as a kid I had a crush on leelee sobieski as joan and thought milla was too boyish looking. I will have to rewatch both now and see where my dick stands.
Actually, medieval armors are not only incredibly supple and resistant but also let the skin breathe much more than modern synthetic fabrics, reduce sweat and stop bacteria to grow!
It used to be pretty common to depict elves as having pointy/angular features.
Really it's just a v.modern (Netflix) take to just cast traditional Hollywood faces as elves. Like the people who suggest Henry Cavill to play Feanor, just awful casting by gamerbro zoomies who think an elf aesthetic is entirely made by ears+wig
Costumes cost money and resources. You can both save money and get a "I'm a green company" good boy points by recycling a trash can into elven "armor".
It's wild how different the quality between RoP and the first season of GoT is.
>Joan was actually just living out a huge wiener-block fantasy in which she actively wiener-blocked huge portions of the French army.
Peak female activity
Realistically though what's the point? The implication being that the armor has no context because not only could any average opponent just disarm somebody of this stature, you could just knock their ass into the dirt with comparative ease.
Rule of cool, I guess. Except the subject in question looks like an albino mongoloid with clown makeup.
She did have armor, and wore it, seeing as she was presented as a legitimate soldier. But realistically she was more or less of a rally point for the troops, and thus didn't do much moving in it. She got too close to a battle once and got hit with an arrow, but that's all the action she had.
>we know for a fact she was wounded more than once
And only by stray arrows, or the times she stepped on something like an idiot. Never in any kind of real combat situation.
4 months ago
Anonymous
yeah the fact that she was famous, specifically targeted by both the English and Burgundians and constantly putting herself in danger suggest no one actually targeted her and everything was just an accident
you have brain damage
4 months ago
Anonymous
She wasn't some kind of hero swimming moats and getting into swordfights, she was a glorified mascot.
4 months ago
Anonymous
and?
4 months ago
Anonymous
And cope and seethe, limey. No battle-hardened waifu for you.
4 months ago
Anonymous
you know "limey" is used to refer to the english right? the people she was fighting against?
and you're the only one bringing up waifu bullshit
4 months ago
Anonymous
>you know "limey" is used to refer to the english right?
Yeah, I figure since limeys have such raging hard-ons for their attackers and invaders, the same must apply here.
4 months ago
Anonymous
but the english were the ones attacking and invading
you are genuinely mentally challenged
4 months ago
Anonymous
>but the english were the ones attacking and invading
I was speaking in a rather contemporary setting, pity you didn't pick up on that.
4 months ago
Anonymous
you were trying to explain away misusing a word you didn't know the meaning of
4 months ago
Anonymous
>vid related
Brits really do have a thing for their enemies
4 months ago
Anonymous
She gave all attackers +5 on all rolls. Who cares that she didn't stab any crumpets personally.
4 months ago
Anonymous
>Gets hit with a arrow >Some homosexual hundreds of years in the future deems it to not be combat related
Where you there?
Realistically though what's the point? The implication being that the armor has no context because not only could any average opponent just disarm somebody of this stature, you could just knock their ass into the dirt with comparative ease.
Rule of cool, I guess. Except the subject in question looks like an albino mongoloid with clown makeup.
You claim to understand history but in reality you know nothing about it
A 90lb person in full plate is perfectly reasonable if she's going to "battle" in a horse and stand on a distance
Full plate on a women is the medieval equivalent of scientists behind a bullet-proof glass watching an explotion.
It's perfectly reasonable.
>Protag can't die and whips himself into shape after a montage of grisly deaths with the help of the firekeeper girlboss
So edge of tomorrow but in fantasy Europe.
Being the standard-bearer still meant being in the heat of battle to have your banner provide a rally point and morale booster. Like others said she was close enough for English to point her out and try and pick her off. I doubt anyone here has the courage to do what Joan did, and at 17!
>this thread isn't about joan of arc and this isn't supposed to be her
Right. It would be cool if an armor clad woman besides joan of arc was ever to be featured.
Nah, her squire that armored her confirmed she had nice sized breasts and was attractive enough to feel Catholic guilt about being attracted to a holy woman.
