Well, Duke Nukem 3D is a parody of action and sci-fi movies, so it's inherently meta. It would make little sense to make a straightforward film about Duke Nukem as an action hero because the fun of Duke Nukem is in how the game both takes him seriously and uses him and his world as a parody. It would probably take a genius writer to translate this somehow to a modern film and retain the charm.
it will be an overt parody of toxic masculinity. Duke will be a loser and "the chicks" will be the ones who actually save the day while Duke gets the undeserved credkt.
I feel like it’ll be one of those where the title character isn’t the main character, he’ll be used as a tool to show how masculinity is bad and how the female sidekick is right and the real hero all along
it is not about duke nukem but it is one of the best audio trolls ever and people confuse it with the duke nukem ventrillo troll.
what happened to ventrillo anyway? im not even going to look.
Well, Duke Nukem 3D is a parody of action and sci-fi movies, so it's inherently meta. It would make little sense to make a straightforward film about Duke Nukem as an action hero because the fun of Duke Nukem is in how the game both takes him seriously and uses him and his world as a parody. It would probably take a genius writer to translate this somehow to a modern film and retain the charm.
it will be an overt parody of toxic masculinity. Duke will be a loser and "the chicks" will be the ones who actually save the day while Duke gets the undeserved credkt.
No matter what happens it'll be shit. There is no winning move here. Here's the possibilities >It comes out and is actually some what faithful to Duke. But because that it is based on a 90's videogame, is immediately outdated, with humor that no longer works >It comes out, and is faithful to the games. But because of current woke politics, a large amount of the audience shit on it for being "sexist" or whatever >It comes out, is nothing like the game. More woke, and tolerant of current norms. As such is totally absent of what made the original stuff work, is shit, and panned by everyone.
And that last one is the most likely. If they were going to make a movie, they should have done it in the 90's. It'll never work now.
Agreed. 3rd option is what will happen, 2nd is what the fans want, 1st would be the compromise but woketards never compromise, hence option 3 being the most likely scenario.
Yeah everything he says will be met with cringes from the other characters and maybe a lecture then at the end he will learn the error of his ways or some bullshit and pass the torch to the strong poc woman that is like totally badass despite weighing 80lbs and never touching a weight in her life.
>watch our politically correct series about X character became the X we now and love, except it will be another character entirely for the entire series and won't become that in the end"
Can't wait
>Duke Nukem
"According to a report by Deadline, Josh Heald, Jon Hurwitz and Hayden Schlossberg, the creative trio behind Cobra Kai, are producing the film with Legendary Entertainment. Development is in the early stages."
netflix
>Legendary Pictures
They did Godzilla well, they did Dune well.
I hope this turns out better than the last time they adapted a video game (Warcraft).
I am also hoping that they get John Cena to play Duke here like it was going to be in the cancelled Michael Bay version.
I'm surprised that the Duke Nukem movie has been in development hell for nearly 30 years, mirroring the similar development hell of Duke Nukem Forever.
At this point, this is going to be The Thief and the Cobbler of video game movies.
The Sonic movie also took nearly 30 years to get out of development hell, but Duke Nukem may take even longer than that.
>I hope this turns out better than the last time they adapted a video game (Warcraft).
To be honest they did the best they could with Warcraft. Early Blizz was fricking DENSE with the lore. To be honest they shouldn't have started until they had 3 movies greenlit a la LOTR.
If it just stays true to the satire it could work, the overtop nature of duke nukem I feel like translates to the big screen (or the 4k television screen) pretty well. The issue I fear is them playing their hand, yes duke nukem is a satire of macho manliness and America duh, but don't get preachy just keep the tone from the games and it'll work. Sexy big breasted women and all.
I disagree anon, in the age of absolutely no subtly something like Duke nukem actually makes a lot of sense. It'll be a Rorschach test for the audience's political beliefs, if you're a redpilled loser guy you'll see Duke as a based alpha male and if you're a lib you'll see it as a satire of conservative men. It's literally a perfect crowd pleaser. They'll just make one of duke's chicks black and that's it.
>Sonic >Animal Crossing >Metal Gear Solid digital graphic novel motion comics >Final Fantasy >Resident Evil CGI anime >The Human Apartheid live action short film for Deus Ex: Mankind Divided >Pokemon anime >Mario anime movie
Yes. Toho and Madhouse made a JAPAN-ONRY anime movie.
It's really good and it's a nice and comfy slice-of-life anime movie.
They perfectly captured Animal Crossing in film form.
