>thorin dead
>two more dwarves dead
>Laketown utterly destroyed by Smaug
>elf b***h doesn't get manlet boyfriend
>Bilbo's house is looted
This isn't much of a happy ending
The Hobbit
>thorin dead
>two more dwarves dead
>Laketown utterly destroyed by Smaug
>elf b***h doesn't get manlet boyfriend
>Bilbo's house is looted
This isn't much of a happy ending
I watched the 1977 animated movie today.
I've seen people endlessly debate over what was the fifth army, but this movie straight up tells you it was the eagles. This should be brought up more often.
Five armies. I'm counting. Yeah it must've been the Eagles
huh
I’m watching Desolation rn
Also there is NO REASON why the eagles couldn’t have dropped them off at the Lonely Mountain
would have saved them like a year of travel
The scenes with Smaug are really cool in that movie.
Smaug was a buffoon and the speed of his lips moving without making thunderous plapping sounds was cartoonish
I think that anon was talking about the cartoon but he has scaly, dry Komodo dragon lips, not drooling, slapping Black person lips
He was cool and soundtrack was nice with him
I thought Bilbo could only understand Smaug because he wore the Ring, like with the spiders earlier. We are hearing Smaug from Bilbo’s perspective, so it’s possible there were nasty sounds that we aren’t hearing.
Prolly gonna watch it when I’m done with the Jackson trilogies.
I find them quite cozy
>Also there is NO REASON why the eagles couldn’t have dropped them off at the Lonely Mountain
The Lord of the Eagles would not take them anywhere near where men lived.
“They would shoot at us with their great bows of yew,” he said, “for they would
think we were after their sheep. And at other times they would be right. No! we
are glad to cheat the goblins of their sport, and glad to repay our thanks to you,
but we will not risk ourselves for dwarves in the southward plains.”
they skip over the scene in the book where the Dwarves asks them.
But the King of Eagles is a massive butthole and says he only saved them because he owed Gandalf a debt, and now that debt has been paid.
oglaf com/ornithology/
That's another instance of Jackson compressing the scale of Middle Earth for a visual.
He did it so relentlessly in lotr, eg showing barad dur and mt doom right next to each other and both seemingly just the other side of the spooky mountains visible from minas tirith, that when I read the books a few years after the movies came out I was amazed at how far apart everything actually was.
He wanted a visual of the Dwarfs' eventual goal to close the movie on, but it makes the eagles look like petty homosexuals with lame excuses for leaving them west of the incredibly dangerous Mirkwood.
There are countless other examples, usually offscreen, like the elves beating the orcs to Helm's deep despite coming from much further away and presumably starting after learning that the orcs were on the move, or Frodo and Sam's little detour to Osgiliath that should put them many days off course.
What was really insulting was the little thrush that flies by them in the end and zips over to the mountain in like 20 seconds. Eagles, come on lads…
It doesn't quite seem like the mountain would be visible from the edge of the misty mountains where they were dropped off.
>Denethor's run mirrors Frodo's journey
BRAVO JACKSON!
k-kino
It must've hurt
Fun fact: In Jackson’s first draft of RotK, Gollum doesn’t get shoved by Frodo into the Crack of Doom. He gets tackled in by a flaming Denethor who has run all the way from Minas Tirith.
lmfao
That's a big forest.
I thought so too, but in Middle Earth most of the world is uninhabited, so huge forests spanning most of it makes sense.
IIRC some of it is Thranduil's kingdom so he prolly likes it nice and woody everywhere.
For yew.
lel
Thū would fit better, but that's the autist in me.
Bilbo could see a hint of snow on the Lonely Mountain when he looked back from the Misty Mountains in the last chapter. However, this could have been an error by Tolkien.
Such a comfy and nice map, more whimsical and carefree than the dour LOTR map. I sometimes wish Tolkien had given us a few more short, self-contained adventure stories in Middle Earth instead of the grand and cosmic stuff.
The shire looks much more wooded than I would expect.
Tolkien drew it like a comfy neighborhood
how do we go back, bros?
You know how.
compression happens in all movies
i like the animated version more because it kills another 4 dwarves
Hey, cool it with the antisemitism.
Okay smart guy, which are the titular Two Towers?
Spoiler: It's actually Orthanc and Cirith Ungol
Wrong, it’s Orthanc and Minas Morgul. Tolkien agreed, don’t bother him about it.
This looks like one of those meme image macros or youtube thumbnails with the significant information in a red circle. Tolkien was truly ahead of his time.
KEK I literally thought that’s what it was and I was like what am I supposed to be seeing in the circle? Elvish writing or some shit?
