there's some enjoyable parts but it's legitimately marred with distracting woke casting and woke tropes (dae white men are useless and Black women are beautiful and totally not the plainest and most manly looking version of women?!!). it's a wasted opportunity but the d&d community is pozzed in general so no big surprise
>BLACK PERSON IN A MOVIE? >WOKE!!! WOKE!!! WOKE!!
I like that morons like you are out in the open with this now and not pretending by saying things like "I'm not racist, but" anymore
You have to admit, at one point a character is supposed to be a good member of the villain's race but it has no impact what so ever because one is a black woman and the other is a black male. I think he is supposed to act strange like her (I guess) be it doesn't work at all because of the casting.
Imagine actually being like this in 2023. Everything is exposed now and your denial of reality argument strategy is from about 20 years ago boomer. You must be a sad old b***h.
Never heard of DnD, tried watching it blind.
is right for the most part, the acting, casting choices, and dialogue made it look like the "A Million Ways to Die in the West" for fantasy.
I closed it when they met the thiefling(?) and watched Zoolander instead.
The irony is that those woke tropes are making the "strong women" and the "noble minority" characters extremely one dimensional, boring and annoying.
The only thing anyone remember from this movie is Chris Pine and Hugh Grant characters also maybe the nerdy black guy magician.
>it isnt le kino and i have a large IQ also if people like it they must be dumb
this board is 90% autistics who think they are critics
Like middle aged Karens with yelp and expired coupons, their anoniminity on Cinemaphile has propelled them into thinking they really are in the right when they dont use deoderant and watch my little pony
You do realize that DND was trying to get OUT from under hasbro before this right? This got pushed to hold onto the rights
It was one of the reasons I didn’t go to see it, well that and the israelite writer director saying the vote of the movie is about emasculating the male characters AND casting a bard as your lead and not having him sing a song to save the day.
Why are you still doing this? You know it didn't make any money. It's one of the contenders for biggest flop of the year. Do you really need to make a thread every day?
I don't understand why people pretend this movie is woke. If the characters for the bard (a white man) and the paladin (a black man) were exchanged, people would complain that this was woke because the main character was black. I'm as much of a racist as anyone (e.g. death to all Black folk and israelites), but the "diversity" made sense within the spectrum of each person portrayed by a different race came from a different place in that world. It's like complaining that if you make a movie about a group of people where each is from one continent, that it's an issue they're not all white.
It was a very decent movie, family friendly, with a good message, a relatively wholesome story, that actually made sufficient use of the IP its based on, unlike every single capeshit movie made in the last 20 years except for Iron Man 1. Moreover, the MC redeems himself and becomes of man of honour, which is the opposite of woke (portraying a white man as unsalvagable).
With that said, they should've definitely cast a different girl for the daughter, she was disgustingly muttish.
they gender-swapped the party roles to emasculate the male characters, which they literally told you. all the scenes that lean into their role differences play out like a Scary Movie-style low-brow comedy from 20 years ago lampooning how stupid and overplayed those "subversions" are, yet here they're played straight. because these aren't the creators being clever and doing this because it's so obviously absurd to have the men acting like women that it's funny when you do it, it's the creators showing you exactly what they unironically think about men. and then throw in every single relationship being interracial, random pitch-black Black folks in guard outfits standing right next to start-white euros, etc.; it's so obviously woke you have to be literally blind and deaf to deny it.
>they gender-swapped
I've literally never seen, read, or heard of someone playing as a female bard. Ever. I'm not saying it's not possible, just that stereotypically a bard is a male role. >all the scenes that lean into their role differences play out like a Scary Movie-style low-brow comedy
Which was clearly intentional? The movie is supposed to be funny. You are supposed to laugh. >yet here they're played straight
They're not, maybe except for the druid, which was arguably the eye candy of this movie. >men acting like women
Describe one (1) instance. >throw in every single relationship being interracial
The half-ling played by Bradley Cooper replaces the latina with a q3.14 blue-eyed white woman. If this had been the opposite you would be screaming "WOKE!!!!" but somehow you don't count this as the opposite. >pitch-black Black folks in guard outfits standing right next to start-white euros
In Neverwinter, a city where people from all races canonically go to for a more prosperous life. It's non an ethnostate (unlike Baldur's Gate, in which case I'd agree with you 100%).