Street Fighter II: The Animated Movie is also pure kino.
I'm not even a fighting game gay (except for Smash) yet it's one of my favourite video game movies of all time.
Professor Layton was good.
Too bad Level-5's next movie Ni no Kuni was such a massive failure that it was dumped straight to Netflix outside of Japan.
It was Ni no Kuni in name only, and it wasn't even made by Studio Ghibli and it shows.
There will be no early 2000s gratuitous nudity and will only be capable of being carried on its violence because you know that the writing and jokes are going to suck and be sanitized for troonys
Would you guys accept a gender swapped version that remained completely true to the source material in every other way? Like a heavily muscled aggressive dom chick who shoots guns and grabs men on their dicks and calls them sweetie and forces them to do stuff haha?
Yes. This was made after Peacemaker did well. It will be like Peacemaker as in Duke Nukem will be a far right macho guy and woman and blacks and lesbians will keep berating him about how bad he is until we learn he is only the way he is due to an abusive father (Doctor Proton) who becomes the bad guy. I would not be shocked if John Cena stars in this too
back story where Duke has a clearly diagnosed mental illness with all kinds of delusions that we see in "duke vision" moments where he thinks woman are sex objects or chinese are insects.
all the other half breed nog and female characters know about his diagnosis and whenever an ape becomes offended, they say "remember about his condition", leave him be and he can kill the aliens for us.
not one ounce of it will be sincere or decent.
duke was meant to be a sort of parody in the first place, but you can't have humour anymore in any real form.
there is no sincerity.
Not going to hold my breath on it being good or faithful BUT I do like the Cobra Kai series and maybe since Top Gun has done so well hollyisraelite might just pump the brakes on wokeness(wishful thinking I know).
I saw a post either here or on Cinemaphile on how to revive the series. Can do the same idea for the movie, literal Demolition man rip off with Duke being frozen for when humanity needs him and have him unfrozen in the present politically correct world to stop the aliens
The movie would be excellent if it's paced well, with Duke arrogantly stumbling through awkward encounters with woke society inbetween action sequences. Duke as a combination of Johnny Bravo and Postal Dude. Unfortunately you just know whoever's in charge will just play it completely straight with minority/women characters everywhere because they'd rather be in charge and soil the IP than the opposite. Just look at Randy b***hford.
Uwe Boll could unironically maybe pull it off. He did a decent job with Postal and he has the right sense of humor overall. But unfortunately Mr. Boll would likely not get hired for something like this.
If the Zucker brothers were still making movies there's a chance it could be funny and memorable. But everyone is such a bean-counter with demographics and marketing that a funny un-pc action movie is unheard of now. It would at most be a quippy Marvel knockoff or ultra-serious ripoff like Doom.
I don't want another Johnny Lawrence situation where Duke is stuck in his ways but the rest of the world moved on and mocks him for sticking to his guns. It's such a boring premise.
It was already made. Duke is a caricature of masculinity and action heros who was based off the ptrotag of They Live. If it's actually made it'll be pozzed to the point where he won't say anything coarse using only family friendly quips, and have a female side kick mary sue.
the game worked because you could play as a generic action hero that looked like a genetic blend of action heros while spouting lines taken from various action heros.
it was a fun time with diminishing returns over the years.
last action hero did a similar thing in the medium of film, it had a genuine action hero lead and turned out to be a decent film.
it was a box office faliure.
Sooooooooooooooooo.... what amazing concept do the writers have up their sleeves because I dont see how this can work as a film unless there is some meta genius in the oven (and I predict that is not the case)
It can certainly be done if the writers just make a modern 80s Schwarzenegger action movie. Play it straight as a board, with one-liners, aliens, and a couple of babes to save. The important thing is to not be too self-aware because Duke was never self-aware. The parody comes from not how silly Duke is, but how inherently silly the movies he referenced were.
but this may make white males feel good about themselves, start talking to girls and joke around, have sex and make more dispicable christian white people.
and we just cant have that, can we.
Everyone (especially boomers, who actually have money) is sick of the woke dishonesty.
