
It's groundwork for his future tax policy
This is why Middle Earth needs instant messaging and phones. Can shoot fireballs out of their ass but cant conjure simple technology. Completely unbelievable. Immersion ruined.
>let the ring-bearer decide...Frodo...
>we shall take the pass through Mines of Moria
>no problem, ring-bearer, I hope I dont die down there! ... because it would be your fault if I do! Were already half way through the mountains too and weve heading back because you said so!
kek i had the same thought the last time i watched
So now that we're in full revisionist deconstructionist swing and shitting even on Fellowship, how long will it take until we can go back to thinking they're masterpieces?
Fellowship is still a mastercraft. I'm still stunned how they wrote, outlined, storyboarded and filmed all three films yet fellowship is leagues ahead of the other two. And its not just an editing/pacing thing, it genuinely looks out fricking standing where as the other two look very flat at times.
all in 3 years too. It's funny how they would helicopter the cast up the mountains to film the eagle eye shots of them traveling, nowadays you would cgi that shit or at best hire locals with cgi skins
I'm not a realism nerd but it always bothers me how the mithril somehow protects frodo being pressed against a wall by a 10 ton troll. They should have made it a cutting motion and then reveal he wasn't hurt.
>funny how they would helicopter the cast up the mountains
except for sean bean
>They should have made it a cutting motion and then reveal he wasn't hurt
Especially because chainmail is meant to protect against slashing and not stabbing.
It will work decently well against stabbing if worn with a padded coat underneath. That's the rule of thumb with medieval armor, everything is worn together with a shitload of padding.
Jackson clearly wanted to do Fellowship more than anything. It's like they took every miniscule detail into account when making the first movie, while the other 2 movies just kinda had to be done for completion sake
What the FRICK was his problem?
Why didn't they just make for the Gap of Rohan?
because the gap of rohan/west of the southern end of the Misty Mountains was Dunland full of Dunlandings who didn't like the people of Rohan and were basically buddies with Saruman at this point.
How the frick did Bill know how to get home?
he was a good friend
Horses are smart like dogs.
it's a Tesla horse
Bill died instantly. Aragorn just didn't have the heart to tell Sam.
He was most certainly consumed by something. Lone horses are easy prey on and hunt.
In the books he walks all the way back to Bree and Sam reunites with him on his way back to the Shire
the same way cows know how to get home. and the same way you do. memory and repetition. Bill was a pack horse that lived in Bree that most likely made that route 1000s of times. look up "drunk amish" on youtube and you'll see videos of passed out drunks on buggies getting taken home by horses. simply put they know where their food is.
Bill is outright murdered by the Watcher in the animated version.
>mythic material with impossible properties
>....mithril
>a pure Unobtanium shirt!
If mithril was so insanely valuable, you would think the dwarves would basically own middle-earth by this point in the story. A shirt of mithril is worth more than the entire Shire, and the dwarves crank out a fricking castle gate made of the stuff at the end of ROTK. They could straight-up buy out all the human kingdoms if they felt like it.
The answer to "what is Aragorn's tax policy" is probably "whatever the dwarves say it is".
It's only worth that much because of artificial scarcity. the dwarves mine it and keep it, and only release it out into the market in small quantities.
Could you guys stop being antisemitic for ONE thread????
That wasn't really the point. It's like aetium in mistborn, being the sole owner of such an insanely valuable resource should functionally make you king of the world.
It's a valuable resource but you absolutely don't need it for anything important other than keeping important figures alive via better armour. You can win wars just fine without it, you can grow your economy just fine without it.
Speaking of economy the dwarfs didn't grow their own food imagine the ludicrous markups the merchantment subjected them to.
>mithcal armor thats rily strong
>let's pass through Moria
>well except if Gandalf has something to say about my cousin digging too deep and finding some unholy darkness in the deep of the earth No? Ok off to Moria we go
There was literally no other way that wasn't immediately deadly. He hoped they could sneak through Moria without notice which they essentially did. They made it 99% of the way through, like over 40 miles without problem, then got spotted at the exit.
dont know why you are bothering replying to a baitpost, you're wasting your time
because morons take memes seriously then start propagating them until a ridiculous amount think it's true. Unless someone states the obvious reason it's moronic every time.