Stuff like this always reminds me of that one obscure manga about high school girls in a knights combat club, that unfortunately didn't run very long. I wish there was more stuff like that, too bad in the west it would be impossible to do without it being pozzed to hell and back.
She was a literal schitzo teenage girl that they used as a mascot. She wasn’t some military commander, she wasn’t a fighter, she wasn’t brave. She was a severely mentally ill child that they used to boost troop morale because they couldnt tell the difference between crazy and conduit to god. If someone did this today people would be horrified and cry war crime. But because women never do anything of importance pretty much ever feminists hold her up as something she’s not because they don’t have anything else.
She did give a significant moral boost to the depressed french side in the war, forcing the king to fight despite his fears and hesitations
She was later used as propaganda by the monarchy and the republic in the XIXrh century, there are huge chunks of french history when she was completly forgotten
By all accounts yes she did give a morale boost. But only because a) people were morons and b) she was used as such. All she did is run around like a crazy person, which she was. It’s like if the US plucked a crazed homeless junky from a mental ward, wrapped him in an American flag, and brought him along during the invasion of Iraq as their mascot. And there were videos of him getting drunk and shouting at goat frickers and the soldiers laughing and cheering. He wouldn’t be hailed as some hero, people would be like “what the frick is the US doing this is some sick shit”. But people in power convinced the soldiers the crazy chick had a Iine to god, and feminists really need literally anyone to look up to, so she’s seen as some hero. But again she was just a crazy kid who was used as a mascot. If she’s anything, she’s a victim.
>If she’s anything, she’s a victim.
you gays are so insufferable
one of the most famous female warriors of all time and you have to deconstruct her to a victim like an academic israelite
>Suggesting that famous female warriors were actually inventions of the media for morale purposes
Wow.
Crazy.
Nuts.
Imagine saying that.
Just unbelievable.
Woah.
Truly insufferable.
>She was a literal schitzo teenage girl that they used as a mascot. She wasn’t some military commander, she wasn’t a fighter, she wasn’t brave. She was a severely mentally ill child that they used to boost troop morale because they couldnt tell the difference between crazy and conduit to god. >If someone did this today people would be horrified and cry war crime.
We literally had Greta Thunberg less than 10 years ago
>Joan of Arc initiated an assault on the town walls, surviving a stone projectile that shattered against her helmet, knocking her to the ground. The English suffered heavy losses with the French executing those they took prisoner. >She always seemed to be present where the fighting was most intense, she frequently stayed with the front ranks, and she gave them a sense she was fighting for their salvation. Armagnac commanders would sometimes accept the advice she gave them, such as deciding what position to attack, when to continue an assault, and how to place artillery. >Joan of Arc was given the task of leading the assault to capture the city by Charles VII. Joan of Arc charged towards the main gate with the French army and tried to cross the city's water-filled moat in front of the gate. The French failed to capture any section of the gatehouse and its surrounding walls and suffered extremely heavy casualties. Joan of Arc was wounded by a crossbow bolt in the thigh. Joan was then dragged away from the battlefield and was brought back to her house in La Chapelle. Although she wished to resume the attack on Paris, Charles VII ordered her to withdraw to the Abbey of Saint-Denis.
just some examples
but she didnt do any fighting though
it's an explicitly fantasy inspired, decorative set - you would never see someone wear this to battle but equally it wouldn't look TOO out of place on a rich noble during a military procession
Visually and stylistically it's very obviously modern but considering it costs 4 grand and these types of things are only bought by larpers/HEMA types who all tend to be freaks about accuracy and historicity, it's probably decently functional and accurate in terms of the protection it actually offers.
Combination of: lack of medieval related shows/films; you commonly have poor costume design when it comes said period; any creatives that actually care about accuracy are going to take issue with female knights and the like (Joan of Arc is the only real exception); it is not a big enough fetish for them to tap into.
it's a much easier sell, especially in a fantasy setting, than 90lbs women beating up grown men, which you see in every action movie/show for the last 40 years
Yeah those are straight up ass. Its been a long time since I watched any media that was not ashamed to portray women as physically weaker. So maybe make them wizards, or sages instead of knights, or just combat nurses (if that's even a thing)
I know, but i cant find any infos on them. The cosplay/reactment shop doesnt name their models. But on social media someone suggetsed they are Ukrainian.
imagine a lady knight who is extremely adept in combat trying her hardest to court you but keeps messing up because she's clumsy in regards to romance...
