>what business does an Elf, a Man, and a Manlet have in the Riddermark, speak quickly!
>uhh nothing we are friends of the king we promise
>oh really? why didn't you say so? you're free to go, also accept this gift of 2 precious warhorses, and I'll also loudly proclaim what direction we are heading because you've completely earned my trust in this 1 minute meeting. glad you're not spies of sauron's man, that would be really bad for us if you were!
What was he THINKING??
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>trusts a trio of morons
>they save his kingdom and restore him to honor
Seems like he did the right thing.
They say they're tracking a band of Uruks. The Rohan have just killed a band of Uruks. So they know they aren't lying. When they know why they're tracking them and their reaction they know they are telling the truth.
Saruman has all of that information as well though
>we were tracking our friends
An easy lie
Saruman lost all subtlety after getting Uruk super soldiers, and why would he use a freakshow trio when he already mindraped the king?
he trusted his gut that they were being sincere and it paid off big time for him and his people. it's a white pypo thing, don't worry about it.
>it's a white pypo thing,
Bingo! It's like one of those attributes the Smithsonian says are White priveliges; hard work, being on time, knowing your father. You wouldn't get it.
Quads of truth. Not everyone gets to enjoy a high trust society, sorry orcs.
>judeo-christian
I hate anglos
Judeo-Christianity has fricking nothing to do with modern judaism beyond a couple linguistic syllables. Congrats, you're an idiot who gets his entire worldview from anonymous shitposts.
don't choke on the foreskin there rabbi
>*angry npc noises*
Yeah, I know. You aren't capable of serious thought. You're a demoralized, propagandized child and having it revealed you've gotten every political opinion you think you believe from anonymous shitposts is aggravating and makes you lash out to protect your ego.
>incoherent screeching
kek, go on then what does judeo-christian mean beyond a barely 200 year old term coined to smuggle israelites under the protective wing of normie american christians, christians and israelites who had a shall we say strained relationship for the past 2000 years
>educate me in the form of propaganda shitposts, it's the only way I can get information
Your entire outlook on reality is wrong, I can't educate you, you're like 20 years behind what you should have been studying and researching yourself. You know nothing about Christianity, pre-Christian monotheism, or modern day judaism, you just parrot shitposts you got on the internet and think it's your tribe. I'm not "arguing" with you or debating you or trying to win you over to "my side". I'm pointing out you're a demoralized, propagandized NPC who's incapable of thinking in anything other than the form of an anonymous internet shitpost, in the hopes that someday you wake up with a start and realize it's an ineffective way to reveal the truth or experience reality.
as expected, and how furiously you type these replies is palpable kek
my moral is at an all time high thanks, the israelite gets named everywhere i look and all you can do is have impotent meltdowns
Are you the guy who claims Anglo-Saxons are the real tribes of Judea, or was that some dude
NTA but shortly after Christ's crucification and the resulting chimpout from the uh...modern day israelites, the Hebrews in Judea would scatter mostly into Europe, and some going to Nigeria for some reason lol. They would be bred out of existence in Europe though, so in a sense Europeans are holding the torch for the Hebrew tribes, but that's kinda immaterial at this point. Still funny to point and laugh at modern day israelites though still claiming to be chosenites when God explicitly stated he would cast the tribes into the wind
•You worship a Semitic, monotheistic deity יהוה from the Middle East Levant
•YHVH, Yahweh יהוה , Elohim, meaning the Living God in Hebrew, along with his other 7 Hebrew names mentioned in the Bible
•Claim your "Holy Lands" are a israeli desert in the Middle East that you fight and crusade for, instead of your natural, ancestral homelands such as Europa, Hyperborea Thule and the forests
•Speak in Hebrew tongue; hallelujah, amen, "messiah," these are words not indigenous to you
•In your own lore claim descent from hebrews such as Noah and the Seed of Abraham
•Olaf Tryggvason, Olaf II (Norway) slaughtered, maimed, blinded, tortured their own people for not worshiping יהוה but their indigenous Gods
•Charlemagne and the Franks wholesale slaughtered 4,500 surrendered Saxons for not worshiping yahweh יהוה
•Your spiritual existence revolves around Bethlehem and a rabbi
•Burnt down and destroyed European forests, groves, trees and sacred sites because they weren't יהוהfor the glory of YHVH
------------
>"so sick of israelites"
>worships the literal monotheistic deity of the semites, Yahweh
>speaks in hebrew tongue (hallelujah, amen, messiah etc)
>calls israeli land your holy land in the middle east
>name yourself hebrew names (john, david, peter, Matt, Sam, Tom, Jake, Ben, Josh etc)
>LARP as a literal israelite descendant of Noah and Abraham
this is your brain on israeli cum. I am better than you. I never wore a mask, never vaccinated, never scanned a single QR code, never put on a single b***h cloth on my face once. You're a b***h, which is reflected in your spirituality
Jews worship Satan. Their father.
