George was in the wrong here. You do not eat food from the trash especially when you’re at your gf’s parent’s house for the first time. Save that shit for when your at home.
below the rim, and I'd argue several inches above it as well, all constitutes "in" the trash if it's touching other stuff in the can. perhaps one of george's most insane moments, which means larry david definitely did it in real life.
>The thing I don't understand about the suicide person is the people who try to commit suicide, for some reason they don't die, and that's it. They stop trying. Why don't they just keep trying? What's changed? Is their life any better now? No. In fact. it's worse, because now they've found out here's one more thing you stink at. And that's why these people don't succeed in life to begin with. They give up too easy.
I say, pills don't work? Try a rope. Car won't start in the garage? Get a tune-up. There's nothing more rewarding than reaching a goal you've set for yourself.
Apparently, Larry David wrote that entire monologue on the spot when the proposed ending fell flat.
It was the first time Jason Alexander had performed it, obviously, after studying it for 20 minutes,
george explaining he doesn't want to pay for a prostitute because "why pay for something when if you try hard enough at it you can get it for free" always makes me laugh
>...and the israelites steal our money through their zionist occupied government and use the black man to bring drugs into our oppressed white minority communities
My favorite ep overall, believable scenario and I Love the ending.
The joke with Kramer betting on delayed flights/the weather at the airport with the Cowboy is from another ep I think, but that's really good too. >I'm not O'Brian! I'm not O'Brian!
this episode is always a joy to watch >huh, mothers day. WAITAMINUTE *frantic adding machine noises* >what do you think they do with the bottles? I dont know, theyre deranged >stealing the hobo's cart >the heist itself
Seinfeld doesn't really have jokes, it has bits. The few jokes it does have are mostly corny.
Compare to a show like Frasier - its jokes are great but its bits are campy.
now for me zero.
the show is not funny anymore for me ..im almost 50 years old and the show is boring.
not even larry david show is not funny. i watch the show but i dont laugh
the ones where the audience takes a while to get them, like:
>So let me ask you a question
about the tip cup, because I had a little thing with the calzone guy there this week. >I go to drop a buck in the tip jar and just as I'm about to drop it in, he looks the other way. >So then, as I'm leaving, he gives me a look like: "Thanks for nothing." >You got no credit. >Exactly. It's like I'm throwing a buck away. >I mean, if they don't notice it, what's the point? >So you don't make a habit of giving to the blind? >Not bills.
A joke has a set up and then a punchline and then it's done, an example being when jerry said "what's the deal with black people? They're not black and they're not people"
A bit is an ongoing thing where something funny is established and then they milk it for a little while, an example being when that girl thought george and jerry were gay and they keep saying "not that there's anything wrong with that" multiple times. Another example being Festivus with George's parents which was a bit that lasted a whole episode.
A gag is a semi absurd situation which is funny in and of itself and doesn't need a punchline, and is often just visual and slapstick with no words needed, an example being when kramer is cooking while he's showering.
Seinfeld is 95% bits with some gags that are usually kramer
>Simpsons gif
>R*ddit
>poor
The algorithm is pretty good
Kramer's nbomb when he got stressed out was unironically funny.
I'm partial to the face painter
He never said that.
I said Seinfeld, not Cosmo Kramer.
You're right he said "what is the deal with hitler?"
>Beeeeeelieve it or not George isn’t at home
PLEASE LEAVE A MESSAGEEEEEEEE AT THE BEEEEEP!
That’s a gag, not a joke.
the "getting caught picking hia nose at a red light" part, and cloae second the ruffled shirt
learn the difference between the a and s key, sandmonkey
This thread is making me believe Seinfeld is not funny at all.
SHE SLEEPS ON A COUCH! SHE'S A COUCHER!
George's childhood friend thinking he has gone insane in The Gum and 2 other episodes.
>it's from the institute!
