Why don't they just remake Jurassic Park at this point? make it horror and rated R like the novel
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Why don't they just remake Jurassic Park at this point? make it horror and rated R like the novel
Why don't they just remake Jurassic Park at this point? make it horror and rated R like the novel
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Shopping Cart Returner Shirt $21.68 |
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>remake
no, they're all shit and i'm tired of it
It wouldn't be a remake technically, just a proper adaption of the book. Like The Thing vs The Thing from another world.
He wrote his own adaptation
FPBP
Even if they were to remake it and be true to the novel and gritty and horror driven, I’d still groan at the concept. Hollywood is already so creatively bankrupt and “surviving” on reboots, remakes, and sequels; they don’t need this fodder for the flame
fpbp
10 year ban on reboot/remake/reimagining/sequel/shared cinematic universe is the only thing that can save Hollywood at this point
The book is far better than the movie, and I like the movie a lot. But the movie is very dumbed down for normies.
yeah I've read the book, it doesn't need another movie based on it
if you want a Dino horror movie, they should do Dino crisis. or any original property really, just for the love of God make something new.
I'd take Capcom just remaking Dino Crisis like they did with Resi 2 over a film based on it.
The should make a film based on that pinball game I had as a kid where they crash on an island with dinos and ancient temples and there's an evil scientist turning people into dino slaves and if you lose on of the tables there's a wonky mid 90s video game cgi cutscene where your hot big titty party member gets turned into a dinosaur and it fricked me up for life
>remake Jurassic Park in cgi slop
>old movie with cgi looks better than nu-movie with cgi
Why does this keep happening?
because CGI at the time took super computers and state of the art geniuses working around the clock for millions of dollars to make cutting edge stuff. while today's CGI is outsourced to the cheapest indian guy living in a hut making it on his stolen Iphone 3.
Then how come movies have gotten so expensive? Does it all go to the marketing department?
JP was made only with 63 million dollars (and a futher 65 million in advertising) so it's not exactly made on a shoe string budget either.
also T2 had, like, 8 effects hot or something? your avg marble moobie has like 300 and still needs to be done in 8 months and also the producers and directors keep changing the shots and adding shit, whereas back in the 90 they had to pre plan EVERYTHING because effect shot were sooooo fricking expensive.
same with JP, it has afaik 8 minutes of CGI shots
Still looks good.
How much does it cost to make one marvelslop product?
A faithful adaptation would be nice. It's much more of a horror story. The chaperone guy being played with by that young carnivore until it finally kills him is one of the most memorable things I've ever read.
Ed Regis and the juvenile Rex?
Yee
>book nedry got stalked, blinded, disemboweled, and carried off head first by the adult dilophosaurus while still alive
the dilo got done so dirty by spielberg, even his reasoning for changing the way it looked was stupid
going to stand behind spielberg on this one. changing the dilophosaur to be smoll might have ruined my favorite theropod's sole life action appearence. but it does help normies who don't know anything differentiate them from the raptors.
that poor Dilo got a tummy ache from all the high-fructose corn syrup in Nedry's blood
The book is shit and I'm tired of pretending it's not. Yes, the actual scenes with the dino attacks are great and terrifically horrific in their gruesome detail... but they're few and far between and all separated by dozens of pages of Crichton jerking himself off.
Lost World is even worse - hell LW doesn't even have a proper fricking climax, it just runs out of story.
I like Crichton jerking himself off when he does a good job of it like in The Andromeda Strain, Congo, Sphere, and in my opinion also Jurassic Park. It's just that after Jurassic Park his quality of writing took a nosedive. Like, I'm sympathetic to a lot of his politics but State of Fear read like bad fan fiction, it was really fricking bad writing. Crichton's characters have never been very fleshed out but this was like paper-thin.
>I like Crichton jerking himself off
After reading most of his books I realize that the fundamental problem with Crichton is he's the epitome of "an idea guy". The settings and story synopses he comes up with are fricking genius, but then the actual content and character are usually poorly thought out and mostly just an excuse for him to wax about whatever his social hot take of the year is or tell everybody about some new thing he learned about. Case in point, Jurassic Park is 10% dinosaurs, 50% Crichton whining about corporatism, and 40% Crichton doing a half-assed ramble about his layman's understanding of chaos theory and statistics.
Sphere is another one with such an enticing and intriguing setup that actually does very little with it.
He actually knew it was his problem and never thought he was a good writer and it gnawed on his insecurities.
He approached writing very clinically and through brute force, often by talking a prototype book and writing a techno thriller using it beats. He talked about this with Congo on how he used king Solomons mines as the blueprint
He did the same with eaters of the dead and baewolf
Yeah he's best when when he doesn't lecture you too much but just mentions some interesting science or tech every now and then. Some of his later books feel like he's really trying to push a certain worldview on you and even if I agree with parts of that worldview it doesn't work, he doesn't have the subtlety as a writer to pull that off and it ends up weird.
That's really fricking interesting for me to learn as a wannabe novelist who is curious about how to write a best-selling really entertaining book that grips people and makes them not put it down until they're done, rather than writing some literary stuff off that bores 95% of people.
You ought to look up the interviews Crichton did and read Steven kings on writing.
I have read On Writing, it was pretty interesting and I value his insights since he is someone who as far as I know really did write his way into fame without the benefit of a lot of nepotism. I should go look up more Crichton interviews though.
Crichton is interesting because the Harvard English department was so hard on him he gave up writing and switched to anthropology to be a doctor.
He submitted a George Orwell short story as his own and got a b- and realized it was time for him to give up the dream.
Then he desperately needed money in medschool and wrote a short potboiler and it sold.