I'm not saying this movie isn't "diverse" or that it wouldn't have been better (for me at least) if all the characters were white and attractive instead. But classifying this as "another woke movie" is unfair and disingenuous.
Because it is a well known, verifiable and repeatedly proven and peer reviewed fact, a fundamental basis of reality, an irrefutable truth - that all israelites, without exception, hate white people and want to see them all dead, genocided off of the face of the earth!
israeli movie directors usually do their part in contributing to this shared, ethnic goal of the israeli people, by casting non whites or presenting them in interracial relationships to propagate a genetic dead end to them as a means to genocide them. But what I just explained is merely the tip of the anti-white, loxist iceberg and should be common knowledge.
I wonder if they exchanged those as you suggested the paladin would still be the misunderstood paragon of all good that only the (now black) protag doesn't trust because of his race(!) and also a wise badass that can do no wrong and kills the entire group of evil super assassins alone once before the party flees from them. I'm sorry man, but that stuff was so incredibly on the nose. Like I wanted to like the movie and won't scream "woke, woke, woke" at everything but that they really tried their best to cram all that stuff in there and it's really damn obvious without even looking for it. Another example, I don't even mind stuff like a powerful female character (depending on how it's done and the barbarian woman was fine mostly), but they couldn't even help themselves than to start the movie with a generic girlboss scene where she breaks that new prisoner's legs for (surprise, surprise) wanting to assault her. Among many other things.
Since you use it, can you please explain this meme to me? I know it's supposed to be a "chud", but the character looks as opposite to "white" as it can without being black. >inb4
I'm not white.
Because it is a well known, verifiable and repeatedly proven and peer reviewed fact, a fundamental basis of reality, an irrefutable truth - that all israelites, without exception, hate white people and want to see them all dead, genocided off of the face of the earth!
israeli movie directors usually do their part in contributing to this shared, ethnic goal of the israeli people, by casting non whites or presenting them in interracial relationships to propagate a genetic dead end to them as a means to genocide them. But what I just explained is merely the tip of the anti-white, loxist iceberg and should be common knowledge.
Hello shill-kun, is Paramount still forcing you to try and and make this garbage look good on here? What happened, is it out on Blu-Ray or something now?
And no, we didn’t “pretend” to hate it. We legitimately thought it was crap and forgot about it until you frickers started making twenty threads per day about the damn thing.
Remember when the trailer was so painfully generic that you could predict every plot point, characterisation and character arc so you were never interested?
They made the mistake of playing the jokes in the trailers. A lot of movies mix and match lines and punchlines so that you don't actually hear the way the dialogue plays out and it is still fresh. This was a movie that relied on its humor and it told all its jokes before you got there. + diversity crap which wouldn't have sunk it if not for the humor missteps.
>disingenuous posting
not a good look. they could make an effort to add a drow, halfling, dwarf or actually make the tiefling character look like an actual tiefling.
It fricking sucks. I like the Paladin. The protagonist is basically a sexless homosexual. It's a 3/10 movie. 4/10 if I'm being generous.
It's the first time it's taken me like almost a month to watch a movie. I watched this shit portion by portion, minutes at a time. It really couldn't grab my interest for huge stretches.
I wish the Paladin had more screen time, he was a chad
I was a bit disappointed that he didn't show up during the final battle
I thought the movie was good though
The movie was good, it feels like it was actually made by and for D&D players
The part where they use the portal-staff to turn a painting into a portable hole is exactly the sort of thing that a group of players would come up with as a plan
this doesn't look like it'd be even kinda good. i dont care about the casting or anything it just doesn't look interesting, unique, or well crafted in the slightest
there's some enjoyable parts but it's legitimately marred with distracting woke casting and woke tropes (dae white men are useless and Black women are beautiful and totally not the plainest and most manly looking version of women?!!). it's a wasted opportunity but the d&d community is pozzed in general so no big surprise
>BLACK PERSON IN A MOVIE?
>WOKE!!! WOKE!!! WOKE!!