>there's just no way we can keep you on
>but I don't even really work here
>that's what makes this so difficult
George was in the wrong here. You do not eat food from the trash especially when you’re at your gf’s parent’s house for the first time. Save that shit for when your at home.
below the rim, and I'd argue several inches above it as well, all constitutes "in" the trash if it's touching other stuff in the can. perhaps one of george's most insane moments, which means larry david definitely did it in real life.
even if it had just one little bite, does the idea of food absorbing the garbage fumes not bother him?
It's just paper, there's nothing decaying or rotting in that bin.
We don't know what was under the magazine in the bin, maybe it had some nasty shit
>The comedian seemed a little freaked out
I liked him talking about suicide.
>The thing I don't understand about the suicide person is the people who try to commit suicide, for some reason they don't die, and that's it. They stop trying. Why don't they just keep trying? What's changed? Is their life any better now? No. In fact. it's worse, because now they've found out here's one more thing you stink at. And that's why these people don't succeed in life to begin with. They give up too easy.
I say, pills don't work? Try a rope. Car won't start in the garage? Get a tune-up. There's nothing more rewarding than reaching a goal you've set for yourself.
I had not one but two involuntary chuckles reading this.
I also like how Jerry casually shits on homeless and mentally ill people in that episode where he dates that woman who volunteers
>They're a very eccentric group the shut-ins... because they're shut-in. Of course they're not locked in, they're free to go at any time
>It’s a big hole and a small mint. It’s a JUNIOR mint.
That’s why SSRI’s have warnings about suicide: people too depressed to off themselves finally get the nerve to go through with it.
If you take them and then stop, the idea of killing yourself will be euphoric.
For me, it’s Jerry freaking out about potentially getting raped at the dentist’s office and Elaine giving no fricks.
>So you might have been violated by two people while you were under the gas. You’re single!
>I’m damaged goods now.
>join the club.
Gaped
fricking hell I hated this meme at first but now I find it hilarious
>"oh yeah, that's a gape"
>*bends down and takes a deep sniff*
kek
What exactly is the deal with airline food?
They can’t have a kitchen on the plane for safety reasons
>Maybe i'll go visit my mother, she just bought me some new panties and they're all laid out for me
"What's the deal with white socks?"
That part in "The Race" where George pretends not to know jerry and they end up throwing insults at each other is one of my favorite scenes.
George going on a date and the girl dropping that her BF has the same watch. Same thing happened to me.
In college, in class, I told the girl I was in love with that I liked her socks. She told me her boyfriend gave them to her.
All these years later... I troll her on social media 🙁
I'm sorry bro
I still have to talk to my oneitis too. .I even have a gf now and I still want that girl.
The Chicken Roaster is the best episode. Not sure about THE best joke, that's a tough one.
Kramer banging on the table to get Joe DiMaggio's attention
I really like liked [kramer open door funny]
>Jr. Mint episode
>bubbleboy episode
Kino
Season 4 thru season 6 are peak 'feld. All episodes rarely top tier and all contain plenty of jokes.
>and you're not a stickler for a tickler!
>nooooot a stickler for a tickler
>stickler tickler
>stickler tickler
>stickler tickler
>stickler tickler
>Where the hell is the remote?
Jerry get iPad
jerry buy ipad
amazing payoff
Apparently, Larry David wrote that entire monologue on the spot when the proposed ending fell flat.
It was the first time Jason Alexander had performed it, obviously, after studying it for 20 minutes,
Felt like it
I wonder what the original ending was.
George walking into the ocean.
bump
Episode?
The Marine Biologist
I wish you frickers would help me add subtitles to this
"The sea was angry that day, my friends, like an old man trying to send back soup at a deli"
>If I was a woman I'd be down at the dock waiting for the fleet to come in.
Its the wood that makes it good
>Has he ever been married?
>N-no...
>Has he ever been close?
>He once spent a weekend with a woman...
>[Laugh track]
Well Cinemaphile, are you less incel than George? Have you ever spent a weekend with a woman?
