With the critical re-evaluation of the prequels going on right now and the re-release of the Phantom Menace I decided to re-watch Episode 2 for the fi...

With the critical re-evaluation of the prequels going on right now and the re-release of the Phantom Menace I decided to re-watch Episode 2 for the first time since it released.

I have to say, this got unfairly railroaded in the extreme. I don't understand how people can say it's dogshit or even the worst of the 6. Hayden Christianson and Natalie's Portman's acting is fine, the scenes are classical romance which is appropriate because it's an opera and matches the grand political narratives the story is telling and the characters that are involved in it. Everything in the scenes on Naboo - the visual shots and the dialogue are idealized and dreamlike. It's stiff because the characters are supposed to be stiff, it's a knight who has taken a vow of celibacy and a noblewoman who is required to project grace and wisdom at all times. That's why the romance is forbidden. They're not supposed to watch tv and frick, for both of them an illicit affair can destroy their whole lives.

Further, Palatine as early as episode 2 is setting up Anakin to turn by being father figure to him, encouraging his ambition and sending him off on vacation together with prime teenage Natalie Portman. There's no last minute ass pull stuff going on like virtually every other movie. The plot progressively builds until the finale in Revenge of the Sith with all of the steps along the way artfully placed there.

The Clones are cool. The arena is cool. The battle on geonosis is cool. Count Dooku is cool. The police detective subplot is cool. The whole movie is actually great.

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  1. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    nah, the prequels still suck ass

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Your mom sucked my ass last night.

      didn’t read lol. george lost. redlettermedia won.

      Ok boomer

      Quit posting here Hayden. Episode 2 sucks. Actually, all 9 of them suck now. It’s over.

      Starwars been retroactively been killed, ill give you that

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Fpfb
      You'll have the sequels being defended in 10 years.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        This won't happen. No one expected a prequel resurgence at all, and if you told someone it would happen in 2012, they'd think you were smoking crack. The sequels won't have a comeback merely because the prequels did. The prequels were deliberately made for a new audience that is now defending them, largely against bitter OT fans (Lucas explicitly knew that there would be bitter OT fans). But the sequels exist purely to placate those same bitter OT fans, no new audience has been created by the sequels.

        We're now 10 years out from TFA, and there are no signs of a general resurgence. In fact, every metric we have shows that even Disney doesn't have faith in their own trilogy and pivoted pretty heavily back into prequel and OT era stories. Compare the amount of tie in material for the PT and the ST and it's extremely stark. Even toy sales, which I think it a pretty solid metric of how much kids like something, are seriously down. There hasn't been a new sequel lego set in years.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          The Disney sequels are literally indefensible. The prequels are flawed masterpieces

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            No one cares about TFA, and ROS is universally seen as an irredeemable mess. The only sequel that still has any sort of buzz is TLJ, and even the people who really like that movie and defend it aren't going to be sticking around to do so for years.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Seethe all you like. People are actually watching the prequels and judging for themselves instead of parroting those gays at RLM.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >People are actually watching the prequels and judging for themselves
        Uhoh, prequelgays!

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          cool

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      You obsess over video game achievements homie

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Zoomers weren’t old enough at the time to experience them during release. They were widely disliked by normies and the long time fans. The only ones I remember enjoying them who were adults, were idiots and shitskins. Usually both.

  2. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    didn’t read lol. george lost. redlettermedia won.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      watch the RLM reviews

      Anyone that unironically parrots that fat alcoholic boomer is a low IQ philistine.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >RLM still makes zoomer prequelgays seethe to this day over their funny little YouTube reviews

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          it's more that they acted like they knew how to make a movie because they could trash the prequels but then they release Space Cop which deserves its own episode where RLM trashes it but oh wait, it's their own shitty work lmao.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            No, you don't understand. They made it bad on purpose. That way no one can make fun of them for it. Get it? They never failed because they never tried!

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              Exactly, it's a bad look after making your fame for bashing someone else's allegedly bad work. They have no excuse, the reviews they did are poisoned with the knowledge that they themselves can't make a good movie.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >everyone has to become a director in order to say shit smells bad
            the absolute state of you people

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              Mike didn’t just say the prequels were bad. He implied he was smarter than George Lucas and could do better.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Yeah, everyone is. He writes like a child. What's your point?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                The Force Awakens literally implemented all of Mike’s suggestions. They even made the lightsaber fights slow and gay just like he recommended. If that’s not proof that Mike is spiritually bankrupt as a director than I don’t know what to tell you.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >prequelbabies have to now argue TFA was a bad movie
                The absolute state, it made like 4 billion dollars lol

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >massively exaggerates TFA's box office
                >thinks that money = quality
                Where's the daily Avatar threads then, dumb frick? God, I'm so tired of how moronic you children are here.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >exaggerated
                what a cope, general audiences loved TFA seethe more and die mad about it
                >threads on Cinemaphile indicate a movie's success
                You are terminally online.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >this globally well liked and financially successful movie uhhh acshually isn't though because uhhh I didn't make a bait thread about it to post wojacks in
                The absolute fricking state of this board.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >this globally well liked
                That NOBODY talks about when it's not in the theaters, and that NOBODY bought the merchandise that went on deep clearance.
                >b-b-but it's globally well liked because I said so to support my bullshit claims!!!
                Yes, it's so well liked that nobody really talks about it, you dumb, dumb frick.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Why are you so mad? We had threads about TFA for fricking years on this board, my very summer newfriend. Regular people who aren't terminally online and autistic usually refer to TFA as the only really good one of the nu trilogy.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >that means money=gud!
                okay, homosexual.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Why are you so mad that people like TFA for?

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Yeah even though I still don't love the prequels Lucas is genuinely one of the most interesting and kinda amazing people in the history of Hollywood. That said I'm gonna defend RLM a bit because they were by no means the only - or even first Gen Xers to act like this about the prequels. I find people who blame RLM for the prequel backlash really must've missed the entire 2000s because that shit was everywhere.

        That said Mike recommending JJ Abrams to direct Star Wars movies will never not be funny. But I genuinely don't think it's actually Mike's fault. It's EVERYONE of those Gen Xers who wouldn't stop whining about how George Lucas raped their childhoods for almost 20 years straight

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Get a better father figure.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Get a job.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          who the hell wants to work for israelites?
          lol frick you and frick them.
          RLM is for friendless drunks btw

  3. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Quit posting here Hayden. Episode 2 sucks. Actually, all 9 of them suck now. It’s over.

  4. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Let's re-evaluate the prequels fellow kids!
    Frick off Disney shill.

  5. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    watch the RLM reviews

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I have, they're inaccurate

      >Don't believe your lying eyes, believe an obese alcoholic manchild instead

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I did and they were a double digit iq take that only a moron would take seriously. JJ, directing starwars, yea that turned out great lol, lmao even

        Yeah but some of nitpicky complaints are pant-on-head moronic. Just one example: he complains that in The Phantom Menace when Anakin start piloting the ship he just happens to find a perfectly kids sized space helmet in the wienerpit. But if you actually watch the movie you can see the other pilots wearing those same helmets and they're clearly smaller on their adult faces meaning Anakin is just wearing a regular sized helmet and Mike wasn't paying attention.

        And I think the prequels have issues but a lot of the Plinkett reviews are just mindlessly nitpicking about stuff that's actually explained in the movies/is sorta obvious if you aren't drunk. Don't get me wrong, they're funny but anyone who parrots Mike's opinions like they're their own has the IQ of a brick

        [...]
        Anyone that unironically parrots that fat alcoholic boomer is a low IQ philistine.

        e-celebs wienersuckers should be hanged, drawn and quartered

        Just dropped in to point out you guys have to frame every prequel thread as the movies not being bad and you're still seething about friend simulator videos that came out 15 years ago. If the movies were actually good you would have moved on by now and the eceleb videos wouldn't have got so much traction that they still live rent-free after a decade and a half.

        Cry, seethe, ignore the fact you feel the need to continuously defend them instead of enjoying them. Just remember that you're low IQ for taking Star Wars this seriously in the first place.

        Do with this information what you will.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >If the movies were good you would have moved by now

          Lmfao the utterly backwards logic here. Right anon after all good movies are forgotten and bad ones are eternally memorialized and discussed. Great take!