I think it's supposed to be the moon?
The moon? It’s not the fricking Ring??
I watched it two days ago. I liked it. Better than Peter Jackson. The music was hokey, but needed more whole rests!
Hokey music???
Not the Hobbit. That was their adaptation of Return of the King. The Hobbit 77's soundtrack was a bunch of acoustic/bass guitar folk tracks.
I think it was awesome.
In the book, it's the wargs
I'm supposed to believe that a bunch of flocking bird-brained eagles can form an 'army'? Oh crow up. Owl believe it when I see pigs fly. That'd be a hoot.
Eagles in Tolkien's book were as smart as humans, could speak and had names. Movies did them dirty.
>Eagles in Tolkien's book were as smart as humans, could speak
So could the thrushes, mind. It was the thrushes, not the goddam glory hog eagles, that saved the day.
so why aren't thrushes used as spies for humans and elves? They'd certainly treat them better than orcs would so it would be in their interest to serve them.
A thrush told Bard where to shoot the Black Arrow.
Try reading the book, honestly. It's a joy.
>So began a battle that none had expected; and it was called the Battle of Five Armies, and it was very terrible. Upon one side were the Goblins and the wild Wolves, and upon the other were Elves and Men and Dwarves.
The cartoon says the goblins were riding the wolves.
battle of the five hundred tiny specks
Tonal implications of Bilbo intentionally ducking the battle, lying about it, and generally seeing no connection between himself and the battle even though people he cares about are dying?
It's like Token didn't want us taking the fantasy seriously even then.
The 77 movie is good.
>78 min
>Covers almost the entire book
>Memorable songs
Add in the Beorn scene and its perfect
you actually watched the third hobbit movie? why?
Because it's a good trilogy but the ending kind of sad.
No it isn’t.
Everyone is dead and what's left is demolished by dragon and orcs. How is that not sad?
Its not good, you dumb frick.
It is
No, no it fricking isnt. Its an abomination. Its a pile of shit with an awful script, awful characters, awful characterizations, awful pandering and awful visuals. The cgi is beyond shit and del taco is a c**t for making jackson finish the films.
You're mad for using such harsh language
Nah, youre just a dickless americ**t that cant handle "harsh language". have a nice day paedophile.
Anyway, they're good movies. That's why people are making threads about them
>people
Nope. 1 person.
The archives are a thing you stupid c**t.
And plugins show the ips. Youre not fooling anyone troon.
>And plugins show the ips
>plugins
orly?
There isnt a conspiracy against you
>repeats self in face of external stimuli
you are certainly on the spectrum. I'd feel bad for calling you a moron since obviously your mom had you too late in life.
You don't have to be rude.
>Eurotorah seething about America
Lel
>The cgi is beyond shit
>del taco is a c**t for making jackson finish the films.
These two points are pretty much undeniable, the scene where Legolas "runs up falling rocks midair" was so moronic.
It is a shame the orcs were animated and not actors. But what's wrong with Legolas doing Legolas things?
>But what's wrong with Legolas doing Legolas things?
basic physics
What is the difference between Legolas skateboarding around arching orcs vs leaping on falling rocks.
Suspension of disbelief, one occurred in a good movie, the other occurred in a shitty movie.
The skateboarding was bad but it wasn't as completely gratuitous as some of his other stunts even in those movies. The scene at least created a need for him to get down those steps urgently and arrive with a bang. If he hadn't been shooting arrows on the way down there really wouldn't have been anything wrong with it. Later editions of shounen Legolas are completely unnecessary visual fluff.
He always did mcu tier shit ya crabby c**ts, after that elephant takedown in rotk you should be able to just accept he can do anything and stfu.
The first anime shit Legolas does is mounting the cave troll, which is at least somewhat justified. The elephant takedown is a literal cutscene that does nothing but provide a goofy spectacle.
Stfu gay
no
>:(
Feats of athletic ability, such as riding a shield down a staircase or climbing up the elephant in RotK, are cool.
Ignoring physics though is stupid, such as having magnets on his boots while sliding down the elephants trunk in RotK or the way he mounts his horse during the warg attack in TT.
I can do that. Mid tier cossack stuff
Orlando Bloom can't, though
I find that less offensive than the shield or the oliphaunt.
He defies physics within 30 minutes of existing in the movie.
He's just been trained to resist the cold. No different than Army Rangers or Navy Seals.
He's walking on top of the snow.
