Who the frick reads poetry while taking a shit?
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Who the frick reads poetry while taking a shit?
Who the frick reads poetry while taking a shit?
Nothing Ever Happens Shirt $21.68 |
Ape Out Shirt $21.68 |
Nothing Ever Happens Shirt $21.68 |
hey zoomer, back when we didn't have smartphones we grabbed whatever was around and read it on the toilet. anyway I fricked your mom Black person
But why. When it's time for me to shit, it's time to shit. I'm 4 cm dilated and have contractions ever 5 minutes. When my cheeks hit that seat, it's less than 3 minutes till I'm whipping and flushing the goods down. Have you considered eating more fiber.
>3 minutes
Perfect time to read 1-3 poems, homosexual.
>ass massively dilated before going to toilet
>taking a long time to shit
Consider eating enough fat to not be constipated, and maybe eating less fiber.
They ate like shit so it took them a long time to shit.
If you eat properly you won't even have time to open up a book or newspaper.
Anyone who reads on the toilet deserves to be put down for the benefit of humanity.
What we need is less of you, not them.
i'm 35 and never read anything on the toilet. why are you on the shitter for such a long time that you NEED some form of entertainment?
I'm a speed shitter too
i'm convinced they like slowly moving their turd around because this is closest they can ge to getting fricked in the ass without actual doing it. just another example of latent homosexuality.
Why are you getting so butthurt over people taking a long shit? I think you're taking things a little personal.
>n n no u!
ok
Seek help
Oh, I'm sorry anon, I forgot we all shit the same. I forgot all of our colons are exactly the same as well as diet. I forgot that when I'm taking a shit for 20 minutes, it should only be 2 minutes like you. Also, it's definitely only that I'm not getting enough fiber, right? Yup, that's completely it.
Why do morons like you even open their mouths? Every human body is different. It doesn't mean anything is wrong, either. I'm not constipated, and I've had both extremes of fiber. It simply takes longer for everything to come out.
i bet you are fat and a gay see
If anything shows homosexualry in taking a shit, I think it'd be your loose butthole that drops turds in seconds. Wear diapers, do you?
Why are you going to the toilet if you're not ready to shit?
wow epic! can i post this on /r/clevercomebacks? i bet your fellow redditians will upvote it to the SKY!
This should be considered normal. What the frick is wrong with these people that need to be in there for 30 minutes?
Don't act like milennials invented reading on the toilet, they are literally the first generation to stop doing it
>needing to read something on the toilet
you and zoomers are literally the same
I'm 31 and I have never in my life spent more than a few seconds taking a shit.
What the frick is wrong with people diet that they have enough time to read anything while shitting?
Knuckleheads like Hank does.
WTF do you do, zoomer? Browse Tik-Tok?
No Cinemaphile through the phone app.
Here I sit,
Broken hearted.
I tried to shit,
But only farted.
-Walt Whitman
>Later when I had the chance
>I went to fart and shit my pants
-j. Pinkman (heroin era)
>Walt Whitman
More like Walt SHITman.
>Rippen thru
>I did a poo
>Toilet paper brown in loo
>the same has happened to my fingers too
Bravo, anons, you gaveth me a good chuckle....5 poos out of loo
The night was dark, the sky was blue
along the road, the shitwagon flew
a bump was hit, a cry was heard
OP got hit, by a flying turd
It's a metaphor for poetry being literal shit. You need a very high iq to understand Vince Gilligan's vision.
I use my phone to play the hitler game on wikipedia
I solve sudokus. It's exhilarating.
Sometimes I do
A gentleman
Why did Walt, the supposed master manipulator, essentially confess to Hank he was Heisenberg when he could easily gaslight him into thinking he's crazy. He knew Hank had a tracker on his car, so he could have spent the next month or so driving around his carwashes living a normal life. Maybe even hitting casinos to give credence to his poker winnings theory. Shit he could have actually go to a few casinos play until he won a few huge hands and let it slip back home. All Hank had was Gale's initials, a loose connection between Gale and Gus and Walt acting weird a few times in addition to money stuff. He'd make Hank doubt himself if he started coming home with serious casino cash every day for a month straight with his only lead being a dying cancer patient doing something weird and two letters on a book they once discussed in connection to some dead chemist.
this shit was so forced and unrealistic. Imagine a Ape sits one day on a toilet and there lays around some math equation nobody could solve. But lo and behold the neurons of the ape connect in lightspeed and he solves it, screaming and throwing shit. Hank was a midwit, I`m surprised he could even read
>ITT anons who only eat tendies with no variations to their diet flabbergasted by the fact that sometimes it can take longer than a minute to take a shit
lmao, a well-balanced, high fibre diet means you have easy shits. you just outed yourself as a moron
>verification not required
Why are you going to the toilet before tou need to shit? Why is your diet so fricked up in the first place?
Samegay
I read Ovid while trying to shit out my morphine shit.
>books in the toilet are full of fecal bacteria
This. If I had a book in the shitter, I could never put it back on the shelf. It's contaminated.
When I sit on the toilet I SHIT
For you speed shitters out there; don't you ever just hang out on the toilet after your shit cause it's a comfy place to be? I have speed shits quite regularly, but I often just stay and enjoy the peaceful, carefree, detached atmosphere of the bathroom, and reading a good book is just the icing on the cake.
this, i can shit and be done in a minute or so, but i usually stay for a few minutes just thinking taking a moment of peace
Absolutely. I do it until I can't feel my legs and try not to fall when I walk.
No, because I usually feel compelled to wipe my ass after a shit, and once I've done that, I don't want to stay sitting on the shitter with my ass exposed for no reason. I get what you mean though, but I take long showers for my moment of peace, and yes, I read when I take showers.
why is he shitting in the master bathroom
>shit is rock hard and rips your butthole hair apart
>small poops stuck around your ass
Who the frick takes a shit while visiting someone else's house, I just go home
subhumans, its the same for shitting in public, reprehensible, the only time you have an excuse for shitting away from home is, being on holiday, staying at some place/family's for a few days or having 12+ hour shifts, anything else and you are a subhuman
I only disagree with you when it comes to shitting at work. Not only do you get to frick off from doing your job, you become less paranoid and anxious about the potential need to take a shit when you're at work. For a long time I didn't take dumps at work even when I needed to and it was a fricking unnecessary torture.
I usually browse Cinemaphile. No Cap.
I play chess while on the toilet
I read all of lord of the rings while sitting on the toilet over a few months
at some points i literally looked forward to toilet time so I could keep reading it
ITT: hemorrhoids
HAAAAAAAAAANK
THATS THE MASTER BATHROOM
WE HAVE ANOTHER BATHROOM IN THE HALLWAY