Next.
hello rabbi
For the past 1,500 years you've been naming yourself and your entire race hebrew israelite names like: Matt, Josh, Ben, Jake, John, David, Peter, Sam, Tom etc.
For the past 1,500 years your entire race has known more about hebrew israelite mythology like Noah's Arc and Moses than you do about white European epics such as Hrolfr Kraki and Bodvar Bjarki (who you don't know at all)
Your entire existence is israeli. Down to the way you think. Culturally, spiritually, mentally; you are domesticated cattle. Golem
The Old Testament was largely a semiticizing of Indo-European mythology obtained via Bablyon and Persia and Christianity took that mythology and made it Indo-European again.
The only reason you know about those stories is because a (literate) Christian wrote them down. You're a projective asshat thinking you're a special snowflake because you read some sagas? The absolute arrogance, along with the rampant off-topic impotent rants to cause discord whike claiming other people are golems? Hilarious, the only poster more pathetic is the vaxy moron who uses npc wojak images (the most self-ironic form of avatarhomosexualry possible on Cinemaphile).
I wouldn't be surprised if you were really a butthurt brownie or smallhat yourself acting like this as a point of subversion.
woah woah woah! cool it with the anti-moriagoblinism
>you read some sagas
Let's not go that far.
Odin is a reference to the Tribe of Dan (Io-Dan) you fricking imbecile.
His one-eyed status is a reference to Jupiter/Jove/Jehovah.
Stop being a israelite's glory hole.
rude
Please elaborate more? Is there a place I can read more on this? I'm genuinely interested in this
I just hate the term altogether.
Most weak people hate reality
You're no exception, you gay vaccinated homosexual
Put your mask back on, coward
NPC sheep bleating
Every fricking thread.
It's weird reading this knowing it was definitely put together by some bitter yid, where a lot of these points would be otherwise reasonable and fine but the author feels they have to be worded in a barely subtlely negative way or throw in nothing quotes like "bland is better" and "you get what you deserve", like what the frick? Nobody ultimately believes this shit except sociopaths born with silver spoons in their ass
At first it starts out like "haha those are actually really good values this is so ironic lol" but towards the end it just gets bitter, seething, and hateful lmao
"bland is best"? said no fricking white person ever.
people here say it all the time
WHYTE PYPO DUN PUT SPICE IN DEY WATUH???? AYO!
dass rayciss
What is that filleted yellow vegetable at the bottom right? Is that squash?
>Judeo-Christian
Dispensationalism was a giant mistake.
>no tolerance for deviation from single god
most white people are atheists lmao
based quads, go figure that some people cant into high trust societies or understand a word of honor
>christianity is the norm
And that's where things went downhill.
Nice helmet.
she is way to close to that artifact. her breath is accelerating the oxidization process
It's mostly a reconstruction.
in 30 years from femboy to chad.
Gods I was strong back then.
me the second from the right
>They call me The Chonk
and there is space for my big penis
it’s 95% wax
Why the hell would vikings wear wax helmets?
>least hunchbacked anthropologist
Don't diss my wife.