I like that morons like you are out in the open with this now and not pretending by saying things like "I'm not racist, but" anymore
i don't consider anything i said racist, though.
>BLACK PERSON IN A MOVIE?
>>WOKE!!! WOKE!!! WOKE!!
This but unironically. Why are you so angry about it?
I'm sorry, not everyone has to celebrate blacks in movies they are clearly forced in for diversity points
You have to admit, at one point a character is supposed to be a good member of the villain's race but it has no impact what so ever because one is a black woman and the other is a black male. I think he is supposed to act strange like her (I guess) be it doesn't work at all because of the casting.
>one is a black woman and the other is a black male.
one is a white woman and the other is a black male
That's a light skinned black woman with contacts.
Imagine actually being like this in 2023. Everything is exposed now and your denial of reality argument strategy is from about 20 years ago boomer. You must be a sad old b***h.
There's always one seething troony per thread on thia board
Never heard of DnD, tried watching it blind.
is right for the most part, the acting, casting choices, and dialogue made it look like the "A Million Ways to Die in the West" for fantasy.
I closed it when they met the thiefling(?) and watched Zoolander instead.
The black wizard was easily the most useless one.
>dae white men are useless
There is literally a character who is actually useless and it's a whole plot point and they are not a white man
>they
kys
The irony is that those woke tropes are making the "strong women" and the "noble minority" characters extremely one dimensional, boring and annoying.
The only thing anyone remember from this movie is Chris Pine and Hugh Grant characters also maybe the nerdy black guy magician.
Yes, everybody else is always wrong and never you, you read about it on Cinemaphile after all.
>everybody else is always wrong
Your troony fantasy bombed.
Cinemaphile pretends most things are bad because
>it isnt le kino and i have a large IQ also if people like it they must be dumb
this board is 90% autistics who think they are critics
Like middle aged Karens with yelp and expired coupons, their anoniminity on Cinemaphile has propelled them into thinking they really are in the right when they dont use deoderant and watch my little pony
>kino
>Karens
christ, have a nice day already you fricking homosexual
lol, have a struck a nerve?
Tbh its not wrong, most of the posters here a like watching a personal zoo of autistics trying to fight over a grapefruit because
"le banana isnt kino"
And if you dont understand this metaphore then you are in too deep dude,
Ive watched this board turn absolutely moronic in the last 10 years.
m00t should return and deal with all you candy-asses lol
moot is too busy supplicating himself before the altar of feminism to deal with anything other than a strap-on
lol, you just googled m00t didnt you?
no, is that what comes up when you do?
shit im pretty on point with the zeitgeist then.
how awful.
you spelled m00t wrong, so no,
you are whats known to the locals here as a summergay
you really need that explained to you?
this is pathetic.
sounds like you have missed the mark here champ
No, I was packing the the bags for mr. Luggage Lad, while you were still making up new genders on Tumblr.
>have a struck a nerve?
nope, you just sound like a tool
>I'm actually smart and critical because I like modern trash
kek imagine this being your actual argument what a fricking turbo loser
No. That movie was before my time. I came here for Fish Tank threads.
It's not offensively bad but it's nowhere near the kino that r*ddit and moronic zoomers seem to think it is. 6/10 at best.
Zoomers don't care about D&D
it didnt have subway surfers running underneath and didnt finish after 30secs
It bombed.
Sorry not sorry.
my man it made money,
it will prob get a sequel
You do realize that DND was trying to get OUT from under hasbro before this right? This got pushed to hold onto the rights
It was one of the reasons I didn’t go to see it, well that and the israelite writer director saying the vote of the movie is about emasculating the male characters AND casting a bard as your lead and not having him sing a song to save the day.
its not that deep my man,
just watch the movie and have fun
you fricking autist
Make me
Why are you still doing this? You know it didn't make any money. It's one of the contenders for biggest flop of the year. Do you really need to make a thread every day?
It was an extremely mediocre movie. Not as bad as I was expecting, but it was not good in any sense of the word. I didn't finish it.