He wrote a few more books when he realized he wasn’t talented enough for literature but had a niche in writing easily readable thrillers competing with movies on flights and people trapped in airports and that colored his approach.
The only really personal art was ER as that was about him and his medschool experiences
>The book is shit and I'm tired of pretending it's not
Go back
the lost world book is shit, yes
but the first book is great, if you just want a gore fest read some Zahler instead
Why do normies love jurassic park so much?
>dinosaur go RAWR!!!
is that it?
Because they were discovered by heckling science and there's no way T-Rex arms are from another animal that's heckin stupid an anti-Science
>being this buck broken
>NO MY HECKIN DINOSAURS ARE... LE REAL!!!!
>Scientists now say dinosaurs all had feathers
They'll refuse to update the fairy tale creatures because then they'd have to admit science got it wrong
>he doesn't know
>Scientists now say dinosaurs all had feathers
They've suggested some had feathers based on obvious fricking feather imprints on fossils. No one has said "all dinosaurs had feathers" you dishonest git.
Huxley was saying dinosaurs were birds in the 1880s
No one listened
>Scientists now say dinosaurs all had feathers
No they don't, stop parroting moronic reddit shit, you moronic redditor.
Small dinosaurs like raptors for example probably had feathers to some degree but the large ones certainly didn't. The larger and animal the more hairless they are. Look at elephants compared to smaller animals in the same environment. Too much heat produced by the body for hair, and dinosaurs got way bigger than elephants
uh huh...
considering that boy lived in permafrost that isn't the "gottem" you think it is. yutyrannus (the one feathered rex-relative) we have lived in a area comparable to British Columbia, canada. (a place that gets tonnes of snow more then half of the year) so it expressing the basal feathered genes of it's ancestors isn't any more confusing then the hairy mammoth expressing the basal hairy genes of a mammal. and doesn't disapprove a non-feathered Trex or a non hairy elephant.
>the larger ones certainly werent
hold up everyone, Dr. Cinemaphile has entered the thread!
>Look at elephants
like this one?
Yes.
If you need some "deeper" meaning or social messaging in your movies then you belong on reddit.
>Why do normies like entertaining film
A real frickin' mystery this one.
>dinosaur go RAWR!!!
>is that it?
what more reason could you possibly want?
Basado and rawrpilled.
I just like how well it holds up after 30 years. Well-made practical effects are so much better than modern day green screen slop.
very obvious underage contrarian post. us ChatGPT next time to punch it up
>normies
shut the frick up
QRD on the differences in Jurassic Park the book
It starts with a baby in a crib being eaten by compies.
Hammond is less "rich idealist eccentric" and more "shyster who sews a monkey to a fish and calls it a mermaid".
changing hammond was probably the only thing the movie did better than the book
They use a rocket launcher to blow up a raptor nest after a tense sneaking sequence if I remember right.
The reasoning behind the rpgs being on the island in the first place is metal as frick. The dinos have a decentralized nervous system, meaning that even a blow directly to their brain won't kill them.
really? is that a thing?
So the modern jurassic world movies are actually more in line with the books?
i like the fact that not a single weapon hits a dino in the movie. humans are powerless against nature
Timmy gets fricked up a lot more in the book, like he should be dead in the book.
What's lil timmy gonna do...when them dinos come through?
they blown up the island in the book
come to find out john spared no expense and had another island
Ian actually gets bit by the Trex in the scene where the Trex breaks free or its cage and dies at the end from his wounds. But then in the Lost World book he's magically alive because Spielberg demanded it.
Yeah Crichton really hated the idea of reviving his "rockstar scientist" self insert, it was all Spielberg's doing.
It literally was Shekelberg's fault because as soon as Jurassic Park wrapped up he had Jeff Goldblum already slotted for the sequel.
How did Speilbwrg have any control over what Crichton wrote?
The Lost World (book) sequel only exists because the first movie was successful. Crichton obviously didn't care about it except he liked money.
Wait was the book written after the movie was made?
The Lost World was written after / because the Jurassic Park movie was commercially successful. It's a cynical artless cash-in.
I don't know about that. It's clearly not as inspired as the first, but I think the book deals with the ramification of genetic research far more than the first though. A lot of retreading and Chrichton basically admitted he wrote it understanding he had a whole audience of children interested in his work.
the dinosaurs are a metaphor
The book goes a lot more into the brutality of dinosaurs. People don't just scream "ahhh I'm dead" they get eaten while still alive. You know, exactly how an animal with no concept of mercy would consume something.
It shows you that nature is brutal and uncaring rather than have gay exposition by Jeff Goldblum spell it out for you.
Book also implies the dinosaurs are just genetic freaks Hammond has Wu make to vaguely resemble dinoaaurs and that they're all badly socialized/mentally and physically defective to point that early subjects would run headfirst repeatedly into the electric fences.
They're also constantly getting sick in ways their Vet is scratching his head at how to cure them, some of the animals just kill each other since there's no real study of their pack behavior, and they attemped to remove the dilos' venom sacs, but they either plucked out the wrong things, or those frickers grow back.
Oh yeah the foamy toxin stuff, forgot about that
>It shows you that nature is brutal and uncaring rather than have gay exposition
I suddenly want an JP audiobook read by Werner Herzog.
Wonder if we can train AI to do that.
The bit from the book that always stuck with me was how they were also cloning extremely poisonous extinct plants and were so careless they were using them as landscaping decorations around the swimming pool.
