>the movie that destroyed Cinemaphile
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>the movie that destroyed?
>the movie that destroyed Cinemaphile
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It’s a huge moron and autist filter, otherwise it’s a good movie
The guy did it to himself by overinvesting emotionally in a woman who told him to his face in no uncertain terms that she wasn't interested in a serious relationship.
Then he fricked up again by imagining a childish naive scenario when they met and she invited him to the party.
He had to take the lesson twice and the open-ended final scene leaves the male viewer with the question: should he repeat the cycle with a different woman or focus on his self-development and not make a woman the center of his life?
>no uncertain terms wasn't interested in a relationship
Let's take it easy with the triple negatives there big brain.
I think it's dated in two ways, not as a film per se:
-If they had just communicated more the movie wouldn't have happened at all. Tom wanted something serious, Summer didn't
-I'm old enough to know that if Tom wasn't a clingy b***h who had his shit together Summer would have been all over him and dying to make him her boyfriend
-she communicated in the clearest way imaginable more than once and when he had his meltdown it was obvious that she'd bounce. It takes 2 to tango
-he had a problem that the movie subtly but clearly indicates: no objective professional prospects. Before they consider getting into a serious relationship, most women take into account your social/economic standing and goals. The fact that the guy she got engaged to a guy who seemed to be well-off and manly rather than boyish confirms that
>she communicated in the clearest way imaginable more than once and when he had his meltdown it was obvious that she'd bounce. It takes 2 to tango
Right but mostly I mean in the car scene where he mistakenly puts the onus on her to determine what they are.
>-he had a problem that the movie subtly but clearly indicates: no objective professional prospects. Before they consider getting into a serious relationship, most women take into account your social/economic standing and goals. The fact that the guy she got engaged to a guy who seemed to be well-off and manly rather than boyish confirms that
100%, but not necessarily the money bit. Just that you're in control of your life and where you're going and don't have meltdowns.
The moment he lost his cool and shouted "I say we're a couple Godammit" like a 12 yo was the last straw but she clearly wanted out even before that.
As for money, self-support is an important aspect of being in control of one's life. It signals independence and the material/psychological power to raise a family
>As for money, self-support is an important aspect of being in control of one's life. It signals independence and the material/psychological power to raise a family
I'm being unclear tonight because that's what I meant. Not necessarily "wealthy", but "independent" and self-sufficient absolutely.
t. shitty job but no problem keeping girlfriends
Yes, key word ofc being job, men don't need to be multimillionaires to get gfs
>If they had just communicated more the movie wouldn't have happened at all
99% of Hollywood movies right there
Hollywood is full of hacks that force conflict then
yes well thats 99% of all media even books
its how the abcient greeks did it
but back then they would wink to the audience and say "Hush now! Dont tell him!"
You write a story without conflict or crisis you'll bore your audience to tears.
YOU CANNOT HAVE A PROTAGONIST WITHOUT DESIRE IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE. IT DOESN'T MAKE ANY. FRICKING. SENSE. Ya follow?
there are ways to write conflict beyond "this was totally avoidable if one of them had just taken three seconds to open up"
And water is wet.
Bro, you guys can‘t get through three turns of mtg without having a b***hfight about wording. Don‘t tell me miscommunication is a foreign concept to you
Do I know you, "bro"?
Come to think of it, I feel like a woman liking The Smiths is not a good sign. A man liking The Smiths is not a good sign but at least he might be aware of the fact and why he listens to them in the first place.
>girl: I'm not looking for anything serious
>guy: I can't believe she wasn't serious
>girl: I'm not looking for anything serious
Translation: I'm looking for anyone BUT YOU. He should have bolted at the very second she started with the womanspeak.
>A bawd and a simp date for a few months
>She's bad for using him when he's clearly more invested in the relationship
>He's a moron for becoming invested in a flaky girl that clearly has no interest in anything serious with him
There were no heroes.
No villains or heroes, he was just a female following her genetic programming and he was and incurable wimpy beta
She invited him to the party knowing she was engaged and it would hurt him. He was an idiot, but she was cruel and indifferent to his feelings.
