Why did it filter so many?

Why did it filter so many?

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  1. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >movie references Milton's "Paradise Lost" and Shakespeare's "The Tempest"
    >wonder why jabbering millennials who wanted panicky Spayce Moreens shooting wildly into Ayy Lmao zerg rushes got lost
    I'm just sorry Scott got bullied into using the tired-ass xenomorph again. The non-studio interference version had some sick concept art.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Anyone can name drop famous literature, anon. How about this, you explain to me who or what Prometheus is in the context of the first prequel?

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        yes, he is. also was in it in the 2nd movie too

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Convincing argument. I assume you're talking about David? Which is completely wrong even by Ridley's moronic standards. You have no idea what you're talking about, which explains why you think this was a decent movie. In case you don't have Down's Syndrome, I will rephrase my question: Where I can find "Mr. Prometheus" in the credits?

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Prometheus was the dude at the beginning who cracked open that Monster, took a swig and died.

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              Uh huh, interesting. Because in classic literature... Prometheus drank black goo nano-machines which created all humans on earth?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                I’m not the anon you were arguing with you don’t have to be so snide.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Why are you trying to explain something you don't understand? Prometheus gave humans the capacity to use technology. He did this because he loved humans and was punished for eternity because of it. In what way does that correlate to guy drinking black goo to create DNA? They even mention Jesus in the fricking movie, why not use that in the title?

                just say im am smarter man .
                YOU ARE NO DAVID.

                You can't even answer the question. Also, gay robots are gay.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            just say im am smarter man .
            YOU ARE NO DAVID.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        the Xeno was the "Fire" that Prometheus stole from the gods (engenerris)

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          that's the dumbest thing I've ever heard about this movie.

          Prometheus was the dude at the beginning who cracked open that Monster, took a swig and died.

          Prometheus obviously refers to the Engineer who sabotaged the outpost on LV-223 so the humanity would survive.

          >It's perfectly clear and understandable that all three of these are true at the same time. MOVIE FOR INTELLECTUALS.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >nothing can be left ambiguous, NOTHING!
            Lol, you should've just closed the tab gay.

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              The opposite is true, Ridley's major frick up was in trying to explain the monster. Film-making 101, and he stepped directly into it. It was people like YOU who wanted to know where the aliens came from, how they got there, where's Ripley, where's Riplety's daughter? Where's Ripley's firend's aunt? And so on. It was your desire to suck every last ounce of mystery away from one of the more engimatic creatures to be on film. You're allowed to like Promie and Covie, you just have absolute shit taste in movies.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Why are you seething at Ridley when Cameron explained the monster decades before the prequels?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Because this is Covie thread about Covie and and the guy who directed it? Feel free to start a thread about Aliens, I have some critiques I'll lay on that too.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Why are you complaining about Ripley and her relatives then? None of the questions you mentioned were answered by Covenant.

                Cameron didn't explain anything though? He expanded on their lifecycle after being alive for more than a few days. Not explaining who the space jockey was, nor where it came from, nor where the xenos were from. Ridley is the one who decided to make a completely separate movie with no relation whatsoever to Alien then shoehorn it in and halfass say "sure whatever it connects here and here" not giving a frick as long as it gets idiots to buy a movie ticket.

                And why is Cameron expanding on something not explaining but Ridley expanding on something is?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                I'm complaining about people like you, duh.

                Cameron did ruin the alien's mystique by turning them into mere bugs. You're confusing me with whomever else you're arguing with.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >You're confusing me with whomever else you're arguing with.
                How so?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Cameron didn't explain anything though? He expanded on their lifecycle after being alive for more than a few days. Not explaining who the space jockey was, nor where it came from, nor where the xenos were from. Ridley is the one who decided to make a completely separate movie with no relation whatsoever to Alien then shoehorn it in and halfass say "sure whatever it connects here and here" not giving a frick as long as it gets idiots to buy a movie ticket.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                you do realize that ridley scott didn't write the script right

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Prometheus obviously refers to the Engineer who sabotaged the outpost on LV-223 so the humanity would survive.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Prometheus is the engineers who stole the fire of life (black goo) from the gods (saucer ship) to create life as they saw fit. At the end, the engineer is disemboweled by his own creation the xenomorph, the head is pointy instead of phallic which makes it look like a bird's beak as it comes out of him.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Prometheus IS the context, the movie is not a retelling. It's explicitly referenced by the characters themselves. Weyland named his ship after Prometheus because he believed that the engineers were humanity's benefactors who'd be willing to share more secrets with him. This is in contrast to Shaw who treats the engineers more like the christian god, she wants answers to questions like why she's infertile and why her dad had to die to ebola, why wasn't man made perfect so those kinds of things don't have to happen.