>experience, identity, representation
>it's 200 pages of why the anglo-saxons were actually black
we wuz vikangz
>Vikings married their slaves
>according to reliable historical evidence
>doesn't link to the evidence
>doesn't link to any source at all
>no names are mentioned or credentials given
This is how you know they pulled it out of their ass.
I bet she gives great helmet
She's so cute. I want to go a date with her and let her go on and on about Anglo-Saxon history.
Could talk about swards in to the early hours.
Wife material.
She probably posts on Cinemaphile
Biggest cope I’ve ever seen
this lmfao. Women are such losers it's unreal.
You could talk about how you're both vaccinated gay homosexuals who wore masks for 2+ years like lobotomised gimps for a virus that didn't even exist too
Talk about that, how you're both domesticated cattle and you'll never be a real man or worthy in the eyes of your ancestors, as the vaccinated b***h muzzled dog cuck you are
relax buddy nobody cares about any of that anymore
You're not even human. You're domesticated cattle. An animal in human skin
Anyone who ever masked or vaxed doesn't have a soul. You're livestock, artificially kept alive by governments and corporations for no reason at all
you gotta let it go and move on everyone else has
Stop being so melodramatic kid
>pure elf
>on sauron's side
Traipsing around with an Elf is equivalent to an immutable good boy badge.
Also the fact that Aragorn literally flagged them down. And Eomer may well have known who Aragorn was.
Eomer gave them the horses because he felt bad from thinking he and his men had killed their two hobbits along with the Uruks.
>Eomer gave them the horses because he felt bad from thinking he and his men had killed their two hobbits along with the Uruks.
He's just like my dad. Gives material gifts by way of apology for causing irreparable emotional damage.
>causing irreparable emotional damage
did he accidentally murder your brother or something?
the wrong kid died
Did you get anything cool anon?
Legolas is super famous but Eomer didn't recognize him at first. When he did he knew giving the horses was a wise investment.
huh? Legoland is a nobody, and if he was famous he would not have been allowed to be apart of the fellowship the same way Glorfindel wasn't
Legolas is an elven prince so presumably people would know his name, he just didn't have any rep besides being Thranduil's kid. Glorfindel is a living legend of the First Age. There's a big difference.
people in middle earth don't even know what's in the forest a couple of miles from their home town
Eomer isn't just some random farmer though. Royal families would be at least familiar with the name of other leaders and their families. Especially in Middle Earth given there are only like maybe 6 or 7 really important ones amongst the Free People (Dale, Erebor, The Woodland Realm, Lothorian, Rivendell, Minas Tirith/Gondor, Edoras/Rohan).
Mirkwood elves are notoriously insular, for as long as he's lived it would not surprise if Thranduil has met exactly zero members of the House of Eorl
I'm not saying they meet up and chill with each other I just mean that as part of his upbringing Eomer would at least be taught who is in charge of where and their family. Also I'm pretty sure word would have gotten out from the Council Of Elrond about what happened and who had attended even if no specifics about the Fellowship and the ring were mentioned.
Eomer would not have been taught Jack Shit other than Don't frick the horses, please.
>as part of his upbringing Eomer would at least be taught
Dude wasn't even in line for the throne until his cousin died five minutes ago.
skill issue
>Dale
I know they end up in their own struggle with the Easterlings at The Lonely Mountain but it's funny how no one even considers their existence in LotR. Were they just too far out to bother with?
A lot of people were too far out or too busy with their own missions/lives in LoTR. My man Cirdan, though a legendary elf, only got a mention or two.
his problem was that he just wanted to frick fish all day so that is why he never left the coast
Honestly? Based. Beware the only elf that lived so long that he grew a beard.
by that logic Galadriel should have a beard
She did, just not on her face.
Ah, yes, back of the knee. Knew it.