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >this smol boy?
            >I'M A PERSON AND MY NAME IS ANAKIN
            >check out his midichlorians tho!
            >NOW THAT'S POD RACING! WAHOO!
            >who bro! there's a sith apprentice! might be a conspiracy!
            >let's give dictarorial powers to this guy we're suspicious of! Great idea!
            >good thing this giant army showed up at the same time there's a conspiracy promoting a galatic war!
            >THE JEDI DON'T RESPECT MY POWER LEVEL!
            >I LOVE PADME SO FRICKING MUCH...AS MUCH AS I HATE FRICKING SAND!
            >let's send Anakin to tail the guy we're suspicious of and gave all that power to, even though we sense something off about Anakin and won't let him on the council
            >HE A SITH LORD!
            >padme...will die
            >I BETTER TRUST YOU EVEN THOUGH YOU STARTED THE GALACTIC WAR TO GAIN POWER! BYE BYE "1000 GENERATIONS" OF GOVERNMENT!
            >[murders children]
            >Anakin, I'm your FREN!
            >sperg sperg MUH POWA LEVEL! sperg sperg
            >Anakin...you're breaking my heart!
            >zeeeer ZERRRRRRR zeeeeer [twirling lightsabers]
            >AHHHH! MY ARM! MY LEGS! HATE! HAAAAAAAATEEEEEEE!
            >we can't find anything wrong with her...it appears she died of a...broken heart
            >AND PADME?
            >she told you that you were breaking her heart, bro
            >NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              >all of this reddit text for a 22 year old movie "he doesn't care about", "is bad"

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >the clone army was uncovered while investigating a conspiracy related to the sith/war
                >they literally just go along with this amazing coincidence because they're moronic
                >they all get murdered because the plot needs it to happen
                ...
                >massive conflict spanning thousands of planets all across the galaxy
                >literally going on for decades at this point with millions upon millions of people involved
                >it ends because the plot needs it to (i.e. 3 mins of screentime in which Anakin kills 5 or 6 people)
                ...
                >Anakin trusts Palpatine, a Sith who started a massive war killing millions for the sake of his own power, and betrays the Jedi
                >the excuse is "PADME THO! JEDI DON'T RESPECT MUH POWER LEVEL!"
                >the relationship between Anakin/Padme generates no actual conflict within the plot (the audience is just told "FORBIDDEN ROMANCE!" even though nothing actually inhibits them)
                >the plot is literally just "EMOTIONS ARE CONFUSING AND RELATIONSHIPS CAUSE EMOTIONS!"

                Basically, shit needs to happen in order for the plot to move forward so it does. Sure, there are lots of nonsensical plot holes but this is low-hanging fruit that has been done to death (basically cheap YouTube style criticism). The deeper problem is that the plot isn't being driven by characters in something that has the pretense of being a tragedy; tragedy is specifically character driven as far as that genre goes. You end up with simplistic moron takes from the characters while the plot happens to them and them making decisions that are kind of stupid because the plot simply needs to happen.

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              Anakin can't be a master because he's never sucessfully mentored a padawan. I suspect you have many, many more confusions about the series.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I did and they were a double digit iq take that only a moron would take seriously. JJ, directing starwars, yea that turned out great lol, lmao even

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Yeah but some of nitpicky complaints are pant-on-head moronic. Just one example: he complains that in The Phantom Menace when Anakin start piloting the ship he just happens to find a perfectly kids sized space helmet in the wienerpit. But if you actually watch the movie you can see the other pilots wearing those same helmets and they're clearly smaller on their adult faces meaning Anakin is just wearing a regular sized helmet and Mike wasn't paying attention.

      And I think the prequels have issues but a lot of the Plinkett reviews are just mindlessly nitpicking about stuff that's actually explained in the movies/is sorta obvious if you aren't drunk. Don't get me wrong, they're funny but anyone who parrots Mike's opinions like they're their own has the IQ of a brick

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Mike himself emphasizes in the review that the nitpicks aren't the important part and are just kind of there for fun, the important part is the core structural failures of the trilogy and the handling of Anakin's fall

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          True BUT most of it actually is just nitpicks that are often just wrong if you actually watch the movies. I think some of the core problems he talks about are mostly true but that's like 20% of the reviews. And I generally like RLM but I really don't think the Plinkett reviews hold up 100% anymore (which is why I'm glad they mostly spend their time roasting actual schlock and making jokes these days)

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            This is bait, right?

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              No? Have you watched the reviews lately? A lot of it is literally just complaining about minor shit, some of which is actually explained in the movie.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Nothing you said was really true, do you have autism?

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        If you have working eyeballs, you can literally see that his helmet is a different size. Are you some sort of moron?

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Do you have working eyeballs? If you watch the movie it's clearly a bit too big for him when he puts it on. And if you look at the other (adult) fighters in the scene the helmets clearly fit their heads properly. Sorry these are just youtube screenshots but here's an adult wearing a helmet in that scene...

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            The proportions of the helmet look exactly the same for Anakin, what sort of bait is this? I can't imagine defending the prequels for free like this.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            ...and here's Anakin wearing the same size helmet. Mike was just wrong. I think you might be at the point where you've just seen the Plinkett review more times than you've actually sat down and watched Phantom Menace.

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              Are...are you actually blind my dude?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                No? Sorry again for the shit Youtube quality (this time in crushed 720p quality!) but here's the shot where he puts it on. Look at the size of that thing and the amount of space between the sides of his head and the helmet. It's clearly a bit too big for him. Here's the scene with a timestamp:

                ?t=77

                It's not bait. Mike got something wrong and you've now watched the Plinkett reviews so often you're watching the movie wrong

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Bud, the shit right after this, they have a different helmet prop and THAT prop, in all of the close up shots, fits his head like it's a midget helmet. THIS helmet, in the screencap, is the actual size of the real helmets. They forgot to keep it consistent because they probably thought it being comically oversize would be distracting in the closer footage and not line up the right way.

                I again ask, are you moronic or blind?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Not him but my god you are autistic. this opened my eyes on the state of prequel haters and the kind of mindset you need to have to reach to hate on the prequels.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                I guess the entire planet is autistic except for you then!

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Do you truly believe it's hard to hate these objectively bad movies?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Nah I'm watching the scene right now (found it in better quality too) and in the close-ups the helmet still looks like it's a bit too big for Anakin. Here's the exact time stamp where I got this screenshot from, if I'm missing something here feel free to tell me:

                ?t=105

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Idk how we are still talking about this when you sent two pictures of it literally looking like different props...

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                But...are you blind? It looks like the same prop. Look at the screenshot (apologies for my shitty paint skills) but the gap between the sides of his head and the helmet's still there. Goggles are a bit too big for his face too.

                Again, I think you've watched the Plinkett reviews so often you're now seeing shit in the movie that Mike just imagined

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                He’s a 6 year old going 800 mph. The helmet can’t be too big.

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              This here, is a different helmet than

              No? Sorry again for the shit Youtube quality (this time in crushed 720p quality!) but here's the shot where he puts it on. Look at the size of that thing and the amount of space between the sides of his head and the helmet. It's clearly a bit too big for him. Here's the scene with a timestamp:

              ?t=77

              It's not bait. Mike got something wrong and you've now watched the Plinkett reviews so often you're watching the movie wrong

              This

              Are you a fricking moron, anon? They are two different sizes, literally in the pictures you sent.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                You lost, man
                Stop sucking vodka from Mike's wiener

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                You people have been mocked for 25 straight years, in what way have you ever "won"?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Watch the Rick Worley reviews, they show how RLM are talentless, cinematically illiterate, low IQ morons

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Cope prequelgay

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                I don't think you know how cope works, I got what I want and you didn't

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                You got bad prequel films that almost tanked the franchise?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Nobody knows who that literal who is.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          The proportions of the helmet look exactly the same for Anakin, what sort of bait is this? I can't imagine defending the prequels for free like this.

          >A HELMET RUINED MY CHILDHOOD

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            No. A kiddie sized helmet raped my childhood, thank you very much. See, this totally fits him:

            But...are you blind? It looks like the same prop. Look at the screenshot (apologies for my shitty paint skills) but the gap between the sides of his head and the helmet's still there. Goggles are a bit too big for his face too.

            Again, I think you've watched the Plinkett reviews so often you're now seeing shit in the movie that Mike just imagined

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              >raped my childhood
              What an annoying expression. Your childhood is fricking over Black person.
              Anyone who says this unironically deserves to have fleece johnson go back in time and actually rape them so their bullshit claim can get some substance

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      e-celebs wienersuckers should be hanged, drawn and quartered

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      They're bullshit. The "good character test" gets obliterated by OP without even trying

      >a knight who has taken a vow of celibacy and a noblewoman who is required to project grace and wisdom at all times.

      Random Anon literally understood these kinos better than "professional" critics.

  6. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Natalie Portman's acting is pretty bad and Lucas goes too far in a few places but it's unironically my favorite Star Wars. It's basically a live action cartoon.

  7. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >critical re-evaluation
    Frick yourself homosexual. Plenty of people always liked them

  8. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Based OP.
    Mike "the /druk/" Stoklasa keep malding on suicide watch.
    George is smiling surrounded by his prequelgay frens.
    Huge success!

  9. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Based prequel Chad never watch any of these homosexuals’ reviews

  10. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    no sorry, this just defies any suspension of disbelief. this particular movie is unmitigated dogshit. terrible dialogue, slow, boring, moronic. i can see rehabilitating phantom menace, and i even enjoy revenge of this sith. but youre not going to convince anyone this was good

  11. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Attack of the clones might actually be the best starwars for me

    Its the tightest, most sexy, most violent, most pulp, highest energy starwars ever made

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Honestly you're not even slightly wrong. It's fricking great.