Not enough monke armpit shots
it's a boring and unfunny waste of time i would have rather watched paint dry
it was aight
too bad we only got to see her armpits once or twice
remember when OP was not a homosexual? me neither
wokeshit = bad = didn't watch
stay mad, shill
that tiefling girl was hot as frick other than that it was 6/10
No. I do remember the blatant shill threads though
I don't understand why people pretend this movie is woke. If the characters for the bard (a white man) and the paladin (a black man) were exchanged, people would complain that this was woke because the main character was black. I'm as much of a racist as anyone (e.g. death to all Black folk and israelites), but the "diversity" made sense within the spectrum of each person portrayed by a different race came from a different place in that world. It's like complaining that if you make a movie about a group of people where each is from one continent, that it's an issue they're not all white.
It was a very decent movie, family friendly, with a good message, a relatively wholesome story, that actually made sufficient use of the IP its based on, unlike every single capeshit movie made in the last 20 years except for Iron Man 1. Moreover, the MC redeems himself and becomes of man of honour, which is the opposite of woke (portraying a white man as unsalvagable).
With that said, they should've definitely cast a different girl for the daughter, she was disgustingly muttish.
they gender-swapped the party roles to emasculate the male characters, which they literally told you. all the scenes that lean into their role differences play out like a Scary Movie-style low-brow comedy from 20 years ago lampooning how stupid and overplayed those "subversions" are, yet here they're played straight. because these aren't the creators being clever and doing this because it's so obviously absurd to have the men acting like women that it's funny when you do it, it's the creators showing you exactly what they unironically think about men. and then throw in every single relationship being interracial, random pitch-black Black folks in guard outfits standing right next to start-white euros, etc.; it's so obviously woke you have to be literally blind and deaf to deny it.
>they gender-swapped
I've literally never seen, read, or heard of someone playing as a female bard. Ever. I'm not saying it's not possible, just that stereotypically a bard is a male role.
>all the scenes that lean into their role differences play out like a Scary Movie-style low-brow comedy
Which was clearly intentional? The movie is supposed to be funny. You are supposed to laugh.
>yet here they're played straight
They're not, maybe except for the druid, which was arguably the eye candy of this movie.
>men acting like women
Describe one (1) instance.
>throw in every single relationship being interracial
The half-ling played by Bradley Cooper replaces the latina with a q3.14 blue-eyed white woman. If this had been the opposite you would be screaming "WOKE!!!!" but somehow you don't count this as the opposite.
>pitch-black Black folks in guard outfits standing right next to start-white euros
In Neverwinter, a city where people from all races canonically go to for a more prosperous life. It's non an ethnostate (unlike Baldur's Gate, in which case I'd agree with you 100%).
I'm not saying this movie isn't "diverse" or that it wouldn't have been better (for me at least) if all the characters were white and attractive instead. But classifying this as "another woke movie" is unfair and disingenuous.
have sex, schizo chud
I wonder if they exchanged those as you suggested the paladin would still be the misunderstood paragon of all good that only the (now black) protag doesn't trust because of his race(!) and also a wise badass that can do no wrong and kills the entire group of evil super assassins alone once before the party flees from them. I'm sorry man, but that stuff was so incredibly on the nose. Like I wanted to like the movie and won't scream "woke, woke, woke" at everything but that they really tried their best to cram all that stuff in there and it's really damn obvious without even looking for it. Another example, I don't even mind stuff like a powerful female character (depending on how it's done and the barbarian woman was fine mostly), but they couldn't even help themselves than to start the movie with a generic girlboss scene where she breaks that new prisoner's legs for (surprise, surprise) wanting to assault her. Among many other things.
>where she breaks that new prisoner's legs
It wasn't any prisoner, it was an ogre... you know... the actual stand-in for blacks in the fantasy genre.
*orc
I loved it
It was good, but casting choices are questionable
>B-b-but there were brown people in it and it's setting is inspired by medieval Europe or something, that's literally genocide!!!
Since you use it, can you please explain this meme to me? I know it's supposed to be a "chud", but the character looks as opposite to "white" as it can without being black.
>inb4
I'm not white.
it was one sperg
Why does the last name of the director matter?