Okay I got it. It's about a woman who is carrying the baby of the recently regicided king. She was fled away but now must return with the baby in her belly as THE FETAL KNIGHT.
soulless
soul
as a kid I had a crush on leelee sobieski as joan and thought milla was too boyish looking. I will have to rewatch both now and see where my dick stands.
how about getting a job? os some actual pussy?
too effort
ESL
great shot. She really portrays the hopeless despair turned apathy.
haha imagine how sweaty she gets after a couple hours of wearing that armor
>she
I think I've seen that chick doing cosplay stuff before. If that's a dude they did some pretty major surgery on his hips.
Actually, medieval armors are not only incredibly supple and resistant but also let the skin breathe much more than modern synthetic fabrics, reduce sweat and stop bacteria to grow!
Linen and wool undergarments may be better than poly bullshit, but her snatch is extremely fragrant I assure you.
It's probably hairy too. Gross
Now you got my full attention.
This, it smells like someone threw a vegana into the oven on the warm setting for 18 hours
>yeah this 40kg iron armor is so comfy bro
>totally not like a workout even walking somewhere
How many times are you going to make this thread?
What do you want to distract from now?
Degenerate
what? why?
Simps and orbiters should be rounded up and butchered, mexican cartel style
The only reason Joan of Arc is remembered at all is because of ancient simps, show some respect to these wankers as they carry on her legacy.
why do you keep bringing up joan of arc? why are you so obsessed with her?
OPEN YOUR FRICKING EYES AND CLOSE YOUR MOUTH
fricking hate when c**ts do this shit.
i like it
BECAUSE THAT bawd SHOULD PUT ON HER HELMET!!!
sorry
ya blew it
>Daughter of Yakub
Based
Praise our father Yakub for creating the white race
What a dickhead.
>pointy elbows
Do not want
Women look stupid when you remove their hair
4/10 pointy elbows
would not bang
She trained at the library
Why is she wearing a Somalian helmet?
I agree, where are the movies about elf knights adventuring?
We already reached peak femKnight elf so nobody else even bothers to try and compete
woke mary sue garbage
>mary sue
Sauron blocked her attack with one hand, then mind raped her as she pathetically asked him to s-stop
>raped her
Hot!
>just hee mind though
Awww.
oblivion ahh lookan' b***h
Where are the ears?
She looks like an actual rat
She looks more rat like than that guy in Harry Potter who was half rat
It used to be pretty common to depict elves as having pointy/angular features.
Really it's just a v.modern (Netflix) take to just cast traditional Hollywood faces as elves. Like the people who suggest Henry Cavill to play Feanor, just awful casting by gamerbro zoomies who think an elf aesthetic is entirely made by ears+wig
>go88lin cave
sounds like my kinda goblins
why were the rangz costumes so sovlless, were the costumes department all diversity hires too
Costumes cost money and resources. You can both save money and get a "I'm a green company" good boy points by recycling a trash can into elven "armor".
It's wild how different the quality between RoP and the first season of GoT is.
This makes me want Last House On The Left but set in a fantasy period.
>90lb person wearing plate armor
I guess it could work historically, seeing as she never did any real fighting except to chase prostitutes away from the soldiers.
>Joan was actually just living out a huge wiener-block fantasy in which she actively wiener-blocked huge portions of the French army.
Peak female activity
>deprive men of their duties
>consequently get raped to death by the enemy
hmmmmmm... coincidence?
Realistically though what's the point? The implication being that the armor has no context because not only could any average opponent just disarm somebody of this stature, you could just knock their ass into the dirt with comparative ease.
Rule of cool, I guess. Except the subject in question looks like an albino mongoloid with clown makeup.
