Some parallel jokes he did: >My uncle is a alcoholic. He has the terrible disease of alcoholism. I told him, yes, you have a disease, but I think you got the best one. With bone cancer, you just slowly shrivel away and die. With alcoholism, you just get happy and frick other people who have the same disease as you.
A recent study suggests that despite its high sugar content, syrup is actually beneficial to your health.
More great work from the University of Aunt Jemima
A recent study shows that men with beards are more attractive than men without beards. More great work from the University of Bob Seger.
Marlon Brando apologizing to the israelites for saying the israelites run Hollywood and being allowed to work in hollywood again now that he's apologized for claiming that israelites run hollywood.
last week marlon brando made the shocking statement that hollywood was "run by israelites" in response outraged israeli organizations made it snow in new york in april
it’s also a way for leftoids to not have contemplate that he only got off because blacks are insanely tribalistic and harbor barely concealed hatred for whites on average. They’d go insane if they had to acknowledge this
It was supposed to be auctioned off to pay for the civil suit he lost to the Goldman family, but his agent took it away in time then sold it.
https://www.sportscasting.com/the-bizarre-tales-of-o-j-simpsons-heisman-trophy-awards-and-where-they-are-today/
Am I crazy or was there an interview where someone asked if the Old Jack part of his book was true, and he said something along the lines of "I just wrote it how I remembered it". I swear I've seen every Norm interview out there and I remember this, but I haven't been able to find out where I remember hearing it.
I really like "Great Gatsby: 3D" but I feel that his funniest bit is probably his run on Millionaire or the Youtube Comedy awards. "Like pulling Bugs Bunny out of a hat" is an extremely witty joke especially if it was genuinely off the cuff.
Norm giving Adam Eget a spotlight and a chance was great. Sure he's got his own thing going but Norm really had a good friend with Eget and a good sidekick
I just finished reading Norm's book the other night. It really tickled me that even within this fictional story Norm is still having Adam Eget as his sidekick, with exactly the same dynamic they have on the show, and still calls him the full name Adam Eget every single time he refers to him.
Also the book is absolutely hysterically funny and I recommend it heartily to anyone.
coward was so afraid of getting cancelled so all he does is take potshots, and as soon as there's the slightest hint of controversy he kowtows and apologizes. I have more respect for rob schneider for voicing his opinions
his apologies consisted of: >accusing Clinton of being a murderer >laughing while he apologizes >making such a facetious gesture regarding Roseanne that he could barely keep a straight face.
That motherfricker got to sit on a couch and be le witty for 20 years and fixed his and his grandchildren's lives, the frick does he think of himself? Didnt he leave Conan to be a tv star, fail, then go back to sit on the couch and now completely disappear. Did he ever do something funny, other than the cheap quip here and there? Also, the swedish-german joke is about him getting raped, not gay. Fat fricking c**t
His bit where he talked about how when he went to buy a dog they kept showing him these huge ones like rottweilers and pit bulls, so he said "I want a dog that if he goes berserk and tries to kill me I can beat him in a fight." I'm a big guy and the same thing happened when I got my dog.
he left when OJ was found innocent by a jury of his papers. Ashamed and faced with his rampant internalized racism, could not continue to make OJ jokes, despite what Don Ohlmeyer demanded of him
ESL moron here
Can anyone explain me what Norm is saying in this Conan clip after "I dont think I can survive it", around 2:25?
https://yewtu.be/watch?v=C800ec_yukw
about the pulse? he's basically just saying she's making him excited/horny
'if the doctor had to take my pulse he'd have to subract a lot, because it wouldn't be an accurate reading. because right now i wanna frick this black b***h'
>I went to Broke Back Mountain, I thought it was a Western. I swear to god they told me it was a Western. Now I'm sitting in the back watching and I'm thinking, where's the guy with the white hat and the guy with the black hat and I wanna see them shooting each other out the front of the saloon. The last thing I want to see is a close up of a beautiful hot wiener slipping into an butthole. Now they didn't show that in the movie, but why not? If they're going to make a movie, make it right.
Gambling addiction is an illness, a terrible terrible disease.
But it’s the only disease where you can win one million dollars
Alcoholism is the best disease; it's the only one where you get to drink a load of booze
I wish you were funny.
if you drank a lot of booze you'd find it funny
Some parallel jokes he did:
>My uncle is a alcoholic. He has the terrible disease of alcoholism. I told him, yes, you have a disease, but I think you got the best one. With bone cancer, you just slowly shrivel away and die. With alcoholism, you just get happy and frick other people who have the same disease as you.
A recent study shows that men with beards are more attractive than men without beards. More great work from the University of Bob Seger.
Marlon Brando apologizing to the israelites for saying the israelites run Hollywood and being allowed to work in hollywood again now that he's apologized for claiming that israelites run hollywood.
last week marlon brando made the shocking statement that hollywood was "run by israelites" in response outraged israeli organizations made it snow in new york in april
If it's got Carrot Top in it, you know what a good name for it would be?
