he's always been a douche to Jeremy and vice versa
He was a douche to the regenerative farming guys because they had a questionable idea and it turned out not working at all
In theory but how are you going to quantify it? In practice some big city hipster came to his workplace, told him how to do his job, fricked it up and made unsubtantiated claims of how its better now, thrust me bro. I'd be mad too.
As a matter of fact I did, but I never saw his schlong. Between the love handles and the fact that he had a such massive bush seeing it was literally impossible.
I figured it was just a schtick he was playing up for the show since his bangtz always came off as sort of artificial like everything Clarksons put out in recent years.
>so I’ll try explaining this again, right >we collect the cow poop >and spread it on the soil >this makes the soil fertile so we can grow food >the cow poop is not the food
In this country we dont eat cow poo, yeah
we use cow poo to fertilize land >but saar, cow dung very healthy
listen, listen rajesh, poo is for land its not a food for me and you, yeah >but saar please, I need to drink cow piss
oh you nasty bastard
Even "real" documentaries have scripted moments and editing and framing tricks to get their intended message across.
This is still a documentary series.
Lmao actually thinking that.
In S1 and 2 he's calling Clarkson an idiot constantly.
In S3 they're actually much friendlier with another. Plus he was right about Groove Armada.
Yes, do you understand the client/vendor relationship? Jeremy PAYS him for his services and Amazon pays both of them.
>take guitar lessons >I am their client >they refuse to teach me how to play guitar >and just spend every lesson playing guitar and forcing me to watch while calling me a moron >I am their client
Clarkson isn't paying Kaleb to teach him how to farm. Kaleb is a contractor, paid to WORK the farm. Big difference.
In your analogy you'd pay for a guy to play the guitar for you. While calling you a moron because you can't play the guitar yourself. While also ruining the guitar he's supposed to play on.
I fully understand Clarksons faffing about with side projects, but this one was a misfire. I dont give a shit about pigs, there was no real conflict this season except muh economy which isnt even a real issue, all the interesting additions like the burger van was glossed over, Kaleb doing all the real farming on his own just showed that he isnt a leading man both as a farmer and as a tv personality. Charlie seemed tired as well. Lisa was unironically the best part this season simply because of how much of a handwringing untrustworthy irish c**t she is.
Still a worthwhile show
The restaurant arc only existed so the show would get advertised in the Daily Mail when it inevitably got shut down. At least they didn't spend half of this season moaning about the council that he deliberately antagonises like S2.
1.) They are told to play things up for the show
2.) He is actually a farmer hick. Some of them are just dickheads, they're just people like anyone else.
3.) He has an ego because he knows Jeremy can't do shit without people like him. Rather than recognize this and try to teach he just ribs him and acts like a c**t because he figures Jeremy isn't doing this for anything but money.
4.) I think he's genuinely a bit of a c**t IRL, he drives a swaggot Nissan 370z slammed and limo tinted so you can assume he has douche tendencies.
>Taking time to teach your employer/client what, how and why you are doing something so that they can then frick you off in future now that they can do what they used to be paying you to do
Yes, do you understand the client/vendor relationship? Jeremy PAYS him for his services and Amazon pays both of them.
>take guitar lessons >I am their client >they refuse to teach me how to play guitar >and just spend every lesson playing guitar and forcing me to watch while calling me a moron >I am their client
1.) They are told to play things up for the show
2.) He is actually a farmer hick. Some of them are just dickheads, they're just people like anyone else.
3.) He has an ego because he knows Jeremy can't do shit without people like him. Rather than recognize this and try to teach he just ribs him and acts like a c**t because he figures Jeremy isn't doing this for anything but money.
4.) I think he's genuinely a bit of a c**t IRL, he drives a swaggot Nissan 370z slammed and limo tinted so you can assume he has douche tendencies.
Jeremy is blatantly fricking up on purpose. Anybody with a bare minimum of countryside experience can see that.
Jeremy is constantly shown fricking up basic shit that he has already been taught before. What other reaction is Kaleb supposed to have?
"Oh don't worry Jeremy, you'll get it right next time! I believe in you!". Sounds like a riveting watch.
This is just normal banter between them, you must be extremely thin skinned in real life. Im guessing you are american
Literally no one will give a frick about him once the show disappears. He needs to milk this thing for all it's worth.
With that being said, the UK has a weird ability to prop up and maintain tons of pseudo-celebrities if they get in with the BBC. Can't see that happening for him though, he's consorted with Jeremy Clarkson who is literally Hitler in the eyes of the dear old beeb.