You know how in the movie Alan finds dinosaur eggs deep inside the park past the fences? Well in the book he finds them right off the side off the road before any of the dinosaurs have even broke out, like we're supposed to believe every single person in the park is moronic and didn't notice this shit when driving through because arrogance or some dumb shit. Bookgays acting like Crichton was genius is fricking embarrassing.
actually the book mentions that no one really goes into the park, it's the backside of all the heavy automation of the park. only really the vet's and muldoon see the park in the flesh.
Nedry's death is brutal.
Hammond is an butthole and dies.
Muldoon doesn't die and spends a good portion of the book killing raptors with a rocket launcher. Sequel forgets to even mention him.
Tim is the older sibling now, who I think was competent but I can't recall.
Lex is now like six, she's completely useless and screams and cries all the time, it's understandable but completely obnoxious. Spielberg made a good call in changing her completely.
Malcolm dies until the sequel retconned his death, goes on a tirade while dying that seems a little out of place but is genuinely prescient about humanity treating science as the new religion, it reads like a manifesto though.
Don't forget Henry Wu gets graphically killed by a raptor in front of half the characters
I probably forgot a lot, I listened to the audiobook recording of it years ago.
Reading the physical book is one that definitely enhances the experience. Every chapter begins with a visual of chaos theory and its effects. Audiobooks are fine but the physical book adds a lot to Jurassic Park.
I have some vague fond memories of taking hours-long long baths and reading Crichton books in there when I was an early teen
>Lex is now like six, she's completely useless and screams and cries all the time, it's understandable but completely obnoxious. Spielberg made a good call in changing her completely.
This. The kids are unbearably annoying
Like how Muldoon's entire character is that he's an expert on animals, dangerous game. He tries to lay it out explicitly that nature isn't beautiful in the slightest and possess a wholly un-romanticized view on animals and nature as a whole. Even finding the concept of us "needing to coexist with nature" laughable bullshit that our prehistoric ancestors fought to free us from.
Hammond falls into a ravine and is ripped apart screaming by compys. His death is used in the second movie by the guy who goes to take a piss and falls.
The book is much worse and Spielberg did Crichton a favour
so cute :3
They literally worked on the movie together before he wrote the book. Spielberg and him were friends
The lawyer is a ripped badass and fights a raptor
Hammond takes Nedry up on his offer to get a soda from the vending machine.
The dinos in the book aren’t depicted with a sense of wonder or awesomeness, they’re just unholy genetic abominations that are deservedly and fittingly napalmed to death at the end.
My fave part was in Lost World.
FU SPEILBURGER
[Spoiler]there's sensors all over the island that stupidly only count downwards, when this is corrected it turns out there dinosaurs have been breeding almost from the get go and a bunch of them have made it to the mainland[/spoiler]
Its perfectly spelled out in the book, the park is a full on mess with everyone being underpaid and understaffed. Nedry took the contract as the lowest bidder, and then got lawyered into essentially running the entire park with no extra compensation, so its full of bugs and he just flat doesn't give a frick.
They make multiple mentions of the seams immediately coming apart in the book at even just a moments glance.
In the book Nedry completes the work and the systems he wrote are failing and is required to come back on his expense to fix the issues. The issues being the dinosaurs were breeding, when they were not supposed to. They discover the raptor nest through the course of the book. The raptors they engage with actually get bigger, cause most of the ones muldoon and the lawyer are killing are younglings. The adult full size raptors show up at the end.
The lawyer who gets eaten by a T-rex on the toilet in the movie is actually the hero of the book
The lawyer who gets eaten in the movie is actually two different characters in the book
His role is superfluous. Also gets punched like a b***h by dumb action hero Grant. Crichton was doing his best Clive Cussler impression.
>Why don't they just do cools things that would appeal to consumers instead?
because that's not what they're about.
This. Appealing to seething race/gender war morons brings much more attention and streaming service subscriptions.
If something is just cool and fun then there's not much discussion about it and therefore normies will not go "hmm i've heard of these ones" when choosing which services they subscribe to.
no its perfect
Because horror movies don't gross billions of dollars per entry at the cinema and spur mass market merch lines.
neither do 99% of the movies they make.
Yes, but Jurassic Park has shown itself to do that multiple times so they're not going to change a winning formula. Blame Spielberg.
Jurassic Park IS a horror movie. That's why they are hiding for 90% of it and dinos are killing people left and right
Horror movies usually generate considerable profit if they’re successful. The issue is more that something like Jurassic Park would require considerably more money to make due to the dinosaurs related SFX and that would make it way more expensive than your average horror movie budget
If it were a miniseries and the first episode was just the village on that island being slowly invaded by compys it could be one of the best episodes of television.
Crichton intended his novel to be more like the film but was persuaded by his editor to turn it into dino horror instead
afaik the movie's production had nothing to do with the first book, maybe you're confusing it with tlw which was written to somewhat tie in with the movie at spielberg's request, who then ignored 90% of the book and just kept a couple characters and the island
What was the last film as big as these old ones (jurrasic park, Ghostbusters)?
Avatar or some capeslop
That's what I was thinking.
Capeslop doesn't really count as it's so shallow
Avatar.. yes that was huge and the hype was huge crap film though and damn.. that was 13 years ago
It was released in 2010.. r-right guys
2009.
>Avatar
No, there was very little hype for the first Avatar leading up to its opening weekend. A lot of people even thought that it would bomb.
Jurassic Park had massive hype long before it debuted because of the book and the incredible marketing campaign.
I'd say Phantom Menace, the marketing machine around that movie was absolutely insane, even peak capeshit doesn't come close.
Never mind that the movie didn't turn out to be very good, you couldn't escape it in early 1999.
avatar
Imagine how weird it would be if all mammals died out except bats and their descendants
This is actually incredibly likely to happen. Bat species are all over the world. They are not yet as hardy and able to travel with limited caloric burn like many bird species. Extinction level events will occur on earth again.