        Anyway, long story short the engineers are more like Zeus in that they think they have dominion over whatever they've created (in ironic parallel to the relationship between Weyland and David), and just as Zeus sent Pandora to punish humanity for their transgression the engineers have their own jar full of evil. Pandora's "box" is a more recent translation, but it is the more popular one which is why so many people missed it in addition to simply not knowing that Pandora is from the Prometheus myth. The reason the goo killed all the engineers on the outpost before they could set sail is because it is not something they made or truly have dominion over, the goo is the gnostic demiurge. That's where it circles back to Shaw's christianity.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Respectable take, but it still doesn't make this shit movie non-shit in its execution and infuriatingly stupid characters and their actions. If I have to ignore so many faults that ruin my immersion and just to appreciate this (post factum and unofficial) interpretation, then it is not a good movie.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >I'm just sorry Scott got bullied into using the tired-ass xenomorph again
      This meme again. It was literally the other way around.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      as soon as you brought up a generation I stopped reading. gentard

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      how is Covenant like the Tempest?

  2. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Because it tried to appeal to so many.

  3. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    because it sucked azz

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Sœylennialoomer detected.

  4. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Alien fans are manchildren who only care about seeing le chestburst and xenomorph while the films actually tries to do something interesting w the lore

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      idk if this is bait but different == interesting and they didn’t do anything differently the final hour of this movie is Danny McBride and that ugly boyhair lady battling James Cameron xenos with cranes and machinery and shit, dumb reddit idiot

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Proving my point LMAO

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          How? That completely refuted your “point” moron. I already knew you were moronic when I read your post but now I know you’re literally some dumb delusional troony that thinks up=down and 2+2=5

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >The only interesting part was when they battled the xenomorphs with a massive forklift
            If you're gonna be a moron maybe don't talk like a redditor and reference 1984 while you do it

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              You said they tried something different and I’m saying no they fricking didn’t. They gave xenos an origin which was they were bred by David with the goo, which already contradicts the series since the original ship they found with the xeno eggs was thousands of years old. Other than that wtf was different about it?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                I never said "different" you fricking illiterate, I just said that it was an interesting take on it which adds some depth that was missing from Prometheus
                Like it's not perfect, killing off Shaw was dumb, but you're still lamebrained if all you're focusing on is the final battle

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                You said I was focusing on the final battle. I’m saying nothing was different about this vs another alien movie other than the addition of the black shit being the xeno genesis which ruins the whole thing imo. it seems neither of us are trannies so bring it in even though you’re wrong about these shitty movies—which I enjoy, just as a guilty pleasure because I like to watch aliens kill people

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                The best part of the movie was the mushroom protoxenos and David trying to commune with them, and that was like a 20-minute segment before the all-action finale.

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              Not a single word of his original post implies he thought the xenomorph parts in covenant were good.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >lore
      Uh dude Scott tried to make it all about how Jesus was either an architect or raised by them. There is no lore.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      This.
      >they ruined le heckin' epic space jockey!! now it's a big white dude!!

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Having mutating goo is fine, its the acting, the gays, the whiney libtard philosophizing, ect that are bad. IE everything about Ridely scott. Also if your plot requires characters to be moronic(not wearing fricking helmets for two movies in a row now) then what's the point?

        Yeah why have the masters of biomechanical creatures and makers of space rape monsters be truly alien and biomechanical.

        Also I'd just shoot the jolly grey giant in the face 20 times with 5.56 and suddenly he isn't so special. Once again the story only exists because the characters are morons.

        Honestly it might be interesting if the theme was that post intelligent creations can outlive their creators, like At the Mountains of Madness which it rips off. Or that humans actually are rapacious expansionists and their practical minds cause them to exterminate the engineers the second that they aren't facing homosexual libtards but cold cruel murders who exist only to perpetuate their family lines at the expense of all over life.