Good boots.
you mean they are cgislop
was meant for
I loved the first 2 but when Hobbit 3 came out I thought it was trash, but in hindsight, it was only because the dragon gets killed 3 minutes in, there was no reason all the dragon stuff couldn’t have been consolidated and been cool and climactic in the second movie, chopping off 2 minutes of dragon and pasting it onto the third movie was ridiculous but now that the dust has settled and you can just binge these and watch them back to back who cares. But at the time that felt like a kick in the balls to have hyped up Smaug in 3 and having him on the poster but he wasn’t even in the movie, but like I said now? who cares, it’s kino
After watching it again, Smaug isn't killed off too quickly. More like 20 minutes rather than 3. And he does a lot of damage. It was still disappointing to see him die to one arrow
I expected him to die in 1 arrow, that wasn’t the problem. If all that happened at the end of 2 it would have been fine. I thought it was cool how Smaug was virtually invincible but had the Achilles heel of the black arrow loosening that scale making him vulnerable but only in that one tiny spot, all that IMO was kino how dragons could only be harmed by special magic dragon forged ballistics. IMO Smaug is easily the coolest dragon in movies
What would a dragon need gold for?
It’s not spelled out enough for you? To make others seethe. Smaug’s mere existence caused middle earth to cower in fear and endlessly seethe that he was hoarding all the wealth. Smaug just wants to smugly slumber in his amassed riches and revel in everyone else’s demise.
>she doesn't know
So what’s the joke here? The comic seems to portray the dragon as in the wrong but he’s just stating facts.
the knight is a metaphor for the moronic author
Joke?
I’m just saying the knight walking away implied the dragon was an insane moron but everything he said was just things that are happening IRL.
is the joke that the dragon is insane?
This seems like a leftoid comic so that’s what I glean from it. If the dragon was supposed to be portrayed as reasonable the knight probably would say “man I thought dragons were evil!” or something at the end instead of exasperatingly leaving. I’m thinking too much about it out of boredom.
>the knight probably would say “man I thought dragons were evil!”
politics aside this made me laugh, i think it would be a good punchline either way
>insane moron
sounds about right
here's one for you then
>life isnt about getting the most money
>after lecturing the dragon about not making his money work for him buy starting several businesses.
What a moronic comic.
A better argument would be that having a giant pile of gold doesn't make you rich, becauseits just a pile of metal. Having access to luxuries and services is what makes you rich.
That pile of metal would give him access to all luxuries and services. Its literally an entire kingdoms treasury. I get the point that its just metal that doesnt do anything, except that it does do something. Its traded for things.
he's just waxing philosophy
its like a tree falls in the forest kind of argument
but it is a little bit of an interesting thought that the worlds billionaires only hold any wealth because of everyone else's consensus that their currency holds value
Most super wealthy people don't actually have full access to their money, like when people say "Elon Musk is a billionaire" he doesn't actually check his bank account on his phone and it says "$1,000,000,0000,000" it's money all over the place and in asset, he could probably spend 1 billion dollars if he went through every single one of his israelite lawyers and accountants and bank reps and company managers etc, but he doesn't actually have 1 billion dollars.
You think he'd give me 500k if I asked
Elon might because he's an Autistic troll or he'd call you a pedo lover.
dragons can't very well walk into a village and buy stuff though. Why would they in the first place, anything they want is freely available with minimal effort. Fat DnD movie dragons make complete sense.
this. dragons don't care about luxuries like humans do. to them the apex of luxury is sitting on your fat pile of gold while terrorizing mortals if the dragon is evil or philosophizing if he's not
So where are the female dragons?
Dragons inhabit the north.
Shit take on Buffet investment advice, Smaug will live 1000s of years and gold and land are the only assets proven to hold their value over such a long period of time IF you can maintain control over them. Hell most empires only last around 300 years, even the biggest companies are lucky to last a few decades.
Smaug controls enough gold that his death instantly causes an all out civil war between 5 different races over who controls it.
Imagine if at the end of ww2 a war broke out between America, the UK, France and the soviets over Hitler gold stash.
nobody likes a homosexual schizo rambling
>So what’s the joke here? The comic seems to portray the dragon as in the wrong but he’s just stating facts.
t. KKK Grand Dragon
too bad you cant see me leaving this conversation
give me your gold, dragon
I look like and say this
He's seen better days
>paranoid villain spouting off about zionists
hits too close to home
But gold is in fact worth more than the plummeting value of the American dollar and zionist bankers are consolidating and hoarding all wealth. Those are good guys to you and people who buy gold are villains? idgi
>But gold is in fact worth more than the plummeting value of the American dollar and zionist bankers are consolidating and hoarding
I had a guy come buy some old computer stuff off Craigslist. Whole time he was looking at this stuff he was talking about Rothchilds and Soros and shit. When he was leaving he handed me a card and said "We live in uncertain times, you gotta be prepared." This card had three websites on it. One was some standard Breitbart type news site. The other two were full 1990s-type schizo sites about government weather control and colloidal silver and statanic subliminal messages and all that fun stuff.
