uhhh smith bros? where is it....

uhhh smith bros? where is it....

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  1. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    it'll start filming as soon as Kevin finishes eating his block of cheese

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >Kevin keeps a car battery sized block of sharp cheddar cheese on his persons at all times
      >has an inhaler around neck
      >is actually spray cheese in case of emergency situation where he runs out of cheese whiz

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >as Kevin finishes eating his block of cheese
      I dislike Kevin Smith as much as anyone, but I thought everyone knew that the joke was the picture of him chowing down on a block of cheese while pumping gas was photoshopped.

      The arm and cheese is from another meme picture of some fat woman at Disneyland or some shit.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        I didn't know that actually, but it's too late it's part of the myth surrounding him now

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >as Kevin finishes eating his block of cheese
      I dislike Kevin Smith as much as anyone, but I thought everyone knew that the joke was the picture of him chowing down on a block of cheese while pumping gas was photoshopped.

      The arm and cheese is from another meme picture of some fat woman at Disneyland or some shit.

      Also after his minor heart attack he ended up losing a shit ton of weight and eating better.

  2. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Kevin needs to stop doing drugs, and Mewes needs to start again.

  3. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    I don't want to see what 2022 Jason Lee looks like.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >2022 Jason Lee l
      According to google, he hangs out with Kanye and is a homie now

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      You know how he looked like your deadbeat uncle? The one your grandparents had late and were kinda embarrassed about it?
      He looks like your dad now.
      Left scientology too, good for him

  4. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    This is worse than the time Walt Flanagans dog starred in Yoga Hosers as Jason Mewes face double

  5. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Jay and Silent Bob 2 was one of the worst movies I've ever seen.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      I thought he did a good job with clerks II so decided to give J@SB II a shot.....turned that shit off as soon as they met his "daughter".

      Total fricking trash. Smith can't make anything but garbage anymore.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        Smith's brain is rotten by weed and stuck in the 90's comedy, but not good comedy, like a bad memory of what it used to be funny
        some guys are not made for drugs

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          >rotted by weed
          More like rotted by Hollywood leftist politics.

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          >and stuck in the 90's comedy, but not good comedy, like a bad memory of what it used to be funny
          I don't think it's even that. If it was then at least his newer films would be nostalgic. He completely fails to capture any spirit of feeling of the 90s, while at the same time being stuck in a self-referential vortex

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          his only decent 'stoner movies' were made when he didn't smoke and it shows, everything he did after and including Zack and Miri and becoming an moron stoner is just garbage.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        clerks 2 was like 20 years ago

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        Clerks II is only half a good movie. Once the musical starts it goes to shit

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      the first jay and silent bob sucks, never seen 2

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        The first jay and silent bob is classic mate.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        >the first jay and silent bob sucks
        moron
        >never seen 2
        okay maybe not

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      The reboot killed any last remaining hope I had for Clerks 3, or any other desperate cash grab sequel this fat frick could make based on the good ones from 20 years ago.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      There was a Jay and Silent Bob 2?

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >Jay and Silent Bob 2

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Agreed. It actually made me angry how bad it was.
      >AND STOP MAKING THAT STUPID FRICKING FACE KEVIN AAAAHHHHHHH

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        i listened to jay go on steve-o's podcast and he spent like 20 minutes talking about his legos

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          link? sounds based

          • 2 years ago
            Anonymous

            was a boring as frick podcast to me but here

            • 2 years ago
              Anonymous

              thanks. i'm running out of things to waste my time with

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      They even said it in the trailer that this is the best Kevin Smith’s got. I actually liked Tusk and I’ll give Clerks 3 a chance but I’ve recognized that Smith films are in a death spiral and I should never watch any of his new movies without getting thoroughly drunk first.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        >I actually liked Tusk

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          Michael Parks raised the quality of everything he was in to a ridiculous amount. He’s the reason I like the first hour of Red State too.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >Jay and Silent Bob 2 was one of the worst movies I've ever seen.
      You haven't seen many movies then.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        Name a few that are worse.

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          All of the Leprechaun films.

          • 2 years ago
            Anonymous

            >All of the Leprechaun films.
            ? Those are all based films. (well, 2 sucked) but they were all better than Jay and Silent Bob Part 2

          • 2 years ago
            Anonymous

            They're at least self aware about it

            • 2 years ago
              Anonymous

              >muh self awareness
              They sucked, that's it.