        The xenomorph is weak, the libtards are weak, the Engineers are weak, my kind are end of everything.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Something interesting with the lore
      Alien was interesting. Promotheus and Covenant took everything interesting and made it lame.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Alien was lame. James Cameron is the only one that made a good movie

  5. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I still haven't watched this because they never put it on any streaming service that I haven

  6. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Killing Shaw was a mistake.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      That's pretty much a staple of Alien at this point
      >main character and friends fight to survive and escape
      >next movie comes out and lol jk turns out all the friends died 2 seconds later

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Nah, it only happened in one movie, which is the most reviled and severely damaged the franchise for decades after. Utterly moronic that they decided to copy that idiotic decision for another one.

  7. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Kenny Powers being an officer on some multibillion dollar starcruiser might have been the worst casting choice in history.
    >b..b.. but it's called acting!
    Shut the frick up. That guy is as typecasted as this girl

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Danny McBride wasn’t even the worst part of Covenant by a long shot.

  8. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    It was kino when everyone wanted slop.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      The Prometheus movies are the definition of slop. I literally enjoy the David Saga but these two movies are ultra mega slop. AVP1 is unironically way better and less sloppy than these.

  9. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Being a moronic dogshit mess of a film helps

  10. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Baffling how the alien design gets worse and worse in every movie.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Is this thread nothing but bait? The best alien props in the franchise easily are from alien resurrection or the first alien vs predator.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        No. They have flipper hands.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          The first Alien has more flippery hands than the latter ones.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Nope

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              Digitigrade legs are so much better. The alien towering over people is way scarier

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Spiders would be better, just make them into big spiders if you're going to strip away every last ounce of the human and biomechanical elements of the design, just make them big spiders.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Pleb take.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Wrong, Resurrection and AvP barely had any sense of biomechanical design and used more generic monster features

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      It’s because it’s all a copy of a copy of a copy of a copy of Geiger

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Giger was just as much of a hack and one hit wonder as Ridley was. He laid out his ideas for Alien 3 and they rightfully dumped him

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          His Alien 3 ideas were kino, he's far from a hack.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          You're full of shit. His ideas would have resulted in a far better Alien 3, and his fem/puma Alien is infinitely better than anything we got for that film, or since.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      The design for the NuXenos is fricking garbage. It’s a small distinction but they removed the alien’s cheeks, so now it perpetually has this stupid grin like attack on titan instead of a scary-looking grimace. Plus I feel like it’s a trademark of the alien to curl back its lips and reveal its teeth before it busts your forehead open but now the alien looks like a stupid smiling skeleton with a dickhead.

      It’s because it’s all a copy of a copy of a copy of a copy of Geiger

      It's one of David's early xenomorph prototypes, it's supposed to look different.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Okay but why couldn't it have looked different and also good?

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Because David was busy learning to play flute.

          No? There were proto-xenos in the movie, those flesh-colored ones and they looked different/creepy. The final xeno is a bog standard xeno that had a shitty team of artists render it.

          The final xeno isn't seen until Alien.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        No? There were proto-xenos in the movie, those flesh-colored ones and they looked different/creepy. The final xeno is a bog standard xeno that had a shitty team of artists render it.

  11. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    The Alien franchise is just full of missed opportunities to expand on the universe and lore in a meaningful way. Instead we'll always just get remakes of 1 & 2 because that's what the studio thinks people want.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >because that’s what the studio thinks people want

      Unfortunately this is true though. Everyone saw the poster and the ads for Covenant and were hoping it’d be more like the first two movies and less like Prometheus despite it being a sequel to the latter. And everyone balked and walked away when it was exactly Prometheus 2. It doesn’t help when Scott doesn’t seem to have an actual plan for how it all comes together but even if he did it wouldn’t matter anyways because his movies got scrapped.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >we live in a timeline where everything is so bad that I’m disappointed we never got Prometheus 3 and get zoomie alien reboot with broccoli hairs instead

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >when it was exactly Prometheus 2
        It wasn't though. If it had been, it may actually have been good. It should have expanded on Shaw's journey showing the audience amazing wonders of Engineer creation and beautiful worlds they built and perhaps terrifying ones since they may have split into factions with differing ideas of creation. Instead Shaw is killed offscreen with no promised resolution to her journey, and the Engineers only had one extremely shitty city less than an ancient Roman one, and were killed off in seconds with no answers nor impressive scenes. What we ACTUALLY got was The David Show 2 where Ridley's favorite android is a super villain mastermind doing everything perfectly, spouting psued intellectual nonsense to himself, marveling at his own superiority, and winning over everyone some more.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          yea, worst mistake was killing dr shaw and just go with david's plot, that was fricking stupid and made the movie a lot worse.
          i actually liked prometheus, covenant was a big disapointment.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Prometheus is a perfect movie wasted on generation capeshit

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        You're as bad as Ridley demanding the audience just find the engineers impressive because he said so.
        >The Engineers speak SHAKESPEAREAN in their deleted dialogue, trust me it was definitely soooo epic and SMART! They are definitely really intelligent and cool believe me! No no, I don't need to actually show anything to make them interesting. Oh and religious stuff! They say lord and christ and God! Give me money!
        >You: The movie is sooo perfect! No no, I don't need to actually show anything about the movie is perfect for it to be so. Just trust me.