Did you thank him for caring enough to share with you?
i still don't get the soros thing
>i still don't get the soros thing
are u fricking dumb mate? google his life. he runs the Open Society Foundation. google that too.
schizo meltdown
The Koch Brothers aren't real.
>he's not woke on the fed or the israeli question
>he doesnt knoew
I'm going to frick that dragon
Anti semites are literally mindless objectively evil animals.
t. fierce advocate for trans kids
don't you ever get tired of sucking dick all day long everyday and yet be considered a second class israeli person?
seriously, they ain't gonna give you a rise any time soon and you are barely above the average goyim for them, if all the goys dissapeared, you will be considered a goy, because you are the lowest of the lowest, disspossable, and will never be a really equal israeli for them.
The greenback has wealth because people want it
It doesn't need gold to give it value, it has value by existing
>you are a paranoid conspiracy theorist for swapping your rapidly devaluing currency for precious metals that barely fluctuate at all in value and are universally accepted forms of currency.
Okay.
The same reason why ravens and other birds will hoard shiny things.
It's just in his nature
Its a metal that melts easily so its very comfortable for them to lay in, like laying on a big blanket
To buy stuff from the orc menu
He’s a greedy c**t that can never have enough. This is one reason why the adaption is so goddamn stupid when it comes to Bilbo’s conversation with him.
The whole point in the book is that he takes a single gold cup from the hoard, and this makes Smaug so fricking assmad that he sets out to exterminate laketown simply for helping out someone who stole a completely insignificant trinket. The only reason he even entertained the idea of talking to Bilbo is because he wanted to lure him out and barbecue him, and he only kept talking once that failed because he couldn’t figure out what the frick he was.
If Bilbo had taken off the ring in sight of Smaug, he’d have been dead in an instant. He nearly was anyway
Heat sink.
Dragons hoard treasure not because they need it but because they can
occasionally, it makes crunchy, tasty adventurers come to your own home like some medieval grubhub
the Talmud compels him.
how did he achieve this?
loyalty to morgoth
it's a detect invisibility spell but with two flashlights coming out of your eyeballs
me looking down my waitress’s shirt when she’s trying to take my order
You should not be a pervert in public. It makes me people uncomfortable
A man being sexually attracted to a woman's body is not perverse at all.
Cool it with the antisemitism.
>elf b***h doesn't get manlet boyfriend
Non canon cash grab movie slop. Kys homosexual.
>>elf b***h doesn't get manlet boyfriend
This is a good thing. The idea of them procreating is revolting. A dwarf-elf hybrid? It's as gross as that gadget mouse-fly israeli bestiality shit Seth rogen shat out.
Wait a minute.
>Thorin dead
>Two dwarves dead
>That's a party of 10 not 13
>They give my boy Bilbo a fricking 13th of the booty and not a 10th
THOSE FRICKING DWARVEN israeliteS.
Bilbo took his part before those parties had died thus the contract isn't violated
kek, read the fine print Bilbgoy Chuddins
>1/14th of the plunder if any goes to you
didn’t say shit about anyone dying and Thorin taking their cut
Why shouldn't the dead dwarve's surviving family get his share?
Cause they're losers. Sad.
you entered to contract with a certain amount of shares you didn't even try to negotiate so why are you angry after the fact.
>t. Dwarf
You wanna cum for mommy? You like the feeling of mommy's hands on wiener? Do you like looking at my breasts while I jerk off your wiener?
I thought it was a hobbit hole breakfast from the thumbnail
What was it? A super Smaug sandwich and a dwarf shit blast apple pie?
You mean this.
I really don't think Bard was drinking pumpkin pie milkshakes.
You don't know that for certain.
No I thought it was a picture of an actual hobbit hole breakfast, like someone went to dennys and took a picture of one
If you want I can make you one.
>Those prices
God wtf happened
voting for our economic interests
I mean it would make more sense for a dragon to have a pile of pancakes and bacon is all I'm saying
Nice digits.
Smaug needs a burger with some protein. How do you think he likes it cooked: well, rare, or medium?
Dropped by eagles into the volcano
And served on Lurtz's Maggoty Bread™ Brioche Bun
>chips not in the form of golden coins
>not piling the pancakes to resemble a hobbit mound home
Come on now
Too much for Mexican immigrant workers
comfy
>The greatest adventure is what lies ahead.
>Today and tomorrow are yet to be said.
