Why cant tv shows and films get the armor and weapons of medieval men at arms and knights right?
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 Ape Out Shirt $21.68 |
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Why cant tv shows and films get the armor and weapons of medieval men at arms and knights right?
Why cant tv shows and films get the armor and weapons of medieval men at arms and knights right?
|
Ape Out Shirt $21.68 |
|
Because they are not autists and are not catering to autists.
what offended you this week anon?
why not just put them in bikinis and use rubber chickens for weapons then
Ok. No fat chicks and nobody from the cast of dunc.
>everything has to be either one-hundred percent authentic down to every detail
>or it should be a complete farce.
>what do you mean black-and-white thinking is a symptom of autism
The real answer is that consumers don’t give a shit. If rubber chicken battles were what people wanted, producers would cater to that. If autistically nitpicked and excruciating historical detail was what consumers wanted, producers would cater to it. Instead, people want enough realism to suspend their disbelief and create verisimilitude but don’t care or notice beyond that.
Every good movie, game, book, or product in general you've ever liked was made by and for autists. Only autists care enough to make things good. When autists aren't the ones making stuff primarily for other autists, the result is Marvel Studios - initial financial success due to novelty, followed by running that particular formula into the ground with sequels, rehashes, and ripoffs until the novelty wears off and the normieBlack folk like you bleat for something "different". Not being autists, you don't actually know *what* it is you want, just "something new", and eventually an autist will labour to make their batshit obsession into a reality and you'll latch on to it, but because you're a dumb subnormal poofter you'll scoff at the 'tism that birthed it and sneeringly cheer as your fellow normienigs rip it away and do the same thing over again.
autists are literally mentally moronic, they have an actual mental disability and shit themselves and screech, being slightly odd isn't autism, genuine autistic people are special needs and i'm very sorry you suffer from it but 99% of the world doesn't and therefore most media isn't catered for you no matter how hard you cry on Cinemaphile about it, you're not smart or special, you're a literal moron
always remember that
🙁
Because you're gay.
Because nobody gives a shit.
I don't know why, it could be kino
>And I was obliged to fight five times in this way. And five times, for my honor, I had to fight in unfamiliar places without relatives and without friends to support me, not trusting anyone but God, my art, myself, and my sword.
Nothing this kino could be said in a film in this day and age.
They just need more colors.
If you were a medieval lord then almost nobody knows your face but lots of people know your colors, so you would fly dem colors proudly.
They choose not to.
>armor and weapons of medieval men at arms and knights right?
This is like hundreds of different styles from over a few hundred year period that continuously changed
And never once get properly depicted
they wear scrap metal glued to riding gear and useless bash at iron plate with swords
this would trigger audiences
It terrifies the clergy
papist scum
oh mine god, i accidentally hath sent thou a picture of mine wiener and balls...prithee delete it!! 'Lest...thou desire to look? haha I jest, delete it...should thee crave... haha nay, banish it...'lest?
>can my maidens believe there are knyghts who live thus
Besides a perch for my falcon, what more does one need?
for a start a big sign declaring Liveth, Loveth, Laugheth
cute clits
I would love an accurate depiction a la "In the name of the rose" but with knights, it's a shame we get Dunc with gay flips and shit.
Think medieval 2 total war with ballistas and trebuchets.
t. amateur historian
Dune is science fiction not historical
I dont think it is something you could do on a huge scale because of the costs involved
It would to be something modest with only a few hundred people - or even scaled right down to 'lone knight comes to town' like Yojimbo/Fistful of Dollars
costumes are another thing they're more than willing to cut corners on in order to give more money to the 'exective producers' and other assorted uhhhh people of a certain background.
they often dont make them but rent from prop stores to save money
so with a keen eye you can see the same armor across several productions and decades
How the frick were the lord of the rings movies so much better in this department then anything since?
they did make their own
but they weren't really historical, just based on Alan Lees work
>wears a smaller helmet under the visor
What now gay
Most peasants were not trained
among the English quarterstaff and longbow training was common
This low budget English comedy had some master armor scholars and reenactors show up with their stuff and make an authentic recreation of the armor Richard III would have worn at Bosworth.
>had some master armor scholars and reenactors show up with their stuff
No, Tobias Capwell was the consultant and I think wore his armor for the final scene but the rest was made for the film
Nah, they just made Richard's armor.
this thread again lol
Any minute now some autist will post that image from Henry V in blown out 1950s technicolor and insist that’s an accurate portrayal of the late Middle Ages.
When was the last time you saw accurate late roman attire in movies?
Movies with scenes showing Catholic priests wearing liturgical vestments while performing mass.
never seen these hats
Swiss Guard at the Vatican.
>its not the size that counts, i swear!
Left
>crisp, clean, aesthetic
Right
>gaudy semitised garbage
There is a reason everyone goes for the left even if inaccurate for the time period, it's what is culturally ingrained as "Roman", while the right just looks like any very early Eastern Medieval garb
because there is no demand for it
there is a demand for rubblish?
Meanwhile Hollywood and Ridley Scott.
>half face
>everything is dark and dreary and blue
The half helmet is one of the dumbest design decisions I've ever seen in a "historical" movie.
>we need to see the stars on screen!!
frick you Ridley you hack
because it isn't a historical documentary
see
because what u posted was homosexual late medieval armor
only autists like that shit
>because what u posted was homosexual late medieval armor
>only autists like that shi-ACK
I'm writing something now that does armored combat correctly.
I'm an armored combat buhurt fighter irl.
Even medieval art did this same trope makign armor behave like foam.
>OH N-