      Yeah even though I still don't love the prequels Lucas is genuinely one of the most interesting and kinda amazing people in the history of Hollywood. That said I'm gonna defend RLM a bit because they were by no means the only - or even first Gen Xers to act like this about the prequels. I find people who blame RLM for the prequel backlash really must've missed the entire 2000s because that shit was everywhere.

      That said Mike recommending JJ Abrams to direct Star Wars movies will never not be funny. But I genuinely don't think it's actually Mike's fault. It's EVERYONE of those Gen Xers who wouldn't stop whining about how George Lucas raped their childhoods for almost 20 years straight

      Correct, but RLM undoubtedly rallied detractors by compiling a handy list of nitpicks in the form of a convenient, readily available series of one-click comedy diatribes. The dissent was there day one, RLM just gave it a single (and wrong) voice.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Factual true. AOTC is ultimate Star Wars kino

  12. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >le bad movie
    >le actually ..good?

  13. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    No frick off. The dialogue is terrible, the pacing is terrible, the story is terrible, the movies assume that you watch the CGI series to know and care for the characters because clearly most of it happened off screen and the series contradict the movies so but they are nearly a separate canon, it's a mess.

  14. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    no, its legitimately awful, just stop

  15. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    The prequels aren't masterpieces and have some structural failings, but are decent enough to make a worthwhile entry to the Star Wars canon. We all wish Anakin's fall to grace would have been handled a little bit better, we all wish some pacing issues would have been solved, but overall it's pretty much ok. That has been my opinion since I've watched them and it didn't change since then.

    In comparison with Disney's trilogy, in particular, yes, the prequels are actually good. In that they extend the source material, present a coherent story, have a plot, characterization and character development. Not the best of those, sure, but they're here.

    People who shat on the prequels for not being masterpieces never really understood how good they had it before Disney. It takes an unnatural, unfiltered turd for them to finally recognize that, yeah, mostly, the prequels are ok.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >In that they extend the source material, present a coherent story, have a plot, characterization and character development
      You can say the same about the sequel trilogy.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        You can, but then you'll be wrong

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          The characters (Rey, Finn, Poe and Kylo) have an arc though.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            the sequel trilogy is not real star wars, only the prequels & the lucas-revised original trilogy (to bring it up to the standard set by the prequels) are the real deal

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous
  16. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    It’s worst film ever like RLM fans say but it is pretty bad all the same.

    Star Wars is space fantasy focusing on high adventure and, yes, some melodrama. It’s one thing when you have Han and Leia doing their thing in Empire, because their relationship stuff happens alongside their adventure fleeing the Empire. That and the two have genuine chemistry.

    What audiences of a space opera don’t want to see is long drawn out scenes of a couple on a peaceful world frolicking in the grass and having a dinner date.

    The tattoo time section was better, but also brought up some plot issues like “why the frick couldn’t they have freed his mom after the events of Phantom Menace. Don’t tell he was busy or that he couldn’t afford it. Kid helped save Naboo, their government could have sent a representative with some money to go buy her freedom in thanks.

    And then you have Detective Obi Wan adventures. Is this what you want out of Star Wars? A Jedi being the most inept investigator ever? A child has to point out that the planet-shaped hole in their records might be a deleted entry in the record? Why even delete the planet when the map shows the hole where a planet once was an any idiot would be able to figure that out?

    Then there’s the clone army. Part of Sidious’s plan. But what would he have done if Obi Wan hadn’t found Kamino? If Jango had successfully killed Padme then gotten away? If Obi Wan had been killed at any point? Or if space diner man hadn’t recognized a kamino saber dart? Sideous knew that Obi Wan had a contact who was an expert in exotic weapons?

    Most of the plot deals with the investigation into one senator’s assassination attempt or a very mismatched couple fumbling their way into love while boring shit happens. The John Carter arena stuff in act 3 approaches Star Wars again but it’s such a slog to get there.

    I could go on but I won’t. Natalie Portman’s tummy was kino, though.

  17. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    The most forgiving thing you can say about the prequels is that you can tell what Lucas was getting at with the Jedi being a flawed institution that in many ways facilitated their own demise. However that's not very well shown at all absent little subtext. That's very much a pacing and time management thing in the story of the whole trilogy where there's almost no time to actually explore that except at the very end basically.
    Like the whole first movie was a waste of time for what it was supposed to narratively accomplish for the series:
    >introduce anakin
    >show the start of palpatine's rise
    Like frick, that could be accomplished in the first act of the movie.
    The second movie was supposed to show anakin's difficulty with the order, but that really comes down to missing his mom and wanting to bang. Those don't highlight much in the way of flaws of the jedi order besides maybe people should get to have relationships. All Dooku has to say is some vague "the jedi are fools" crap.
    The whole first movie should have been young anakin in the first act then his trials as a padawan and difficulties adapting SHOWING the conflicts of the jedi mentality with anyone that hasn't been indoctrinated from a near toddler age.
    If that was the case, the second movie could almost be left the same and it wouldn't matter.
    Also all of the dialogue is garbage and the direction for all of the actors was terrible and led to wooden performances. Even by ROTS Ewan MacGregor is phoning it in and sounds as cringy as the rest.
    Also a reworked Phantom Menace could have had more use of Samuel L Jackson being used effectively. Supposedly his fighting style takes extreme discipline to not risk dark side tendencies. What if anakin saw him being a bad ass mother fricker and tried to emulate him when young and didn't have the early enough training to manage it, bleeding into his behavior later?

  18. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    It's the best prequel

  19. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Andor is better than the Shitquels

  20. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Kill Mike Stoklasa
    Drown Rich Evans
    Execute Jay Batman

    Simple as.

  21. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I never watched a single minute of RLM and never plan to do so.
    They all look like miserable fricks and not the kind you want to listen to,

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      pointless webm

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >t. autist

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >Padme
        >pointless

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          is this hershlag or portman

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Yes

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Based, I don’t take advice from anyone dysgenic. If you are not incredibly intelligent or incredibly sexy you have absolutely zero reason to try and voice your opinion, hence why RLM has been BTFO time and time again. And need I remind you: Space Cop

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >Space Cop
        Uh, you didn't get it, it was SUPPOSED to be boring, unfunny, derivative, poorly acted, poorly made, portray its creators as talentless morons, and be completely unmemorable.

  22. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Yeah, I never got why people hated it. And I wasn't even a kid when I watched it, I was in my late teens. Some parts are dumb, but it's overall really fun.

  23. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Disney star wars is so bad the prequels are pure unadulterated KINO now

  24. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Although I appreciate you taking the time to write that very eloquent and thought out post OP, I disagree. Episode II is the weakest of all six movies, BUT that doesn’t make it a “bad” movie, I’d say it’s above average resting at a comfortable 6/10. The clones are quite cool, but them being clones of a singular person (and just a copy paste of an OT character at that) was a bit weak, as was the second act of the movie. The arena could have been handled much better, even as a kid it wasn’t nearly as exciting as the Battle of Naboo or any of the Episode III fights. Although Anakin and Padme are quite stiff in their acting, they are not only supposed to be teenagers but teenagers that were forced into high stress occupations at an extremely young age so of course they would be quite awkward. I mean most neckbeards on this board wish they had the same level or rizz as “I hate sand”

  25. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    This is terrible movie, and a wonderful mine of ideas and designs for the prequel era. I would never watch it again.

  26. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    based

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      GIWIWGBAFYOATAOT
      (god I wish I was groomed by a fourteen year old at the age of ten)

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Why does this scene have such horrible editing. Its so jagged.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >the way those skirts hug her legs and crotch
        >the transparency of it all

  27. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I don't think the prequels are great but that's only because I also consider the original trilogy to be slightly below average movies, and the prequels of roughly equal quality.
    None of the first six fail to be entertaining though.
    I wish Lucas had gone with the "Jedi wear black" design that was put forth for Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan, Anakin and Luke in their all-black gear are easily the drippiest things in the whole franchise

  28. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    The prequels will never be good. Mike was always right

  29. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Hayden Christianson and Natalie's Portman's acting is fine
    LOL
    It's stiff because the characters are supposed to be stiff
    LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL

    didn't care to read the rest of your blog post

  30. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >With the critical re-evaluation of the prequels going on right now

  31. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    prequels still hold up while sequels are forever forgoteen

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >maul?

