Someone here said it best; even if they start the next season with master chief waking up and realizing that every episode that happened previously was just a dream and they stuck to the story of the video game, it still couldn’t save this shitty show.
>Takes screenshot of one second of the episode >Immediately runs to shitter to complain >Stays there all night arguing now that he found current thing to cry about
We need to genocide people like this in our society. I'm tired of having to listen to people cry and moan and whine because they saw something that triggered them. Change the channel homie don't make this my fricking problem
Normal people don't like your gay shit. We are NEVER going to like your gay shit. And no amount of forcing it down our throats will change it. Now go do your second enema and take some pain pills so you can let Jerald frick your ass.
>Or you could browse reddit instead if mocking gay content bothers you so much
Once again you see something that bothers you and you cry trying to make it go away. Lmao
Just watched the first two episodes with my bro. It seems they're gonna try and shoehorn the plot of Halo Reach in this somehow, except without Noble team. Apparently the covies can just go to reach and nobody notices; there's still no ships in orbit, no satellite stations, no nothing, just like in season 1.
The last thing I anticipated from this season was a gay albino Black person though, that's for sure. I guess the lack of homosexual characters in season 1 had higher priority in the list of things to "fix" than the plot itself.
Warning other people that there's homosexual shit in it is a service to society.
The morons who wrote this shit focused more on the ESG bait than the actual show. This season has been shit so far.
I get they're about to show the fall of reach, but it's been boring as hell.
Playing Halo as a young lad, I fondly remember the missions where all the spartans removed their armor and got pep talks from an interracial gay blind albino couple.
the life experiences of a sheltered liberal city writer do not need to be translated for normies and represented in a sci fi show with high expectations from the intended audience who knows the source material well enough to see the plot obviously veering off
Media isn't reality, though. There isn't a necessity for it to feature anything real. Even by it showing something "real" it transforms it into the unreal, inherently.
>Halo season 1 >a big plot point is that the Spartan helmets are recording everything and the USNC can monitor all the spartans >Halo season 2 >Masterchief claims there were Covenant on Sanctuary, but he has no proof other than the fact his helmet recorded everything >Halo season 1 >The USNC cannot understand the Covenant language >they use Makee to learn a few words >Halo season 2 >random soldier that hears a covenant broadcast can translate it perfectly >Halo season 2 episode 1 >Halsey is imprisoned but does not know by who >keeps asking the attendants who their creator is and they die over and over again >episode 3 it is revealed the clones are copies of the director of ONI's sister >during a conversation, Halsey reveals she remembers everything about his sister to him >so why the frick was she grilling the clone attendants in episode 1 if she knew this whole time? >Halo season 1 >asian girl is told there is a portal on Madrigal she has to stay by and guard for Masterchief >season 2 she has been on a slave ship for six months >for some reason she decides to remove her tracking beacon in public after it was already shown she was in a safe secure place just one scene earlier >why didn't she remove it six months ago? >Halo season 1 >Masterchief fricking died at the end and Cortana took over
Some of that stuff might be justifiable if this was episode 139 of a show that aired in the '90s. It would be unreasonable to expect a random writer to keep continuity of something so long when access to earlier episodes wouldn't have been easy. But this is a show with a 9 episode first season, that's available to stream. At some point, you've got to realize that if the people making the show clearly don't care, neither should you.
All they had to do was vaguely follow the games. Follow a bunch of oo-rah marines dealing with the last days of the civil war, then the aliens arrive on Harvest and frick shit up, show some desperate human battles where we lose a hundred ships to destroy fifteen, and end with Reach being lost and the Pillar of Autumn getting sent away in the last moments. Season 2 can be all Halo 1. It was so easy. It was SO fricking easy. I don't get it, I really don't get it. I know that moronic women fricked it up, but why, surely there are women out there who'd just read the fricking books. Why are they so incompetent? How does this happen?
Yeah, all they had to do was throw in one or two femStarbuck Mary Sue types, have them frick a Black person, and they would’ve gotten the ESG shit out of the way. Why they thought letting women write the actual story was a good idea is beyond me.
craziest thing about that thread isnt the gay kiss
its the fact they completely redesigned cortana in the new season to look like kiki wolfkill , who took over the halo franchise and killed XBOX live by starting bans based on voice chat.
Hello everyone in this meeting we're going to discuss some ways to improve business, specifically the xbox division. As you know Playstation and other game consoles are taking quite a chunk of our revenue. So any ideas?
Yes you in the back with the Mrs Swan haircut.
>i think we should permanently ban 90% of our playerbase
craziest thing about that thread isnt the gay kiss
its the fact they completely redesigned cortana in the new season to look like kiki wolfkill , who took over the halo franchise and killed XBOX live by starting bans based on voice chat.
Saw a video from the first episode where "rebels" used a mounted machine gun that did nothing, then a spartan used it and it tore through covenant troops like paper.
Decided not to watch it and instead laugh at morons who do. Feels like I made the right call.
Pretending to be a troony just to get (You)s is still troony behavior. Allah willing Americans will be skinned alive and raped in the streets for your sodomy and pseudo-sodomy.