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                >t. anon whose mother was raped by leprechauns

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      clerks 2 was his last good movie tbqh

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      If you didn't like it you were never a true fan

  6. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >inb4 his kids are in it

  7. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Canned for Clerks 3

  8. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    wtf is a mall?

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      It's where you hang with Avril.

  9. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >a group of 40 year old and 50 year olds hanging out in a mall

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Do Malls even really exist?

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        they do but joggers took them over so they're no-go zones for normal people

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        >Do Malls even really exist?
        Yes, but unless the suburban area they serve is still largely white, they're basically nothing but a hunting ground for feral black teens. Also, any that do exist have likely lost all but the largest or cheapest chain stores and are in massive decline.

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          they do but joggers took them over so they're no-go zones for normal people

          why do black people like malls so much now?

          • 2 years ago
            Anonymous

            >why do black people like malls so much now?
            Lots of stores with a single large, open entrance so they can easily run in and out with stolen stuff, and generally open space for them to run around, people to beat or rob, and generally a delayed police response since there's so much parking lot space for them to disappear into.

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          The malls near me are all Mexicans and pajeets. The joggers rob them in the parking structures.

          • 2 years ago
            Anonymous

            Once you take the blackpill and realize everything is inevitably going to shit, the only real concern of the white man in America is trying to decide which inferior race you support in their inevitable little conflicts

  10. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Kevin Smith's specialty early on was being somewhat grounded. As he put his head up Hollywood's ass he got away with the absurdist stuff for a little bit, but he's totally tapped out now. He should just hang it up and focus on bad podcasts and living off his wealth.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      it always confused me that he never realized the value of Clerks was how down to earth it was. Sure it was comedy, but it was also real in a way that most movies aren't. Everything he made after that was typical fake hollywood bullshit and don't even get me started on his hammy silent bob "acting" in the later movies

  11. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    oh come on. give us something new. What's next, pineapple express 2?
    idk if I'll even watch this, every fricking reboot and sequel that's come out of something I like recently has sucked major dick

  12. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    is going to be shit

  13. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Are malls still a thing?

  14. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    prime Joey Lauren Adams was sexy AF

    she used to bang Kevin though, so that's gross (Chasing Amy was based on his relationship with JLA)

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      absolute qt

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        i didn't know people wore masks back then
        why did boomers freak out during covid then?

  15. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >entire original cast
    So they're using the digital Stan Lee?

  16. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Not even kidding did some editing gruntwork on a documentary surrounding chasing amy recently and Kevin is focused on making that into a TV show or something. He mentioned mallrats 2 occasionally, shooting got fricked from covid. I can answer any other questions you guys have if you want. I don't have a lot of info but I was literally forced to listen to 24+ hours of audio of him talking about specifics of production shit from his career and future projects.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      so what is the plot like? dont need to give details but like any sort of brief synopsis? and do you have any details on clerks 3? youre prob fake but regardless of the answer its good mindfood so i dont care either way

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        It's takes place in an alternative universe where malls are still relevant and the 90s never ended.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        Not fake. Don't know how I can prove it without doxxing myself since it's a pretty small crew working on the chasing amy documentary. Like I sais he mentioned mallrats 2 very sparingly since he was talking primarily about chasing amy and the production of his movies, so he really didn't mention anything about the plot, but if you want to know where his mind is at he talked a lot about how he loved how he handled the sort of mini epilogue for Chasing amy in either J&SBSB or Reboot (I forget which one since I haven't seen either, whichever has the sort of chasing amy epilogue in it )but I'd say the best I can give for a vague direction on where mallrats 2 is going is to look at that if you want to see how he's gonna handle the character writing if that makes sense. He honestly only really mentioned mostly how the script went through a good amount of rewrites but has been kicking around on his computer for a long while now so I'd say there's at least a bit of a chance that bits and pieces of a draft from earlier in his career (ie likely a better draft) make it in. As for Clerks 3, he talked a LOT about the throwaway like in one of the clerks or jay and silent bob movies where jay alluded to the fact that he'd suck silent bobs dick (or vice versa I get fuzzy on the details but if you've seen the movies you might remember the joke). Granted the interview discussed a lot of gay stuff since chasing amy was a gay movie but I'd say if you're asking me there's a 45-50% chance he just outright makes them gay or bisexual. Not kidding.