  32. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    The prequels are shit and always will be. Redlettermedia was right about everything.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous
      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >prequelgays are unwell
        Many such cases.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Why can't you kids just say you know they are bad and enjoy them anyway? Nobody would care if you were like that.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Why can't you just say hat a movie in a franchise can be good even if you don't like it

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >PLEASE OH PLEASE TELL ME THE MOVIE IS GOOD PLEASE GOD AHHH
            because it's not? You can like bad movies, anon. You'd get a fraction of the hate you do now if you were just non autistic about it

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              Prequelgays are usually underage, yes.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                This meme is incomprehensible to me and I legitimately don't have any idea what it's trying to say.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                It’s making fun of some painting by a israelite where a bunch of blacks are killing whites. Unironically.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            literally how I feel about Rebels
            so many moronic things but I still love everything about it

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >you kids

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Prequelgays are usually underage, yes.

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              the prequels themself aren't even underage anymore

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                What are you trying to argue?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                nothing just bouncing stuff onto you

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              Stop talking to minors, pedo

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >Space Cop
        Uh, you didn't get it, it was SUPPOSED to be boring, unfunny, derivative, poorly acted, poorly made, portray its creators as talentless morons, and be completely unmemorable.

        Gen x are like boomers with self awareness, but instead of not being awful (like boomers) they hide in sarcasm and irony and as a side effect cannot accept or enjoy anything earnest. Truly lost souls.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous
  33. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    didn't read the thread an op to be honest
    episode 2 is better than episode 1 because it has clones and jango and has no kids and jar jar. but it's still a very weak movie

  34. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >STUFF IS C-C-C-COOL!!!
    WHY did R2-D2 intentionally push C-3PO off the ledge in Geonosis? From a character perspective, what was R2's rationale? He had NO reason to believe the hijinks would ensue to get 3PO safely to the ground.

    R2-D2 attempted to MURDER C-3PO. There is NO in-universe explanation other than to get 3PO further into the plot, which the character had no way of knowing. This is dogshit writing.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Nothing in these films make any sense if you use your brain for more than five minutes, it's always just cope.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous
      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        That's my point. The entire PT (and DisneyWars too) is so fricking poorly written, that only addle-brained morons thing they are so great. They are candy-coated slop. Only midwits and morons can "turn their brain off" and most forget to turn it back on.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      R2-D2 is a well established butthole in the franchise

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >R2-D2 is a well established butthole in the franchise
        >HUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!
        Fricking moron reply with a fricking Padme gif for whatever reason. No, you dumb Predditor, R2-D2 in not "a well established butthole" you fricking moron. Go back.

        >this globally well liked and financially successful movie uhhh acshually isn't though because uhhh I didn't make a bait thread about it to post wojacks in
        The absolute fricking state of this board.

        STILL can't grasp that money does not equal QUALITY. Avatar was just one example. Movies that make a lot of money for whatever reason are still not necessarily quality films. I bet you saw Captain Marvel 20+ times in the theater though.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Are you actually trying to argue that Avatar 2 wasn't a great film?

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >prequelgays are very mad and emotionally unstable
          Many. Such. Cases.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >Fricking moron reply with a fricking Padme gif for whatever reason.
          phew

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >imagine being told you are going to be in THREE new Star Wars movies
            >first one, you have maybe 20 minutes of screentime
            >second one you finally get to do things but again, it's like a dozen actual lines and 20 minutes of footage
            >third movie you don't do anything but get pregnant and die

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              any more screen time for padme and you'd be complaining
              there is no reasoning with prequel-haters. they will always have some convoluted reason the prequels are "bad". next they will be saying the prequels were "too good"

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Lol why would I make that argument? She's arguably the most important character fo Anakin's tragedy and I know nothing really about her. She's poorly written. She.wants to frick a kid, is le serious about being a senator, and....well, that's it.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Disgusting. You notice that Hershlag ONLY fell in love with Anakin AFTER he'd told her he genocided an entire village of Sand People, right? What did George mean by that?

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              yes

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Nice acting.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                ?si=_6NP5FReEbiqYzIx&t=8
                >what original troonogy bots want Padme to be doing when the script says "stare pensively"

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                no nose work or brow furrow = staring blankly, not pensively

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                When are we finally admitting she was the weakest actor?

  35. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >The prequels are bad because... le helmet size!
    why are critiques of the prequels always meaningless nerd nonsense you don't even know about unless you read some autistic complaint posted on a phpBB forum in the 2000s
    get real, the prequels miles ahead of "muh space opera" original troonogy

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      get real, the prequels miles ahead of "muh space opera" original troonogy
      real real

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >nobody has ever produced an argument for why the prequels are bad
      The plot to turn the Republic into an Empire doesn't make any logistical sense and it was a mistake to do a time jump between 1 and 2, and the cast, outside of Ewan, is fricking awful.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >The plot to turn the Republic into an Empire doesn't make any logistical sense
        Palpatine wanted to consolidate power for himself indefinitely, and that was the way to do it
        >the cast is bad
        Debunked by the fact that I love them all

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >if I recite the plot then I'll win the argument
          Right, moron...I'm saying his master keikeku doesn't make any sense.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >if i don't understand the plot, i win
            >if you explain the plot in response, you lose
            original troonogy addicts lack honour and virtue, which is why they can't understand anything in the prequel trilogy. all they want is their precious can of 70s star wars and they will always come up with a reason to dismiss the superior, fleshed-out, perfected, jar-jar-topped prequels

  36. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous
  37. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous
  38. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous
    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous
  39. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >Fortnite doing a Star Wars event
    >they put all released skins back in the shop, with the exception of prequel skins (Anakin, Padme and Maul)
    Prequelbros...?

  40. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous
  41. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous
  42. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Episode 2 is the best of the prequels and disney wars all sucks

  43. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    This is peak Star Wars comedy

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous
  44. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I think it's pretty telling that there's multiple threads every single day on this board arguing about the prequels. They are by far the most ambitious and imaginative trilogy. The OT is great especially for its time but is a pretty straight forward fairy tale. The ST is just corporate fanfiction and a crime against cinema that anyone with half a brain rightfully dismisses. But the prequels continue to inspire discussion and debate which has to count for something in and of itself. People can pick apart at the flaws of the trilogy but I believe the whole is greater than the sum of its parts and together the films actually end up greatly enhancing the OT and come together to form a great 6 film saga that works as one long story.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >I think it's pretty telling that there's multiple threads every single day on this board arguing about the prequels.
      It’s the exact same people making the exact same threads with the exact same conversations. They haven’t watched anything else.

  45. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Redditor/critic momentum is huge. Just like TFA undeservedly got called a "classic" in its first month due to sheer momentum, so did this one get immediate hate that had built up after TPM. It's a solid movie. Most of the criticisms leveled against it apply to the OT too, making them kind of a moot point. Don't watch Star Wars if you don't like Star Wars. Only thing I don't like is how digital/CGI ridden it is but I've been suspending my disbelief for a long time with this series, let's not forget the originals were full of claymation and halloween costumes.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      On IMDB for instance, why does Harry Potter schlock, which is objectively more childish/unpolished with worse effects, get a 7.5, while AotC got like a 6.6? Never made any sense. Just a victim of fan debate and bitterness.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Most of the criticisms leveled against it apply to the OT too
      lol no they don't.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        They absolutely do

        >corny/wooden/odd dialogue
        >occasionally distracting FX

        George has his fingerprints all over every single movie from 1-6. You either like it or you don't, it was never "serious cinema" it's wild and entertaining.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >the absolute cope
          Lol nobody ever levies the same criticisms the PT gets on the OT because the OT had substance and a working style the prequels don't so be moronic if you want nothing you ever say is going to retroactively make the prequels less stupid.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            You're spouting buzzwords. There is no magical "substance" to the OT. It is sci fi space opera movies for autistic boys aged 5-18, just like the PT. Everyone else is a tourist. I'm not moronic you're just a lemming midwit that can't conceive of original thought.

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              >angry prequelgay doesn't understand what "substance" means in context
              why are you people so embarrassingly moronic about these prequel movies? Substance as in story, pacing and overall execution. As a non-autistic adult, I can look at what these two trilogies tried to do and conclude that they are not of equal quality to each other. Is the dialogue in Empire a bit stifled? Yeah, it's not as wooden as ANH, is it Attack of the Clones moronic with syntax and delivery? No, of course it isn't.

              have a nice day moron. The prequels are never magically going to transform into good movies just because you are desperate for validation.

              Laughing at you as always.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                haha you got filtered

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >F-F-FILTERED!!!