  12. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Wheat

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      The design for the NuXenos is fricking garbage. It’s a small distinction but they removed the alien’s cheeks, so now it perpetually has this stupid grin like attack on titan instead of a scary-looking grimace. Plus I feel like it’s a trademark of the alien to curl back its lips and reveal its teeth before it busts your forehead open but now the alien looks like a stupid smiling skeleton with a dickhead.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        [...]
        [...]
        It's one of David's early xenomorph prototypes, it's supposed to look different.

        No? There were proto-xenos in the movie, those flesh-colored ones and they looked different/creepy. The final xeno is a bog standard xeno that had a shitty team of artists render it.

        It's funny how they've retconned almost all of Ridley's Covenant and Prometheus plot points in the years since it came off. David didn't create the Xenomorphs he followed a cookbook to make his hyper-aggressive variant that ironically hates real Xenos. The Engineers are not the space jockeys anymore. They keep it vague but they've retconned it so they are probably just another advanced species that might have even been built by the Jockeys or even gone to war with them. The Aliens are still aliens and nothing David did mattered in the long run.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >David didn't create the Xenomorphs he followed a cookbook to make his hyper-aggressive variant that ironically hates real Xenos.
          When/how did they retcon this? The Space Jockey not being an Engineer makes sense though, they're not even the same size.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Nothing about Prometheus makes sense, and it's obviously not related to Alien in any way. If anything it's a Lite Reboot of the series and the two movies should not be intended to be perfectly reconciled at all.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            In the tie-in material overseen by Fox for a few years now, it's all canon. In books or games like "Dark Descent" and the official ALIEN tabletop roleplaying game, they've been retconning a lot of the elements from the Scott movies. Even the new film they're making is slowly reverting to an "Alien 1 & 2" canon, where the Aliens remain mysterious entities, and their origins are not fully explored. They've even officially stated that the retro tech seen in the original films is more commonplace than the hyper-advanced technology seen on the Nostromo.

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              I remember reading Romulus will reference the prequels, it'll be interesting to see what's that about.

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              >corporate dictated brand canon
              Who gives a shit. There wouldn't even be a franchise without Ridley Scott, the comics with the elephant men are fricking cringe trash cashing in on the popularity of a much better work someone else created. The Disney reboots will not be remembered unlike Prometheus and yes, even Covenant.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >the comics with the elephant men are fricking cringe trash cashing in on the popularity of a much better work someone else created.
                Not him but why does it need to be one or the other. You could instead be hung and genius like me and imagine Alien as a one-off movie.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          wtf are you fricking talking about? literally none of this happened in any movie

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Fan backlash. People were saying they refuse to take the prequels as canon no matter what Scott apologists had to say. I assumed Disney wanted to squash the whole David/goo angle, so I'm a little surprised to hear it might be coming back in the show.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Do you have any sources for this stuff because it sounds interesting.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      SPBP.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I don't get this meme, there was an Engineer city nearby.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >Imagine being Protomorph in that scene and having to be all like "damn, Danny McBride, you frickin' fierce, all delicious with your flabby body and horrific androgynous monster face. I would totally chase you, both my character and the real me." when all he really wants to do is thresh wheat on his farm. Like seriously imagine having to be Protomorph and not only try to break through that glass while Danny McBride flaunts his disgusting body in a pilot's chair, the favorable lighting barely concealing his ounce of weed and leathery skin, and just sit there, take after take, hour after hour, while perfected perfected his scared face. Not only having to tolerate his monstrous fricking visage but Danny's attitude as everyone on set tells him he's STILL GOT IT and DAMN, DANNY LOOKS LIKE *THAT*?? because they're not the ones who have to sit there and watch his fricking gremlin face contort into types of grimaces you didn't even know existed before that day. You've been cultivating nothing but a healthy diet of Durum and hard winter wheats and later alleged rye grass for your ENTIRE CAREER coming straight out of the boonies of you farm. You've never even imagined anything this fricking disgusting before, and now you swear you can taste the sweat that's breaking out from under his hat as he breaths in and out to writhe frightened at you, Danny smugly assured that you are enjoying the opportunity to get paid to sit there and revel in his "statuesque (for that is what he calls it)" beauty, the beauty he worked so hard for with personal trainers in the previous months. And then the director calls for another take, and you know you could kill every single person in this room before the studio security could put you down, but you squat there and endure, because you're fricking Protomorph. You're not going to lose your future harvest over this. Just bear it. Hide your face and bear it.