He has Karl Pilkington like outsider potential to hang around for a fair while.
Doesn't mean he'll do it, he probably just wants to work on the farms long term.
Not a chance, Karl was genuinely a really funny guy and came out with really absurd shit that made him memorable. Kaleb is just a grumpy farmer who swears at Jeremy in a country accent.
Yeah it's not the exact same kind of appeal obviously, Karl was just the only other outsider I could think of who went mainstream in the U.K.
I agree I don't see as much potential as Karl, but I wouldn't be surprised if he hang around on tv for a while, maybe get a spinoff or do celeb reality tv shit.
Karl Pilkington is possibly one of the least funny people to ever exist in the universe. He's like a British LOL SO RANDUM XD attempt at shit tier humor a la Tim and Eric.
>look guys he doesn't understand synonyms >LOL LET'S RIDE THIS BIT FOR 40 MINUTES LOL HE DUMB LOL
LOLOLOLOLOLOL OMG GOOD ONE M8 THAT'S CRAZY M8 LIKE OMG HE WOULD BE LIKE DIS AIN'T FISHES DIS BE LOIKE SWEET INNIT ME SHARK TEEF IS ALL STICKY NOW INNIT LOLOLOLOLOL
I’d watch 8-10 episodes of Kaleb bumbling around on his own farm with his own crew. Would be nice to see how a real English farm operates without a millionaire removing the fear of failure and a bunch of crazy schemes.
Kaleb just needs make enough to buy a big farm in the Cotswolds then he is made for life and can happily slide back into anonymity. Thats what 5-10 million.
British "Hollywood" is basically just a forced meme club. The government run BBC decides who will be famous and who will push their socialist agendas. Anyone who doesn't follow in line (i.e. Jeremy Clarkson) gets shafted and thrown out of the club, regardless of how many years they've worked it.
The entire thing is an Orwellian propaganda machine.
>dipshit personality has opinions on garbage
Well, if it worked for Karl Pilington and the absolute dregs of society who think he's funny or entertaining, then why not for farmerboy here.
They're all c**ts. Jeremy is a c**t, Charlie is a passive agressive c**t, Kaleb is a c**t, all of the locals complaining about the farm are c**ts themselves. The english are just a bunch of spineless and cowardly pricks. They won't do shit but complain. English and England have been the dying man of Europe for 100 years now.
His country is in shambles, his government wants to kill all white people and especially farmers so why would he not be a twat?
Also Clarkson (or the israeli producers) idea of having a competition of who can make the most money over a season while having c**ts like that washed up rock start messing about with his fields is a recipe for a fuming farmer.
>Redditors have a meltdown realising that the people producing their food are all rather conservative.
Hence why our redditor occupied governments have a huge anti-farmer agenda, the kulaks must be crushed.
I come from the same town as Charlie. It is well known locally that he is a bit of a gay boy. In fact he used to be known as 'Suck of the Irish' because he was known to give blowjobs to local farmers. He got into agronomy etc to meet men, hence why he is always happier when Kaleb, a strapping young farmer, is around. I bet he's sucked Kaleb off at least once in the barn behind the Lambo tractor.
Nothing against him he was always a nice guy. But a real, flaming, collects scrap metal, shops at morrisons because their delivery drivers walk through the shop and he can touch their muscles bender. Surprised it hasn't come up in the show. He probably would touch up Alan the builder, Alan seems like he'd batter Charlie for that so they aren't in many scenes together.
My dad bought me Kalebs book for Christmas and made us go to his book tour as well. My dad asked if kaleb "could get my son a job in farming"then added "he only has a cartoon hoe on his bedroom wall but it gives him strong wrists". Kaleb laughed. Prick
People who b***h about Kaleb have obviously never worked manual labour before. Arguments and getting angry at each other is part and parcel of the job. The best of friends could curse and spit at each other for the whole day but they'll still buy each other a round in the pub after work. You don't take it personal. Its just part of the job.
How the frick does this guy keep getting elected when everything he's supposed to be responsible for in London keeps getting worse and worse
Is it really as simple as brownoids seeing a brownoid and voting for him because he is brown
>be me >made a bunch of money as a SWE when my company went public >bought a farm >can't stand my farmer neighbors because they aren't 160 IQ polymath geniuses like me >can't stand other 160 IQ geniuses because they couldn't do 5 minutes of manual labor
I understand Clarkson's and Daft Punk guy or whoever the frick's plight.
He hates richgays who want to LARP as farmers. Can you blame him?
>He hates richgays who want to LARP as farmers
So...Clarkson?