If done right Duke could be a huge shift in the zeitgeist. Make it fun, smart and badass. Do it. >that kid who made his house in the duke3d Build engine as a kid.
this "franchise" made like two cool games 30 years ago, maybe it's time to be forgotten
making new ips in Hollywood is the equivalent of letting go of free money
basedcucks are gonna buy tickets cause member berries
these
duke 3d
duke nukem time to kill
duke nukem zero hour
3 games
Manhattan Project is based
>two
one is D3D, what's the other one?
throoo time
console don't count, none were good
one game, to rule them all
Well, he deserves a real franchise
>i suck balls all day just because i like it so much
Get off this vent or I'll have you bent
such a great line
>I like man ass
I feel like it’ll be one of those where the title character isn’t the main character, he’ll be used as a tool to show how masculinity is bad and how the female sidekick is right and the real hero all along
>ok.... who? who joined my channel?
>I FRICK MAN ASS
i frick man ass?
it is not about duke nukem but it is one of the best audio trolls ever and people confuse it with the duke nukem ventrillo troll.
what happened to ventrillo anyway? im not even going to look.
I want a list of everyone on lord of the rings righteousness now
Balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls balls
>I came here to be alone...
Well, Duke Nukem 3D is a parody of action and sci-fi movies, so it's inherently meta. It would make little sense to make a straightforward film about Duke Nukem as an action hero because the fun of Duke Nukem is in how the game both takes him seriously and uses him and his world as a parody. It would probably take a genius writer to translate this somehow to a modern film and retain the charm.
it will be an overt parody of toxic masculinity. Duke will be a loser and "the chicks" will be the ones who actually save the day while Duke gets the undeserved credkt.
Bombshell will also appear and outperform Duke in every way. Afterwards they reveal that she's getting her own movie.
Duke is a pastiche of 80s action heroes, not a parody. Learn the difference.
No he's not. He's a fricking parody of 80s action heros. You seem like an overweight boomer who relishes in his 80s manchildhood.
>Well, Duke Nukem 3D is a parody of action and sci-fi movies
That Pulp Fiction stage in the playstation version was my favorite.
>Making a Duke Nukem movie after 2005
It’s 100% going to be a disaster.
Another franchise they'll bring from the dead to rape for no reason
TRANS RIGHTS
If it lacks "Shake it, baby," then it will lack my money.
Shake it baby. Shake it baby. Wanna dance? Shake it baby. Wanna dance? Wanna dance?
>Duke smashes exit button at the end of every episode
imagine if they replaced him with an edgy lesbian woman with dyed hair and tattoos, that would be cringe kino
Dyke Nukem
I would watch it 100 percent if it isn't pozzed.
Of COURSE it will be shit. 99% of all films produced by the limp wristed homosexuals in Hollywood are shit, this will be no different.
>It's time to dilate and kick some Nazi ass. And I'm all out of dilators.
No matter what happens it'll be shit. There is no winning move here. Here's the possibilities
>It comes out and is actually some what faithful to Duke. But because that it is based on a 90's videogame, is immediately outdated, with humor that no longer works
>It comes out, and is faithful to the games. But because of current woke politics, a large amount of the audience shit on it for being "sexist" or whatever
>It comes out, is nothing like the game. More woke, and tolerant of current norms. As such is totally absent of what made the original stuff work, is shit, and panned by everyone.
And that last one is the most likely. If they were going to make a movie, they should have done it in the 90's. It'll never work now.
Agreed. 3rd option is what will happen, 2nd is what the fans want, 1st would be the compromise but woketards never compromise, hence option 3 being the most likely scenario.
3 is going to be how it turns out for sure, especially with Randy "cuck magician paedophile" Pritchard owning the IP these days
Duke will be the butt of the joke because his masculinity and sexism will be portrayed as archaic and embarrassing.
Yeah everything he says will be met with cringes from the other characters and maybe a lecture then at the end he will learn the error of his ways or some bullshit and pass the torch to the strong poc woman that is like totally badass despite weighing 80lbs and never touching a weight in her life.
Yes, it is impossible to create a good show/movie based on a video game. They can only barely pull it off with books, sometimes.
It will be like that chuck steel trampires movie, not very funny .
No. Nobody wants to see how Duke became the "cool badass" that he is thanks to some women/POC we never heard about until now.
>watch our politically correct series about X character became the X we now and love, except it will be another character entirely for the entire series and won't become that in the end"
Can't wait
Inb4 the showrunners state "we've never played the game before"
>those alien bastards are gonna pay for fricking up my pronouns
Underrated
>Duke Nukem
"According to a report by Deadline, Josh Heald, Jon Hurwitz and Hayden Schlossberg, the creative trio behind Cobra Kai, are producing the film with Legendary Entertainment. Development is in the early stages."
netflix
it will suck
>Legendary Pictures
They did Godzilla well, they did Dune well.