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                You just keep exposing yourself for just not understanding and literally not being a fan, who gives a frick. Keep whining, I'll keep watching whenever I feel like it like I always have lol.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >WAHH WAHHH WAHHH YOU JUST DONT UNDERSTAND IT! WAHH WAHHH
                stay mad, brainlet. The prequels don't make any sense to anyone over 12.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >exposed himself being a midwit again
                These emotionally compromised morons hating Lucas are genuinely dumber than Black folk

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                It's 2024. It's been 22 years. You are still in threads trying to convince people that they don't like what they like. The absurd one is you, homosexual.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Why do 12-year-olds have a better understanding of a film than you do?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >is the movie dumb? No, you just "don't understand it"
                Explain the Trade Federation without just reciting the plot to me, explain what they get out of joining the CIS, and hard mode: you can't bring up the television shows or wookipedia. Has to be information from the movie.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                The republic is the only real check on their power and is already on thin ice over the Naboo incident. The Trade Federation has an enormous private military, much of the galaxy's wealth and is doing corporate colonial shenanigans like forcing planets to sign monopoly agreements and blockading planets. With the galaxy split up into smaller political units, and having a seat at the table in the new separatist organization, it will be able to expand and have more influence in general over galactic trade.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                In the Phantom Menace, they were protesting the taxation of trade routes. They want less government oversight and they teamed up with a bunch of other corporations to make their own government.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Perhaps you didn't understand the stipulation I offered, are you ESL?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >without just reciting the plot
                You also didn't answer the question; why do they join the CIS?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Perhaps you didn't understand the stipulation I offered, are you ESL?

                Attempting to frame an argument in such a way that makes any response impossible is pretty lazy, my friend. The plot point about protesting taxes reveals their motivation: they want the government to stay out of their business. Joining the CIS allows them and the other corporations to shape their own governement however they want.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Nothing that happens on Naboo had anything to do with the formation of the CIS from the perspective of the Trade Federation, so I again ask your autistic fricking ass, why do they join?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                You were already given an answer

                The republic is the only real check on their power and is already on thin ice over the Naboo incident. The Trade Federation has an enormous private military, much of the galaxy's wealth and is doing corporate colonial shenanigans like forcing planets to sign monopoly agreements and blockading planets. With the galaxy split up into smaller political units, and having a seat at the table in the new separatist organization, it will be able to expand and have more influence in general over galactic trade.

                but you don't like it so you keep hammering on about the Phantom Menace being unrelated when not only is it related, in Attack of the Clones it's revealed that at the time of the Phantom Menace, "The Senate" (Palpatine) ordered the creation of a clone army while precipitating a war through Dooku with the trade federation.

                The surprise of the republic having an enormous army to counter the trade federation's drone army makes the outbreak of war possible in the first place because wars only break out when there's incomplete information and one side overestimates their own power and underestimate their opponent's power. When there is a parity of forces, war doesn't break out because they don't think they will be able to force their way.

                The Trade Federation joins the CIS and commits their military because they believe it puts them in a position of power be able to dictate the new rules of trade for the galaxy. The secessionists are the outbreak of the war are depicted as rising in popularity with the Republic being on their back foot and likely at a disadvantage if war is going to break out.

                Of course you have to ignore all of the worldbuilding and allusions to political history and the history of cinema and the Aristotelian cyclical development of politics in order to make this argument because you're a moronic manchild that's never read any history and have never been exposed to high culture.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                NTA but it's absolutely moronic that they'd employee an army that falls into their lap (which is a plot contrivance in and of itself) because they were investigating a conspiracy. Lucas expects his audience not to think about it because he tells them what to think at every turn instead of letting character drive plot.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >Aristotelian cyclical development of politics
                You've never read Aristotle and are merely repeating what you've heard others say because you think it sounds intelligent. FYI: that stuff started as an ironic meme (i.e. making the prequels sound like they have depth in order to mock them ala this pasta

                Lucas is a master of multi-layered storytelling and this has to be taken into account when viewing the prequels. Just look at this scene--its short but there is so much going on! You have to understand how this scene on an archetypical level--the natural nature of digestion vs. power draining machines. But there's still so much more. You see, in the EU it's explained that this animal is actually owned by a man named Zeeboo Beeboo who had been misfeeding it prior to the events we see in TPM. Coincidentally--he looks a little like Jar Jar and therefore, via this subtle foreshadowing via flatulence, we see the revolutionary embers that will spark the fire of a rebellion (what a set up!). But wait, there's even more at work here! What can be interpreted as a simple fart joke is actually a direct echo of Luke/Leia's incestuous kiss (you have to be familiar with Ring theory to truely understand this). But given the archetypal nature/machine dichotomy and the hidden performative protest of the animal's fart, which deftly signals to the audience the coming of rebellion, we see the brother/sister kiss as the symbolic act of defiance against a hegemonic empire! Remember that scene where Jar Jar stepped in poo-poo? Foreshadowing of the trouble to come. BRAVO LUCAS!

                Lucas is a genius who layers his films so they work on multiple levels. Please like and subscribe for more fart sniffing videos.

                ) and prequelgays were too dumb to pick up on the irony and started quoting them.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                God you are fricking moronic.

                >but you don't like it so you keep hammering on about the Phantom Menace being unrelated
                Correct, virtually nothing that happens in that film has any bearing on the rest of the trilogy, the crisis on Naboo doesn't even become the catalyst for why the Trade Federation goes full autist and dedicates their entire financial power and manufacturing to the CIS outside of "Nute is big mad about Padme". Which also doesn't make sense, she's not a fricking queen anymore. Really his gripe should still be with the Naboo government not the entire Republic lol a Republic that apparently arrested him and then just idk, let him go.
                >blah blah reciting the plot blah blah
                I don't think you truly understand what I'm asking you to do, you might be intellectually stunted; I'm asking you explain the "why" of the plot, which you aren't. I saw the movie homosexual, I know what the movie is TELLING me. It is conflicting with how I'm not 5 and I have a logic center in my brain and can reason that the movie doesn't make sense. This is a surefire example that you have autism btw.
                >The surprise of the republic having an enormous army to counter the trade federation's drone army makes the outbreak of war possible in the first place because wars only break out when there's incomplete info
                The Trade Fed learns about the clones on Geonosis, why their response after learning this fact is to go balls in with the CIS is beyond me, the movie doesn't explain what their motivation would continue to be since their goals are met at that point and really staying with the CIS just serves to bleed money. The movie doesn't explain it because it doesn't have an answer.
                >The Trade Federation joins the CIS and commits their military because they believe it puts them in a position of power

                Be cool if we were shown literally any of that. Maybe you could send me a YouTube link of the fricking scene where we see this be explained in literally ANY meaningful way.

                Cont.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Dude, prequelgays will always repeat plotbeats back to you while ignoring your criticism of them. They're too dumb to understand why the movies don't make sense and will just repeat what the plot said. They only have the ability to understand things at a surface level--this is why they started unironically quoting memes that were making fun of them by pretending they had depth, lol.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >You’re such a fricking moron
                >Correct
                >Correct
                >Correct

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Cont.

                >Of course you have to ignore all of the worldbuilding and allusions to political history
                Correct, because it's not mentioned in the fricking movie at all.
                >and the history of cinema and the Aristotelian cyclical development of politics in order to make this argument because you're a moronic manchild that's never read any history and have never been exposed to high culture.
                Oh Christ, fricking have a nice day it's not that deep. You have no clue what you are talking about.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                As I said, their goal is less government oversight (as exemplified by their actions in TPM). Their goal hasn't changed in AotC, and joining the CIS accomplishes their goal.

                I would really prefer to stop repeating myself as if this is not a sufficient answer.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Ok and how does that accomplish their goals and where do you see that in the movies you fricking dip?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >how does seceding from the Galactic Republic to make their own government accomplish their goal of no longer having to do what the Galactic Republic says

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                ...right, because they don't get a say while in the CIS, they are expected to commit all their resources and just lose money in war with a Republic they really shouldn't have a gripe with

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Call it an investment

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                blessed image.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                HACK

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Go on, substantiate your statement.

                What are the meaningful differences between the story themes, archetypes, plot beats etc, between AOTC and ESB?

                What makes you prefer one over the other?

                Why is the pacing superior in ESB compared to AOTC? Can you point to a
                Specific part of the movie that stood out in that sense?

                about the overall execution, I'll let you decide how to answer that one, because there's really a myriad of ways to pose that question.

                Go on, you have 30 minutes or your posting license is revoked.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >prequelgays are this desperate for arguments
                nah.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >Comment too long.

                Weak, pathetic and cowardly escape attempts
                >eeeehhh I'm too fricking cool to have an argument
                Yeah, you pretend. Dickless homosexuals

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Go on, substantiate your statement.

                What are the meaningful differences between the story themes, archetypes, plot beats etc, between AOTC and ESB?

                What makes you prefer one over the other?

                Why is the pacing superior in ESB compared to AOTC? Can you point to a
                Specific part of the movie that stood out in that sense?

                about the overall execution, I'll let you decide how to answer that one, because there's really a myriad of ways to pose that question.

                Go on, you have 30 minutes or your posting license is revoked.

                Aww you know what? Sure! Let's make you feel really dumb.