>spartans are just allowed to take their armor off and go wherever the hell they want despite the fact they were on almost constant deployments throughout the war
i hope the writers get kidnapped by the taliban
There's a rumor going around it was supposed to be a TV show based on Mass Effect and that makes much more sense than whatever the frick they've created.
Its all shit
Someone here said it best; even if they start the next season with master chief waking up and realizing that every episode that happened previously was just a dream and they stuck to the story of the video game, it still couldn’t save this shitty show.
>cuckime
gaylo
>Tranime avatar
master crust
We laughed but he was right
He’s married, has a kid, and works in finance. Chad Warden won.
Chad
>Takes screenshot of one second of the episode
>Immediately runs to shitter to complain
>Stays there all night arguing now that he found current thing to cry about
We need to genocide people like this in our society. I'm tired of having to listen to people cry and moan and whine because they saw something that triggered them. Change the channel homie don't make this my fricking problem
Crusty af fr
Normal people don't like your gay shit. We are NEVER going to like your gay shit. And no amount of forcing it down our throats will change it. Now go do your second enema and take some pain pills so you can let Jerald frick your ass.
>You MUST listen to me cry about current thing! This is important! My feelings are IMPORTANT!
hate threads are funny doe
>Change the channel homie don't make this my fricking problem
you could also not reply, or close the thread/browser/Cinemaphile. stupid toddler
No I need to make you feel bad for acting like such a fricking woman about something you could just not watch.
Or you could browse reddit instead if mocking gay content bothers you so much
>Or you could browse reddit instead if mocking gay content bothers you so much
Once again you see something that bothers you and you cry trying to make it go away. Lmao
Just watched the first two episodes with my bro. It seems they're gonna try and shoehorn the plot of Halo Reach in this somehow, except without Noble team. Apparently the covies can just go to reach and nobody notices; there's still no ships in orbit, no satellite stations, no nothing, just like in season 1.
The last thing I anticipated from this season was a gay albino Black person though, that's for sure. I guess the lack of homosexual characters in season 1 had higher priority in the list of things to "fix" than the plot itself.
Warning other people that there's homosexual shit in it is a service to society.
You made it your problem by deciding to open the thread and reply to it, kys
Anon I'm sorry that image left you with unresolved trauma. Maybe find a fricking therapist instead of crying about it?
The morons who wrote this shit focused more on the ESG bait than the actual show. This season has been shit so far.
I get they're about to show the fall of reach, but it's been boring as hell.
>cry and moan and whine because they saw something that triggered them
this is exactly what you're doing in your post though
>The propaganda doesn't exist if you close your eyes!
>Just let society be subverted; who cares bro?
I don't get that pic
Lurk more..
Do you realise that the normalisation of homosexuality is a symptom of impending societal collapse?
thank you nixon
Playing Halo as a young lad, I fondly remember the missions where all the spartans removed their armor and got pep talks from an interracial gay blind albino couple.
It has some interesting parts. I like that Asteroid base and how the civilian architecture on Reach is very close the original.
I really like john Halo he's a cool gay who kills aliens and doesn't afraid of anything
Ah yes the Master Chief, just like I imagined him under the helmet while playing all the games.
more like GAYLO
Innie propaganda
Halo? More like CRUSTO, amirite!?
AHAHAHAHA
>Why must tv shows feature things that exist in real life?
>Why doesn't 100% of the media cater to me?
>Why didn't ANY of the media cater to me
FTFY
the life experiences of a sheltered liberal city writer do not need to be translated for normies and represented in a sci fi show with high expectations from the intended audience who knows the source material well enough to see the plot obviously veering off
Media isn't reality, though. There isn't a necessity for it to feature anything real. Even by it showing something "real" it transforms it into the unreal, inherently.
kind of unrealistic since they aren't wearing diapers due to their anal blowout.
>sneed in the xitter username
Why are you screenshotting your own tweets, brownoid?
hey thats thats my thread lol
look mom im on Cinemaphile
have you gotten any funny responses yet?
go back to /vt/ wyatt
Halo?
>Halo season 1
>a big plot point is that the Spartan helmets are recording everything and the USNC can monitor all the spartans
>Halo season 2
>Masterchief claims there were Covenant on Sanctuary, but he has no proof other than the fact his helmet recorded everything
>Halo season 1
>The USNC cannot understand the Covenant language
>they use Makee to learn a few words
>Halo season 2
>random soldier that hears a covenant broadcast can translate it perfectly
>Halo season 2 episode 1
>Halsey is imprisoned but does not know by who
>keeps asking the attendants who their creator is and they die over and over again
>episode 3 it is revealed the clones are copies of the director of ONI's sister
>during a conversation, Halsey reveals she remembers everything about his sister to him
>so why the frick was she grilling the clone attendants in episode 1 if she knew this whole time?
>Halo season 1
>asian girl is told there is a portal on Madrigal she has to stay by and guard for Masterchief
>season 2 she has been on a slave ship for six months
>for some reason she decides to remove her tracking beacon in public after it was already shown she was in a safe secure place just one scene earlier
>why didn't she remove it six months ago?