"Box Office Poison"
Is board spelled b-o-r-e-d
>Nah, I'm just kidding, we don't hire women.
A recent study suggests that despite its high sugar content, syrup is actually beneficial to your health.
More great work from the University of Aunt Jemima
I liked him showing up to that YouTube event in sweatpants and roasting the shit out of everything
>ALL THE STARS ARE HERE
He knew so few people there he was actually excited to see a neobaby like Andy Samberg.
Andy Samberg is funny, and actually followed Norm's Hitler jokes to ruin the interview. The Lonely Island might be overrated but they were funny
>sounds like a bunch of commie gobbledyasiatic
I found your son.
Guilty or not, police procedural frickups like that need to be punished.
>police procedural frickups need to be punished but not double murder
average Black person apologist right here
Yup. "Better to let a guilty man go free" is literally the entire founding principle of the American justice system.
it’s also a way for leftoids to not have contemplate that he only got off because blacks are insanely tribalistic and harbor barely concealed hatred for whites on average. They’d go insane if they had to acknowledge this
ya, the American justice system that the founders explicitly believed only northwest European descendants were capable of fully participating in
No, it is not.
Aren't you supposed to be dead Johnnie?
Norm dropping an OJ bomb during the ESPYs live is probably the only good thing to ever come out of that joke of an awards show.
He was not invited to host again lol
Espy's have repeatedly showed athletes are some of the thinnest skinned crybabies on the planet
Is that O.J that it cuts to after he tells the joke? I can't tell but judging by the lines of assblasted guys to his left I'm guessing it is, right?
ok it isn't just wanted to know
that's michelle obama, OJ wasn't there
>Any stupid setup for a joke
>Ending it with "9/11"
you do agree 9/11 was a national tragedy?
9/11
His best joke wasn't even told by him
what a terrible way to approach somebody. it reminds me of that tragedy
dying
when i heard he dropped dead it was the only time i ever laughed at that clown
Edgy
>dying
>when i heard he dropped dead it was the only time i ever laughed at that clown
This
>posting obvious b8 to (you) farm to keep the thread bumped
im onto you. based
I didn't even know he was sick
meta. i hate meta
Good will Smith by artie lange
>He was in Northern Canada at the time.
chicken hatchery
>Nine Eleven
The hypocrisy bit. Its not even a good joke but i like people just acting like smug c**ts at morons and norm nailed it.
Norm's delivery was 90% of his humor
Just god tier
Barbara Walters recently announced her retirement from The View after more than 15 years on the program. What’s next for Babs? Death.
"I can get us a bottle"
>The Heisman Award is something that they can never take away from you
>Unless you kill your wife and a waiter
Did they really take it away even though he was found not guilty?
It was supposed to be auctioned off to pay for the civil suit he lost to the Goldman family, but his agent took it away in time then sold it.
https://www.sportscasting.com/the-bizarre-tales-of-o-j-simpsons-heisman-trophy-awards-and-where-they-are-today/
>and get this, this gay guy invites me over to have chicken
>I was fired from Saturday night live for not being funny
Pitting an the most stubborn and ornery pig man in the world and a subreddit for sociopathic fans of a dead radio show against each other
First time I heard it, the "Frank Stallone" non sequitur sent me into orbit
Personal favorite:
Who Jackie?
Norm’s greatest appearances was on Conan’s last day on the job.
?si=j3QSHOu6i5PTbM93
My all time favorite norm late night appearance was him on Leno. Him at his best imo
?si=iTkmH0lb0I1mPhsm
>that's something they can never take away from you
a genius
hiring that holocaust denier Adam Egret
for me it's johnny two feathers
this was brilliant
its like an onion
it has layers
ALL THE STARS ARE HERE
his eyes are hypnotic
odd-looking duck
Or so the Germans would have us believe
>I'd be afraid to fall under the spell of his fricking beautiful eyes
HOLD THE FORT
>all the stars are here
>like Harley MorenSTEEN and Adam SandBERG
What did he mean by this
>"Eh?"
no its AH??
>you're my hero
cast eyerin grilling grates
The entire man grate saga is his best bit.
Steak has never tasted so good.
He invented the note to self meme. That's his best work
>tfw old jack
Am I crazy or was there an interview where someone asked if the Old Jack part of his book was true, and he said something along the lines of "I just wrote it how I remembered it". I swear I've seen every Norm interview out there and I remember this, but I haven't been able to find out where I remember hearing it.
Nevermind, I found it thanks to reddit.
https://www.dinnerpartydownload.org/norm-macdonald-interview/
I really like "Great Gatsby: 3D" but I feel that his funniest bit is probably his run on Millionaire or the Youtube Comedy awards. "Like pulling Bugs Bunny out of a hat" is an extremely witty joke especially if it was genuinely off the cuff.