That said, pockets of other types exist. We still have alligators and sea turtles for example.
>Extinction level events will occur on earth again.
Whatever happens, burrowing rodents will be the best equipped to survive it
>but bats live in caves
that is to their credit, but they must leave those caves to hunt. And if fruit trees and flying insects are scarce because of the surface being scoured by some cataclysm, then the bats are fricked. On the other hand, burrowing rodents can survive below ground for years, eating worms and tubers and whatnot.
10/10 webm
The dark knight is the last time I remember the entire country captivated by a movie.
Someone might say avengers end game but no one in my family ever saw it.
Dark Knight,even my fricking grandma watched it
Probably the first Avengers film for the crossover novelty.
>the dinosaur killed someone... But in a BOOK! AHHHH IM GOING INSANE
Jurassic Park is an unironic the book was better movie. LotR bookgays can keep seething about the movies being better than the books
>that period where every book Crichton wrote was adapted into kino
Never knew how good we had it
>JP 1998-1993
>Congo 1980-1995
>Lost World 1995-1997
>Sphere 1987-1998
>13th Warrior 1976-1999
>Timeline 1999-2003
>Prey 2002....
mfw waiting on the Prey adaptation
>Andromeda Strain 2008
not part of the 10 year Crichtonaissance
you mean 1971
They already filmed The Andromeda Strain in 1971, and it's a good movie
I would kill for a good adaption of Dragon's Teeth or even micro
>I would kill for a good adaption
how about yourself?
I plan to immolate myself infront of disneyland in florida.
In minecraft, right?
in real life of course
waiting on airframe
I kinda remember that reading Airframe was interesting because of all the info dump about how investigations work until Crichton turned it into an action book halfway through and it got silly.
They would never make State of Fear today but I remember it being cool. I was about 14 when I read it and I think it was about the world trying to kill a group of climate scientists with natural disasters or something.
>Timeline 1999-2003
>Paul Walker
>Gerard Butler
how did I miss this?
Because it's pretty meh.
>Directed by Gigachad Richard Donner
Unbelievable how shit it is
Don't forget Rising Sun
LOOOOOL, someone should make this today but keep the time period and have it be VERY tongue in cheek.
>NOOO! The Japs R taking Over!! REEE! PEARL HARBOR!!!
I should reread Congo. I still remember watching the film right after finishing it and losing my fricking mind when the it ended with monkeys being cut in half with a laser gun.
Just remember, STOP EATING THE SESAME CAKE
how do we go back...I hate this timeline
Soon the time of fricking around is over and the time of finding out will be here brother
I loved the book. I still vividly remember the numbers on the computer and the reveal that dinosaurs were breading
The book is the reason why Alex Jones said they're turning the frogs gay. Jurassic Park is insanely influential all over the place.
No that was an actual scientific paper on amphibian mutation in a specific polluted area.
But come on, Jurassic Park kept that discovery alive
Conservatives don’t read scientific papers
Anon that's Atrazine, the most common pesticide in America, which is banned in every other developed country because it makes kids moronic and literally turns frogs trans
Yeah, I suspect those scenes in the book were part of why I got a little bit interested in computer programming when I was in my early teens. That plus video games of course. Now I make money doing it.
Apparently the book/movie also helped to make a LOT of kids actually become paleontologists when they got older, which has probably contributed to the recent boom in dinosaur discoveries.
Chrichton was so based it's amazing he managed to publish all his books. Even in The Lost World, a book he didn't want to write, he managed to put so many based parts it's just great. I loved when Malcolm predicted how the Internet would ruin people to the point of making them NPCs repeating the same statement over and over again.
>read the book when I was 12
>saw the movie much much later
>mfw no math autism leading them to find out how the dinosaurs have actually had tons of young under their noses
really all of the great dramatic/tense scenes were gone, but people praise it for "muh effects" when none of the effects actually depict the twitchy, bird-like speed that the dinosaurs had
It's still a good movie. I can't hate it just because It's not as good as a book that takes hours to read.
It's a dogshit film too. Not even for the reasons I described; for those reasons it's a bad adaption, but as a film alone it's bad. Spielberg didn't make anything good in his life besides Duel and Close Encounters.
>muh plot
You have no idea what "good" even means if you think "story" or "plot" are the most important parts of a movie.
>Jurassic Park is a dogshit film
You're out of your fricking mind or so contrarian you probably think water from the purest natural source is bad for you.
>YOU'RE THIS CRAZY PERSON I MADE UP IN MY HEAD THAT'S WHY YOU CAME TO A DIFFERENT CONCLUSION THAN I
great response there bro
You're not fitting in, I don't know who you're trying to appeal to
>moron can't understand that not everyone acts for the approval of others like he does
lmao
boomers really came out of the woodwork to defend this piece of shit, didn't they?
>influential and well regarded movie
the first is entirely extrinsic and the second argument is entirely subjective
>The score alone is incredible
Every spielberg movie has the same score lmao
He also doesn't know how to use musical scores, but that's a different point
How is calling close encounters a snorefest (this movie literally put me to sleep when I saw it as a kid) in any way a defense of the movie?
I was just lumping you in with the boomers
because you are one
More like you can't read.
>accusing someone of being illiterate
>when you think "I fell asleep" is a criticism
An alien movie has to be pretty damn shit to put a kid to sleep.
>still thinking your subjective, extrinsic electrochemical reaction to something isn't completely distinct from what it actually is
the state of boomers lmfao
>subjective, extrinsic electrochemical reaction
wow you're so enlightened. "your brain is just like, chemicals man", that's a very relevant and compelling argument! Any more random science facts you wish to share, instead of talking about the movie?