>Halo season 1
>Masterchief fricking died at the end and Cortana took over
Some of that stuff might be justifiable if this was episode 139 of a show that aired in the '90s. It would be unreasonable to expect a random writer to keep continuity of something so long when access to earlier episodes wouldn't have been easy. But this is a show with a 9 episode first season, that's available to stream. At some point, you've got to realize that if the people making the show clearly don't care, neither should you.
Ah... after a long week of work, i finally have time to sit down and browse Cinemaphile. Can't wait to see some fresh memes and shitp-ACK
here is the thread
I included some other content. Contain your rage at the last two tweets
https://twitter.com/locksneedshartn/status/1758323082689683913
crusty show
All they had to do was vaguely follow the games. Follow a bunch of oo-rah marines dealing with the last days of the civil war, then the aliens arrive on Harvest and frick shit up, show some desperate human battles where we lose a hundred ships to destroy fifteen, and end with Reach being lost and the Pillar of Autumn getting sent away in the last moments. Season 2 can be all Halo 1. It was so easy. It was SO fricking easy. I don't get it, I really don't get it. I know that moronic women fricked it up, but why, surely there are women out there who'd just read the fricking books. Why are they so incompetent? How does this happen?
Yeah, all they had to do was throw in one or two femStarbuck Mary Sue types, have them frick a Black person, and they would’ve gotten the ESG shit out of the way. Why they thought letting women write the actual story was a good idea is beyond me.
cortana click hide
>still triggered by gays
grow up
poxxed post
craziest thing about that thread isnt the gay kiss
its the fact they completely redesigned cortana in the new season to look like kiki wolfkill , who took over the halo franchise and killed XBOX live by starting bans based on voice chat.
LMFAOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
holy shit
TIL. While I didn't recieve the banhammer since I played H4 offline I had no idea she was a loony.
>reddit: the post
Man, why are WOMEN allowed to fricking say and do anything other than "Yes" and making sandwiches respectively LMAOAOAO
Hello everyone in this meeting we're going to discuss some ways to improve business, specifically the xbox division. As you know Playstation and other game consoles are taking quite a chunk of our revenue. So any ideas?
Yes you in the back with the Mrs Swan haircut.
>i think we should permanently ban 90% of our playerbase
BRILLIANT! You're promoted!
>ban 90% of players
>class action lawsuit opens 6 months later
>kill voice chat entirely
>xbox live is basically dead
>rumors that Microsoft thinking about getting out of consoles entirely
women, not even once
>they actually did this
lmfao
>put a vegana in charge of a brand
>brand implodes
When will they learn?
they wont
>Company is a wolf in the industry
>Hires woman named Wolfkill
Why a trans man is playing Cortana now?
>they crusted halo
crustbros, im crusting
new crust just dropped
/crust/ is growing...
crustcore
Why are you even watching this dogshit? Turn it off an delete it from your brain
I need more softcore gay bear sex on tv so I can coom. HBO please listen to me.
Questioning the quality of the Halo series is transphobic, racist and antisemitic.
Who's responsible making the Halo TV show woke?
here
clown industry
clown world?
Saw a video from the first episode where "rebels" used a mounted machine gun that did nothing, then a spartan used it and it tore through covenant troops like paper.
Decided not to watch it and instead laugh at morons who do. Feels like I made the right call.
best rename that shit to GAYLO 3
gaylo pee
We ain't doin' GEOMETRY
GAYLO
The crustkino we needed in these dark times...
I thought wyatt was banned after he made crunchyroll morons seethe.
I don't watch gay shit
>OP obviously posting his own tweet
Of all the reasons to crap on the show this is what you go for? Some gay kids get representation and feel nice, literally what is the problem?
>le problem is teh gay heheh
Good one
Yes? gay shit is the aids cherry on top of the shit sundae your moronic troony.
Pretending to be a troony just to get (You)s is still troony behavior. Allah willing Americans will be skinned alive and raped in the streets for your sodomy and pseudo-sodomy.
lol shut up moron
I’m literally not baiting
>some gay kids get representation
The fat gay blind albino black kids are finally getting representation.
too on the nose
>spartans are just allowed to take their armor off and go wherever the hell they want despite the fact they were on almost constant deployments throughout the war
i hope the writers get kidnapped by the taliban
I was pirating it and can't even bring myself to watch an entire episode.
Are they trying to replicate that episode from TLOU? I haven't watched either btw
There's a rumor going around it was supposed to be a TV show based on Mass Effect and that makes much more sense than whatever the frick they've created.
>rumor going around
sauce?? mass effect has been dead for years bruh
>dead
Legendary Edition literally released 2 years ago.
Anyways: Google it. I'm not spoon-feeding you.
There's not enough homosexuals making out or albino nigs mogging the camera
Indifference, because i never played halo and i don't have Paramount+
>Hairy bearded men kissing and fugging
Why is this so needed now?
WTF please delete this tweet, sweaty. Y'all are LITERALLY genociding trans folk and the entire LGBTJGHWNZ++ community!!!
Its hot and I coom to it
>better get to work fast, there was a lot of cheese in that lasagna
Total genocide by the covenant doesn’t sound so bad.
I actually burst out laughing.