  13. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    promethius was a mess of compromised ideas and covenant carried on the shit
    killing shaw off screen horribly (worked in alien 3 rite? No Ridley, no it diddnt)
    wiping away an interesting alien race to avoid any difficult writing situations.
    bringing in the aliens (this is what you want??? righto, erm, lets have 2 people killed by one in the shower, that worked in all those other films)
    Lets not forget: it bursts out a guys back this time!!!! heckin diddnt see that coming did you???
    i got filtered by a hack movie with arty pretentions that dont matter because the film is an infantile slasher tier flick

  14. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Is this a real movie that came out? Who still watches this series

  15. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Covenant was so bad it made Prometheus look good

  16. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Literally the only good part of the movie is the David/Walter jumpscare which was admittedly pretty good

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      You already know it’s David at the end because he has wounds and scrapes but Walter’s skin fixes itself. I guess the covenant crew kind of forgot Walter could do that.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I didn't mean the ending scene, I meant the scene where David's being a homosexual and then quickly deactivates Walter and Walter makes that creepy face. However you're right though, the ending twist was pretty obvious

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      David is the best part. Him occupying himself with cerebral activities on a day to day basis would have been more entertaining than the aliens. But then it wouldn't be alien.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Have him do that with the aliens. Make it like The Island of Doctor Moreau without the normal characters.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        His characterization in the first film is much better where it was less clear-cut that he was an out and out villain and there was always that creepy unreadable ambiguity to his delivery. Deciding to make him straightforwardly a villain in Covenant was less interesting, although they offset it by having the David/Walter dynamic. Either way Fassbender acts the shit out of both movies and was too good for them honestly. Unrelated but I can always feel a touch of Roy Batty to his portrayal in Prometheus too

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >straightforwardly a villain
          He doesn't think of himself as a villain, but I love how in Covenant he plays it up for the humans since they come to see him as one anyway.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Have him do that with the aliens. Make it like The Island of Doctor Moreau without the normal characters.

        Holy frick
        >we will NEVER have a Prometheus 3 with David on the Covenant with a bunch of aliens in containment trying to commune with them
        FRICK

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Imagine the kino if Scott and Cronenberg would link up for it. Need it.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        This is moronic. It's a robot. "Exercise" is just pointless millage that will hasten the need for maintenance. He should either be doing something useful or staying perfectly still.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Oh look, someone who hasn't even watched the movie spouting their moronic opinion as if it were smart. Yawn.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          It's an android whose model was discontinued because it was so similar to humans they found it unnerving.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Normal people don't larp as Harlem Globetrotters. If it were a hyper realistic model it would spend inordinate amounts of time on the toilet look at its phone.
            They got discontinued because all the pointless showboating both irritated people and caused unnecessary wear on the machine.

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              It's funny they feel they need to create androids to do their evil bidding when simply waving a few bucks in front of a human's face will get the job done for much cheaper.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                All the experts they hand picked for that trillion dollar mission were incompetent morons though. Weyland should have had a 100% android crew.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                And the apologists would come in and say "He used the cheapest, most-broken-ass androids to save money that's why they map-bot got lost, and the animal-bot ran away from the alien. Some moronic shit like that.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Bunch of goldbricking union gays. Bring up the bonus situation again and you're all getting replaced by androids.