Norm giving Adam Eget a spotlight and a chance was great. Sure he's got his own thing going but Norm really had a good friend with Eget and a good sidekick
I just finished reading Norm's book the other night. It really tickled me that even within this fictional story Norm is still having Adam Eget as his sidekick, with exactly the same dynamic they have on the show, and still calls him the full name Adam Eget every single time he refers to him.
Also the book is absolutely hysterically funny and I recommend it heartily to anyone.
the audio version is Norm reading it and it's amazing
>Maybe the worst gimmick a comic ever had
kek, this is a good one. And you know it's off-the-cuff because it's only because of Fred Stoller's poor choice of words.
His Answering Machine Bit always killed.
The speed that he came up with this one is amazing.
coward was so afraid of getting cancelled so all he does is take potshots, and as soon as there's the slightest hint of controversy he kowtows and apologizes. I have more respect for rob schneider for voicing his opinions
his apologies consisted of:
>accusing Clinton of being a murderer
>laughing while he apologizes
>making such a facetious gesture regarding Roseanne that he could barely keep a straight face.
>hooker?
>i hardly knew her!
>Swedish-Germans & deep closeting
>Do better
What a gay.
>really lame
>slightly hate perpetuating
>thuddingly dumb
>belligerently dumb
>work harder
>do better
I really liked Andy Richter's short-lived sitcom, but his Twitter is painful. Thuddingly painful, even.
sounds like he's a gay
>Now there's nothing wrong with being gay. Unless you're not gay, then it's the worst thing.
Maybe his little tantrum is exactly why
That motherfricker got to sit on a couch and be le witty for 20 years and fixed his and his grandchildren's lives, the frick does he think of himself? Didnt he leave Conan to be a tv star, fail, then go back to sit on the couch and now completely disappear. Did he ever do something funny, other than the cheap quip here and there? Also, the swedish-german joke is about him getting raped, not gay. Fat fricking c**t
>the swedish-german joke is about him getting raped, not gay
man rape is pretty gay
well certainly, but the swedish-german is VICIOUSLY pro gay, so what's the big deal he's making it to be?
For me, it's his ventriloquist act when he called in to Dennis Miller's radio show.
I’ve listened to that “hours and hours of norm on Dennis miller” so many times. They’re so good together
Those calls were the funniest things I’ve ever heard
>another joke from the vault
>all this and more in this week’s issue of DUH
For me, its
>A joke? From my cardiologist!
and
>The whole Mount Ararat bit
>he’s not a comedian!
>>The whole Mount Ararat bit
I forgot about that bit. Fricking brilliant.
His bit where he talked about how when he went to buy a dog they kept showing him these huge ones like rottweilers and pit bulls, so he said "I want a dog that if he goes berserk and tries to kill me I can beat him in a fight." I'm a big guy and the same thing happened when I got my dog.
did you know you're a cis male?
>Death is a funny thing. Not funny haha, like a Woody Allen movie, but funny strange, like a Woody Allen marriage.
>He's an alcholic so he doesn't drink. I'm not so I do drink. Life is funny like that
?si=E4SdqjkU0hYhb31q
andy richter: male prostitute
>I'm just an old chunk of coal
turns out norm wasn't actually fired from SNL. He just left after his writer for weekend update got fired for writing too many OJ jokes. RDJ's uncle.
he left when OJ was found innocent by a jury of his papers. Ashamed and faced with his rampant internalized racism, could not continue to make OJ jokes, despite what Don Ohlmeyer demanded of him
>Whanganui a tara
You know a nation has lost confidence in itself when it promotes inferior culture as an identity
woops, wrong thread
>let's read some jokes
someone should kill norm macdonald
this is a call to violence, against famous standup comedian Norm Macdonald, star of the film "Dirty's Work"
almost everything on Conan
>And if I know Conan OBrien, miserable failure is not an option
hot take: kassem g played off norm as best as he could, certainly better than the b***h
He did ok for an acid-tongued arab
i liked it when he got the guests to explain things for the folks at home. he was always so thoughtful.
just kidding we don't hire women
ESL moron here
Can anyone explain me what Norm is saying in this Conan clip after "I dont think I can survive it", around 2:25?
https://yewtu.be/watch?v=C800ec_yukw
about the pulse? he's basically just saying she's making him excited/horny
'if the doctor had to take my pulse he'd have to subract a lot, because it wouldn't be an accurate reading. because right now i wanna frick this black b***h'
i wish he wrote a couple more books. i've listened to his audiobook 3 times.
>OP feverishly takes notes so he can remember and recite norms best bits
>I went to Broke Back Mountain, I thought it was a Western. I swear to god they told me it was a Western. Now I'm sitting in the back watching and I'm thinking, where's the guy with the white hat and the guy with the black hat and I wanna see them shooting each other out the front of the saloon. The last thing I want to see is a close up of a beautiful hot wiener slipping into an butthole. Now they didn't show that in the movie, but why not? If they're going to make a movie, make it right.
Looking for his brother on 9/11
>he was in northern Canada