She never has any regard for his feelings. I don't even think she was trying to be cruel, she just didn't even think how he would feel about that for even a moment because she didn't care. lol at him for being so invested in a woman that so clearly gives zero fricks about you.
>She never has any regard for his feelings.
Yeah that's probably closed to reality, she just had no empathy for him at all. Pretty sad for her to live like that, but good portrayal of someone with near sociopathic tendencies.
>She never has any regard for his feelings. I don't even think she was trying to be cruel, she just didn't even think how he would feel about
This. When women are trying g to be cruel they frick your best friend and try to get your dog put into a pound, and destroy your car.
When women are just being women they destroy your soul and drain happiness from you.
She seemed to honestly think they were through. The movie never depicts her as vindictive or calculating. In fact, she acts candidly and authentically from the moment they meet in the elevator.
She seems to assume he also saw their past relationship for what it was: a fling, and once you're over someone (man or woman) you often desexualize the other perso, you simply can't imagine him/her as a prospect.
When it's over, it's over, and she commonsensical ly understood that
>She seemed to honestly think they were through. The movie never depicts her as vindictive or calculating. In fact, she acts candidly and authentically from the moment they meet in the elevator.
Nah I'm calling bullshit. She could clearly read from him that he was not over her. I mean why not say she was engaged?
She enjoyed having an orbiter.
>She enjoyed having an orbiter.
Well yeah definitely. But again goes to little/no empathy on her part / sociopathic tendencies.
I mean...let's reverse the genders, would women think he was treating her ok?
I'm not defending her. I'm just explaining why she would've decided to keep her engagement a secret.
>I'm not defending her. I'm just explaining why she would've decided to keep her engagement a secret.
No it definitely fits, she has low empathy/sociopath and would want him orbiting. She didn't care about him at all
>She didn't care about him at all
Made patently clear the entire movie. Begs the question why is he so interested in her when she does not reciprocate? He should've banged her then stopped answering her calls. That probably would've made her more interested in him to boot. I guess I can't talk. I've done some absolutely moronic things chasing women and not realised until after. Oneitis is cancerous.
She cared about him as a frick buddy and occasional no strings attached date. Many people have these relationships and the unspoken rule is to understand when that's the case.
He latched on to her in a way that made him seem inferior in social value and desperate to secure a gf/wife, so her aloofness and distancing only became more pronounced and she predictably broke up with him.
>She cared about him as a frick buddy and occasional no strings attached date
Which is to say not at all.
He misinterpreted social cues and read too much into her invitation, which was casual and spur of the moment.
A person w more emotional experience would have thanked her but declined to go to the party. Very often we project our feelings onto others in a non-reciprocal way, and his feelings are his responsibility, not someone else's
>and his feelings are his responsibility, not someone else's
They dated for a number of months.
He was stupid, but she definitely capitalized on that and used him regardless of his feelings. It's manipulative.
That's not meaningful in itself, not least because she verbalized her pov more than once: she did not want anything serious or to take their relationship to another level.
Her hesitancy should have sufficed for him to realize his feelings were not reciprocated.
As I mentioned above, there are unspoken rules for casual relationships that don't change if only one person in the couple catches feelings-- the effect is often the opposite as in the movie.
Keep in mind that sometimes it's the woman who becomes clingy, it's not just men
>and once you're over someone (man or woman) you often desexualize the other perso,
no, and this is why I could never be friends with an ex
>you simply can't imagine him/her as a prospect.
fair
>I said I like to suck off strange men in elevators!
>hello?
It's very similar to:
Eternal Sunshine
Scott Pilgrim
Basically a sperg tries to fall in love with some dumbshit normie, and she ends up getting bored with him and cheats / otherwise breaks his heart.
Spergs: stay away from normies.
>eternal sunshine
she loved him and he was emotionally distant
>Pilgrim
he's actually as bad as ramona
sunshine
>she loved him and he was emotionally distant
>he's actually as bad as ramona
I didn't get that at all, especially from his recording to himself about her. She did cheat on him, she was bored with him. Seems like she was only with him because she had BPD and was the only one that could tolerate her.
Scott is meant to be a selfish guy who sees himself as a sad loser.
How does one find sperg women? That are actually women, I mean.