Frick off
Gandalf knew what happened to Moria, listen to how he talks about the Balrog he just took the road because he had not other options for the fellowship
gandalf only realised durin's bane was a balrog till he saw it and realised it was a balrog. he previously entered moria and no balrogs tried to kill him and assumed it was safe enough. aragorn also entered moria previously but shat his breeches
Then why did he look so excessively defeated when Frodo chose Moria?
because it's a movie and the audience isn't supposed to know what's going to happen but instead be put into suspense by Gandalf's obvious knowledge of something bad in there
Because he still knows of Durin's Bane.
>wasnt sure if Bilbo's ring was Saurons
>still spent time hunting Gollum before coming back to the Shire and check
what if he found Gollum? Would he have killed him without being certain on the ring?
He did find Gollum, who confirmed he found the ring where Isildur died. It was one piece of the puzzle he put together that was cut from the movie
>movie came out 20 years ago
>There is nearly always a thread of multiple threads about it to this day
Will any movies from the early 2000s have such long lasting appeal to modern audiences?
only other comparable one is harry potter
The Star Wars prequels are probably on the same level too
shut up
The success and popularity of the LOTR movies gives me profound hope that mirrors that of the storyline itself and the redemption of humanity against great evil. I'm sure it sounds gay to say this.
Not gay at all, that's why it resonates so much with people.
Aye twas gay indeed
but it needs to be said
Oil painting posters look so good. I wish they would bring this back. Well, that and good movies.
nowadays they'll have some talentless hacks make similar posters to the old Drew Struzan paintings using photoshop, absolutely disgusting, just take a look at any MCU poster
To be fair, the 90s feel like yesterday.
What did the thousands of goblins eat? Were they feasting on a steady diet of nameless horrors in the dark places of the world?
They did hunting trips during night. Mordor was actually fertile land further east where they grew enormous crops to feed sauron’s armies
>By nightfall these hills will be swarming with Orcs!
Aragorn said they had to high tail it out of there or they'd be Orc food
All is as Eru Ilúvatar wants it
frodo made the decision, watch the movie
LOTR threads are MAX comfy, I love reading all the shit lore anons post. One day I will actually read all the books.
Never matters in a lotr thread. All bait is just an excuse to talk about lotr.
True, you can defeat any and all trolling with the goodness of your heart and unbroken good mood.
I'm pretty sure part of the reason that the "why didn't they just fly the eagles to Mordor" and "what was Aragorn's tax policy" memes refuse to die is that LOTR fans unironically enjoy discussing things like the culture/priorities of the eagles, the state of Mordor's defenses, and the way Aragorn's kingdom would be run post-ROTK.
dont worry next thread I will post the same baitposts
Oi, Valar, turn the lights off I'm trying to sleep here.
Ok, I can understand not taking the eagles to Mount Doom or Mordor, but why not take them from Rivendell to Galadriel's forest?
Saruman would probably use the mountains to kill them all even easier.
>skeletons literally in front of them
>Gimli: A MINE!
was he shortsighted?
he has the eyes of a hawk and the ears of a fox.
does Cinemaphile prefer the theatrical or extended version?
the book
>Die Boken
>Die Boken
God shut the frick up man.
make me israelite
It's "das buch," amerimutt.
go easy on him he's dutch
>Se bōc
it's been decided before, extended fellowship, theatrical tt/rotk are objectively the best
Theatrical by far. Extended has some good stuff but overall adds a lot of bloat, especially in the second and third films.
theatrical cut is perfect. the extended editions are just there for the extra content, they don't enhance the films in anyway.
extended editions are perfect. they enhance the films in every single way
I watch all three extended cuts with my dad every year around Christmas
I bet you do, gay
I'm sorry about your relationship, or lack thereof, with your father, anon
yeah you carry on enjoying that relationship with your father, gay
I heard you were suckin' your dad's wiener the other day.
Even Fellowship theatrical is the best version despite everyone always saying otherwise. I fricking hate Gandalf's awkward dark tongue in Rivendell that comes out of nowhere and is completely unnecessary and just weird as frick. There's some great EE scenes that should've definitely made the cut but they definitely don't outweigh all the moronic shit that shouldnt have been included and was thankfully cut for the theatricak. Also the Rohirim charge in RotK flows a lot better in theatrical, no Gandalf vs Witch King bullshit and there is a cut right after Eowyn screams while charging in her horse in the theateical version that is impossible to not notice should be there but isn't in the EE version. It looks really poorly edited in the EE, as do many other scenes. Don't even get me started on the skull avalanche scene.