                >meaningful differences
                Well, the big one is character development and character roles. Luke, Han, Leia C3P0, they aren't complicated but they serve character roles that work for what the flash Gordon homage is trying to BE. I know what Luke wants/desires/fears. I understand him because he's very easy and relatable. Who fricking knows what Padme wants? "I can't have sex because I'm a senator", ok...what does that mean? It's not explored at all. The disservice of these prequel characters is that it's assuming a more complex narrative but without offering the audience any sort of real explanation into the "why" these characters believe what they do and act how they do. Kenobi is another example in the prequels. Other than just being told to go on an investigation, what does he offer? He doesn't give any insight, he doesn't say anything about his adventures that we get to learn.

                That's the best example: OT is show don't tell. PT is tell don't show.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >I need exposition dumps every 10 minutes to understand the plot

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                That's not what I said you fricking moron, do you people have any understanding of how to construct a narrative where you learn about characters without them standing looking at the camera and reciting their feelings?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >literally say the exact opposite about expositions
                >prequelgay is having a sperg fit and can't even read
                The entire prequel trilogy is one info dump after the other, what is wrong with your brain and reasoning skills?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Prequelgays will spell out plotbeats that were directly told to the audience as if you missed them because they can't understand why the writing is bad.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >OT is show don't tell. PT is tell don't show.
                Its genuinely the other way around.
                Anakin and Obi wan's relation is told through action and context.
                Why anakin feels like he does about Padme, and ultimately how he arrived at his political leanings and dreams is told through implications and context, never stated outright.

                Same with Padme, you get shown a masterclass of understanding of female psychology without the attraction never being spelled out.

                Action is always the driver in AOTC.
                When Obi wan and Anakin are quarreling in a semi-brotherly way yet increasingly passive aggressive towards one another, ending in Obi wan and anakin one-upping each other, with anakin chafing in the dynamic, that's characterization.

                When we see obiwan having a chat with dex, that's also characterization for his relation with anakin.

                When we Padme nurturing anakin after he admitted to a small genocide, that's characterization for *her*
                And so on

                You simply refuse to watch the thing is your problem

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Holy shit this is too autistic and wrong to not be bait

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                How is it wrong tho dickhole

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >When we see obiwan having a chat with dex, that's also characterization for his relation with anakin.
                Anakin is not even remotely brought up in that scene, what on earth are you talking about? How do you learn anything about Anakin through that scene? What the actual frick are you talking about? They talk about the dart and Kamino, there's literally nothing else that happens in that scene.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Anakin literally just says, multiple times, what his beliefs are. What the frick are you talking about?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >Anakin and Obi wan's relation is told through action and context.
                No it isn't. There's literally an exposition dump where they talk about their previous adventures and I don't recall a single scene of Obi Wan training him. There's not even any mentoring scenes...just arguments that make Anakin seem like a petulant moron instead of a tragic figure whose hubris ends up destroying him. Terrible writing.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                holy midwit.

  46. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Everyone who hates AotC just hasn't seen it recently.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Also crazy how all of the garbage coming out now just makes everything from the 2000s mature well automatically. We didn't know how good we had it.

  47. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    The prequels *specifically ep 1 in particular, are so kino. I'm tired of ptetending it's not.

    went to go see phantom menace with the bros yesterday. so kino

  48. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    SAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY IT -

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I have nothing to say, I've always stood by george, with all his flaws

  49. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    This movie probably aged better than globohomosexual goyslop they called "movies" from 2010 and on, but yeah let's trust the opinion of some random fatty who thinks JJ Abrams is a genius.

  50. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    The PT movies fail on many different levels.

    For the Phantom and Clones the pacing is absolutely atrocious. You have these long boring slogs in the middle of both of them. Anakin, the main focus of the 3 films, didn't become an interesting character until the 3rd one. Padme was never an interesting or likeable character either. For ATOC specifically, there interactions between Padme and Anakin take up a lot of screen time... There's no equivalent to this in the OT. When Han woos Leia it's usually in the middle of the plot moving forward. Like how he's flirting with her while going through the 1000-1 asteroid run or about to be frozen in carbonite.

    Another poster alluded to this also but Lucas didn't properly convey the actual issue with the Jedi. So the whole, 'Jedi need to change because they lost their way' thing didn't rally connect with me.

    That being said what did the PT do right? World building and memorable characters. The PT made the universe feel bigger and alive. So many great characters too like Qui Gon, Dooku, expansion of Palpatine etc... The overall story wasn't bad either. The execution of it, at times, was not great.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >You have these long boring slogs in the middle of both of them
      AOTC is by far the least boring of all movies

      Shit happens literally every single scene. Meanwhile in ESB you have a middle that consists of the Falcon flying around aimlessly, breaking down and getting fixed while Luke jumps around in a swamp.

      Its a movie with an exceedingly drab middle part, and yet you subhumans keep sucking that movies dick while posting moronic takes like this.

      Tell me, in what way is AOTC any way worse than ESB, pacing wise.

      Any romance scene is offset by Obi wan detective adventures,'you need to remember this fact

      Fricking donkey

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >Comment too long.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        You have dogshit taste. The asteroid chase is one of the best scenes in the entire franchise. The dynamic between Han-3p0-Leia on the falcon was fantastic and entertaining unlike the dogshit scenes with Anakin and Padme. I can't emphasis enough how bad of taste you actually have for that comment.

        Similarly Yoda from empire was one of the best characters ever created. Absolutely iconic. All his parts come from the middle of empire strikes back which you call 'exceedingly drab middle' compared to ATOC. I really hope you are trolling.

        It's not like the Obi Wan detective adventure was all that great either.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          The argument you posted boils down to "it wasn't ESB, the shittiest of all starwars, and therefore bad"
          >"yoda from the height of his institutional power and arrogance, should be the same character as the senile dwarf he became at his lowest"

          Think about yoda really hard. Do you think maybe George lucas had a *point* in portraying yoda in a way totally inverted to his "real" self?
          Do you think that maybe he's showing us something inherently wrong, and amiss going on?

          Yoda, in this movie, is one of the key players in kicking off a giant war, one that will ultimately doom the jedi.

          Think about that

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            No, I'm explaining why you are moronic.

            >>"yoda from the height of his institutional power and arrogance, should be the same character as the senile dwarf he became at his lowest"

            I never once mentioned this as an argument. I mentioned Yoda had his iconic and best characterization in the middle of ESB which you labeled part of "an exceedingly drab middle".

            Here's the big issue with ATOC and the prequels in general. The over arcing story is fine. They aren't great movies. The characters aren't as good. Their chemistry isn't close to as good. The dialogue is worse. There's no iconic twist like the end of ESB. There's really bad scenes from TPM and ATOC that have no equivalent in the OT. These are all the little things that make up a good individual movies. Empire Strikes Backs has so much going, it is largely considered one of the best movies ever, not just star wars movies. Attack of the Clones is considered a bad movie for the reasons I listed. Not just a bad star wars movie but not a great movie in general. It really only works if you like the over arching story of star wars. Then you can get past all the shitty elements and enjoy it as a mediocre/bad piece of larger story.

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              >The over arcing story is fine.
              NTA and it really isn't, anon. The plot threads don't make sense with one another and the tragedy is dictated by plot, which is told to the audience instead of developed, and not character arcs.

  51. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Episode 2 is straight up garbage. You are an imbecile

  52. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    My favorite of the prequels aside from Hayden and Nat, their "romance" was poorly acted in ROTS too but there's less of it

  53. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Why doesn't somebody "remake" the PT but good?

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Smartest thing George did was let someone else make SW media and show us just how bad it could get

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I don't even mean starwars, just a fantasy movie that follows the same beats but gets them right and fixes the shit parts. You could take Spenser's Faerie Queene and loosely drape it over the PT plot and get something really cool.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >I don't even mean starwars, just a fantasy movie that follows the same beats but gets them right and fixes the shit parts.
          The parts of the PT that make it memorable and satisfying are the parts that people are in here complaining about. "Whenever people are talking instead of fighting it's boring", "the politics are confusing", "why did this happen instead of something that would kill the narrative?"

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >The parts of the PT that make it memorable and satisfying
            Kid anakin? Jar jar?

            >the clone army was uncovered while investigating a conspiracy related to the sith/war
            >they literally just go along with this amazing coincidence because they're moronic
            >they all get murdered because the plot needs it to happen
            ...
            >massive conflict spanning thousands of planets all across the galaxy
            >literally going on for decades at this point with millions upon millions of people involved
            >it ends because the plot needs it to (i.e. 3 mins of screentime in which Anakin kills 5 or 6 people)
            ...
            >Anakin trusts Palpatine, a Sith who started a massive war killing millions for the sake of his own power, and betrays the Jedi
            >the excuse is "PADME THO! JEDI DON'T RESPECT MUH POWER LEVEL!"
            >the relationship between Anakin/Padme generates no actual conflict within the plot (the audience is just told "FORBIDDEN ROMANCE!" even though nothing actually inhibits them)
            >the plot is literally just "EMOTIONS ARE CONFUSING AND RELATIONSHIPS CAUSE EMOTIONS!"