If it ain’t norf it ain’t right
>called Nor-mans
>invade from the south
who writes this shit??
this
people in medieval England didn't even know who was king half the time
#
#
So Gollum knows multiple ways into Mordor including the path through the magic swamp of death and through the giant spider's lair, and you are telling me he's only been there one time?
he seared it into his memory due to the seethe of losing the ring
That was over 60 years ago. For that matter, why doesn't Gollum age rapidly after losing the ring, like Bilbo does?
Gollum had made a deal with Shelob to bring her food instead of eating him since he was a bag of fricking bones. This is why he knows his way through her lair because he brought her food. Finding a route through the dead marshes isn't really too unbelievable, it's just a maze.
Which Osprey?
Alfred was a gay and woman warriors are fricking moronic.
I think Edward the Elder was cooler and not only because he was the main man in the isles for the entire time he ruled.
This is like someone painting Margaret Thatcher personally leading the charge up Mount Tumbledown
>this kills the misogynist
Go back to /tg/ moron
>yet another hackson thread
uh-oh lotrbros they're onto us what's our response?
god I wish that was me
ryona getting a bit weird
A chink in my armor.
Hehe
this is why medieval infantry stood 5 to 8 ranks deep btw
Should've had some pikes
knights use poleaxes not pikes
this is so dumb. as soon as the cavalry stop moving they are dead as a doornail.
That's why you don't stop moving.
It’s a movie moron they’re just getting a 3 second shot
That's not nearly enough to make a movie
Damn that looks bad ass, what movie is this from? How the FRICK did they make sure nobody gets seriously hurt, including the animals?
the movie was The Sadness and every single person in that webm was killed.
>nobody using their spear
I understand having a bunch of horses run up towards you is scary as frick but I'm wondering why they didn't have pikes or longer spears in the first place. Those look like one handed spears you're supposed to wield in combination with a shield.
Anon, that's a reenactment. They're not actually trying to kill the horses. No HEMA LARP is ever going to be an accurate look into acient battle because they never actually have the mentality of fighting to the death.
>They're not actually trying to kill the horses
The horse sure was trying to kill the dude at the front though.
And I know HEMA isn't 100% accurate you homosexual, if it were 99% of fights would be won by the guy with the spear.
we need to bring back irl arena kino
i doubt many people would charge that recklessly if the other side was willing to hit them with sharpened blades
you underestimate the gauls who were famous for reckless charges
they were famous for losing too
except for that one village
Good point. As long as no one mentions that time where they sacked Rome. Or raided their way through Europe all the way to Asia Minor and established their own kingdom there.
1. Everyone sacked Rome at some point. Germans and Huns made it a sunday pasttime event towards the end.
2. They didn't "raid" through Europe, they migrated.
3. Galatia was barely a kingdom, every else around them thought they were really weird and basically ignored them.
And where are they now? Sounds like the Gaulish nation and culture must be doing very well for itself
>And where are they now?
France?
Oh nice, didn’t realise French was a celtic language and not bastardised latin!
Language =/= populace, you utmost homosexual.
They went the way of the mighty Roman Empire, which was alsdo destroyed so they must have been losers too.
after throwing javelins it makes more sense
>Male human warrior
Around elves, watch yourselves
Sauce?
had a professor in college who taught a war in lit class
covered illiad during the semester
said the depiction of someone wielding a 25ft spear was unrealistic fantasy
immediately I thought of jousting and how stupid his comment was
he admitted near the end of the semester he was asked to teach the class despite having no knowledge on the subject
Lances are like 15ft max
Impressive
i forget how kino this movie is, it may be flawed but its about the best we'll get
Kek big guy looks like such a jobber when you slow it down and watch him
>whoa he's moving to my left
>i better do a slow overhand motion to my front right
having an elf, especially legolas, in your squad gives you a lot of good credit. also aragorn probably has a tinge of magical charisma
Ah yes, Grima Ben Wormtongue, my trusted advisor.
Grima Wormtongue sounds like the name of a Harry Potter character
definitely ravenclaw
His name was just Grima. The people of Rohan took to calling him Wormtongue because of the obvious effect he had on the king with his conniving whispers and gossip and lies.
it was a high trust society
I'm sorry ur black
he realized they were good guys when none of them were named Blacksoul Eviltraitor
germanic roots man.