  17. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    what if
    rite
    what
    if
    the chestburster
    yeah?
    comes out his back?
    *pulls basedface and waits for applause that doesnt ever happen

  18. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >the year is 1997
    >despite one miss with Alien 3, Alien is still precariously considered a premium IP based on the cultural clout of its first two installments, widely regarded as two of the best movies ever made
    >Alien Resurrection is on the horizon
    >the film that will make or break the IP's premium status by returning to form, or not
    >you wait with bated breath
    >Resurrection comes out
    >it's a hokey, schlocky B-movie
    >it's literally over, Alien is dead, this is the final nail in the coffin, let's pack it up
    >the year is 2024
    >Alien hasn't been considered a premium IP for what feels like a century
    >the AVP films were shit and three films in the series since '79 and '86 aspire to be high art philosophical thoughtpieces but fall short and are cringe to watch
    >the EU has been nothing but dogshit for decades
    >Resurrection is the one entry in the series post-Aliens that has no pretensions and actually delivers on its premise
    >it's a genuinely entertaining sci-fi horror/action mash-up that doesn't try to dupe you into thinking it's Plato's lost work or include a buttload of hamfisted literary allusions
    >it's genuinely fun to watch, has a couple kino performances and a memorable cast, a waifu worth dying for, and some pretty fricking horrifying/trippy scenes
    >suddenly it doesn't seem so bad and actually seems ahead of its time for being self-aware that the series isn't premium any more and just embracing that
    >you realize, too late, that it was the last good Alien film

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      You’re almost right but AVP1 btfos A:R. My taste is definitely way too spicy for this board:
      >Alien 3 > AVP1 > Aliens > Alien > A:R
      Throw in Predator 1 and that’s my Alien headcannon right there.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous
      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Not a single chance Aliens is better than Alien, if for no other reason than the child actors in Aliens.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          I’m basing that a lot on scenes I like from each film.
          >Alien3: Newt/Hicks eulogy
          >AVP: xeno kills 2 predators
          >Aliens: turret hallway
          >Alien: Ripley racing to the escape pod at the end
          >AR: xenos breaching containment
          All absolutely kino scenes which greatly affects how much I like each movie.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Alien was far shittier because of the animal actor in Alien. It didn't help them a bit and got several of them killed including almost Ripley.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            This is a Jonesy board, sweaty.

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              I want justice for Spike. He was a good boy and did nothing wrong.

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              Reminder that he was originally supposed to be a talking cat.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >Alien 3 and AVP above 1 and Aliens
        >Aliens above Alien 1

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Ressurrection knew it was schlock and went with it, kind of like Predator 2 but not as kino as that. I still think the Xenos look they best they ever have in that film except for the CGI swimming shit.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      A:R sucked. Extremely israeli cast even for hollywood.
      Alien 3 (directors cut) is highly underrated.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >Alien 3 (directors cut) is highly underrated

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Both are underrated.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >Extremely israeli cast even for hollywood.
        Ron Perlman and Winona Ryder are israeli. Who else?

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Could you stop interrupting his non-existent argument with reality?

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      We are not doing this. Resurrection is shit, end of discussion.

  19. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    How are the alien books?
    Thinking of reading bug hunt cause I like military scifi

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      For the comic book novelizations just read the comics instead. Or arguably don't since the art is dogshit for a lot of them. Original stories kind of vary in quality but it's mostly dogshit with a couple good ones

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Avoid anything with characters or relatives of characters from the movies.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Some of the New stuff is pretty good actually. There are a lot of older books that aren't too canon anymore since they predate a few movies but tend to be better than them anyway

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      There's quite a few, varying from mediocre fan fiction to actually great novels that stand as high quality sci-fi on their own.

      The novels I'd really recommend are Phalanx by Scott Stigler and Cold Forge by Alex White. Those two are actually great.

      Then there's a trilogy adapted as audiodrama. Out of the Shadows, River of Pain, Sea of Sorrows. They're okay

      William Gibson's script for Alien 3 is quite interesting too.

      Bug Hunt, I remember reading it, and I remember it being completely forgettable.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Thanks anon. I like short stories which is why I was considering bug hunt

        Thought about it and realized I like alien series yet I've never read an EU books. Yet I've done it for star wars and star trek so figure I should do it

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      The new black, white & blood series is quite entertaining, also the What if...? with Burke is getting interesting as well.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        It was a bad call, Paul

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Is Burke just on LV 426 trying to get specimens by himself or what

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          He hijacks Ripley's ship and kills all survivors on behalf of the company, only for them to use him as a scapegoat for everything xenomorph related.
          The story follows him in his 60's, everybody thinks he's a genocidal c**t so he comes with the brilliant idea of getting an egg to harvest the embryo so he can become the man who cured cancer (since those bastards can basically rewrite their dna when they impregnate and fuse with another species).