>The chances, the changes are all yours to make.
>The mold of your life is in your hands to break.
I wish I would have taken these lyrics to heart when I watched it as a kid. I wasted years having an external locus of control.
I did but only because it's an unusual turn of phrase to a 90s kid
before 10 it wasn't clear whether 'mold' and 'mould' were the same word and how all their various meanings fit together.
>I'm wondering if another dragon is really the answer we need
I don't understand why Hacksons movie had the eleven and dwarves fighting
Never happened in the book
Those movies padded out every conceivable thing they could from a short children's book. Instead of 3 LOTR and 3 Hobbit should have been 4 LOTR and one long Hobbit movie.
Should've been 6 LotR (2 movies per book each 3 hours long)
>18 hours of LOTR
I'm a bookgay and I still don't think I could have handled that much.
LotR is made up of 6 books anyways
The division of Fellowship/Towers/Return was just a publisher decision but each volume contains 2 books
There was a paper shortage at the time.
no, Tolkein wanted one big book.
I always thought the hobbit should have been done as a single CGI animated film the same way as the tintin movie. Would have been able to keep all the actors returning from LOTR but added a different feel to it so it wouldn't have just felt like the LOTR prequel that we got
That would have sucked I’m glad we have 6 kino LOTR movies.
>Would have been able to keep all the actors returning from LOTR but added a different feel to it so it wouldn't have just felt like the LOTR prequel that we got
If Del Toro had actually stuck with the project for once, he probably would've given a suitably different feel to the Hobbit films while still using the same actors/props/locations to keep continuity
reposting
>>elf b***h doesn't get manlet boyfriend
Head canon. That's not even a thing.
's house is looted
It isn't. he arrives just in time and tells everyone to frick off.
So how was Ironfoot supposed to be Oakenshield's cousin?
>Groin
>Groin
I bet he was one crotchety dwarf!
>Carlos turns out to be an actual esl
Impressive,
Dain's grandfather was a sibling of Thorin's grandfather, Thror. Also, Dain was the one to rule Erebor after the battle of five armies.
>Dwarves are fat and heavy drinkers yet live for hundreds of years
sunlight bad
mountain good
built different
They were second cousins, it’s right on there.
>Groin
Can’t believe it took me years to realize how silly Gloin’s father’s name is. I think the accent mark threw me off.
Minum grynde.
Any type of more distant relationship automatically turns you into cousins.
So that opens up the opportunity for wincest?
No, "wyrms."
From early German "wurmiz."
"Dragons" or "draco" are sea serpents.
The oldest recorded use of the Greek "drakon" explicitly refers to snake related, though drakon was later used to refer to what we now call pythons.
>elf friend
So can gimli say the elf n word?
Nelf?
why did those shitty movies make smaug a wyvern?
dragons have four limbs + wings, not 2 legs and 2 wings w/ claws
He was pretty dragon like
kinda ruins Skyrim too doesn't it?
>"He is dovahkiin Wyvernborn!"
doesn't really work
Could have been avoided by simply maling them proper dragons instead of the lazy design they used.
you are gay and not smart
>dragons have four limbs
According to dnd.
You're a fricking moron.
according to the author himself actually
why don't you just stfu?
>elf b***h doesn't get manlet boyfriend
filler fanfic nonsense
watching this hobbit animated film as a baby with my father made me want to learn to read so I could read the book. finished it before I started first grade. thanks dad.
It's been a while since I've read the book, could anyone refresh my memory? Bilbo tells Gandalf about the ring after the battle of the five armies right? Why didn't Gandalf look into it immediately?
I don’t think he mentions the Ring but I’m watching now I’ll get back to you.
He means the book. Remember at the end of the movie Gandalf calls out Bilbo for thinking he was hiding the ring from him when he in fact knew the whole time. However, he just calls it a magic ring.
I dont think Gandalf knows shit about The Ring, in fellowship he had to go read about the Ring because he was like, there’s no way Bilbo’s stupid ring is the one Ring…. right???
That's what it seems like. I guess magic rings are common enough for him to not give it a second thought.
there are. gandalf says so, 'there are many magic rings in this world, and none of them are to be used lightly. in fellowship, bilbo's struggle to give up the ring is what sets him off, and causes gandalf to go to minas tirith and look it up. in the book, he's gone like 20 years researching the one ring
Exactly, he thinks Bilbo just found some magic ring but starts getting suspicious when he arrives for Bilbo's birthday party and sees he hasn't aged a day in like 75 years, and seeing the power it holds over him when asked to relinquish it. Then he goes to the archives in Minas Tirith for a few years studying just to be sure and figures it out. The exposition of Gandalf slowly realising it is the one ring in the Jackson film is actually pretty well done.
