>why yes Mr Boromir this swarthy unwashed homeless man is your rightful King and head of state. Sure your family has been ruling Gondor for 900 years but hes Isidulr's Heir! Huh? WHAT? So what he just happens to be my distant nephew and is betrothed to my daughter stop asking so many anti-elvanic questions!
Nothing Ever Happens Shirt $21.68 |
DMT Has Friends For Me Shirt $21.68 |
Nothing Ever Happens Shirt $21.68 |
Does anyone else think it's weird how Gondor used to mint their own Castars but now they pay Rivendell to do it, but since Rivendell only accepts payment in Castars and charges interest on the Castars they mint, there's no possible way for Gondor to ever fully pay back their debt?
he never said that
Were you there? Thought not.
yes he did, you unfunny autist
Men? Men are WEAK.
Because of the vaxx
and elves are gays
>”Men are weak. I was there when the strength of men failed”
>ignores the time elves chimped out over muh hecking israeliteels
Why didn't the eagles just fly my dick into your mum's pussy? Hahahaahshahaa
>ignores the time elves chimped out over muh hecking israeliteels
It was among the elves. It was real greaseball shit.
Why didn't the Elves turn Mordor into a gigantic, beautiful forest? Why didn't the Dwarves turn Mt. Doom or the mountains surrounding Mordor into their own immense city? There was so much land freely available ripe for the taking.
Because the land is... LE EVIL!
They did, and most of the fortresses in Mordor were garrisoned by humans to stop it turning to shit again. But then Mt Doom started erupting again and it went to shit pretty quickly.
>entire world
>only like 3-4 kingdoms, maybe 100k or so people combined living in maybe 3 towns and 2 castles
>no trade, no infrastructure, no nothing
This is the shittiest worldbuilding I've ever seen.
it's literal dystopia for them. the elves have left, the men and dwarves have fallen. did you not see the crumbling ruins that they journey past?
there are more farms and towns in the books, and at the end Frodo mentions Aragorn's going to fix all the roads and shit that are falling apart in the north
Hope he puts up some more bridges. Having to go eight miles between Brandywine and the next bridge is horseshit.
how does he pay for it though?
it doesnt say explicitly but im pretty sure the haradrim and payed tribute after mordor fell
In the appendix it mentions a tax on unrealized gains
you don't remember when nine of the human kings were turned to evil and their realms ruined?
Do they even have a tax policy?
No but they have a very effective subsidy policy for protecting local mithril forgers
BTFO
Eriador was completely depopulated by the Witch King, of course there's barely anyone living up there, the lands past it like Gondor and Rhovanion have a lot more kingdoms and people.
>yes Boromir, you are correct, Glorfindel could single-handedly take the ring up to the mountain and cast it into the fire, killing anyone and anything in his path with his godly powers.
>but this time, the people of Middle Earth must solve their own problems
>we will only interfere if they attack Zi- I mean Rivindell in a direct attack
Glorfindel would be corrupted and become the next Sauron.
Next midwit objection?
glorfindel deez nuts and lúthien my crack
glorfindel cucking kink immunizes him against dominating others
I hope people realize that Sauron could have manifested a physical form if he really wanted to in the movies. There was even a deleted scene of Aragorn battling Sauron.
The reason they used stealth was BECAUSE they wanted Sauron overconfident and not using 100% of his resources. Telling Glorfindel to rage through Mordor would have made Sauron do exactly this.
>There was even a deleted scene of Aragorn battling Sauron.
That's Aragorn beheading The Mouth of Sauron, a different guy
?si=ecv_9snufLy3UCzA
He is talking about how originally the battle with the armored troll was going to be Sauron in physical form but they didn't want to take away from Frodo and the ring.
>That's Aragorn beheading The Mouth of Sauron, a different guy
kek what a fricking ringlet
Elrond hid a war criminal
Humans were Eru's favorite. Elves were semi-divine.
Aragorn is a fusion dance of both. Regular pleb Men need this homie as an example to lead them into the 4th Age, so they don't succumb to their baser instincts like the Easterlings.
Elves are the eldest children with inborn responsibilities. Humans are the little brother who gets the most favoritism.
Dwarves are the red-headed step child of the bunch.
Hobbits are Cousin Oliver.
Humans get the "gift" of death. Funnily enough, Tolkien never actually established why death was a "gift" (officially speaking) so in many respects Melkor was right.
Melkor did nothing wrong.