Because it is a well known, verifiable and repeatedly proven and peer reviewed fact, a fundamental basis of reality, an irrefutable truth - that all israelites, without exception, hate white people and want to see them all dead, genocided off of the face of the earth!
israeli movie directors usually do their part in contributing to this shared, ethnic goal of the israeli people, by casting non whites or presenting them in interracial relationships to propagate a genetic dead end to them as a means to genocide them. But what I just explained is merely the tip of the anti-white, loxist iceberg and should be common knowledge.
yadda yadda yadda
Hello shill-kun, is Paramount still forcing you to try and and make this garbage look good on here? What happened, is it out on Blu-Ray or something now?
And no, we didn’t “pretend” to hate it. We legitimately thought it was crap and forgot about it until you frickers started making twenty threads per day about the damn thing.
>paladin built for BWC
homie lookin zesty
He may walk straight but he don't frick straight
I remember everything.
No, when did that happen?
They’re just a bunch of pathetic racists OP. I actually liked it a lot.
Remember when the trailer was so painfully generic that you could predict every plot point, characterisation and character arc so you were never interested?
All I remember from the trailer is thinking "neat, I'll watch this once I can download it in 4K through XDCC", which I did.
It was one of the better movies this year.
The humour was on point and the action was pretty good.
Even Kojima liked it.
They made the mistake of playing the jokes in the trailers. A lot of movies mix and match lines and punchlines so that you don't actually hear the way the dialogue plays out and it is still fresh. This was a movie that relied on its humor and it told all its jokes before you got there. + diversity crap which wouldn't have sunk it if not for the humor missteps.
>The architecture is inspired by parts of the real world
>Therefore, the people living in this fantasy world must match the people who lived there
This is the dumbest fricking shit you /misc/ folks come up with.
There are no socialists in fantasy, so there are no non-whites, simple as.
Bernie lost.
>demoralizationimage12(renamebeforeposting).png
I don't get this comic, why is the arab on the left seething at the black on the right?
it's a massive strawman anyway. instead, fantasy should be more or less consistent with the medieval europe of myths
>why can't x be y
because then it would y not x
>for absolutely no reason
>it clearly reads dungeons & dragons
Remember when this was relentless shilled here non-stop and still flopped?
I hate everything modern, OP.
>d&d
>every character is a human, even the tiefling is human
it's bad for that reason alone
Frick off furry, your type ruined adventuring parties
>disingenuous posting
not a good look. they could make an effort to add a drow, halfling, dwarf or actually make the tiefling character look like an actual tiefling.
Wow 4 black individuals in 500 years of knights. You were knights n shieet.
GTFO with your shit.
These are all representations of Saint Maurice, or Mauritius, the Moor.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saint_Maurice
First half was a slog but got better when they went on an actual adventure and heist in the 2nd half
I couldn't make it though this movie. Stopped watching half way though and can't bring myself to go back and finish it.
It fricking sucks. I like the Paladin. The protagonist is basically a sexless homosexual. It's a 3/10 movie. 4/10 if I'm being generous.
It's the first time it's taken me like almost a month to watch a movie. I watched this shit portion by portion, minutes at a time. It really couldn't grab my interest for huge stretches.
I wish the Paladin had more screen time, he was a chad
I was a bit disappointed that he didn't show up during the final battle
I thought the movie was good though
The movie was good, it feels like it was actually made by and for D&D players
The part where they use the portal-staff to turn a painting into a portable hole is exactly the sort of thing that a group of players would come up with as a plan
Chuds hate most everything, their opinions are copy pasted from rightarded blogs.
I thought it was pretty funny.
Sophia Lillis has cute ears.
Just don't look up her wikifeet
>Paramount is still trying to shill this slop
Keep begging, homosexuals
It didn't have nearly enough hairy armpit shots.
I watched this, Decision to Leave, 8½ and Picnic at Hanging Rock sequentially and I enjoyed all of them.
>Ctrl + f
>"woke"
>1 of 20
All the posts with that word are literally praising it and saying the movie isn't that, pay more attention zoomer
this doesn't look like it'd be even kinda good. i dont care about the casting or anything it just doesn't look interesting, unique, or well crafted in the slightest
Is this '/tv/' in the room with us now?