You don't suppose if Gandalf knew the ring came from gollum he would've been more suspicious earlier?
Why? He wouldn't have a clue who the frick gollum was until it becomes pertinent when he learns that gollum knows who Bilbo is, where he lives and that he has the one ring and has been captured by Sauron. But before that he's just some weird cave creature obsessed with a random magic ring.
dead
Died reclaiming his ancestral home. Best ending for a dwarf
>>two more dwarves dead
Least dwarven looking dwarves (one of them didn’t even have a beard) died. This is a good thing
utterly destroyed by Smaug
They rebuilt it with the dwarf gold and they could now have proper trade without the dragon
>>elf b***h doesn't get manlet boyfriend
Deserved for being where she don’t belong
's house is looted
Dude has got enough gold to buy the entire Shire and still be richer than all other hobbits combined
The last one would cause catastrophic inflation and destroy the Shire's economy. Bilbo wielded the economic red button for the remainder of his life in Hobbiton, in addition to the greatest of the rings of power.
Such is the reward for leaving his armchair to go on an epic quest against dragons and orcs.
what was smaug's tax policy?
?si=Dvix1EKNEsS63ZDL
>Slowly the shares turned sour...
>and the watchful IRS closed in.
>Thror's love of unreported income had grown too fierce.
>Antisemitism had begun to grow within him.
>He was rolling his overhead into next quarter.
>And where unreported income thrives...
>Auditors will follow...
>The first they heard was of compounding interest rates coming down from the north.
>Shareholder's nerves cracked and they sold in the plummeting value of the dollar.
>"Balin, sell the stocks. Call the broker do it NOW."
>"What is it?"
>"...Audit."
>"AUUDIIIIIIIIIIT."
>It was a fire drake sent by the IRS.
>SMAUG HAD COME.
>Such sanctions had been dealt that day,
>but these incomes of men less than $40k annually were nothing to Smaug.
>His audit was set on another prize.
>Dragons covet interest with a dark and fierce desire.
>...
>Erebor... was audited.
>A dragon will keep compounding interest on unpaid back taxes as long as he lives.
>"HELP US!!!!!"
>Thranduil didn't think it was a wise investment for his kin to subsidize the dwarves and risk his kin being audited by the dragon.
>No bailout came from the elves that day nor any day since...
So are balrogs and dragons also maiar that changed their forms permanently?
If not, then what are they?
Wasn't a point made that only Eru can give true life to something? Dragons seem really intelligent on par with the wisest beings around, so it stands to reason they possess real souls. So who are they?
Balrogs, definitely. I'm not sure about dragons, I read theories that they might be corrupted... something. I haven't read every single Tolkien book though, so maybe their existence is explained in HoME.
Morgoth created Ancalagon then Ancalagon spawned a race of dragons, right?
No, Ancalagon was just the biggest and was only revealed during the War of Wrath together with the other winged dragons. Glaurung was the oldest.
So where did dragons come from? My ass?
Yes
>Ancalagon was just the biggest and was only revealed
So, how do you hide something of that size?
Somewhere on the snow, behind the mountains.
it's made up slop but I feel somewhat uncomfortable looking at the dagor braggolach battlefield. There's just no escape. Adaptation when?
How would a dragon this size even work?
Any way it wanted.
Then Thorin dies and a few of his company go to liberate Moria only to die in pure terror, trapped inside between Orcs and The Watcher.
The lonely mountain is reclaimed by the dwarves, which would matter later in the war of the ring.
Dain of the iron hills becomes king under the mountain.
Lake town is destroyed but Dale is rebuilt.
Wealth of the mountain helps Dale prosper again.
Elves and dwarves fight together.
Bilbo becomes quite wealthy in spite of the looting.
Orc lives matter
I'm amazed that Thorin and crew held with only 14 dwarves in the battle of five armies for as long as they did.
>14 dwarves
Yeah, those 14 main character dwarves and an army of lake men, elves, and more dwarves. Their party being 14 is irrelevant if they’re part of a huge mob.
I honestly can't believe this nerd thread has been here a full day. As if there's anything to even talk about.
Smaug is cool.
>Noooooo, you can't talk about dragons and dwarves and LotR.
>You got to start another thread to complain about Marvel Movie #39!
>stupid anime watching queer
Anime website
It's hasn't been one for ages. Go back to your Cinemaphile containment board.
Wtf does chan mean then?
Okay if Gandalf can split a boulder in half with his staff why can’t he just split the heads apart of every goblin and orc in sight instead of just cracking boulders and meming around with them?