>How does one find sperg women? That are actually women, I mean.
OK cupid
Comic-con
bookstores / comic book stores
college
i had a sperg. the emotional baggade she had was greater than the dept of the USA. just yikes
What was her problem?
Has it happened to you, Cinemaphile?
No but I'm afraid it might...
Been seeing a girl regularly, for about a year now, I think she's into me but how do I take it up a level from just hanging out (restaurants, walks and such) to actual relationship ? Surely she wouldn't be a total Summer and lead me on if she meant nothing by it ?
>Been seeing a girl regularly (restaurants, walks and such) for about a year now
>for about a year now..
If you've been casually hanging out for a year and nothing has developed in terms of romantic chemistry or physical intimacy, it's probably not happening.
Shit, how should anything develop tho ? I have autism (not actually, but I am pretty hopeless, khv past 25)
It's said that women decided almost *instantly* whether a guy is worth their time. From that moment, the interactions can go from talking, to flirting, to fricking, to a steady relationship very quickly. 2-4 dates across a two week timeline is reasonable. If you're still in the just "hanging out" stage after that, it's not happening.
>if she's interested, she'll make time.
>if she's not, she'll make excuses.
is a good rule of a thumb to determine if there's potential. And that rule applies to all things, from how long it takes for her to text back, to how available she is for a date, to how open she is to physical intimacy.
It sounds like you're stuck in the orbiting stage with her. I know the feeling. It sucks. But if I was able to escape the autistic khv doldrums, so can you. Just know that it's probably going to be with someone else. Good luck and godspeed, anon..
Ok, thanks a lot for your experience and encouragement, anon. I'll bear that in mind, but yeah it might be over...
OTOH, I sure as hell wouldn't initiate physical contact (autism) and I think she's the religious type and would not do anything sexual either (not muslim, maybe tradcath or strict evangelical)
Ok. Not to get your hopes up, but if she's one of those really rare prudish, homeschooled, religious types, there miggghhht be a chance for you yet. If that's the case, it might be worth stating your intentions plainly. To her, and her parents. It will be in your interest to have a clear vision for where you see the relationship going, which means having a clear vision of where *you* are going. Mumbling something about spending time with her, and um liking her a lot, is not going to cut it. If this is a trad's daughter, they'll want you to be steady, committed, and forthright, with something tangible to offer as far as providing a future.
Ok thanks again anon, I'll probably try to do it, should get more info on the parents maybe. I'll have to work out a suitable context to approach the issue though
Hahaha holy shit how I wish I could be a fly on the wall for the impending disaster this is going to be. Definitely do not reveal your romantic intentions for the very first time with her parent present anon, but if you do please film it.
? I'm confused, who said anything about revealing romantic intentions when the parents were present ? that would be ludicrous (as would filming it tbh)
>”If that's the case, it might be worth stating your intentions plainly. To her, and her parents.”
>”Ok thanks again anon, I'll probably try to do it, should get more info on the parents maybe. I'll have to work out a suitable context to approach the issue though”
Also major indicator of emotional immaturity referring to an admission of feelings for someone who has been around for apparently over a year as an “issue.” My bets are on this isn’t the one. If there hasn’t been a single shred of any sort of flirtatious behavior between either of you for the entire year you’ve been “going out,” I think it’s safe to say there never really will be.
Oh yes, that's what he said, although you'll note I did NOT say I would reveal my "romantic intentions" for the first time when parents were present, merely that I should get more info their background. Bit of a difference tbh
"issue" was a humorous turn of phrase, but not for everyone I guess. Thanks for your opinion though, ragging aside, I do appreciate it ! Although, as mentioned, I am somewhat autistic and the girl in question functionally acts like she is, so I'm never sure what to make of advice (except in an autistic-rich environment like this one)
Yeah I can fricking tell and I worry for you anon. This much autism isn’t good for anyone. Godspeed
Thanks for the good wishes, anon
>>if she's interested, she'll make time.
>>if she's not, she'll make excuses.
This alights the man's soul in a perennial rage
S...surely some excuses are legit though, Mr anon ?