>boomer can't understand the difference between thinking about the movie and thinking about his own thoughts
>"Y-you're this person I made up in my head! You believe THIS! A-And THIS! Even though you never said those things you CLEARLY believe them!"
Boomer, if you can't comprehend the difference between observation and reaction you shouldn't be talking about the quality of movies. Don't make up strawmen to cope.
>continues to rant about boomers for no discernible reason
Boring, I want more science facts
>"T-talk about the movie PWEASE"
All you ever talked about was your personal reaction to the film, not the film itself. You are literally incapable of discussing film, anon
lmfao
>he ran out of science facts
You're as boring as Third Encounters.
>lazy alcoholic boomer still can't present any arguments against close encounters
>arguments against close encounters
An alien movie so boring it puts children to sleep. Nuff said.
Let's review what happens in this movie:
>people have spooky dreams about a mountain
>they drive to the mountain
>they see an alien space ship
>it beeps
>fin
wow, such a great movie
>An alien movie so boring it puts children to sleep
Not an argument
Don't know who you're referring to, also the lion king sucked
>Don't know who you're referring to, also the lion king sucked
nice try dogfricker, we know it's you
Repeating something doesn't make it true lol, idk who that is.
>YOU DIDN'T REFUTE MY NON-ARGUMENT!!!
Damn that's crazy
Maybe try presenting an argument first?
Close Encounters is shit. People pretend to think it's great because critics told them it is, but there's a reason nobody ever makes threads about it. It's boring pointless drivel.
>more subjective, extrinsic points that have nothing to do with the movie itself
Lmao still not an argument, little buddy
If a movie doesn't entertain, inform or stimulate the mind in some way, then it is without merit. Close encounters is a snore-fest, which makes it indefensible. You haven't even bothered to defend the movie. I criticize the movie while all you do is try to insult me (and miss the mark by a mile. I first saw this movie on VHS in the 90s.)
>If a movie doesn't entertain, inform or stimulate the mind in some way
Still subjective and extrinsic.
Your argument isn't that it is intellectually barren, it's that you personally weren't entertained, which is entirely irrelevant to the movie itself.
You are essentially criticizing your own reaction, not the movie, and it's impressive how hard you try to brush by this fact.
>You haven't even bothered to defend the movie. I criticize the movie
That's your error, anon. You haven't criticized the movie itself at all.
>more insults of me
>still no defense of the movie, which you know is boring
>pointing out your logical errors and fallacious non-arguments is insulting you
There's no insult, anon. I'm just waiting for you to present a legitimate argument.
>can't even pretend to refute my plot summary of close encounters
damning
(My previous comment was a joke btw, I haven't actually fallen asleep while talking with you.)
Get back to work on the Lion King Review Dogfricker
>Jurassic Park is a bad film
this is the most dogshit take I've ever heard
The score alone is incredible
Watch him come back and say you're reddit spacing as his only defense of calling an objectively influential and well regarded movie dogshit
>Close Encounters
snorefest
zoomerfest
>grant discovers a nest in the movie and realized the dinosaurs are breeding
>it's never mentioned again
why bother including it if it adds nothing to the story?
The book was standard adventure pulp. That meme is a lie.
Honestly, Jurassic World came close to the biological use of velociraptors which was an entirely refreshing thing to see. Velociraptors running through Afghanistan and the caves.
>Shit. Come on, gents. It's grown-up time. Drones can't search tunnels and caves. And they're hackable. The minute a real war breaks out, all that fancy tech is gonna go dark.
Disappointing to see what happened to this franchise. Every movie is the same just with some bigger n + 1 GM clone.
Not a fan at all of militarized raptors but as a concept, raptors being "trained" was the next natural step after JPIII. It was a good call just done poorly.
I don't like the idea that the amusement park got noticed by the military to create weapons. It's just fricking moronic. It's hard enough to train an intelligent human to do something, let alone a fricking animal. There's a reason why there aren't militarized tigers right now.
moronic take. Yeah go just make another park like that hasn't been done before. Even when dinos roamed throughout the planet (after their own island got volcano'd) the best they could do was picrel.
Yeah realistically speaking velociraptors would get slaughtered against experienced soldiers armed with actual rifles and grenades and shit. Using raptors to clear caves would just end up with all your raptors dead and maybe like one guy on the other side dead. And that's when it comes to clearing caves. In combat in open fields human soldiers would kill raptors at like 10000-1 casualty rates in favor of the humans.
>Billions of dollars worth of ordnance to drop on people
>Let's spend even more money developing something that will only be 1% as effective and take a hundred times longer to deploy
You realize that the vast majority of military campaigns aren't "LOL, just drop bombs on them", right?
Tigers aren't social pack animals. The military does use dogs pretty extensively, and a raptor (at least in the JP universe) would be that, but bigger, smarter, and more agile. Not to mention, they can use genetic engineering to cherry pick whatever behavioral traits that they want, cutting out the need for countless generations of domestication and selective breeding.
That's not much of the issue by itself. The problem was that I was made in the most childish and contrived way ever. Sacrificing what could've been good horror elements for nu-MCU tier actions scenes.
Also the gun "guiding dinosaurs" is such a freaking stupid concept, expecially when you can just shoot the guy down
I think this is why Movies are dying, writers can create tons of stories quickly, with the best ones being picked up for production. While original screenplays are risky since you don't know if the audience even likes the idea. Same with anime, 100s of LNs some get turnt to manga and those few get turnt to anime which is used to advertise the LN
Movies just don't have any books since no one wants to read as much
>Movies just don't have any books since no one wants to read as much
Books are constantly being turned into movies. The difference in a that most of the books are usually the kind that vast majority of people have never heard of because there’s so many books being published these days and almost nobody talks about books let alone reads them anymore.