I always wonder if somebody's taking the time to figure out how many skulls there are. Seems like hundreds of thousands.
which ever version has the most boromir scenes
Extended edition of Fellowship is a mess- the concerning Hobbits opening with Bilbo as the narrator is just a mess because it focuses on a character you only see for that first 10 minutes of the movie which just starts the whole thing off on the wrong foot. Theatrical opening of Fellowship focusing on Gandalf and Frodo is superb by far.
Extended edition of the other two are better because you get shit that kind of matters like a couple of Faramir's scenes and Saruman's death (fricking criminal they axed that.)
Damn, you mean Saruman doesn't die in the theatre version? He just kind of disappears? It's been so long since I've seen anything but extended I forgot. Always liked just having a longer running time.
He's simply forgotten in the original release.
Some excluded scenes were absolutely vital, i.e. Aragorn and Boromir in Lothlorien, some aren't. If you want the absolutely best version of the films it's somewhere between the theatrical and the extended. I don't think the extended versions are really meant to be better than theatrical, they exist to include everything they feasibly could.
Theres a lot of fluff in the Extended Editions, so theatrical
There are some EE scenes that have never been cut though, like defeated Saruman or Boromir in Osgiliath
Extended because I want to watch Lord of the Rings for as long as possible.
Every change jackson makes to the story and lore is moronic.
why did he hate pippin so much?
pippin got him killed
In the book, Pippin was a kid and Gandalf was more curmudgeonly. So they had a grumpy old man/wise-cracking kid dynamic.
They changed the characters up for the film. All the scenes where Gandalf blew up at Pippin were funny in the book, but kind of weird and uncomfortable in the movie.
tbh I like their movie relationship. It's easy to relate Pippin's mistakes to your own childhood and they have some genuine moments towards the end of the battle at Minas Tirith. Could have used a scene or two more though, Merry and Pippin kind of just exit the movie after the battle is over but IDK how it is in the book.
this is what was missing in Jackson's LOTR
pubes?
Nice fridge does it have a crisp box
was tolkien woke?
faramir makes her cream so hard she becomes a trad hallwife the second she first sees him
That's just how feminists work- they larp as strong women who hate men until one who's man enough can tame them and frick them into submission like I did to mine
prophecies being broken by technical bullshit is a millennia old tradition
>broken
Fulfilled.
seems more transphobic than woke
Yesterday's progressive is today's conservative.
people always forget that in the book Merry stabs the witch king with an Angmar (?) blade or some kind of cursed blade from the Barrow Downs near the Shire/Bree/Old forest or some shit, similar to the evil blade that frodo got stabbed with. So it's like a double prophecy of the Witch King getting shanked by a hobbit with a cursed sword and then zonked by eowyn
Her name is also beautiful
>Setting full of elves, dwarves, hobbits, ents, random monsters, orcs/trolls that make up his army, other Nazgul, and literal demigods
>Somehow thinks a prophecy about not being killed by a human makes him safe
He could have just as easily have been sniped by an arrow from Legolas and then beheaded by Gimli
yeah but he thought he was facing a man. The witch king just spits smack whenever he's about to 1v1.
exactly this, getting such a basic fact wrong in his appraisal of an opponent shook him so bad he was useless afterwards
>woke?
In the book Aragorn basically tells her to go back home and shuts the door on her crush and her reply is
>All your words are but to say: you are a woman, and your part is in the house. But when the men have died in battle and honour, you have leave to be burned in the house, for the men will need it no more. But I am of the House of Eorl and not a serving-woman. I can ride and wield blade, and I do not fear either pain or death.
Which is fairly "woke" if you want to call it that.
But then when she rides off to battle angrily and the Nazgul divebombs Theoden and everyone else has run or died Eowyn is the one that squares up on the Witch King. But she isn't doing it out of bravery or duty. Merry notices. And Tolkien thinks its important enough he tells you twice. Once before the battle
>A young man, Merry thought as he returned the glance, less in height and girth than most. He caught the glint of clear grey eyes; and then he shivered, for it came suddenly to him that it was the face of one without hope who goes in search of death.
