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TIMES YOU ACTED LIKE DETECTIVE MARK HOFFMAN
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One time I smashed a man's head against a desk and called him a fricking c**t, which was intended to emasculate him by comparing him to the female sex organ.
One time, I was in a rooftop, all naked, unarmed, surrounded by the police who wanted to arrest me, with an helicopter shining its light on me, and I still managed to escape and kill everybody who wanted to kill me, plus a guy who put me in a trap that would force me to cut my hand, which I beat
Hi Hoffman how you doing man
Hoffman was the one interesting thing the series had after John died.
Also, holy shit, that drop-off in quality in Saw 7. What the frick happened?
>Acting went to shit
>camera-work went to shit
>effects went to shit
>lighting went to shit
>writing went to shit
>Drop off in quality
You can blame that one on the whole 3D thing they tried to pull. Apparently if you do watch it how it’s intended to, it’s not so bad
Who the frick cares about all that!? SAW VII HAD HOFFMAN INFILTRATE A POLICE STATION IN A BODY BAG AND KILL EVERYBODY THERE TO KILL JILL!
>Hoffman kills JILL
>He says the only problem with killing her is being able to only do it once
>Turns out it was a dream by Jill
>Later, Hoffman kills Jill for real
>mfw Hoffman actually killed Jill more than once
KINO! KINO, I TELL YOU!
Who was in the wrong here
His character has absolutely no depth
His character is not about depth. His character is supposed to be the opposite of John's. John is calculating, vain, and extremely particular, and his morality is based on redemption. Hoffman is a strong-man who overwhelms his opponents, is highly adaptable, and single-minded in his determination, while he bases his morality on punishment.
I don't think Hoffman had any morality, I think he's just a guy who kills a lot. The premise of the character is just
>What if jiggy's methods were learned by a REAL killer?
Well as far as I can tell, he only did it once, and to the guy that murdered his sister. He didn't want to redeem him, he wanted to punish him, since the law failed.
And? He's the villain. He's an eviler successor to Jigsaw. What more do you need in a series of formula based 90 minute horror films?
>camera-work went to shit
>after saw 7
lmao it has some of the funniest camera work in any movie series ever
Two planned films got crammed into one, 3D filming was forced in, and all without any additional time, they got the same fast production all the Saw films have had.
I miss Hoffman
He’s still alive anon
We need one last movie with him as a protagonist dabbing on all the thots while Jigsaw himself acts like a father to him and gives him his blessing one last time.
>X established that Hoffman knew about the bathroom and therefore could have set up a contingency.
Yeah, I'm thinking he's back
>Saw XI has a trailer where he parodies Kevin Spacey's first Christmas video and ends with the line 'you never saw me die, didn't you?' while he grabs his pig mask
Thread theme
His character was inconsistent. I like the idea of him playing both sides and having his cake and eating it too. Like he wants to be the hero cop who chases Jigsaw while also being the criminal mastermind who terrorizes the city. Since John Kramer is gone he thinks he's above all accountability. But the films never indicate what aspect of the traps are his innovations on John's plans. There's a weird dissonance where the trap segments of the plot are John's will being projected from beyond the grave, but then we're supposed to care about Hoffman running from the police, when he's mostly just John's errand boy.
One time I was working at a gas station that sells hotdogs and I sliced my hand open on the hotdog rotator machine while cleaning it and started bleeding all over the place. My boss at the time was a corporate wienersucker who would fire any employees who accidentally injured themselves under the guise of 'not following safety procedures'. I was bleeding very badly and my boss walked out from the back office so I quickly pressed my wounded hand against the side of the hot dog roller machine thing. It was very hot and it burned my hand but it also helped cauterized the wound. I pretended to continue cleaning the machine and eventually the bleeding stopped. My boss asked me about all the blood on the counter and I told him a customer made a mess with ketchup. He believed me and I worked there for another couple years and even got him fired when corporate inspectors found my medical marijuana inside the bathroom soap dispenser and made everyone take a drug test. I had my medical weed license but my boss also tested positive and had no medical license so he got fired and I was then promoted to manager. I then used my manager powers to order extra crates of redbull and monster energy drinks which I then proceeded to write off as 'damaged' and would then take home and sell on craigslist for a fat profit. I was Mark Hoffman til the very end.
>till the very end
Did you get fired? Or did you quit?
I quit once I finished college and could get a better higher paying job.
I once stabbed a kid with a pencil in school.
He threatened to tell the teacher, so I then stabbed myself and told him "if you tell on me, I'm saying you did this."
I'm a bit of a "Hoffman" myself.
not reposting anywhere because i'm not a gay who goes on other websites but i just wanted this post saved for posterity
nice
Oh, I got one, this one time I trapped a guy in a room and engineered a death game for him.
Someone accused me of samegayging, I just looked at them very smugly and left. Later on I had his thread deleted by reporting it without giving him any chance to escape.
I was a traffic cop for the municipality and I was a straight-shooter. I did things by the books and never deviated. I knew I wasn't loved but it mattered that I held myself accountable to the law. But then my little sister got married to the CFO of some highfalutin e-commerce thing. It didn't last long and they divorced, splitting their assets 50/50. She told him to keep her Nintendo 64 because she never played it. But I grew up with that Nintendo 64 and I wanted it back. Some homosexual white-collar punk wasn't going to take my memories with him. So I went to his apartment and demanded it back. He told me I wasn't allowed to talk to him after the Thanksgiving incident. I said, "Dave, give me the N64. Do you want to play games, Dave? I can play games." He refused me point-blank. His fate was sealed right then and there.
I rented a U-Haul and bought $15,000 worth of industrial saw blades. Then I went to the pet store to buy a king cobra. They didn't have a king cobra, so I settled for a corn snake. But they told me I had to provide proof of housing. My parents said I couldn't own pets anymore so I tried calling my sister. She said she was still moving after the divorce. I then called Dave and asked him to cover for me by adopting it. He showed up and signed the forms. Then I said, "Congrats, Dave, you are now the owner of a corn snake." He asked me why I had a U-Haul parked outside. I had forgotten about the saw blades so I tried returning them, but the vendor refused. I asked if he wanted to play a game. He threatened to call the cops so I left.
I later asked Dave how the corn snake was but he told me he had returned it. Then he told me never to call him again. I said, "Some people are so ungrateful to be alive. But not you, not anymore." Then he hung up on me. Goodbye, Dave. Enjoy playing Banjo Kazooie with your worn out analog stick, you pretentious frick.
AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Spectacular scene. That was when i knew Saw VII would be great
>Saw VII would be great
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Detective Smugs Bunny
one time I took out a room of fbi agents with nothing but a cup of coffee and a pocket knife
And I was right to do it
One time, someone farted into a room I was in and shut the door and held it from the other side, an inescapable trap. But I leaped through the window, lacerating myself in twelve places and fracturing my arm and shoulder when I landed. But my nostrils were full only with fresh air. I escaped.
>right now you are feeling helpless