what went so right?
like...obviously, this movie is TERRIBLE, but my god was it entertaining.
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what went so right? like...obviously, this movie is TERRIBLE, but my god was it entertaining.
>the writers of Morbius
>lead actress who is 100% checked out
>a main antagonist whose every line is ADRed terribly
>prequel that is so far up a continuity ass it doesn't even know which and can't figure out why it exists
>Shills trying to sell the movie on "It's so bad its good" now
Not buying it
>incapable of appreciating "He was in the Amazon with my mom when she was researching spiders right before she died"
It's not even in the real movie
but there were so many other dumb lines regardless.
"I mean it's rare for mothers to die...in childbirth, I mean"
at a baby shower.
it was great, when spider woman said "it's webbing time!" my whole theater clapped and cheered
No its very funny
S stands for Spider
The shill replies proved you right
I dont even think its in theaters anymore dude, nobody is getting paid to come here.
But if we ask hard enough they might release it again
The Morbius rerelease bombed hard so I dont think they'll fall for the memes again
They want streaming numbers and validation to keep pumping out crap to retain rights. Like Kraven
Unironically go away then.
Frick off with your shit movie and get off my board. You're a disgrace to Spidey fans
>my board
post age homosexual
or what lol? You'll cry?
Little janny junior...
Anon, the Sony executives told Dakota Johnson to shut the frick up after she was like "yeah the movie sucks" to a universally paned movie. If they actually wanted to capitalize on the so bad its good crowd it would imply they are capable of being self aware.
>CAPTCHA: HAAG
The entire movie feels like an episode of Drake and Josh but without the laugh track
>think this is just another joke
>look it up
>Madame Web and Morbius were ACTUALLY written by the same two guys
We need to give them their own cringekino cinematic universe.
Everything they've written so far.
>power rangers
>gods of egypt
>morbius
>madame web
Jesus christ, all of the garbage.
Genuinely impressive how these dudes are able to write critically-panned giant flops over and over again and still get hired to make more. What's their secret? Do they have dirt on someone?
hollywood is generally lazy when it comes to finding new talent that isn't a nepo hire
>Dracula Untold, first attempt at monsters Dark Universe for Universal, basically a superhero movie, failed
>Last Witch Hunter, forgettable and failed
>Gods of Egypt fricking bland and ugly piece of garbage
>Power Rangers, servicable but very meh
>Morbius/Madame Web Sony slop
That is Hollywood for you. People can do nothing but slop and keep getting hired. You don't even need dirt on people.
>Power Rangers, servicable but very meh
Nowhere in the multiverse is Power Rangers "serviceable".
The Last Witch Hunter is easily the best one here and its a 6/10 at best.
I liked 5 (five) of these movies.
>literally less entertaining than the worst of Neil Breen's filmography
nah it's boring shit
>the worst of neil breen's filmography
...which would that be?
Probably I Am Here.... Now?
I dunno man it's been a while since I watched most of them and the really boring ones are so hard to pay attention to that it's difficult to remember which is which. Not all of his shit is as batshit hilariously bad as Double Down or Fateful Findings.
I've heard the new cade movie might be his worst. I haven't had a chance to sit down with any of them yet, but I've heard nothing but good about how bad his films are.
Yeah I've heard Cade is pretty bad in a not good way but I haven't gotten around to watching it. I am here.... Now is probably legitimately the most boring film I've ever sat down to watch, going into something expecting dogshit kino and getting just... nothing instead might be the most disappointing feeling there is.
that was my experience with Birdemic. CHRIST is that movie dull.
Double Down is easily his best. I've watched it three times and its still funny.
I Am Here…. Now is his most underrated film though, how could you not love cyber space alien Jesus? Even if it’s the exact same movie as Pass Thru, you still have to appreciate it. Cade the tortured crossing on the other hand was just straight bad and there was almost nothing fun about it.
I thought it was better than The Marvels.
I diddn't watch it. Alright. We have shill and hater accusations. I want someone who loves it to try showing me a MAXIMUM of 3 short clips.
Nobody loves it. Not even the people who were in it are pretending it was actually good.
I love it.
Shut the frick up chatgpt
They should've tried to appeal to the mommy fetishists even harder
Why is this smug mid roastie cast as the lead in so many Hollywood schlock films? Also, casting Sweeney I'm the spider-man movies and not letting her play Black Cat with her breasts out was a crime against humanity
it had entertaining moments, but for the most part I thought it was pretty boring. see it with some friends and the discussion about everything wrong with it will be far more entertaining
I found it flat and boring? Morbius at least had shit like the dance scene. This was so fricking dry and lacked the camp or accidental comedy.
The diner scene was pretty hilarious. Villain just casually walks in with a full spidersuit and in the next shot he's significantly shorter looking than any of the girls.
I'm going to keep going because I want to see how much you'll spaz out. I hope you think about le Madame Web shills all night long.
The diner scene was mostly stupid and cringe. The only scene that I got a visceral laugh from was the baby shower "my mother died in child birth lol, I mean its rare for mothers to die"
>attempts at setting the period 00s including a big beyonce poster, Britney's toxic or guy playing a PSP
>pepsi product placement including the sign killing the bad guy
>two flash forward scenes of them in costume
>no motivation explained for any of the characters
>cringey spider-man references aka "When you take on the responsibility, great power will come" and about Ben becoming an uncle "all the fun none of the responsibility"
>why can't we go to the police scene when there is a super powered guy stalking us including "my parents are rich and don't care" "I was running away" and "I'm illegal"
I wanted this to be a so-bad-its-good film but it was too blandly done
Early 2000 teen midriff kino.
Every Sony live action faux-MCU movie is worse than the last one and yet somehow their animated output is top tier. If I were a Hollywood money man I'd demand they never make another non-animated superhero movie again and pump all their cash into cartoons.
>Emoji Movie 12: Into the Emoji-Verse
>Hotel Transylvania 15: Genndy Shoves Adam Sandler Up His Ass
How entertaining though. Like The Room kind of entertaining?
yes
The new Ghostbusters movie with the big nose kid from Stranger Things and Ant Man guy is worse, way worse.
>Cinemaphile now pretends this garbage was enjoyable in any capacity
Just have a nice day, you contrarian dipshits.
Are we seeing the same thread? Also
>Cinemaphile is one guy