And once during the fight with the Witch King
>For into Merry's mind flashed the memory of the face that he saw at the riding from Dunharrow: the face of one that goes seeking death, having no hope. Pity filled his heart..., and suddenly the slow-kindled courage of his race awoke. He clenched his hand. She should not die, so fair, so desperate. At least she should not die alone, unaided.
So for all of Eowyn's posturing she's there not as a brave or dutiful shieldmaiden. She's there because of a deathwish after being scorned by Aragorn. It's Merry (and the Hobbits in general being all about how (You) can be brave without being 6'6'' Numenorean gigachad) who acts out of Bravery to backstab the Witch King even though he was scared so shitless moments before.
Of course none of the nuance about what Eowyn is makes it into the Jackson stuff.
Or how Faramir liking her for who she is saves her from her death wish.
High kino
Peter should have never cut Arwen fighting in Helm's Deep.
If he already made his mind up of including the elves what better way than have Aragorn's waifu fight alongside him?
this was absolutely moronic and i have a lot of respect for Peter Jackson for not being afraid to course correct away from his worst ideas at the last minute
Let us go through the LEGO THE LORD OF THE RINGS: RIVENDELL™ for $499.99
I never understood Lego sets at all when you could you just build whatever you wanted from the bucket or go the Lego store and buy different colors in bulk
imagine being a kid opening christmas presents and you see LEGO LORD OF THE RINGS then you finish unwrapping and its gay ass rivendell
Imagine being a kid and your parents bought you a 6,000 piece LEGO set but they saw assembly was required so they opened it and built it according to the instructions then put it into a cardboard box and wrapped it
it's 40 year old s.o.y boys buying these anon
I like Lego as much as the next guy but who the frick buys this unironically
>mfw no one has ever bought him a gift before in his life and he has no concept of it
That's sad
What kind of kid would want to blow $500 out of his Lego budget on gay-ass Rivendell?
I've seen some of the now defunct old LOTR sets, and they were pretty garbage. Helms Deep. Orthanc. Gandalf's Cart. If Lego makes a new Shire/Bilbo's house, now that would be kino
It's not for kids, it's an 18+ set for mature adults like myself who enjoy scale models
Are you telling me a 14 year old couldn't figure out how to build this
A set of this magnitude takes days to build, a 14 year old would be bored after the first hour
And obviously no kid or teen is gonna spend $500 on a "toy", it's for adult hobbyists with disposable income
Do they sell a sub with it now? Are there even flat pieces in Lego?
here's your sub visiting a shipwreck
>deep explorer
i doubt a 14 year old would be able to afford that kind of top shelf stuff
No, society just doesn't trust 14 year olds to not swallow a lego piece.
Imagine a 17 year old going to buy this at the store and they card him and say he has to leave it behind. Feels bad man.
It's an online purchase exclusive, you don't see that at the stores
> it's an 18+ set for mature adults like myself who enjoy scale models
> it's for adult hobbyists with disposable income
lol gay
Yeah, everyone knows what's disposable income is to be spent on beer and sports bets.
the other LOTR sets on the LEGO site right now are basically lego funko pops so that should tell you
This thing probably costed $10 to produce and $10 to distribute.
>costed
You must of just realized how stupid you are.
They should have made the Mordor gate or Helm's Deep with like 20 elf archers, 40 Uruks, 20 generic Rohan dudes plus all the characters in that battle
>god look at that giant elf b***h fu k id love to just wienerboat her elvish jungle with my huge dwarf wiener frick im hard frick im hard frick i havent bathed in 6 moons shit shit piss man I just wanna cut her up into pieces and fashion a scarf out of her golden locks so I can smell her essence everyday if you know what i mean
What was Galadriel thinking at this moment?
she was so hot
homie I'M COLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I know they couldn't use the eagles to get to Mordor, but why didn't they use the eagles to get over the mountains?
The expedition to Moria basically happened when he was a kid, Erebor heard nothing from Moria for 70+ years and he suggests going there because he unironically believes there's civilization there.
Huh?
I felt really bad for Gimli. I mean, maybe he had a notion that something was wrong at Moria but managed to delude himself that everything was fine. Seeing your cousin and all his people massacred while those ancient halls got turned into a Goblin shithole must have been tough.
My friend got into a bad car wreck and lost a frick ton of his memories including the Lord of the Rings. That lucky frick got to watch it for the first time again.