That's the point that anon was making.
Glad you understood that.
tldr
first day?
did some drama happen?
he's always been a douche to Jeremy and vice versa
He was a douche to the regenerative farming guys because they had a questionable idea and it turned out not working at all
>turned out not working at all
Did they release the new episodes?
Didn't it regenerate the soil?
In theory but how are you going to quantify it? In practice some big city hipster came to his workplace, told him how to do his job, fricked it up and made unsubtantiated claims of how its better now, thrust me bro. I'd be mad too.
>In theory but how are you going to quantify it?
Measuring crop yield season to season?
>t. Monsanto sales rep
Farmers are jerks. And you saw how useless he was in the city.
To be fair, that city looks fricking moronic to get around in.
day 1
>Y are you even a farmer you dont know anytin
>day 50
>your so bad i don't understand how anybody can be this bad
>day 200
>Well your not as good as me ...
dudes actually a complete dick but its kind of funny and hes probably just a deluded dick not an actively nasty one
Pretty sure they just tell him to up the banter to make the show more entertaining
Source: revealed to me in a dream
I went to highschool with him. He was a bully and a fatso.
Did you ever see him nude in the locker room?
As a matter of fact I did, but I never saw his schlong. Between the love handles and the fact that he had a such massive bush seeing it was literally impossible.
and now he is hobnobing with celebrities and the pm and you are fat and bullying him on Cinemaphile... ironic.
I figured it was just a schtick he was playing up for the show since his bangtz always came off as sort of artificial like everything Clarksons put out in recent years.
>so I’ll try explaining this again, right
>we collect the cow poop
>and spread it on the soil
>this makes the soil fertile so we can grow food
>the cow poop is not the food
>okay thank you kaleb sir, so i eat the poop now yes?
such a tiny lad
>this is your prime minister
Honestly how do bongs cope with being a living joke nowadays?
booze
we have a sense of humour
In there defense, he was never elected.
The funniest thing is he wasn't even voted in by the people, it was a small cohort of the very crustiest tories
In this country we dont eat cow poo, yeah
we use cow poo to fertilize land
>but saar, cow dung very healthy
listen, listen rajesh, poo is for land its not a food for me and you, yeah
>but saar please, I need to drink cow piss
oh you nasty bastard
HE'S SO TINY! HOW CAN YOU BE THAT SMALL AND LEAD A COUNTRY!?
Who's that poojeet on the right?
Bidet called him "Rashee Sanook"
Kek
the writers have decided to rework his characterization to add more drama. reality TV has writers, you know.
It’s a documentary
No, it's "reality" TV
moron
Even "real" documentaries have scripted moments and editing and framing tricks to get their intended message across.
This is still a documentary series.
>writers
bong telly can't afford these, it's just crew shouting suggestions at the twunts in front of the camera.
Its Amazon that makes it. Americans need scripts for eating breakfast ffs
Nah, amazon just pay for it. The production companies are both bong, all the crew are bongistanis
It has that signature artificial feel to it that has been present since late top gear.
Lmao actually thinking that.
In S1 and 2 he's calling Clarkson an idiot constantly.
In S3 they're actually much friendlier with another. Plus he was right about Groove Armada.
Clarkson isn't paying Kaleb to teach him how to farm. Kaleb is a contractor, paid to WORK the farm. Big difference.
In your analogy you'd pay for a guy to play the guitar for you. While calling you a moron because you can't play the guitar yourself. While also ruining the guitar he's supposed to play on.
I fully understand Clarksons faffing about with side projects, but this one was a misfire. I dont give a shit about pigs, there was no real conflict this season except muh economy which isnt even a real issue, all the interesting additions like the burger van was glossed over, Kaleb doing all the real farming on his own just showed that he isnt a leading man both as a farmer and as a tv personality. Charlie seemed tired as well. Lisa was unironically the best part this season simply because of how much of a handwringing untrustworthy irish c**t she is.
Still a worthwhile show
i like Lisa
everyone is tired because this show has overstayed its welcome by 3 seasons now
season 1 was fun but they shouldve NEVER made anything past that
i prefer series 3 to series 1
Pigs is much better than the restaurant arc. At least this is actual farming.
The restaurant arc only existed so the show would get advertised in the Daily Mail when it inevitably got shut down. At least they didn't spend half of this season moaning about the council that he deliberately antagonises like S2.
I'm guessing he deliberately antagonizes them because they act like petty despotic tyrants.
Nice digits. The bots that responded didn't notice.
he's a borderline moron but a damn good farmer
1.) They are told to play things up for the show
2.) He is actually a farmer hick. Some of them are just dickheads, they're just people like anyone else.