The rock was weathered and he hit a weak spot. It was bound to crack; not really a feat of strength but more taking advantage of geological processes.
No in the movies he was shooting blue energy at rocks and making them explode, like in the goblin tunnels he blasts a cliff to make an Indiana jones boulder that ran over a bunch of goblins. Just fricking blast the goblins??
The jackson hobbit films are not canon.
None of the films or shows or anything not made by Tolkien is canon.
the animated Hobbit, its voice cast, and the first Jackson trilogy are influential parts of LOTR that define later portrayals. People accept them as canon. Jackson's hobbit and ROP will be discarded because they're bad, not because I don't like them. If ROP does something good in later seasons that could change.
>Jackson's hobbit and ROP will be discarded because they're bad, not because I don't like them
ROP is steaming shit but your opinion on the Hobbit is subjective. I quite enjoy them and rewatch them after rewatching LOTR. It's like a nice little desert after a fine meal.
I'm a sensitive person. Watching all six extended editions would be a significant undertaking for me. It's obvious when we talk about watching films, or appreciating fine detail there's going to be some gap of communication here.
It's fine mate. There's things in the Hobbit that rub me the wrong way. Particularly the rabbit sled and the unnecessary elf-dwarf romance. But I still love the acting of Bilbo who perfectly portrays a hobbit and the other dwarves and the initial contact with Smaug. I don't think anything will have the quality of the original trilogy but the feeling and the fun sure makes me thankful that it could've been infinitely worse if it was produced post 2016.
You’re a diseased homosexual imagine putting RoPe in the same category as the Hobbit which is like 75% as good as LOTR.
imagine saying the hobbit is 75% as good as LOTR when it's not even as good as the animated version
Other than being bloated it’s basically the same exact thing/qual as LOTR. There was a questionable CG horse, Legolas running on blocks, oh no set it on fire! It’s kino and you’re moronic.
but why would you want another LOTR especially where The Hobbit is supposed to be? Bro, make it make sense
TFA is technically better and at least 70% as good as ANH in a vacuum, unfortunately for both franchises the original already exists. Nobody is seriously impressed by a knock-off marketed as a very different part of Tolkien
>TFA is technically better and at least 70% as good as ANH in a vacuum
What the Christ TFA is one of the worst, ugliest things ever made and ANH is great. The frick?
What happens here
Long scenic shots of New Zealand where characters can ride horses to show passage of time.
Tolkien sort of forgot
>The brown lands
What do you think?
poverty and cartels?
I just got the paper back sadly
>The wizard, to tell the truth, never minded explaining his cleverness more than once, so now he told Bilbo that both he and Elrond had been well aware of the presence of evil goblins in that part of the mountains. But their main gate used to come out on a different pass, one more easy to travel by, so that they often caught people benighted near their gates. Evidently people had given up going that way, and the goblins must have opened their new entrance at the top of the pass the dwarves had taken, quite recently, because it had been found quite safe up to now.
>“I must see if I can’t find a more or less decent giant to block it up again,” said Gandalf, “or soon there will be no getting over the mountains at all.”
What is a 'decent giant' in Tolkien's legendarium? Did he ever elaborate?
I'll pull out my copy of the hobbit here, page 68
>When he peeped out in the lightning-flashes, he saw that across the valley the stone-giants were out, and were hurling rocks at one another for a game, and catching them, and tossing them down into the darkness where they smashed among the trees far below, or splintered into little bits with a bang.
Tolkien isn't explicit about these inconsequential characters, but it's obvious what he's describing: a semi-intelligent, jolly gigantic humanoid made of stone, playing a game on the immense slopes. Compare that to An Unexpected Journey, and you can see the modern version is akin to "naturalistic" dragons- a cataclysmic, utterly primal 3000 foot high pseudo-being locked in epic battle forever. Like the bat dragon, this is modern anti-fantasy beliefs in action. Instead of an ancient race of giant children of the earth, you have "pure nature" the god of the liberal. Much the same is true of the goblins and their literal town as though someone said "what do they eat" during the moria scene.
What is it with you dorks and sperging out over dragon designs? There has never been a standardized look for a dragon. They've been depicted as legless worms, lion-headed hydras and a thousand other things over the centuries.
the point is people defend generic dragon designs because they're more biologically viable than six limbs, when prioritizing realism is the wrong approach to this particular story. In any case they only have 2-4 limbs anymore because it's cheaper. Rimesh needn't figure out how to make them dangle like on WoW dragons in flight
The batlike body design looks fine. The only design issue with Jackson's Smaug is his goofy face.
his voice and his actions and his size aren't good either, but the body is fine and its badness isn't the point
The size was emphasized very well. Big scary dragon is perfect for the movies. Or do you mean he should've been bigger?