        >was literally forced to listen to 24+ hours of audio of him talking about specifics of production shit from his career and future projects.
        I'm assuming that all he wants is make films that allow him to cash on his fanbsse
        How's Dogma 2 coming along?

        He talked at length about the Weinstein controversy and his issues with the rights to dogma. Right before Weinstein went to jail he called him about a dogma 2 in a sort of last ditch attempt to garner support before the accusations hit but right now I'd say of all his movies dogma 2 probably has the least chance of coming out unless he can get the rights back from mirimax or whatever's going on legally.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >was literally forced to listen to 24+ hours of audio of him talking about specifics of production shit from his career and future projects.
      I'm assuming that all he wants is make films that allow him to cash on his fanbsse
      How's Dogma 2 coming along?

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        Also as for what he wants to be doing he's surprisingly a bit self aware about the fact that he's past his prime. He talked a lot about how he's mainly making movies to give fans more since they want more. He said that he felt like Chasing Amy was the hardest he ever tried to make a "serious" work of art. Honestly for the most part he seemed cool but just sort of like he bought into his own hype. I'd say he doesn't seem to have the sort of raw drive that a lot of younger artists have anymore, and he's aware of that to some degree. He was pretty discouraged by mallrats 1 bombing, from everything I heard if that had gone better then I think his career would have taken a completely different trajectory. Also it was very interesting listening to production details from all the movies he made, despite what a lot of people think it wasn't mainly even all his work, he had a core team of people he worked with, a lot of which on the production side aren't a part of some of his newer projects. I think he needed them to reign him in and tell him no.

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          >he had a core team of people he worked with, a lot of which on the production side aren't a part of some of his newer projects. I think he needed them to reign him in and tell him no.
          Which would be Scott Mosier, who stopped working with Smith closely/at all after Zack and Miri.

          • 2 years ago
            Anonymous

            Yeah I didn't want to name him cause I was worried that specifying might further reveal my identity if I talked more about the specific interviews I listened to but no one gives a shit honestly. He seemed like the actual heart and soul of the movies especially for mallrats where kevin basically made a moronic deal with harvey to make the movie for HALF the budget they needed and scott basically saved Kevins ass. He also was basically there to fix kevins directing frickups since Kevin basically wasn't a director for the most part. Scott seemed so cool, also heard like hours and hours of audio interviews from him as well. He talked a lot about how the plot of Chasing Amy was basically just Kevin extrapolating from a weird situation he (scott) had with guenivere turner. Super awkward topic in the interview.

            • 2 years ago
              Anonymous

              Everyone knows who Scott is, he founded View Askew with Smith. He and Smith did a weeky podcast together for years, probably stil do.

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                ik everyone knows who he is its just that I was worried about the people on the project I'm working on finding out who I was since I only listened to interviews from very specific people not everyone they interviewed but who fricking cares. Scott seems at least semi based especially compared to Kevin.

              • 2 years ago
                Anonymous

                Scott hasn't been on Smodcast in a year and has been off most of them for a while before that.

          • 2 years ago
            Anonymous

            Yeah I didn't want to name him cause I was worried that specifying might further reveal my identity if I talked more about the specific interviews I listened to but no one gives a shit honestly. He seemed like the actual heart and soul of the movies especially for mallrats where kevin basically made a moronic deal with harvey to make the movie for HALF the budget they needed and scott basically saved Kevins ass. He also was basically there to fix kevins directing frickups since Kevin basically wasn't a director for the most part. Scott seemed so cool, also heard like hours and hours of audio interviews from him as well. He talked a lot about how the plot of Chasing Amy was basically just Kevin extrapolating from a weird situation he (scott) had with guenivere turner. Super awkward topic in the interview.

            Also he mentioned that he recently got a greenlight from netflix for some project. I think it was something animated and he was very cagey about it. Sounds cool and I'm excited for it.

  17. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >last halfway decent movie he made was released in 2001
    >Clerks II, Jay and Silent Bob 2 are both horrible
    >Clerks III already in post-production and probably getting Mallrats 2
    this homosexual needs to give it up already, he's lost touch with whatever made him a decent filmmaker

  18. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    red dye #2

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      FREE MAHI MAHI

  19. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    He can't find funding or a production company, most likely. It's in "pre production", which means it's not funded yet. His shit when he goes back to the well yet again never make money.