3.) He has an ego because he knows Jeremy can't do shit without people like him. Rather than recognize this and try to teach he just ribs him and acts like a c**t because he figures Jeremy isn't doing this for anything but money.
4.) I think he's genuinely a bit of a c**t IRL, he drives a swaggot Nissan 370z slammed and limo tinted so you can assume he has douche tendencies.
>Rather than recognize this and try to teach
>Taking time to teach your employer/client what, how and why you are doing something so that they can then frick you off in future now that they can do what they used to be paying you to do
.......
Caleb has his own working farm you clod, he's doing the show as a bit of extra cash. That's why Charlie has always been there as a primary planner.
Jeremy is his client. Smarten up quick or YNGMI
Yes, do you understand the client/vendor relationship? Jeremy PAYS him for his services and Amazon pays both of them.
>take guitar lessons
>I am their client
>they refuse to teach me how to play guitar
>and just spend every lesson playing guitar and forcing me to watch while calling me a moron
>I am their client
Jeremy is blatantly fricking up on purpose. Anybody with a bare minimum of countryside experience can see that.
Jeremy is constantly shown fricking up basic shit that he has already been taught before. What other reaction is Kaleb supposed to have?
"Oh don't worry Jeremy, you'll get it right next time! I believe in you!". Sounds like a riveting watch.
This is just normal banter between them, you must be extremely thin skinned in real life. Im guessing you are american
wow you seem pretty triggered, maybe take some time out in your safe space there little snowflake
I need more British kino please
this is the only decent thing I've been able to get my gma to watch with me because she likes making fun of the accents
Sirens (2011), heavily underappreciated. You might need subs tho.
Fame has probably gotten to his head.
Literally no one will give a frick about him once the show disappears. He needs to milk this thing for all it's worth.
With that being said, the UK has a weird ability to prop up and maintain tons of pseudo-celebrities if they get in with the BBC. Can't see that happening for him though, he's consorted with Jeremy Clarkson who is literally Hitler in the eyes of the dear old beeb.
He has Karl Pilkington like outsider potential to hang around for a fair while.
Doesn't mean he'll do it, he probably just wants to work on the farms long term.
Not a chance, Karl was genuinely a really funny guy and came out with really absurd shit that made him memorable. Kaleb is just a grumpy farmer who swears at Jeremy in a country accent.
Yeah it's not the exact same kind of appeal obviously, Karl was just the only other outsider I could think of who went mainstream in the U.K.
I agree I don't see as much potential as Karl, but I wouldn't be surprised if he hang around on tv for a while, maybe get a spinoff or do celeb reality tv shit.
karl is not a outsider, he was both ricky gervais, steve merchant and even jimmy carrs producer on xfm. hardly just some random bloke
Karl Pilkington is possibly one of the least funny people to ever exist in the universe. He's like a British LOL SO RANDUM XD attempt at shit tier humor a la Tim and Eric.
>look guys he doesn't understand synonyms
>LOL LET'S RIDE THIS BIT FOR 40 MINUTES LOL HE DUMB LOL
>Wot if you like fed jam and custard to a shark
LOLOLOLOLOLOL OMG GOOD ONE M8 THAT'S CRAZY M8 LIKE OMG HE WOULD BE LIKE DIS AIN'T FISHES DIS BE LOIKE SWEET INNIT ME SHARK TEEF IS ALL STICKY NOW INNIT LOLOLOLOLOL
I’d watch 8-10 episodes of Kaleb bumbling around on his own farm with his own crew. Would be nice to see how a real English farm operates without a millionaire removing the fear of failure and a bunch of crazy schemes.
He farms the Cotswolds, its full of hobby 'farming' millionaires' rural retreats
cos it's inheritance tax free
Kaleb just needs make enough to buy a big farm in the Cotswolds then he is made for life and can happily slide back into anonymity. Thats what 5-10 million.
its so fricking weird how many "celebrities" there is on British telly
British "Hollywood" is basically just a forced meme club. The government run BBC decides who will be famous and who will push their socialist agendas. Anyone who doesn't follow in line (i.e. Jeremy Clarkson) gets shafted and thrown out of the club, regardless of how many years they've worked it.
The entire thing is an Orwellian propaganda machine.
>who will push their socialist agendas
BBC is against the working class, lel.
I would like a real farming show with an enjoyable host like Kaleb and none of that posh c**t bullshit that Clarkson is doing
>a real farming show
countryfile is still on innit lah
c**tryfile is for shitlib urbanites
"This Farming Life" is real farmers though.