  20. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Alien fans don't like Prometheus and Prometheus fans don't like Alien.

  21. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    The looney tunes tier falling down was a bit to much

  22. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    the contrarianism of this board will never cease to amaze.
    you know, it's funny because film twitter is just as contrarian. truly two sides of the same coin

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >if you don't share the majority's opinion you are le contrarian
      Go back to Twitter.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        You and your kind are just asking what people didn't like, then repeating it back in a stupid homosexual voice, and acting like they're not legitimate criticisms since you don't have any actual argument to support the movie. That's contrarian and you know it, redditor.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Contrarianism isn’t real. It’s a concept invented by redditors to explain why everyone doesn’t like, dislike, and think the same things.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Trips of truth.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >durrr I reply to myself therefore I win

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            moron.

  23. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    A movie has to be good to work as a filter though... This movie went against everything that made the original Alien great.

  24. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    The middle act is the worthwhile part of the movie, shame Fox had to cuck Ridley out of making the entire movie like it.

  25. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    It didn't. It's just genuinely bad. I was on board with Prometheus. I liked the ideas it presented and would have liked a proper sequel. Instead we got this weird amalgamation of a movie that doesn't know what it wants to be. Aside from a few good David scenes it doesn't do a good job of continuing the Prometheus story. All the characters are comically stupid and I didn't care about any of them. There's no tension or horror whatsoever. Everything is so frantic and fast it completely misunderstands what Alien is supposed to be.

  26. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    because it was dumb and shitty

  27. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Re-watched Prometheus and this recently, and Covenant is so superior. Mainly because of David.
    Aliens are ironically the least interesting part.

  28. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >rewatching it right now
    GET OUT OF MY HEAD
    the short haired chick is so cute bros

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      She has a super cute haircut in one of the promotional interviews.

  29. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    moronic story and characters and Scott has lost any sense of filming tense, atmospheric or fearful scenes. The way the Xenos just jump around feels like a videogame. I get that you can't make them slow moving like the OG film, but even Cameron's film allowed them to have presence.

  30. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    this and prometheus are 100% kino and should be watched in 1 (one) sitting. De David arc is the best arc since Ripley. David is the new Ripley.

  31. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I wrote a third prequel, called Alien: Sophocles. It's about a big space guy that crushes people's heads with a club.

  32. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Alien. In which:
    John gets Hurt
    Tom gets Skerrit
    Harry Dean isn't left Stanton
    and Ian doesn't get to go Holm

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      that was funny well done anon

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      and in which Yaphet didn't get to Kotto bout the bonus situation

  33. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Aliens is a good to trash scifi series that pretends to be high art.

    Predator meanwhile successulfully emulates literature like Moby Dick without coming off as pretentious.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Alien:
      >1: good
      >2: great
      >3: watchable
      >4: great
      >Prometheus: good
      >Covenant: watchable

      Predator:
      >1: good
      >2: watchable
      >the one with the pianist guy: watchable
      >the moronic autist movie: utter shit
      >Prey: watchable, should've focused on the brother

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Honestly never seen all of either series. Can't bring myself to finish some of them
        >Alien:
        >1: watchable
        >2: great
        >3: trash
        >4: never finished it. Just seems weird
        >Prometheus: watchable (sometimes)
        >Covenant: unironically gay
        >Predator:
        >1: great
        >2: good (wouldve been better had they cast seagal)
        >predators: good
        >the predator: stopped watching cause it looked like trash when starting it
        >Prey: watchable.

        3 good to great movies > 1 great movie

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >>1: watchable
          talk about filtered..

  34. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    When did you realize AvP is better than alien?

  35. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Porm and Cov sucked
    >Verification not required.

  36. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Speaking of Prometheus, do you remember that haggard looking kinda ugly woman? I bet she does great dirty talk while giving great handjobs. God I want to frick her.

  37. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    space bugs are so boring compared to engineer kino

  38. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Because it was doo doo stanky

  39. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    kek imagine thinking you're smart for liking this steaming pile of shit

  40. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Awesome moves, all of them
    >Alien
    Classic science-fiction pulp, critter on a spaceship in the A.E. van Vogt Coeurl and all the rest tradition. Set a standard for creepy ridgy monsters with the Giger look.
    >Aliens
    The amazingly PHYSICAL one, props the like of which you will never see again, the far-future dungeon hack. Machines that look PERFECTLY REAL AND FUNCTIONAL. Queen is amazing.
    >Alien 3
    The talky one, dialog so good they could make a stage play out of it. People are way more interesting than the creatures.
    >Resurrection
    The comic bookish one, beautiful colors, perfectly good CGI for the time, wonderful props, great angles, wacky action, a story that is far, far better than it has a right to be.
    >Prometheus + Covenant
    Showcase of David, world-building, great architect race, lost bioweapons from spacefaring gengineering-haters, fantastic monsters that are variants on the familiar xeno.