She did have armor, and wore it, seeing as she was presented as a legitimate soldier. But realistically she was more or less of a rally point for the troops, and thus didn't do much moving in it. She got too close to a battle once and got hit with an arrow, but that's all the action she had.
we know for a fact she was wounded more than once
it's so weird how you keep lying and hoping no one calls you out on it
>we know for a fact she was wounded more than once
And only by stray arrows, or the times she stepped on something like an idiot. Never in any kind of real combat situation.
yeah the fact that she was famous, specifically targeted by both the English and Burgundians and constantly putting herself in danger suggest no one actually targeted her and everything was just an accident
you have brain damage
She wasn't some kind of hero swimming moats and getting into swordfights, she was a glorified mascot.
and?
And cope and seethe, limey. No battle-hardened waifu for you.
you know "limey" is used to refer to the english right? the people she was fighting against?
and you're the only one bringing up waifu bullshit
>you know "limey" is used to refer to the english right?
Yeah, I figure since limeys have such raging hard-ons for their attackers and invaders, the same must apply here.
but the english were the ones attacking and invading
you are genuinely mentally challenged
>but the english were the ones attacking and invading
I was speaking in a rather contemporary setting, pity you didn't pick up on that.
you were trying to explain away misusing a word you didn't know the meaning of
>vid related
Brits really do have a thing for their enemies
She gave all attackers +5 on all rolls. Who cares that she didn't stab any crumpets personally.
>Gets hit with a arrow
>Some homosexual hundreds of years in the future deems it to not be combat related
Where you there?
A full suit of 16 century plate was about 25 kilos.
You claim to understand history but in reality you know nothing about it
A 90lb person in full plate is perfectly reasonable if she's going to "battle" in a horse and stand on a distance
Full plate on a women is the medieval equivalent of scientists behind a bullet-proof glass watching an explotion.
It's perfectly reasonable.
Because europeans stopped making good movies
I really really want a HBO dark souls tv-series
>I really really want softcore dark souls porn
>firekeeper gets blacked
>sorry chosen undead but your hollowed peter doesn't do it for me
I would kill myself if reality got that bad
I might actually watch softcore beef-jerky porn.
I think I've seen my share of black people in European medieval armor already, tyvm
I dont , I no longer wish for any of my favorite IP's to be turned into film.
>Monkey Paw finger curls
>Protag can't die and whips himself into shape after a montage of grisly deaths with the help of the firekeeper girlboss
So edge of tomorrow but in fantasy Europe.
>600 years later
>bongs are still seething over a schitzo farm girl
nigel will never live down losing a war to a teenage peasant girl
I think it's just fetishists who are let down when they discover she wasn't a heckin' based tomboy action girl.
Being the standard-bearer still meant being in the heat of battle to have your banner provide a rally point and morale booster. Like others said she was close enough for English to point her out and try and pick her off. I doubt anyone here has the courage to do what Joan did, and at 17!
too white
how white is too white?
any white is too white
Right
God...frick...that resting b***h face man.
Thats no resting face, thats a AYO-face!
>pink pussy and butthole covered by blonde pubes wrapped in steel plates
I’m turning rabid rrrhehfeggrgrge
Joan was dark-haired and plain looking
its amazing how wrong you continue to be
that's cool but this thread isn't about joan of arc and this isn't supposed to be her
>this thread isn't about joan of arc and this isn't supposed to be her
Right. It would be cool if an armor clad woman besides joan of arc was ever to be featured.
yeah it would be which is the entire point of the question I posed in the original post
Nah, her squire that armored her confirmed she had nice sized breasts and was attractive enough to feel Catholic guilt about being attracted to a holy woman.
the other chick is hotter
hmm
nah
my bad, other chicks
Why is the one on the right looking at me like I'm scum?
rbf
Is that a bad thing?
YOU KNOW WHY
Stuff like this always reminds me of that one obscure manga about high school girls in a knights combat club, that unfortunately didn't run very long. I wish there was more stuff like that, too bad in the west it would be impossible to do without it being pozzed to hell and back.
Because she is the queen?
>right
Is she on Xanax ?
no, she's on a quest
>long hair in armor
>every movement of the head results in hair being pulled out of the scalp cause it got caught in joints or on rivets
sounds fun, put a cap on ya dunces
Imagine raping her.
Cool it with the rape remarks dude, not okay.
I'll rape you after I'm done with her.