Like father like son
Gotta strike while the iron's hot. He probably sat down for 6 hours with a ghost writer.
>dipshit personality has opinions on garbage
Well, if it worked for Karl Pilington and the absolute dregs of society who think he's funny or entertaining, then why not for farmerboy here.
Got too big for his briches.
They're all c**ts. Jeremy is a c**t, Charlie is a passive agressive c**t, Kaleb is a c**t, all of the locals complaining about the farm are c**ts themselves. The english are just a bunch of spineless and cowardly pricks. They won't do shit but complain. English and England have been the dying man of Europe for 100 years now.
And you are a c**t.
Aye. True.
They are southerners
Northerners have a more charming and direct c**tishness
Anglos truly are the Black folk of europe.
>now
Always was, it was just novel at first. He hasn't got anything else in the tank, on account of being a dumbass
ive heard he has been approached for the next round of im a celebrity
His country is in shambles, his government wants to kill all white people and especially farmers so why would he not be a twat?
Also Clarkson (or the israeli producers) idea of having a competition of who can make the most money over a season while having c**ts like that washed up rock start messing about with his fields is a recipe for a fuming farmer.
t. grew up in a tiny farming village
i thought that bloke made dance music in the 90s
Is he? Seems like they had more heartwarming scenes with Jeremy than ever before.
I love how after each season, Redditors have a meltdown realising that the people producing their food are all rather conservative.
Turns out having a real job that is hard work every day, makes you think about actual problems, and not shit like pronouns.
>Redditors have a meltdown realising that the people producing their food are all rather conservative.
Hence why our redditor occupied governments have a huge anti-farmer agenda, the kulaks must be crushed.
I come from the same town as Charlie. It is well known locally that he is a bit of a gay boy. In fact he used to be known as 'Suck of the Irish' because he was known to give blowjobs to local farmers. He got into agronomy etc to meet men, hence why he is always happier when Kaleb, a strapping young farmer, is around. I bet he's sucked Kaleb off at least once in the barn behind the Lambo tractor.
Nothing against him he was always a nice guy. But a real, flaming, collects scrap metal, shops at morrisons because their delivery drivers walk through the shop and he can touch their muscles bender. Surprised it hasn't come up in the show. He probably would touch up Alan the builder, Alan seems like he'd batter Charlie for that so they aren't in many scenes together.
>collects scrap metal
Is this a particularly gay hobby?
yes all scrap men are massive benders
Wow great fiction, reddit.
imagine thinking characters on a TV show are real
My dad bought me Kalebs book for Christmas and made us go to his book tour as well. My dad asked if kaleb "could get my son a job in farming"then added "he only has a cartoon hoe on his bedroom wall but it gives him strong wrists". Kaleb laughed. Prick
your da mugged you right off right in frontt of big K
Season 1 when?
>boomers try not to deliberately humiliate their offspring challenge impossible
He's done you
show is excellent you dont need plot, just day to day shit like seeing a new batch of pigs or sausages is super comfy
People who b***h about Kaleb have obviously never worked manual labour before. Arguments and getting angry at each other is part and parcel of the job. The best of friends could curse and spit at each other for the whole day but they'll still buy each other a round in the pub after work. You don't take it personal. Its just part of the job.
Sounds toxic as frick
Saying toxic is unironically the most low t shit ever
PART AND PARCEL INNIT
How the frick does this guy keep getting elected when everything he's supposed to be responsible for in London keeps getting worse and worse
Is it really as simple as brownoids seeing a brownoid and voting for him because he is brown
>Is it really as simple as brownoids seeing a brownoid and voting for him because he is brown
yes, plus cucks with white guilt voting for him.
this is the conversation i had with my gf as well. Congrats Cinemaphile you're officially woman-brained.
The WHAT gamble?
There's a town in Canada called Sexsmith where they grow canola and oil.
Town slogan: Sexsmith, land of rape and money.
he let her live after, it's a risk
>be me
>made a bunch of money as a SWE when my company went public
>bought a farm
>can't stand my farmer neighbors because they aren't 160 IQ polymath geniuses like me
>can't stand other 160 IQ geniuses because they couldn't do 5 minutes of manual labor
I understand Clarkson's and Daft Punk guy or whoever the frick's plight.
>claims to have high IQ
>drives a Dodge
lol shut the frick up you are a literal moron
This is the only genuinely likable person on the show
No idea what he is saying.
>gets made farm manager
>immediately fires Jeremy
I laughed.