    Hey, if you hate any of these you are just a fricking lame-ass homosexual. I don't care. You can't find anything to watch because you vastly overrate your taste and intelligence and lack the eye to pick out the uniquely appealing qualities of different films.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Yeah. Aliengays are lame

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        So the fandom is actually why the Prometheus trilogy died? Frick those guys!

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Because Prometheus has no fans and just tried to hijack a pre-existing fan base

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >if you think that any of these folks are shit... you just have bad taste
      no, I am able to recognize when shit is shit. I don't try to delude myself into thinking that something is good simply because it has a couple of aspects that are decent.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Kiddo, you just like sniffing your own fat, sweaty farts. Do some popcorn box tricks for us, eh? You don't give a shit about whether the movie's good or not really, just "Will this movie give me a platform to SHOWCASE MY VERY REAAAAL INTELLIGENCE THROUGH NITPICKY DISSATISFACTION?"

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          this. so much this.
          Cinemaphile needs to stop criticizing movies and think about the hard work that people put into them. people like joss whedon are true visionaries. these grumpy fat film snobs need to just let. people. enjoy things.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        But if all the films in a series hit all the exact same points and have the same strengths, they're all basically the same and that's boring. What's wrong with engaging with an individual work's greatest strengths, then?

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Based Alien enjoyer

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        kino comic

  41. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    The concept of people turning into Aliens wasn't that be, would have been like a more terrifying The Fly

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Wasn't that be? What do you mean? Man they did turn people into monsters, shit was scary, and monster man fricked Shaw before you turned completely monster, and she C-sectioned a monster baby that was like a giant face hugger.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        They were not monsters, not Aliens, they suffered some moronic disease that turned them crazy

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >Crazy
          homie was growing hair in weird places and had super monster strength. If he wasn't a monster, nobody in film land is.

  42. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Prometheus exposed a lot of people as pseuds. It has all the right ingredients on paper, and it SHOULD be good, but it isn't. Since the morons on here can't distinguish good films from bad films they can't wrap their head around why people constantly mock the prequels. The massive cope causes them to make threads defending this shit in the hope they will convince other people that it wasn't fricking garbage. These people adore CGI. They like femme frickboy androids. They say moronic things like "if you didn't like the movie you should read the book." As if not liking a movie is a specific reason to read the novelization. It's sad and pathetic.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Only pseuds exposed by Promtheus are the "muh scientists" crowd.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I think you're judging this movie on what it should have could have might have been rather than for what it is. Case in point, the titular Prometheus. you had to google who the frick Prometheus was supposed to represent in the movie because the movie doesn't say shit. You google and find out that it make more sense in the screenplay, but the screenplay was... whatever the frick it turned out to be and they didn't use that material. So then someone else comes in and says "wtf Prometheus why that name it has no bearing on the film?" And you explain parts of the book that aren't in the movie, and then you're like "See? The movie makes sense."

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Prometheus . . . is a great movie. Can't see a reason why it isn't. David is a riveting villain, absolutely, background is genuinely interesting. It makes me really sad that I can't get a Covenant sequel because everybody just so happens to be a Dunning-Kruger moron who picks on good movies to get back at his mom or something.

  43. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    WORT WORT WORT

  44. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous
    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      This isn't even tense. It's just annoyingly silly.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      i mean... its kinda realistic. youre seeing your ship-mate get mauled to FRICKING DEATH by some thing that just popped the frick outta your other shipmate, and theres blood everywhere and youre freaking the frick out and you slip on the blood.
      the real issue is why doesnt the Med-bay have non-slip floors?

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      The CGI on the Neomorph is awful

  45. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    the ancient aliens stuff turned people off. also the jesus reference, and europeans are almost being singled out as special. Its no wonder it ticked off a lot of "people" who are more pro establishment history and antiwhite.

  46. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Millennial writing

  47. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    It was awful, I'm afraid. I did everything in my power to like it. But I couldn't.

  48. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >film in Australia
    >It's a bad alien film

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