Why would you NOT join Davy Jones' crew? "Why yes, I do want to blink out of existence instead of be an immortal pirate."
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Why would you NOT join Davy Jones' crew?
I'd spend hundreds of years on the Dutchman but I wouldn't want forever. If you blink out of existence it won't make a difference anyway.
You will not be sad. You will not be angry. You won't be anything. So there's essentially nothing to worry about if you were to disappear.
The locker is canon in the potc universe. You arent just blinking out of existence, youre spending it all floating through the water endlessly on the way to an empty white landmass.
its probably stinky on his boat though
and how would you jerk off if you had a crab claw instead of a hand
Do they get to drink?
yeah it's the black pearl curse (which is largely a net positive) with zero draw backs.
Arent they anhedonic though?
No
>The drink would not satisfy, food turned to ash in our mouths, nor the company in the world would harm or slake our lust. We are cursed men, Miss Turner. Compelled by greed, we were. But now, we are consumed by it.
he was lying to asway anyone also trying to achieve kinohood
that's barbosa talking about the curse they received from fricking with aztec gold. the question here is can the davy jones crew drink, eat, and frick holes. the REAL question is, would you join jones' crew knowing you'd turn into some random, disgusting sea monster man? they're not even technically immortal. at SOME point they rot and meld completely with the shape and pretty much become braindead
>they're not even technically immortal.
Yes they are. They're already dead.
>SOME point they rot and meld completely with the shape and pretty much become braindead
He's been doing it a long time and we only saw two people melded with the ship and both were melded within a cell. It's clearly a punishment for significant insubordination.
fair enough, but clearly it's not all it's set out to be, not that they make jones' crew look like the happy functional type to begin with
also now that i'm thinking of it, they also don't stay on the crew forever, they're all there serving a certain number of years, so what happens when they go free? do they die instantly since they were 230 years past when they should have died, or do they live out their natural lifespan? boom baby, back to not being technically immortal
you get to go to the locker but are rewarded with 99 virgins
>you spend eternity in the locker with 99 Cinemaphile posters
>which is largely a net positive
Can't quenche a thirst, can't satiate a hunger, can't bang out lust.
Pretty shit anon. Also the whole being a hammerhead shark man sounds rad, but you'll end up being the barnacle head.
No I would be a great white shark man hehe
Just my luck to turn into some gay sea cucumber man or seahorse while my mates are great whites and hammerheads
>Epic battle begins
>Anon pukes out his entire digestive system and then hides in the brig
Boy oh boy am I glad I get to do this for fifty more years.
I forget which mammal it is but I heard it's first defense was chewing it's own balls off and running.
That's us.
Hell almost certainly exists in the PotC world, considering all of the other supernatural things that exist.
Because eventually you get absorbed by the ship and spend eternity frozen in place.
That wasn't due to time on ship it was a punishment from Davy for severe insubordination.
TWO FIVES
6 MILLION FIVES
INFINITY FIVES
INFINITY SQUARED FIVES
YAR A LIAR
>shows dice
>universe implodes
>crew gasp and murmurs
>Hmmm Well done Master Turner, youre free to go
THREE NINES
It smells like ass on that ship, like raw fish and squid semen
You also smell that way so it would be an unbothersome smell. you'd get used to it like you do your own stink.
>davy jones and a kraken and immortal fishmen cannot even defeat a company
no thankyou. the least they could do is be powerful and they can't even manage that.
You know what they say, it's just good business
Why didn't Davy drop his heart chest deep under water? Only he could go that deep/ this makes more sense than putting it somewhere he literally can't go to besides every 10 years..
YUK PURRROOOOOOO
cant believe we ever pretended he was a good actor.
Sburroooo?
Because you dont "blink out of the existence" you moronic heathen. You get an actual afterlife, instead of being slowly turned into a ship decor.
you only become part of the ship as punishment
How come Orlando didn't look fishy like Davey Jones when he met with Keira and his son during his step on land time?
Something something, Jones was bad at his job
Jones stop ferrying souls so because he betrayed his job given to him by Calypso he was cursed with the fishiness. Legolas, however, did his job and just didn't become fishified.
You reckon Will refurbished the Dutchman into a fancy cruise ship for the dead souls? What's the service and hospitality like aboard?
He eventually did
And then his son broke the curse
Do you people even watch movies or what
Didn't watch the recent one yet
Oh, well sorry for spoiler. It's alright
It's awful so don't bother.
>watched dead men tell no tales in theaters back in 2017
>took some fat but big tittied mexican girl i worked with to see it
>literally one of my first dates ever, 2nd or 3rd max
>took her fat ass to get pizza, she ate 8/10ths of it
>then spent +80 bucks altogether for tickets and snacks
>watch whole movie with her
>she bails sometime shortly after it ends, leaves all her trash in her seat
>wants to be friends afterward
>year or two later she's recommended to me on social media and she looks like a rutting warthog and is a full blown dyke with a girl-wife and cat shit littered apartment and everything
it was a strange ass movie, a bad movie. the only one without johnny fricking depp, nearly the eponymous character, in it, as well. i like to think sometimes if that movie had been better i could have gotten at least a single chance to suck the jalapeno milk out of those big greasy honkers of hers. come to think of it, both times a girl has ever tricked me into cashing out for a date and then not giving hole, they've been spics. and that SECOND one now is a prostitute in the literal and digital sense. frick em i guess, they don't like me.
Count your blessings you dodged a bullet. She sounds like an ungrateful hog. Sad!
The afterlife literally indisputably canonically exists in the Pirates of the Caribbean universe, which makes you a real moron to frick with it
I always think that in any movie where someone knowingly makes a deal with an actual devil
I wish a movie would show a guy having a crisis of faith after seeing evidence of an actual afterlife. even generic ghosts or zombies would make me question things
>watching Ghost Rider with my boomer uncle
>the scene where he makes a deal with the devil
>"I would probably do that, it looks cool"
>he seethes about it the rest of the day and tells my dad I need to find God
YOU put the movie on Dave
Right? If the actual devil came and made me an offer with indisputable proof, I would immediately become the most devout, evangelistic Christian on earth, and you'd be a moron for not doing the same. Or if you're a gambling man take the deal, use it for good, THEN be a goody two-shoes since the Christian god is ultimately in charge and can just yoink your soul back if you've earned enough Good Boy Points.
An immortal pirate life, or even just an immortal sailor life sounds pretty amazing.
But Jones himself, in the movies, was kind of a basic fricking b***h, and I wouldn't want to be his minion forever. Like half the day he mopes around in his cabin pining for a fricking woman. If either the captain was a better bro, or there was no leader that the crew was enthralled to, them sure I'd be down.
was the cgi for him as impressive as I remember
100%
a true testament to the kind of visual fidelity a movie could pull off if it just wasn't staffed by a bunch of brown morons and had money lazily thrown at it by rich israelites
why was the first movie the only good one
The first three were passable
Four was real "frick it I'm out" territory though
What the frick are there now, like seven
>soul-stealing curses around every corner
>whole islands where they just brutally torture criminals
>cannibal islands
>constant hangings
>tons of actual pillaging and raping by pirates
>afterlife (best case scenario) is just a weird limbo with magical crabs
I think the POTC universe sucks!
You fricking morons, Calypso specifically says that Davy Jones' locker ISN'T the normal afterlife, it's where you go if you get eaten by the Kraken/sent there by Davy Jones I guess. We don't see the actual afterlife. Lorelets.