The marketing need to one-up godzilla and tardasaurus meant he needed to be bigger than the book. Bigger and scarier means it's harder to have Bard's arc of killing him singlehandedly. It's no problem though, so long as it's done with ta-AAAUUBBLLLAARRHGGH!!!!!! I AM DEATHWING!!! I AM ALL THE DRAGONS!!!
Yeah Deathwing is cool. When Smaug says "I am death" at the end of desolation is was a tease in theaters but rewatching all three now it's pretty great. The Deathwing fight was more disappointing though
They were catching that 2012 VIBE of watching LOTR extended editions and playin WoW. That's why it has nothing to do with The Hobbit and is just LOTR+WoW. No point in making a WoW Cataclysm movie today, that would be setting cultural trends (risky) not following them
That's a bit of a stretch since WoW caught all the steam of the LOTR trilogy. why would the Hobbit try to do the reverse when WoW was already heading into MoP? Is there some concrete proof or are we just shooting the shit?
I don't know which zoomtard idiot shill you are or what you have playing on the bottom of your screen, but the conversation was about smaug and why he's way oversize. They felt he needed to mog deathwing
Dude, why are zoomers like your mortal enemy and anyone you don't like has to be one? I want to hear about your guild killed Ragnaros when it was current.
the people who defend the hobbit films never allow themselves to be caught in any kind of lore or filmmaking conversation. They seem almost completely without shame "I like what I like, dunno why, but I'm gonna post about it"
usually I think those are younger people
I know it could be better, but I like the good parts and scorn the bad parts. That's about it. I don't think you and me have a quarrel here. The other guy maybe. I just like it.
Please man, like animating Onyxia was too expense for a studio creating the prequel to the greatest fantasy trilogy of all time. if 2004 blizzard could do it then they could
that's really why all hollywood monster mobs are just simple snakes or animals. Pixar buckbroke them in 2001 with monsters inc and muh polygons, then Cameron made it his mission to continue the blue rape. Today everything they do is expensive because the overall effects and environment detail is jacked up to please bosses, and the supposedly revolutionary avaturd and disney syndicates are, in practice, just keeping all the talent off the market to produce bullshit.
>doesn’t like avatar
Let me guess you’re the guy who also doesn’t like the hobbit. I’m half thinking you’re some kind of troon.
Irony-post all you want, I know that if you engage with me you'll fail dumb zoomer.
I was right. Get some taste.
rewatch avatar 1&2 right now
I saw 2 in theaters and the first one twice. The only thing about the first one I like is the general guy and the part where they blow up the tree.
right about what? that I reply to people who reply to me? Dumb nig boy buck
He's probably a different person because I've been defending the Hobbit this whole time and I'm not too big of an avatar fan.
Where do these giants come from?
Who made them?
Are they also maiar just fricking around?
Are they golems made with magic?
Who made them?
Bear in mind a point was made that only Eru can give true life and Morgoth had to warp what already existed so these giants, dragons and such that are intelligent beings can't just spring up from thin air into existence.
well you see, far below the deepest delving of the dwarves, the earth is gnawed by nameless things. Even Sauron knows them not. They shat out the stone gians
The notion that new forms of sentient beings can only be created from that which is naturally sentient is a genius on Tolkien's part. Like only natural processes we don't understand can form souls and they cannot be artificially created no matter how hard it is tried places a significant value on life.
how come this homie, neolas or whatever, didn't use the undead army against the orcs? the ghouls couldve of soloed the whole fricking thing and won it np
no need, they were already way ahead
>Go on an adventure
>Come home
>Scumbag relatives are selling off your home and belongings
Bilbo came home the richest Hobbit in Middle Earth
>Scumbag relatives are selling off your home and belongings
those motherfricking Sackville-Bagginses!
Did elves and dwarves really kill one another to the last until the orcs came?
No, they were just getting ready to. Then gandalf showed up and told everybody to get their shit together.
You DO have a nice hardback edition of The Hobbit with Tolkein's own original cover design (complete with the intended red sun and Smaug), right, anon?
yea butt it's signed so I loaned it to the estate. tax write off
Did you have permission to loan that book to the estate?
those eyes... did it ever occur to you, sir, that the Toker estate might have good reason for keeping that picture suppressed? Even now, the pixels seem to melt..
it's wild that this all existed in one brain and we're just left to tangle with what should come next
To be fair to Peter Jackson, he was brought in to take over for someone else for The Hobbit and the studio pushed for a trilogy.