  20. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    If it's anything like the scene Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back, I'm not interested.
    The only way Smith could save this movie is obtain from weed for a year, write a competent script about Brodie having a crisis about malls (specifically his) dying and it being a massive stupid plot to make malls popular again, and to somehow not put his daughter or any woke shit in it.
    But I know in my heart nothing like that will become of Mallrats 2 so I'm not really holding out hope here.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >and to somehow not put his daughter or any woke shit in it
      impossible on both, he has to shoehorn his untalented daughter into everything to get her a paycheck (which is good parenting, but bad for his movies) and he's gone full neolib moron

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        Is it good parenting when you just hand your kid everything and she never really has to achieve anything.

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          Yes, except when the kid is a troublemaker or degenerate, then it's just enabling

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Mallrats 2 is 20 years too late, everyone in the original have all aged out. The only reason he'll get Afleck back for a cameo is Ben has nothing better to do.
      The reality is, Smith's work just doesn't make money, regardless if he's making scraps from the DC table, or rehashing his old work. He lost whatever it was he had back in the day, and it's all just dull and lifeless. I was forced to sit through Jay and Bob II, and it still astounds me that with all of the experience Smith has now, he could make a movie that bad. He hasn't learned anything new about directing since the 90's - and you can tell he still doesn't know his fricking lenses. The Netflix deal he cut for the View Askew stuff is probably the only decent money he's seen in 20 years.
      I gave up on him when he burst into tears on Rogan. His creative gas tank is empty, has been for a long time. I can't think of anyone else in Hollywood who has gone back to the well - and failed every time - like he has.
      The only reason I'm still annoyed by his dumb ass is I realy liked his early work. It was rough, low budget, but it had charm. Those days are LONG over. I hate who he became, a blubbering onions based pothead.

  21. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    If only Kevin chose to shoot himself instead in 2001.

  22. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    I think he said on his podcast that it's going to be about T.S. and Brodie's daughters spending day at the mall. Sounds like Jay and Bob 2 but even worse.

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      >T.S. and Brodie's daughters spending day at the mall
      lmao daughter confirmed

  23. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >mallrats
    >no mall to rat in

    whats the point
    strip mallrats?

  24. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >shoot in 2021
    is this a threat?

  25. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Which was worse, Yoga Hosers or Jay and Silent Bob Reboot?

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Yoga Hosers

  26. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    What's a stink palm?

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      Why are you in a thread about mallrats 2 if you've never seen mallrats?

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        Because I hate Kevin Smith and enjoy Clerks

  27. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    He could make a Mallrats 2 in more of the original Clerks vein where it has kind of a dark atmosphere to it.
    >Brodie getting sad that mall culture is dying
    >TS gets divorced and starts hanging with Brody again
    >Jay and Silent Bob still hanging around
    >Willam is now thin and gave up the mall life
    >Michael Rooker is now an Amazon exec that plans to demolish the mall to make it an Amazon warehouse and the crew has to team up to stop it

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      No, he couldn’t. He doesn’t have the ability.

      • 2 years ago
        Anonymous

        It's also a dumb idea to begin with. City officials would 100% side with Amazon because it would create a lot of business and jobs while a dying mall is a drain. At best they would put up a small memorial to the mall outside the warehouse, and even that would be unlikely. That whole "we have to save the local mall!" story was played out in the 80's.

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          Amazon would just buy an empty lot if you're going to be realistic about it

        • 2 years ago
          Anonymous

          >That whole "we have to save the local mall!" story was played out in the 80's.
          Why would you have to save a mall in the 80s when malls were super popular back then?

  28. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    Why do I find this particularly offensive. What else are they going to make a movie about, the time I shit my diaper in 1997 (age 15)?

  29. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    I stopped watching Kevin Smith movies when he started putting his ugly, yeti of a daughter in all of them.

  30. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    >watching bunch of people in their 50s pretend it's the 90s for 90 minutes.
    nah, I'm good.

  31. 2 years ago
    Anonymous

    the Jay and Silent Bob Reboot is to movies
    as
    Borderlands 3 was to videogames

    • 2 years ago
      Anonymous

      I liked borderlands 3 though

      I'm trans btw if that matters

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