I hope this turns out better than the last time they adapted a video game (Warcraft).
I am also hoping that they get John Cena to play Duke here like it was going to be in the cancelled Michael Bay version.
I'm surprised that the Duke Nukem movie has been in development hell for nearly 30 years, mirroring the similar development hell of Duke Nukem Forever.
At this point, this is going to be The Thief and the Cobbler of video game movies.
The Sonic movie also took nearly 30 years to get out of development hell, but Duke Nukem may take even longer than that.
>I hope this turns out better than the last time they adapted a video game (Warcraft).
To be honest they did the best they could with Warcraft. Early Blizz was fricking DENSE with the lore. To be honest they shouldn't have started until they had 3 movies greenlit a la LOTR.
Megaton re-release when?
>Alpha White male hero who loves women and is super bad ass
>in 2022
>in america no less
Hahahahahaha. It's gonna be so fricking bad.
If it just stays true to the satire it could work, the overtop nature of duke nukem I feel like translates to the big screen (or the 4k television screen) pretty well. The issue I fear is them playing their hand, yes duke nukem is a satire of macho manliness and America duh, but don't get preachy just keep the tone from the games and it'll work. Sexy big breasted women and all.
I disagree anon, in the age of absolutely no subtly something like Duke nukem actually makes a lot of sense. It'll be a Rorschach test for the audience's political beliefs, if you're a redpilled loser guy you'll see Duke as a based alpha male and if you're a lib you'll see it as a satire of conservative men. It's literally a perfect crowd pleaser. They'll just make one of duke's chicks black and that's it.
has a single video game movie ever not sucked girthy lengths of massive donkey penis?
>Sonic
>Animal Crossing
>Metal Gear Solid digital graphic novel motion comics
>Final Fantasy
>Resident Evil CGI anime
>The Human Apartheid live action short film for Deus Ex: Mankind Divided
>Pokemon anime
>Mario anime movie
Also, the Persona 3 anime movies.
There have also been tons of visual novels that have been adapted as good anime.
>Animal Crossing
Does it really exist? Aside from the Chris Chan one.
Yes. Toho and Madhouse made a JAPAN-ONRY anime movie.
It's really good and it's a nice and comfy slice-of-life anime movie.
They perfectly captured Animal Crossing in film form.
Ah I never heard of it. Thanks, Anon.
Street Fighter II: The Animated Movie is also pure kino.
I'm not even a fighting game gay (except for Smash) yet it's one of my favourite video game movies of all time.
That one based on a professor something by a Jap is reviewed liked the Lego movie
Professor Layton was good.
Too bad Level-5's next movie Ni no Kuni was such a massive failure that it was dumped straight to Netflix outside of Japan.
It was Ni no Kuni in name only, and it wasn't even made by Studio Ghibli and it shows.
>will it be shit?
well yeah, that's the objective
There's literally no reason to dredge up Duke for a movie other than to tarnish another dead IP to subvert it for modern propaganda.
>Those aliens said trans folks aren’t heckin valid and poggers? That is NOT bussin.
It’ll be shit
Is this the containment thread where pol/cels all get upset at their own assumptions
As if the vast majority of new adaptations of old properties don't predictably rape the source material in the same ways, you disingenuous homosexual
You're just going to gobble that bait up after it's been sitting there untouched for almost 9 hours?
There will be no early 2000s gratuitous nudity and will only be capable of being carried on its violence because you know that the writing and jokes are going to suck and be sanitized for troonys
I miss when we still openly mocked gays and transvestites
In 2022 Duke would see a troony and say "That is one hell of a woman. I want to blow it out of her ass"
basado
Sometimes it happens again but the game is shit.
>Funcoland
I want to go back
IF BAY IS NOT DIRECTING IT, IT WILL BE SHIT.
James Gunn can do Duke justice.
Have you seen Bad Boys 3? It was so static and boring. Bay is an old boomer with low energy now
Yes, the time for that was in the late 90s.
Would you guys accept a gender swapped version that remained completely true to the source material in every other way? Like a heavily muscled aggressive dom chick who shoots guns and grabs men on their dicks and calls them sweetie and forces them to do stuff haha?
Haha that would be weird could you imagine haha
That's just Bayonetta
You mean Bombshell's original concept art? Yes.