>in the film dinosaurs eat humans alive and rip their flesh off, cut them in half etc
>LOL this should be marketable to kids!
How the frick did they get away with it? Happy meals and toys targeted to 5 year old and the movie has all that shit in it. I don't get it.
kids have loved scary things since time immemorial
the alien franchise had toys and that was far less suitable for children
kids also love dinosaurs, that helped as well
Fricking ROBOCOP had children toys, and that´s a movie where one of the bad guys get horrorrifically desfigured by toxic waste.
There's shit in that book that will look absolutely fricking moronic on-screen. Don't even try to convince me that Muldoon 360 no-scoping a raptor with a rocket launcher will look good.
I like the novel a lot and I'd love to see this, but I doubt there is much audience for "hey, here's this beloved feel-good movie with the wonder-inspiring soundtrack that many of you have fond childhood memories of, but now it's dark and cynical and two main characters die at the end".
The movie basically jettisons a lot of the cynical corporate theme of the book and turns it into what is at its core a story about how a man learns to like being part of a family. Which helps to explain its magnetic effect and cross-demographic appeal. A movie accurate to the novel would likely have a harder time making money.
Michael Crichton is a talentless writer who only made utter shit. There are plenty of good books out there that haven't been ruined.
I’m sorry you are a liberal gay and were rectally ravaged by his attack on the global warming cult
You’re thinking of Stephen King.
Crichton developed the movie along side Spielberg, mater of fact he shared the plot of JP with Spielberg before it was written and planned out the movie
>Why don't they just remake Jurassic Park at this point?
They no longer have the talent to make a movie that will visually hold up to the original.
the movie is far better than the novel. The novel wastes so much time on unnecessary characters and plot points that the movie cuts out.
scientifically speaking, when are we going to fix this
I find the book and movie to be complementary so I really wouldn't care for a more accurate version.
all those dummies
that bird can kill
That's why they're trying to appease it...
What they're doing is the opposite of dumb. They're calm, bird is calm. Remain calm and it'll just wander off. Start screaming and running about and it disembowels the nearest child.
As long as you don't screw with the dangerous animals and they're not hungry enough to attack, you're not in much danger.
Emus can gut you too, but they used to wander around my small town chill as anything as long as you didn't spook them.
If you got one as a pet, would it be a good burglar deterrent?
Probably not, but it would make a good burglar murderer.
How about we get a dino crisis remake already, CAPCOM!?
Fricking buttholes spent a ton of money and time on that Exoprimal garbage that sold 0 copies when it could've made a DC remake and made a solid chunk of change
I still wish we got Jurassic Park Survival
I bet that once they're done with the RE remakes they're probably dig up that franchise
They got like what ? CV and RE5 to remake, I doubt they do 6
>noo dinosaurs can't have feathers because... I just don't like it!
kids like dinosaurs
so this makes more financial since, but the movie has plenty of thrills and chills you are just a corto- serotonin depleted slash gay gore hound sociopath with reduced brain function
dinosaurs are cool i like dinosaurs
I had a Trex toy growing up but it wasn't the one that could completely eat an action figure and shit it out. I was jealous of that one
What happened to Arnold in the book?
The same thing it happens in the movie, a raptor follows him in the generator room and kills him. If I remember right they intended to have the scene in the movie but they couldn't film it because there was an hurricane that trashed the set or something like that
Dinosaurs aren't really that interesting, past the initial early 90's hype of finally being able to depict them believably on screen.
I don't know why people keep pushing for JP to continue to exist as a thing.
Even the Godzilla series understands that the dinosaur is only really interesting for one or two movies, and then you have to up the ante and make him fight a three headed dragon or something.
Get a lot of this gay
>it's an animal, but old and dead
Wow, that's really interesting.
It doesn't even breathe fire.
If dinosaurs and reptiles did breathe fire you would just say how boring it is because that's the kind of homosexual you are
You're basically watching a bald emu chase American children around in a Jeep for six movies.
At least put Turok in it.
If turok was real you'd say that's boring too.
I mean, real life bull fighters are more interesting than fake dinosaurs in a movie.
A Turok adaptation would be bonkers
>cyborg dinos
>interdimensional threats
>robots
>giant insects and shit
Honestly would be awesome, toss in a hot brown girl with all the native mystic bs
wrong
dinosaurs will never not be interesting
don't talk shit about dinosaurs you monkey
>Dinosaurs aren't really that interesting
FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAG
NO MORE REMAKES
It wouldn't be a remake, it would be a proper adaptation.
NO. STOP. EVERYTHING IS A REBOOT OR A SEQUEL OR PREQUEL OR A REQUEL. I'M FRICKING SICK OF IT. STOP. NO.
SHOULD'VE BOUGHT A TICKET FOR RUBY GILLMAN BUCKO
I'M GOING TO SODOMIZE YOU
It would be a remake. More accurate one but still a remake because they already adapted it once.
Peak ESL zoomer hours
What a strange new obsession.
The general public isn't ready for Rocket Launchers vs Raptors, or Alan's egg fu
Not a remake but a show on they built the park with brutal workers death by raptors or else would be kino, there's a trend of analog horror style JP shorts and it really works well
Ok so you want a remake of JP in 2023? So what you want is:
>all black cast that can’t act
>non existent plot
>shitty writing
>effects worse than JP3
>badass women doing all the work
>multiple white man bad references
>several sequel shows that pick up where the non existent plot left off and don’t expand on anything but has some of the original actors in it as member berries
No thanks
Watch old westworld and realize he's doing lazy kojima callbacks at all your favorite parts of what you thought was an original book/film. Enjoy this comment, I spared no expense.