Just white people things.
Browns would never understand.
> What was he THINKING??
probably “oh shit my sword just fell out of my sheath when I mounted my horse, better hope nobody noticed play it off”
>What was he THINKING??
Probably this:
>I am an Old English professor’s vision of what Anglo-Saxons would have been like if they had been a horse culture. I need to treat this meeting like an epic hero would, like might happen in Beowulf.
Is it schizophrenia? I heard they're an at risk group
how did this devolve to covid talk? it does not pertain at all to Lord of the Rings!
Jesus said to them, “If God were your Father, you would love me, for I came from God and I am here. I came not of my own accord, but he sent me. Why do you not understand what I say? It is because you cannot bear to hear my word. You are of your father the devil, and your will is to do your father's desires. He was a murderer from the beginning, and does not stand in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks out of his own character, for he is a liar and the father of lies.
John 8:42-44
the bible also talks about huge donkey wieners and their massive loads so
Yeah that passage talks about a prostitute who's thinking about her past lover who was hung "like a donkey". Commenting on what a disgusting prostitute she is. Ezekiel 23.
Karl Urban was the perfect cast for Eomer, no?
Yeah!
Name one (1) thing that Sauron did wrong.
you can read a lot by looking into someone's eyes. Maybe you don't have the eyes? Also,
>I'll also loudly proclaim what direction we are heading because you've completely earned my trust
who or what is he suppose to be fearful of? He seeks conflict.
it is ogre now
-gandalf
In russian translation it was
>who are you why not in the army?
>by god we served our time and returning home currently soldier bro!
>oh you are ok yiou are ok come drink with us then
I hope english translations of russian literature aren't equally as butchered
to be fair it sounds like its more of a localization issue over a translation one
the cube must grow
He instinctively recognises Aragorn is an honourable man who deserves help.
how so
Real recognize real
elrond should have killed isildur and took the ring
White man's intuition. He only didnt trust the manlet
i like eowyn
Aragorn literally fought with Theoden (movie canon). Eomer knew Aragorn by name.
If the Elves are corrupted it's gg for the middle earth, so he had to assume Legoland was a good guy.
Gloin fought in the Battle of the five armies against orcs, and Aragorn says Gimli is his son.
You're moronic lmao.
eomer did not know any numenorian names.
You're such a homosexual it's unreal.
proof?
It's obvious by how you type and the fact that you're obsessed with over analyzing this fantastic movie while completely ignoring context and any previously established story.
are you telling me that you recognize my prose
you reek of reddit, unironically go back newbie
This frick has no right to challenge the party. Rohan has nothing that would qualify it as a nation with boundaries worth respecting. No roads, no forts. The so called border doesn't have so much as a fence or single watch tower. There is no such thing as Rohan, just an empty lawless plain with a few decrepit unwalled villages and tiny hill fort with a stable and feasting hall. There's no reason to parlay with these riders with anymore respect than one would give to a group of bandits, since there is functionally no difference between the riders of Rohan and bandits as both have just as much legal authority.
Serious question: Why didn't they use the Horn at Helm's Deep throughout the battle? Apparently due to the echo in the valley it causes a massive ear-shattering vibration, which is why Theodan and his entourage manage to plow through so many Uruks during their death charge, which isn't communicated very well in the movie. So why not use that shit throughout the entire battle?
Because it was a *death charge*. What, are they going to shatter their own men's eastdrums into delirium unceasing for hours?
The horns were directed towards the valley. They stood behind the effective range of the sound's effect.
The Gauls? And where are they now?
middle earth is a morally stark world. he can tell they aren't evil because they aren't dressed in black, look like shit, and have spooky eyes/skin/hair/nails/teeth or some combination of those. i'm not denigrating the story either just thay being an evil prick in LOTR literally makes you look shittier. the only notable figure to be an exception to this was sauron himself