>elf free afterlife
sounds like a great gift
It's a "gift" because elves can't go frick this shit I'm out to Arda even after they die. They're stuck as spirits haunting the Halls of Mandos until the end of time. Not cool.
Elves aren't "stuck" they can reincarnate. Most just just to stay out of Middle Earth and live in Valinor.
They can but how many do besides the famous Glorfindel?
Why didn't Feanor break out and reincarnate or Gil-galad come back to fight Sauron? You can't deny having some of those guys back would have helped a lot.
It’s an Eru’s will sort of thing.
Mandos decides to do it
he decided to dab on faenor and make him the only elf who would never be reincarnated
Most elves are too emotionally wrecked by their life to be able to reincarnate. Even the evil ones struggle and have to posses mortal bodies to wear to do it. That’s why Sauron is called the necromancer he can speak to and house these shades in bodies.
The doom of man is a gift because they are severed from the material world upon death and escape the corruption on Morgoth. His evil touched every part of Arda in some small way and the elves will never be free of it. I think it is also suggested that mankind will join the choir that produces the next world free of Morgoth’s misery in the end of all things.
I wonder if the writer believed in a holy permanent reunion with their creator upon death or something...
Damn, it's almost like the author is a Christian who believes heaven is the best reward one can receive.
Hobbits are humans. They share the same fate as men and are basically just a pygmy race of men.
>Sure your family has been ruling Gondor for 900 years but hes Isidulr's Heir! Huh? WHAT? So what he just happens to be my distant nephew and is betrothed to my daughter stop asking so many anti-elvanic questions!
this is why George Washington invented the constitution
and look where that got us
To the most prosperous times in history?
To one of the most prosperous time periods in the entire world's history?
i love how this film starts so good only to go down-hill after great character introductions and world/story building, why would they not simply give ring to Boromir
I just compiled that and it opened up CP
>"ORCS could be here" he thought, "I've never been in this forest before. There could be ORCS anywhere." The cool wind felt good against his bare nose. "I HATE ORCS" he thought. Far Over the Misty Mountains Cold reverberated around the campfire, making the company sway even as the half penny ale circulated through his powerful thick veins and washed away his (merited) fear of wargs after dark. "With a pony, you can go anywhere you want" he said to himself, outloud.
literally me
AI written gibberish.
why did you need AI to write 3 words?
Why did we never hear shit about the rest of the planet?
Anything outside of medieval Europe is irrelevant.
Sauron won already, the blue wizards couldn’t stem the tide and the Morgoth cult covered most the world. Glorifindle and Galadriel were like spotlights burning the darkness that was engulfing the rest of the world back. The third age is really dark and apocalyptic underneath Tolkiens fairy story prose.
You could set a Cormac McCarthy tale or berserk within the 3rd age and not change the tone.
That would make it even more interesting. Have the blue wizards journeying through hostile lands, it would be kino.
The blue wizards dying unsung in the east, their work going unknown to the fellowship and their allies is too bold. No, we must have girlboss Galadriel instead.
The Valar fricked up by not dealing with Morgoth and instead beckoning the elves to come west with them, abandoning the men to be fricked over.
Gondor couldn't exert any influence past Umbar and Rhovanion so we have no in-universe justification to know about what actually happens in places like Far Harad or Rhun.
Sorry but the divine right trumps your fee fees
>he never said that
the aragorn plot was actually moronic bloat that brought the trilogy down a notch
And what would a ranger know of fiscal policy?
Maybe he was an accountant before he became a ranger. His early life remains largely unaddressed in the cannon. He’s a mysterious cat
He was mentored by elves, specifically Elrond.
He was mentored by an Elf who's been ruling his own region for over a millennium and who used to be the right hand man of an Elven king, Aragorn is if anything overqualified for actually being a good king.
>Betrothed
Elrond didn't want Aragorn to marry his daughter though.
why is there an uptick of lotr threads recently?
Theoden King passed away recently.
>Where now are the horse and the rider? Where is the horn that was blowing?
>Where is the helm and the hauberk, and the bright hair flowing?
>Where is the harp on the harpstring, and the red fire glowing?
>Where is the spring and the harvest and the tall corn growing?
>They have passed like rain on the mountain, like a wind in the meadow;
>The days have gone down in the West behind the hills into shadow.
>Who shall gather the smoke of the deadwood burning,
>Or behold the flowing years from the Sea returning?
RIP Bernard Hill
>Nazgûl hastily ride out of Mordor to look for a guy who might have found the ring 78 years ago