>Why don't they just remake Jurassic Park at this point?
Nedrys death was so gruesome in book
i really liked the camp cartoon
Wish James Cameron directed a Jurassic Park horror mini series.
What an embarrassing fricking thread. You are the reason cinema is dying. Dunno what I expected from a thread started with a bait image though.
Crichton book rankings
>God tier
Jurassic Park
Sphere
Andromeda Strain
Great Train Robbery
Timeline
>Great Tier
Congo
Prey
The Lost World
Eaters Of The Dead
>Good Tier
Next
Rising Sun
Airframe
Prey
>No Good Tier
Disclosure
State of Fear
Terminal Man
He also wrote the pilot episode of ER, wrote Twister, and wrote and directed WestWorld. The man was a kino machine
Westworld is so damn entertaining it's just incredible how talented Crichton was.
Why don't you have a nice day, wojakBlack person?
watch Jurassic Park 3 if you haven't already, its not as bad as most people say and definitely better than The Lost World
I wish But now is not the time. There are no stars atm just ESG puppets
Social media killed the movie star. The mystique that used to be cultivated through publicists, magazines, and studios is long gone, and everyone now realizes that they're all dumb as frick, and they're just pretty and/or charismatic people with connections.
Mother of God... it's so much worse than the movie and the final few chapters are terrible.
>he doesn't like the raptor nest kino
>he doesn't like hammond getting what he deserves
You have wrong opinions.
It's bad. Grant becoming a summer action thriller schlock hero assaulting Gennaro like a moron, all ending on a big dumb explosions and final scene of our main characters like something out of Goosebumps. "No, senor. You will never leave this place. The world must be protected from knowledge that big reptiles exist."
The movie is better than the book. One of the rare cases.
This would have probably been too cerebral but Jurassic Park sets up a good world for further tales of corporate espionage, bio terrorism and ethical quandaries. The world of Jurassic park is like the american version of Resident Evil, just Dinosaurs instead of Zombies. Jurassic Park "Sequels" should have forked into things like that and subtitled the entries as "from the World of Jurassic Park" or something.
The movie stripped out almost all of the startup capitalism critique, whitewashed Hammond's character (no longer a greedy butthole who was the source of everything going wrong, just an affable manchild who was a victim of nature itself) and made the whole thing squeeky clean for the American public.
I can guarantee that if Spielberg hadn't made the changes that he did, we wouldn't still be talking about JP today.
If Spielberg had blown up raptors with a rocket launcher, Jurassic Park wouldn't be a dead franchise today.
How many movies does it need to be a success to you? a dozen? two dozen?
Dinosaur have eternal universal appeal. There's no excuse for Jurassic Park failing to be a perennial franchise like James Bond or Godzilla.
There's not enough stories for that. It just ends up being the same thing repeated over and over ad nauseam in ever more stupid and contrived ways like #3 having to kidnap Grant to get him back on the island
They obviously wouldn't keep the same cast of characters in every movie. There are thousands of dinos vs humans movies you could make.
Lost World instantly becomes 200% better as soon as you headcanon the Owen Wilson character as a liar. He's not a moronic greenpeace dude who wants to rescue dinosaurs and gets dozens of people killed. He's a corporate spy sent to the island to either stop the competitors from getting their dinos or to slow them down and cause a scandal, while collecting DNA samples for his own company to make their own dinos with. All you need is for a reveal at the end when he's willing to sacrifice some people, probably the kid, to get a bag of DNA samples and then he gets eaten by raptors with Sarah turning her back on him in disgust.
>this book/movie is better if I ignore what is actually in it and imagine a better story
many such cases
The point is that it wouldn't take much imagination at all, you don't have to ignore anything in the movie, and it would instantly fit the corporate espionage world of the books. Just add one scene revealing his true allegiances and it fits perfectly.
I agree that your idea would make TLW better, but that's just not the TLW we actually got.
>Family friendly adaptation
Never read the book, but i remember quite a lot of deaths on the film version.
The movie is like the book except better. People just want to act sophisticated when they say "I want the same thing as before except with intestines spilling out."
what makes it better
I guess anon really hates the idea of dinosaurs getting blown up with rocket launchers and butthole corporate executives getting eaten by dinosaurs.
The sci fi thriller/action parts are much better done in the movie. Crichton had the ideas and came up with the themes but both himself (as the movie was co-written by him), Spielberg, Koepp and we could also add John Williams there too elevated the story. Anything that had to do with dinosaurs themselves while the themes remained the same. the only thing it lacked was gore if it's something people really care about. I think Carnosaurus had more of that if anyone's interested.
It's really like Jaws where the adaptation is just so efficient and gets rid of some of the mistakes. The characters in the movie are much better than in the book. Book Malcolm was insufferable. Absolutely couldn't stand this bastard.
>The sci fi thriller/action parts are much better done in the movie
I must have missed the parts of the movie where they blow up dinosaurs with a rocket launcher, can you provide a timestamp to this kino?
It's only in the fourth movie and it was whatever as everything else. I'm so glad this crap wasn't in the first one it would go so against the tone and aesthetic choices they were going for. No, the first movie didn't need fricking Vasquez shooting xenomorphs scene either.
>the movie did all the action stuff better than the book
>I'm glad the movie didn't blow up dinosaurs with rocket launchers!
so instead of admitting you never finished reading the book, you now pretend to be a homosexual who hates awesome things. Interesting approach you've taken to this conversation.
I've read the book do you have some kind of adhd that you find the idea of people reading so hard to believe? Honestly.