She's not "busy", or "sick", or "tired". Her phone didn't "die". She didn't "miss your text". Her pet is fine. So is her friend. She doesn't have to "get up early the next day". Or "study for a test". Her car works, and she's perfectly comfortable driving it at night, in the rain, for hours.
I've heard it all. And it's all bullshit. I've also seen the flipside and had a girl take time off work, cancel plans with friends and drive two hours through a blizzard in a shitbox car just to get to me.
Yuge if true
Yeah, but all these things can actually happen ; even if she might, it seems a little romantic (dare I say, as we were initially discussing 500 Days of Summer) to expect a woman will overcome any and every odd just to spend time with you
A woman will move heaven and earth to be with you if she wants it.
For me it was an old girlfriend housing me unbeknownst to any of her family for about a month.
This is true. They instinctively decide almost instantly if you're partner material. That's why chasing girls is a waste of time. Shoot your shot and then move on. You should be with someone who wants to be with you, not somebody you had to convince.
everyone read this post and never forget the wisdom inside of it, because this happened to me too word for word
I had been orbiting around this girl for months, always anxious around her because even though she never explicitly pushed me back, it always seemed I had to drag the words and actions out of her mouth and body
after more than a year I finally stated what i wanted and she noped me but tried to keep close nonetheless
then 3 months ago i started talking to a new girl which became my gf 1 month in and I'm meeting her parents and brother next week
if a girl is into you you do NOT feel like you must get her to do things, she will help you break the ice herself
she will not be emotionally distant
she will not meh any of your advances and suggestions
she will suggest new dates and ways to meet and will be eager to hear yours
you won't feel anxious around a girl that likes you because you will feel her warmth and acceptance
if you don't feel this with a girl after the first date, you are likely not gonna be her bf
This is absolutely spot on and something that I’m sure a great many of us wish we had learned or paid heed to much, much earlier in life. Oh well, you live you learn but this is one of the ultimate truths right here and anyone who wants to try to deny it has some growing to do. Was never a khv past the first year of high school but I definitely made that mistake several times of trying way too hard and putting in too much effort with girls who were in hindsight obviously just humoring me. Shit sucks but it’s up to you how you bounce back.
invite her to make dinner at your place or hers, then get drunk and go for a kiss
Nice, taking notes rn
>Has it happened to you, Cinemaphile?
It's happening to me rn. Same thing: we both wanted a one night frick but I ended up liking her, we started to hang out, I started to fall in love with her, but she didn't. The problem is... the break up happened a year ago, and it was bad, yeah, and forgot about it for a time. But for some reason I dreamed of her this morning and now I miss her. I really miss her a lot. I feel like shit.
i don't like this movie
it's contrived on multiple levels
you have to have a woman who wants to just have a shallow sexual relationship with a boring guy, tells him to his face and he completely ignores this, then end the relationship for no actual reason other than she thinks it's going on too long and she doesn't want to get too close
where is the conflict? That the protagonist is dumb as bricks and thinks, somehow, that he's going to change her mind about her original plan? Why would he 'date' a girl who has no intention of doing so seriously?
This movie depends on the characters in it being unrealistically stupid.
1. Why can't she find a guy who would obviously be cool with a quick, shallow, interaction? Why does she play along with JGL's idiotic romantic efforts?
2. If she wants to get married why the frick is she trying to form a shallow and doomed relationship first? Like, I get trolling for strange but that's not what she does, she spends days with this guy she fully intends to frick and leave. Why frick him? Why start it up? None of this makes any sense. There are infinite gym rats that wouldn't say no to her but also don't want any kind of real relationship, either.
3. As for the protagonist, why can't he pay attention or listen to what she is saying AT ALL? I get it, men tend to not listen but he was already told 100x she only wants a shallow frick and he keeps trying to romance her like a fricking NCP walking into a wall for hours.
The STORY is too artificial, it's designed to play out one way with no possibility of surprise, she is a weird, unrealistic 'harpy' that exists purely to break a generic male protagonists heart that even if he was smart enough to listen to what's going on, he is not capable by the writer gods of ever getting out of the trap set for him. It's nonsense. To the point their dialogue becomes idiotic shit no human would say and their behavior turns into a bizarre aesop no one really needs.
The problem is that youre autistic and don't understand people.
Based
No it's stupid.