Oh yeah, you want a rape off? I'll sick the warlocks on you AND the witches.
I'm gonna frick you till you love me homosexual
you couldn't if you tried
Yeah, too many layers
HNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGNGNGNAGHHHHHHHHH
She was a literal schitzo teenage girl that they used as a mascot. She wasn’t some military commander, she wasn’t a fighter, she wasn’t brave. She was a severely mentally ill child that they used to boost troop morale because they couldnt tell the difference between crazy and conduit to god. If someone did this today people would be horrified and cry war crime. But because women never do anything of importance pretty much ever feminists hold her up as something she’s not because they don’t have anything else.
She did give a significant moral boost to the depressed french side in the war, forcing the king to fight despite his fears and hesitations
She was later used as propaganda by the monarchy and the republic in the XIXrh century, there are huge chunks of french history when she was completly forgotten
By all accounts yes she did give a morale boost. But only because a) people were morons and b) she was used as such. All she did is run around like a crazy person, which she was. It’s like if the US plucked a crazed homeless junky from a mental ward, wrapped him in an American flag, and brought him along during the invasion of Iraq as their mascot. And there were videos of him getting drunk and shouting at goat frickers and the soldiers laughing and cheering. He wouldn’t be hailed as some hero, people would be like “what the frick is the US doing this is some sick shit”. But people in power convinced the soldiers the crazy chick had a Iine to god, and feminists really need literally anyone to look up to, so she’s seen as some hero. But again she was just a crazy kid who was used as a mascot. If she’s anything, she’s a victim.
tl;dr
you keep talking about feminists but feminists don't care about a devout Catholic nationalist
>If she’s anything, she’s a victim.
you gays are so insufferable
one of the most famous female warriors of all time and you have to deconstruct her to a victim like an academic israelite
>Suggesting that famous female warriors were actually inventions of the media for morale purposes
Wow.
Crazy.
Nuts.
Imagine saying that.
Just unbelievable.
Woah.
Truly insufferable.
Yeah, yeah, we get it. England #1. Britannia rules the waves. The priests that tried her definitely aren't burning in hell right now.
>The Priests that tried her
>Bishop Pierre Cauchon
>Pierre Cauchon
>Pierre
>Cauchon
I know - damn English, amirite!
He was on the English side of the war you fricking moron.
>She was a literal schitzo teenage girl that they used as a mascot. She wasn’t some military commander, she wasn’t a fighter, she wasn’t brave. She was a severely mentally ill child that they used to boost troop morale because they couldnt tell the difference between crazy and conduit to god.
>If someone did this today people would be horrified and cry war crime.
We literally had Greta Thunberg less than 10 years ago
...And which battles did she lead people into again?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Siege_of_Orléans
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_Jargeau
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_Meung-sur-Loire
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_Beaugency_(1429)
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Siege_of_Saint-Pierre-le-Moûtier
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Siege_of_Paris_(1429)
among others
>Joan of Arc initiated an assault on the town walls, surviving a stone projectile that shattered against her helmet, knocking her to the ground. The English suffered heavy losses with the French executing those they took prisoner.
>She always seemed to be present where the fighting was most intense, she frequently stayed with the front ranks, and she gave them a sense she was fighting for their salvation. Armagnac commanders would sometimes accept the advice she gave them, such as deciding what position to attack, when to continue an assault, and how to place artillery.
>Joan of Arc was given the task of leading the assault to capture the city by Charles VII. Joan of Arc charged towards the main gate with the French army and tried to cross the city's water-filled moat in front of the gate. The French failed to capture any section of the gatehouse and its surrounding walls and suffered extremely heavy casualties. Joan of Arc was wounded by a crossbow bolt in the thigh. Joan was then dragged away from the battlefield and was brought back to her house in La Chapelle. Although she wished to resume the attack on Paris, Charles VII ordered her to withdraw to the Abbey of Saint-Denis.
just some examples
but she didnt do any fighting though
Good thing these histories magically ink themselves onto the paper and aren't put there by people with an agenda.
>NOOOO ITS NOT TRUE BECAUSE... BECAUSE... IT JUST ISNT OK???
they don't want me to be horny for some reason
made for Big Black Knight wiener
To answer your question, not loose and cheap enough!