I find it impossible to believe anybody could read the book and say the movie had better action. It would take the worst kind of pansy homosexual to think blowing up dinosaurs with a rocket launcher isn't cool. I don't believe you are really so much of a homosexual as that. Rather, you didn't read the book, don't know what's in it, but boxed yourself into pretending you have.
Of course it had better action. It had fewer dinosaur scenes but if I want to watch those I can just watch the sequels. For its limited screentime I find great suspense in everything involving the raptors (who have a few good scenes in the book particularly Arnold's death but nothing on the level of the kitchen scene in the movie). Rex of course too. Maybe if there were no more sequels I'd say that the book offers greater variety like stampeted involving a herd of Hadrosaurus that would be more effective than Gallimimus in the movie but there was better contrast between both semi-religious majesty and danger.
I kinda liked how Wu died in the book. This is what should've happened to him in one of the movies.
>Book Malcolm was insufferable. Absolutely couldn't stand this bastard.
That's because he was Crichton's mouthpiece. It's why he suddenly started wining about global warming being a nothingburger while he's lying there dying, because Crichton had just started thinking it was bullshit and so had to preach his truth to the reader in the most annoying way possible.
>The sci fi thriller/action parts are much better done in the movie. Crichton had the ideas and came up with the themes but both himself (as the movie was co-written by him), Spielberg, Koepp and we could also add John Williams there too elevated the story
How so?
>Anything that had to do with dinosaurs themselves while the themes remained the same
They didn't really. The dinosaurs act and move in a completely different way.
>The characters in the movie are much better than in the book
How so?
>Malcolm was insufferable. Absolutely couldn't stand this bastard.
Doesn't make him a bad character
>The movie is like the book except better
You obviously haven't read the book.
I obviously have. Do you want entire episodes with characters talking about computers of science? Because those are the best chapters. Much more engaging than anything with dinosaurs but you won't adapt them fully into a visual medium. The movie carried as much as it was possible.
>I obviously have. Do you want entire episodes with characters talking about computers of science?
So you got filtered by some characters talking about "computers of science" and couldn't finish the book, got it.
Nobody who has actually read the book (in full, or it doesn't count) would say that the book and movie have the same plot.
You just don't get it do ya? The movie was better than the book. I haven't read TLW but I assume that no matter how different they are I'd still prefer the movie and a faithful adaptation of that wouldn't work.
>I haven't read TLW
We're not talking about TLW, which is shit (movie and book.) We're talking about Jurassic Park, which you haven't read.
I generally prefer movies. When I read a book I always think it's as good or better than the movie, but then weeks pass and I realize it was just okay.
You'd have to split Jurassic Park into 2 movies to properly adapt it and the end of part 1 is going to suck. There's no good ending to the first half.
I have. It was ok. The movie was better. The last act of the book kinda sucked though.
Family movies make too much bucks
This is why the jurrassic world movies were so light on death on screen compared to the 3 first movies. Dominion was even more into that child friendly theme
Universal knows R rated movies would make less money, therefore you can't make a jurassic park horror movie/game
>Tfw we will never have a horror jurassic game where you have to escape the island and crawl through the underground facilities of isla Sorna escaping raptors
dude, image a Far Cry: Primal type game but with an island of Dinos and modern weapons. that'd be cool.
tfw Turok is dead and forgotten
>Turok ded
>Tera Nova failed
>Dino Crisis unloved by CAPCOM
>90s Land of the Lost never ever on Blu-ray
>Dinotopia ded
>NuTrek Ruins the Gorn
Dino bros...it's oger
I always liked that Dinotopia picture
>>Tera Nova failed
I still wonder what were their plans for the next seasons
Ruins the Gorn
How?
They turned the Gorn into knock-off Xenomorphs...
You have pic related which is close enough
I loved Dino Crisis when I was a kid
Too bad so little games make dinosaurs spooky and not some moronic shit like Ark.
Wished they would remake it with REngine
They're hard to get right in a game, because they just kind of run at you.
Why's she so pissed?
long shooting day, constantly being rained on. You'd be surly too.
She just ate a Lawyer and he tasted bad
short arms
I have long said that Alien Isolation should have spawned a whole "Isolation" subseries, with Jurassic Park being one of them.
For real. Alien Isolation was scarier than any horror movie. They knocked it out of the park with that one
>a Jurassic Park game with the same level of devotion to the look and feel of the original source material as Alien Isolation
God, that would be so fricking cool
I've been saying that shit since Alien Isolation released.
Unfortunatly IGN and other game journos destroyed our hopes when they reviewed the game a 5/10 even though it's one of the best horror game in the last decade. If not the best.
The AI of the alien would have been perfect for a raptor, just reskin the xeno into a Spielberg raptor, change the spaceship facility into a jurassic park type of facility, add a few moments in the jungle where you face the T rex and you have an awesome game
I would spend hours hiding from the Raptors just so I could look at all the Jurassic Park equipment and facilities like I did with Alien. Would be amazing
only if the dinosaurs act like birds and not godzilla lol
I'm just waiting for Kyoryu so we can talk about some other dinosaur franchise for once.
>duuuude you can't just make a theme park with dinosaurs because science says they're supposed to be dead or something it's not allowed
Was he supposed to be a redditor?
His theory was "something will eventually frick up because it's like too complex to control"
Not exactly what he said but his main point was that having the technology to do something doesn't exactly make you qualified for said undertaking
Would Dinos have evolved into a humanoid form with manipulative digits like thumbs if the asteroid hadn't killed them all?
who says they didn't?
I liked the idea of space dinos but they way they explained it on voyager was giga-stupid.