Pump my ass full cum untill your all out of cum
AOC to play the role of Peggy
Yes. This was made after Peacemaker did well. It will be like Peacemaker as in Duke Nukem will be a far right macho guy and woman and blacks and lesbians will keep berating him about how bad he is until we learn he is only the way he is due to an abusive father (Doctor Proton) who becomes the bad guy. I would not be shocked if John Cena stars in this too
This. There's a 0% chance it will be anything else.
back story where Duke has a clearly diagnosed mental illness with all kinds of delusions that we see in "duke vision" moments where he thinks woman are sex objects or chinese are insects.
all the other half breed nog and female characters know about his diagnosis and whenever an ape becomes offended, they say "remember about his condition", leave him be and he can kill the aliens for us.
not one ounce of it will be sincere or decent.
duke was meant to be a sort of parody in the first place, but you can't have humour anymore in any real form.
there is no sincerity.
Yes
>masculine sexist white male
Not in 2022 sweetie
Not going to hold my breath on it being good or faithful BUT I do like the Cobra Kai series and maybe since Top Gun has done so well hollyisraelite might just pump the brakes on wokeness(wishful thinking I know).
>Cobra Kai
>Top Gun
Grading shit on a curve isn't helpful
It will suck. Everything suck nowadays. Duke is hard to make in 90s now it completely impossible.
I saw a post either here or on Cinemaphile on how to revive the series. Can do the same idea for the movie, literal Demolition man rip off with Duke being frozen for when humanity needs him and have him unfrozen in the present politically correct world to stop the aliens
The movie would be excellent if it's paced well, with Duke arrogantly stumbling through awkward encounters with woke society inbetween action sequences. Duke as a combination of Johnny Bravo and Postal Dude. Unfortunately you just know whoever's in charge will just play it completely straight with minority/women characters everywhere because they'd rather be in charge and soil the IP than the opposite. Just look at Randy b***hford.
Uwe Boll could unironically maybe pull it off. He did a decent job with Postal and he has the right sense of humor overall. But unfortunately Mr. Boll would likely not get hired for something like this.
If the Zucker brothers were still making movies there's a chance it could be funny and memorable. But everyone is such a bean-counter with demographics and marketing that a funny un-pc action movie is unheard of now. It would at most be a quippy Marvel knockoff or ultra-serious ripoff like Doom.
>making a Duke Nukem anything after the travesty that was Forever
Lmao
I don't want another Johnny Lawrence situation where Duke is stuck in his ways but the rest of the world moved on and mocks him for sticking to his guns. It's such a boring premise.
It is a pretty shit premise but I can think of one recent example where it was done right
Hell Yeah time to kill some space Alien Nazis. Black Lives Matter.
hahaha read it in his voice
No one kneels on blacks, and lives!
>Made after 2012
Yes
>will it be shit
yes
It was already made. Duke is a caricature of masculinity and action heros who was based off the ptrotag of They Live. If it's actually made it'll be pozzed to the point where he won't say anything coarse using only family friendly quips, and have a female side kick mary sue.
My name is Dooki Nooki
Yes.
If they can’t even make a good Halo show, how can they not mess up Duke.
the game worked because you could play as a generic action hero that looked like a genetic blend of action heros while spouting lines taken from various action heros.
it was a fun time with diminishing returns over the years.
last action hero did a similar thing in the medium of film, it had a genuine action hero lead and turned out to be a decent film.
it was a box office faliure.
Sooooooooooooooooo.... what amazing concept do the writers have up their sleeves because I dont see how this can work as a film unless there is some meta genius in the oven (and I predict that is not the case)
It can certainly be done if the writers just make a modern 80s Schwarzenegger action movie. Play it straight as a board, with one-liners, aliens, and a couple of babes to save. The important thing is to not be too self-aware because Duke was never self-aware. The parody comes from not how silly Duke is, but how inherently silly the movies he referenced were.
but this may make white males feel good about themselves, start talking to girls and joke around, have sex and make more dispicable christian white people.
and we just cant have that, can we.
And what would it take for you to take your meds?
I look forward to watching this in 2042
if they go FULL 80s mode
it can be fricking epic.
but if they go woked route
its fricking over
no cap
Everyone (especially boomers, who actually have money) is sick of the woke dishonesty.
If done right Duke could be a huge shift in the zeitgeist. Make it fun, smart and badass. Do it.
>that kid who made his house in the duke3d Build engine as a kid.
>trans rights dammit
Sonic didnt get a good game in ages and the movies were a succes, maybe the same could happen to duke
did they ever release Duke Nukem 4'ever or is that still vaporware?
They didn't
Why the frick now, of all times???
Hell yeah, always wanted to know what Duke would look like as a black woman