Watch Stockholm Bloodbath.
wtc knight gf?
Because the industry does not cater to your particular non-widespread fetish.
but it should
you JUST know she exclusively fricks black knights
No, only Claymore Knights!
>high heels
phillistine-tier
As long as it is fantasy, it is ok. But high-heels were common or invented in the medievil times to avoid the manure in the streets!
>Claymore Knights!
Ophelia was best girl
This looks a LOT worse in motion than I thought it would from the photos
Yeah no wonder this isn’t more of a thing
she's just not used to wearing it
Normie women completely mock Hollywood.
>normie
She murdered as part of a cult ritual.
How accurate - it being a woman notwithstanding - is this armor?
there's titty plates so not
it's an explicitly fantasy inspired, decorative set - you would never see someone wear this to battle but equally it wouldn't look TOO out of place on a rich noble during a military procession
Visually and stylistically it's very obviously modern but considering it costs 4 grand and these types of things are only bought by larpers/HEMA types who all tend to be freaks about accuracy and historicity, it's probably decently functional and accurate in terms of the protection it actually offers.
pillars of the earth
Thats the actress from Scott Pilgrim?
yes, alison pill
Thanks, didnt looked that up. I just trusted my feeling and memories.
Combination of: lack of medieval related shows/films; you commonly have poor costume design when it comes said period; any creatives that actually care about accuracy are going to take issue with female knights and the like (Joan of Arc is the only real exception); it is not a big enough fetish for them to tap into.
I find it hard to suspend my disbelief when it comes to women in warfare. Female knights can look interesting but it's just a tough sell. /blog
it's a much easier sell, especially in a fantasy setting, than 90lbs women beating up grown men, which you see in every action movie/show for the last 40 years
Yeah those are straight up ass. Its been a long time since I watched any media that was not ashamed to portray women as physically weaker. So maybe make them wizards, or sages instead of knights, or just combat nurses (if that's even a thing)
She looks sleepy.
Because she is high on metal polish fumes!
what's the girl's name?
Armstreet model. They are twins btw.
>armstreet model
what a weird name
I know, but i cant find any infos on them. The cosplay/reactment shop doesnt name their models. But on social media someone suggetsed they are Ukrainian.
I give you 5000 rubles and 10 kalashnikovs for them
>Armstreet
>Headquarter Milwaukee
Sorry, you need to trade something like Himars or above!
only true mithril will do
But is it flexible enough?
Joan of Arc movie when?
>no helmet
>no sabbatons
low test and possibly homosexual
what is that penis-shaped thing under her chair?
that's not important
>Why don't we see more characters like this in television and film?
Judging by her eyes, it's because there's not that much weed in the whole world.
this is now a Leelee Sobieski thread
sex with sweaty medieval girls
imagine a lady knight who is extremely adept in combat trying her hardest to court you but keeps messing up because she's clumsy in regards to romance...
Because it's an endangered phenotype.
Anyone seen Clopi? I think it is peasants in English. The main character is gorgeus.
Also, remember the Anglos seeth over blond youth, remember the racist comment against Polish kids in the Guardian.
It is Chłopi, homosexual.
steel pusy
the audience can only suspend their disbelief so much
Will AI save the genre?
Okay I got it. It's about a woman who is carrying the baby of the recently regicided king. She was fled away but now must return with the baby in her belly as THE FETAL KNIGHT.
I'd watch it
kek
to give me a boner
>the fetal knight
Sounds like a Soulsborne enemy.
~~*modern writers*~~ and ~~*producers*~~ ~~*etc*~~ don't like hot white people and women anymore.
cause one claymore swing you cut that moron and her sword in half
I'm caught between my fatigue of this fantasy where we are supposed to pretend women are physicaly capable and my fetish for hot women in armor.
because men don't want to see women like that (unless it's porn) and women don't want to be badass knights
>because men don't want to see women like that (unless it's porn)
wrong
you're not a man
I just want to see knight girls get beaten the frick up. Anyone know some good Cinemaphile like that?
take your meds
What do you mean, I just want to know if there’s any ryona knight kino