            Basically, shit needs to happen in order for the plot to move forward so it does. Sure, there are lots of nonsensical plot holes but this is low-hanging fruit that has been done to death (basically cheap YouTube style criticism). The deeper problem is that the plot isn't being driven by characters in something that has the pretense of being a tragedy; tragedy is specifically character driven as far as that genre goes. You end up with simplistic moron takes from the characters while the plot happens to them and them making decisions that are kind of stupid because the plot simply needs to happen.

            Episode 1 should have been clone war and clone war should have been doppeganger conspiracy

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              >Creates a background for why Vader is an excellent pilot
              >Podracing in the style of Ben Hur
              >Anti-slavery message
              >Jar Jar is clumsy, cringe and stupid like all kids are until they mature, which is a part of his character arc which later gets exploited by Palpatine
              You're not paying attention to the movies nearly enough to understand what people like about them.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                We didn't need to see Luke as a child for background on why he's an excellent pilot. Anti-slavery message is cringe.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                in the style of Ben Hur
                Lol, when anons pointed out to you it was a ripoff of Ben Hur you incorporated mention of it to deflect.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >Rip off
                It was an intentional allusion, the 6 films are full of them.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >all of Lucas's films ripoff other movies
                Lol, no shit. Pretending it's an homage and not copy/paste because Lucas is a fraud doesn't make it better you absolute moron.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                You seem angry over fantasy muppet films lol
                get over it.
                Go burn down a zionist office building instead, ya pussy.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Says the guy in a forever war trying to convince people smarter than he is that shitty CG cartoon films are high art. Lol

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >Why doesn't someone remake the PT but with bullet time, gore, breasts and ass, swearing, space gangsters, excessively over-the-top acting and a simple plot which I can understand? Oh and bring Boba Fett back

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I haven't liked boba fett since I was 10.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        We have pretenders in our midst. Why do people pretend to like Star Wars but not actually like what Star Wars is about? It's puzzling. They need to frick off back to Futurama or whatever the hell else.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          I see no Last Jedi fans here

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            I can guarantee they are a cuck couple

  54. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Lucas is a master of multi-layered storytelling and this has to be taken into account when viewing the prequels. Just look at this scene--its short but there is so much going on! You have to understand how this scene on an archetypical level--the natural nature of digestion vs. power draining machines. But there's still so much more. You see, in the EU it's explained that this animal is actually owned by a man named Zeeboo Beeboo who had been misfeeding it prior to the events we see in TPM. Coincidentally--he looks a little like Jar Jar and therefore, via this subtle foreshadowing via flatulence, we see the revolutionary embers that will spark the fire of a rebellion (what a set up!). But wait, there's even more at work here! What can be interpreted as a simple fart joke is actually a direct echo of Luke/Leia's incestuous kiss (you have to be familiar with Ring theory to truely understand this). But given the archetypal nature/machine dichotomy and the hidden performative protest of the animal's fart, which deftly signals to the audience the coming of rebellion, we see the brother/sister kiss as the symbolic act of defiance against a hegemonic empire! Remember that scene where Jar Jar stepped in poo-poo? Foreshadowing of the trouble to come. BRAVO LUCAS!

    Lucas is a genius who layers his films so they work on multiple levels. Please like and subscribe for more fart sniffing videos.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      The character of Jar Jar is supposed to be someone with childlike naivete that's clumsy and makes mistakes and grows over time. But his naivete is preyed upon by more sophisticated political actors to take power. He plays the role of the useful idiot. All the comic relief moments are made better by his character's arc.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Anakin can't be a master because he's never sucessfully mentored a padawan. I suspect you have many, many more confusions about the series.

        >prequelgay spells out basic shit absolutely no one missed while injecting some head canon he heard from another prequelgay in order to make it seem deep
        Imagine my surprise here! Lol!

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          > while injecting some head canon
          That's called analysis and opinion.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            In what way does the movie(s) depict him as the useful idiot? What am I forgetting?

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              Jar Jar's naivete and desire to be a wise legislator is preyed upon by Palpatine in the scene where Obi Wan transmits his findings to Corusant from Geonosis before being captured by Dooku. Jar Jar is the senator who proposes giving Palpatine emergency powers that amount to a dictatorship in order to resolve the crisis that Palpatine himself precipitated.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >Jar Jar as an allegory for how authoritarians use blacks as useful idiots

                damn George

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Palpatine is George Soros

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                When does Jar Jar express his desire to be a wise senator? I understand he is the one that proposes the legislation but doesn't that make the entire senate useful idiots for approving it? Is everyone in the PT a useful idiot? I guess they aren't useful, but EVERY CHARACTER is a fricking moron which is why the movies are dumb. Because it doesn't make any sense that that many people would be that stupid. The previous anon saying that prequel defenders just reciting plots and injecting whatever cope they need to is continuing to be proven true. I think there's an entire chapter of the RLM reviews that is titled "Is everyone blind AND stupid?" Once again proving the reviews to be correct.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Two places, one when Padme goes to Naboo for her protection and when Palpatine suggests to Jar Jar that Padme would do what Jar Jar ends up doing.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            If you have any other confusions I'll help you out with them. You could probably just re-watch them now that you're older and you won't miss as much.

            >"analysis"
            >misses things like the forbidden romance not actually being forbidden, employing a clone army you found investigating those conspiring against you, the galactic war simply evaporating when the plot needs it to, Anakin just going along with the guy who started said galactic war to gain power and murdering kids
            >DURRRRRRRRRRR
            LOL!

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              >sith going along with the guy who started said galactic war to gain power
              yes. that is a textbook play for a sith. Why are you confused?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >MY POWER LEVEL!
                >CAN YOU NOT SEE MY INNER CONFLICT!
                >the relationship with Padme could be a source of conflict...
                >NO! IT'S FRICKING ROMANTIC! WE SAID IT'S FORBIDDEN AND THAT'S ENOUGH! NO ONE WILL NOTICE! WE'RE TELLING YOU HOW TO FEEL ABOUT THIS!
                >she may have saved him...
                >CAN'T YOU SEE HOW FRICKING TRAGIC THIS IS? MY EYES CHANGED COLOUR!
                >force chokes Padme
                >while giving birth she...died of a broken heart
                >THIS IS TRAGEDY!

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                other than the dildo sword that's a cool design.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                When you phrase all your confusion in moron speak it makes it hard to parse. It almost makes it seem as if you don't know how/why jedi are forbidden to love.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >prequelgay is dumb enough to enjoy the prequels and is therefore too stupid to understand why they're terribly written even when it's spelled out for him
                Imagine my surprise!

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Anon every single dislike you've pointed out of the shows has just been you not understanding what you watched.
                >NO! IT'S FRICKING ROMANTIC! WE SAID IT'S FORBIDDEN AND THAT'S ENOUGH!
                Do you not know why jedi are forbidden to love individuals?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Sorry prequelgay, no time to talk. It was my gf's bday this week and I have to get ready to meet her to take her out to dinner. Have fun watching Jar Jar and staying in on a Friday night discussing Star Wars. Lol!

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                I'd be surprised if you had ever even watched these shows. I thought you were 50~60 and that was the source of your unnatural hatred but it would seem you're underage by the way you conduct yourself.

                You should watch the movies anon. If you like lucas films you'll like them. If you don't like lucas films you have no need to ever go into a thread about lucas films...

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          If you have any other confusions I'll help you out with them. You could probably just re-watch them now that you're older and you won't miss as much.

  55. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    The "falling in love" scenes are pretty poor (and with lucas' track record of horrible dialogue and never having done a good love story, that's not surprising) but the movie as a whole is good.

  56. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Why did Obi make a phone call in the pouring rain? Was he moronic?

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      It always rains there because it's an ocean planet with atmosphere.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      he didn't want ayylmaos to eavesdrop on him dummy

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        well now he has to sit in wet robes all the way to the bug planet. are there no space umbrellas?

  57. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >With the critical re-evaluation of the prequels going on right now
    Very bad acting, very bad story (even for a children movie).

    The only cool and iconic scene:

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >simply parroting RLM
      Not gonna work, homosexual lol

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >RLM
        I don't even know who the frick is that

  58. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Marx, Karl Marx

  59. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >foul-smelling Jeet thread

    You reek of shit, Jeet.

  60. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I saw it 3 times in the cinema. It's my favorite of the prequels.

  61. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    ur arguing against a bunch of straw men that exist in your imagination. the awful acting and chemistry between Portman and christiansan is obvious. it has nothing to do with being "stiff" it's straight up shit dialogue and performances.

    the arena was not cool. the cg clones were not cool. you know what's cool? Christopher Lee. I wish he was in the movie more and directly involved in anakins corruption and was the most charismatic likeable sith ever

  62. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    The stench of Jeet is overpowering.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      We saw and ignored your low quality bait the first time thanks

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >We
        >Jeet thinks he is multiple people

        To be fair, it is hard to believe such a foul stench could be generated by one person.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          prequelgays are known schizophrenics

  63. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    why would blockading an entire planet be "perfectly legal"? Why was invasion necessary?