Actually, I have. And it was pretty good
I've never even touched a woman. I haven't even talked to a woman about anything but work in a decade at least.
Crazy how people used to want to live in New York City not too long ago
george explaining he doesn't want to pay for a prostitute because "why pay for something when if you try hard enough at it you can get it for free" always makes me laugh
Seinfeld has jokes? Is this a boomer joke or something?
>...and the israelites steal our money through their zionist occupied government and use the black man to bring drugs into our oppressed white minority communities
>You're not gonna open with that, are you?
My favorite ep overall, believable scenario and I Love the ending.
The joke with Kramer betting on delayed flights/the weather at the airport with the Cowboy is from another ep I think, but that's really good too.
>I'm not O'Brian! I'm not O'Brian!
>fish can't drive
nearly killed me
snickers with knife and fork
season 8 was the best. on this issue, there can be no debate
>Oh yeah? Well, the jerk store called, they're running out of you!
kramer's physical comedy is the funniest stuff on the show and it isn't even close
simpleton
best episode is the one where Jerry dates the high school girl.
That whole plot with Sugar Ray Leonard was pretty funny
I enjoy the NBC meta-plot about the “Jerry” pilot.
the spit then stops, IN MID AIR, mind you
Gay vibes from Hernandez.
Kek, reminds me that they did that joke about circumcising Jerry's finger. That was pretty good.
this episode is always a joy to watch
>huh, mothers day. WAITAMINUTE *frantic adding machine noises*
>what do you think they do with the bottles? I dont know, theyre deranged
>stealing the hobo's cart
>the heist itself
Mugging the little old lady for a loaf of marble rye bread.
Seinfeld doesn't really have jokes, it has bits. The few jokes it does have are mostly corny.
Compare to a show like Frasier - its jokes are great but its bits are campy.
Kenny Rogers Chicken.
now for me zero.
the show is not funny anymore for me ..im almost 50 years old and the show is boring.
not even larry david show is not funny. i watch the show but i dont laugh
before I started watching Seinfeld I'd always thought this gif is from old Indian movie
damn youre so cool
i need to suck your dick asap
The metajokes, Like Elaine saying "I don't really give a sh*t." as she walks into Jerry's bathroom.
the ones where the audience takes a while to get them, like:
>So let me ask you a question
about the tip cup, because I had a little thing with the calzone guy there this week.
>I go to drop a buck in the tip jar and just as I'm about to drop it in, he looks the other way.
>So then, as I'm leaving, he gives me a look like: "Thanks for nothing."
>You got no credit.
>Exactly. It's like I'm throwing a buck away.
>I mean, if they don't notice it, what's the point?
>So you don't make a habit of giving to the blind?
>Not bills.
Hey Jerry look what I got.
God Winona was fricking hot.
The one where the israeli character nebbishly obsessed about something inconsequential to the point that it ruined his plans.
I liked the ones where kramer taped police tape everywhere especially the broken egg heh
Also,bWhats the difference between a joke, a gag and a bit?
A joke has a set up and then a punchline and then it's done, an example being when jerry said "what's the deal with black people? They're not black and they're not people"
A bit is an ongoing thing where something funny is established and then they milk it for a little while, an example being when that girl thought george and jerry were gay and they keep saying "not that there's anything wrong with that" multiple times. Another example being Festivus with George's parents which was a bit that lasted a whole episode.
A gag is a semi absurd situation which is funny in and of itself and doesn't need a punchline, and is often just visual and slapstick with no words needed, an example being when kramer is cooking while he's showering.
Seinfeld is 95% bits with some gags that are usually kramer
The best joke is when people says it is the best comedy show. Can't top that.
The money he made from the show
Why's it called Ovaltine?
It should be called Roundtine.
>It had no face, no personality, very dull. It was like a Martian
I liked the bit where Bryan Cranston took a huge whiff of the gas before he started operating.
>you ate more bread?!
Sodomy is a prerequisite.
which is the truth in hollywood, it's an inside joke