>I'm not looking for anything serious
>Wtf why doesn't she want to be with me??
Yes. You don't understand why someone would do this because you're autistic.
Basically the entire plot of this movie has happened to me. I‘d say it‘s pretty authentic. Though it was always bound to upset incels. That doesn‘t count as valid criticism though
Blud has never met a person in his life
>This movie depends on the characters in it being unrealistically stupid.
You know nothing about being in love with the wrong person. It happens. All the time. It's not as simple as you think, men can be stubborn, they can lie to themselves thinking they can change them. What's so unrealistic about it? It's a movie about a realistic process of breaking up with someone who doesn't love you.
Good for you if you haven't experienced that.
>This movie depends on the characters in it being unrealistically stupid.
I imagine people in real life are realistically smart then, right?
1: He was an idiot for thinking "I can change her mind". He lied to her saying that he was ok with not having a serious relationship. She was clear, transparent the whole time. She did not want a serious relationship and he agreed with that. Period.
2: She was a piece of shit for inviting him to her engagement party. Anyone with a brain knows that it's a b***h move, an extremely hurtful thing to do to your ex. The "I invited you to the party because I don't hate you" is the most meaningless line in the movie, at that point she could have just said "I did it because yeah why not, I don't care about you"
In brief: he was a hypocrite idiot and she was a heartless b***h.
I'm tired of people saying HURR DURR THE REAL VILLAIN WAS THE GUY CAUSE SHE WAS CLEAR THE WHOLE TIME. Yeah and what about the evil shit she did? Fricking cucks, respect yourselves.
Anyone who says Tom is in the wrong here has been way indoctrinated by feminist bullshit. Yes, Tom was an idiot and should have heeded the warning signs and bailed ASAP. But Summer saying she didn't want anything too serious when for all intents and purposes they were acting as boyfriend and girlfriend and having a ton of intimacy moments is at BEST sending mixed signals. And the invitation at the end was just pure callousness at her end.
Tom was a naive, inexperienced fool. Summer was an uncaring user.
Well said.
Autumn is a fricking catch though
Same career, actually have something in common and also willing to go on a date
I just fricking love woman so much bros.
Autumn was hotter too
I wanna tickle torture and worship Zuzus beautiful berry toes like you people can't believe
>Woman tells man, to his face, that she is not interested in a serious long term relationship at all
>Man ignores this and continues to fall deeper and deeper in love and envisioning a future together
>Gets upset when she eventually does leave him
>Anons side with the man
Really telling of the emotional knowledge that Cinemaphile holds
>"I'm not interested in a serious long term relationship at all, tee hee."
>gets engaged to a financially secure, emotionally mature Chad
All she had to do to be completely honest was say:
>"I'm not interested in a serious long term relationship *with you*.
Leaving that qualifier out is what makes her appear duplicitous.
She's still not in the wrong. She never lied to him, what she does after the relationship is over is none of the MCs concern.
>He's undatable because... HE'S IMMATURE AND EMOTIONALLY gayILE
I hate women and men who condone this wretchedness
>just because a pretty girl is into the same weirdo shit as you doesn't mean she's your soulmate
Dumbass didn't listen
That's seeing the forest for the trees. She would have been all over him and they could have listened to the Smiths and had sex all day forever if he had his shit together.
>Dead end job
>No aspirations
>Clingy
Enjoying the same bizarro crap as your gf is very enjoyable and a good sign of compatibility as long as the bizarro crap isn't destructive like enjoying Hall and Oates together.
>villain
>hero
They're both villains to themselves, and neither are heroes.
There are heroes on both sides.
The girl who did this to me 15 years ago is now a bitter pet mama femcel and I am now a bitter 4chud incel. Do you think there's a chance we'll have no choice but to settle for each other as we approach 40?
DO IT
>would you like to be bitter, angry and alone... together?
Now THIS is a movie.
>Date Manic Pixie Girl
>Take her to this movie
>Realize this was a huge mistake
>Break up a week later
>She gets crazier as years go on
Smartest move I made, tbh. Movie is the first red pill. These girls sound great in HS, but then you date them and realize what a miserable experience it all is.
>I said I love Jamiroquai