  64. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Ignore the bots disagreeing, you're correct.

  65. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Put a cork in it Jeet.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      You seem upset, Jeet.

      >sequelgay trying to make this a race issue
      You know sequelgays are desperate when they try to call racists for help LOL

  66. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    The reveal that R2 could fly all this time is an underrated contender for the single stupidest moment of the prequels

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      it’s a fantasy film.
      try growing up and solving real world problems if you don’t like the make believe rules in fantasy fictional setting

  67. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    What religion does the priest who marries Ani and Padme at the end of AOTC belong to?

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >the two star-crossed lovers were married[4] during sunset[1] at Varykino, a lake retreat in Lake Country on Naboo,[3] as a private yet simple ceremony. When the two presented themselves to him,[7] the union was officiated by a holy man from the region[8] with respect for ancestral traditions
      >Varykino
      >very kino
      holy pottery!

  68. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >only jeets like ai
    that forced meme failed, so now it's
    >only jeets like the prequels
    What's the deal with the lack of creativity kek. back in my day trolling was a art.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      You seem upset, Jeet.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I'm Whiter than you'd be if a Genie fulfilled your wish to be human, anon.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          I am unfamiliar with your backwards religion, Jeet. These "genies" are like your gods?

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >444
            Nice. Instead of replying to your boring jeet stuff, I'll post something funny. Thanks for the 444.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >only jeets like ai
      not true. So do gypos, israelites, igbo, armenians and other scamming cultures.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >jeets, gypos, israelites, igbo, armenians
        Same thing

  69. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    What is the worst of the six then?

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Return of the Jedi

  70. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    great post

  71. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    PREQUELJEETS REJOICE

  72. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >woke Doctor Who is dead
    >woke Star Wars is dead
    >woke Marvel is dead
    >Seething woketards are losing on every front

  73. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    The cheesy romance dialogue is purposefully melodramatic. Lucas's inspiration for star wars is flash gordon

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >the bad writing was on purpose
      Holy cope.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        It's not bad writing, it's pulpy and deliberately melodramatic. Would you rather they all speak like mid2000s valley girls? It's set a long time ago in a Galaxy far far away.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Why can't you just be ok with the fact it's bad writing?

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Compared to modern blockbusters and MCU movies, it's Shakespeare

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              Lol, no it isn't. MCU shit is by the numbers writing whereas the prequels are a complete mess that can't colour in the lines.

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              >The Phantom Menace is better than Guardians 3

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >It's not bad writing
          It's objectively bad dialogue and the overall writing of the films is terrible. Prequelgays will never understand this though because they're moronic enough to enjoy the prequels in the first place.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Imagine Anakin crashing Flash Gordon’s Hawkman Rocket Cycle into the Jedi temple, just to drive the war on terrorism imagery further home

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >war on terrorism imagery
        You can't explain how the movies are allegory beyond surface level connections that are so loose they could be applied to pretty much any movie.

  74. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >detective subplot is cool.

    detective obi-wan on kamino is pure kino

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      You like the idea of it, not the execution.

  75. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >1. Democratically elected monarch.
    This was solely done because Lucas wanted Leia to be a real princess and was reaching for surface level themes about democracy. It's moronic.
    >2. She's a teenager.
    This was only done because Lucas had to restrict the age gap between Padme and Anakin. It's moronic.
    >3. Elected leader of an entire planet but no one recognizes her.
    Lucas did this because his audience is stupid and won't notice it. He wanted a cliched plot twist that depends on the fact the audience are morons.
    >inb4: elected monarchs existed
    They weren't children.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >They weren't children.
      Amidala was literally inspired by child queen Kumali from Nepal. Her clothes were inspired by mongolian and Nepali queens.

      https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kumari_(goddess)

      Don't get mad, you're just ignorant.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >1. Democratically elected monarch.
        This was solely done because Lucas wanted Leia to be a real princess and was reaching for surface level themes about democracy. It's moronic.
        >2. She's a teenager.
        This was only done because Lucas had to restrict the age gap between Padme and Anakin. It's moronic.
        >3. Elected leader of an entire planet but no one recognizes her.
        Lucas did this because his audience is stupid and won't notice it. He wanted a cliched plot twist that depends on the fact the audience are morons.
        >inb4: elected monarchs existed
        They weren't children.

        forgot pic. Taboo is a fictional ancient culture in a sci fi movie about space wizards. Earth cultutes have had way more ridiculous forms of leadership than fictional Naboo had.

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >ignores the fact Padme is an actual wartime leader and not merely a figurehead (this is why being a teenager doesn't make sense)
        >ignores the fact no one recognizes her even though she's elected
        Lol, moron.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >The people of Naboo often elected young women, believing they possessed a form of pure, childlike wisdom that the adults lacked. Theoretically, however, virtually anyone could be elected the new king or queen.

          It's Naboo's moronic culture that is to blame. It shows the dangers of libtardism- their namby pamby belief system allowed them to easily be invaded by the first faction who tried it.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >inserting headcanon outside the films in order to make what's on screen make sense
            No, moron. They elected a teenager because Lucas needed to decrease the age gap. They made her a monarch because Lucas wanted Leia to be an actual princess. They couldn't recognize the elected leader of an entire planet because Lucas wanted a plot twist.

            This is bad writing.

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              That's your head canon, moron. It's not my fault you aren't able to understand very simple movies made for children

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >1. Democratically elected monarch.
        This was solely done because Lucas wanted Leia to be a real princess and was reaching for surface level themes about democracy. It's moronic.
        >2. She's a teenager.
        This was only done because Lucas had to restrict the age gap between Padme and Anakin. It's moronic.
        >3. Elected leader of an entire planet but no one recognizes her.
        Lucas did this because his audience is stupid and won't notice it. He wanted a cliched plot twist that depends on the fact the audience are morons.
        >inb4: elected monarchs existed
        They weren't children.

        #
        forgot pic. Naboo is a fictional ancient culture in a sci fi movie about space wizards. Earth cultures have had way more ridiculous forms of leadership than fictional Naboo had.

        >ignores the fact Padme is an actual wartime leader and not merely a figurehead (this is why being a teenager doesn't make sense)
        >ignores the fact no one recognizes her even though she's elected
        Lol, moron.

        When she came in to power Naboo was a peaceful planet with no weapons, based around art and culture. Senator Palpatine had more power than her, you are correct. That's literally a plot point in the Phantom Menace

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          >Earth cultures have had way more ridiculous forms of leadership than fictional Naboo had
          The fact nonsensical things exist isn't an argument that voting a teenager to be your planetary ruler, complete with actual functional duties and the fact no one recognizes her because the plot wants to have a twist, isn't dumb.
          >When she came in to power Naboo was a peaceful
          This is not said in the plot and is an example of a prequelgay inserting headcanon in order to make things make sense. Again, she was an actual leader and performed functional duties. Simple as.

          • 4 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Nepal has literal child queens. Why can't fictional Naboo have child queens? Even China has had child emperors who wielded actual power, and that's the biggest nation on Earth.
            Also Naboo's idiotic government is shown to be weak and idiotic in the movies.

            And on another note it's not like the shitshow USA has going with senate, congress and President is any better than what Naboo has going on. Naboo seems like a much nicer place to live than Earth, when it isn't under blockade from the trade federation. Naboo got punished for trusting the system and the galactic senate and for having weak leadership and no self defense. It's a kep point in the movie. They needed the gungan military to save the day at the end because they had no military themselves due to their dumb form of government

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              >inserting headcanon outside the films in order to make what's on screen make sense
              No, moron. They elected a teenager because Lucas needed to decrease the age gap. They made her a monarch because Lucas wanted Leia to be an actual princess. They couldn't recognize the elected leader of an entire planet because Lucas wanted a plot twist.

              This is bad writing.

              Queen Amidala literally had to get on her knees and beg Boss Nass and the militant Gungans to save them in the end. Did you forget that part?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Yes, moron. I mentioned the fact that no one recognizes the democratically elected leader of an entire planet for the sake of a dumb plot twist.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                NTA, but nobody recognized her because she was LARP’ing as a handmaiden for her own protection and having a body double as figurehead. How can you be this dense?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >repeats things of which everyone is aware
                Again, she was elected to be the leader of an entire planet. No one ever saw her? Lol. The reason that plot thread is there is so Lucas can have a plot twist which doesn't actually make sense of you think about it, lol.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                The people on her own planet knew who she was the entire time except for the Gungans you fricking moron. The only reason the Gungans didn’t know is because they were isolationists, if I flew your swarthy brown ass out to the Congo and told you to tell me which one of your hut dwelling ancestors was chieftain, how would you know?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >The people on her own planet knew who she was the entire time
                Nope. This isn't addressed because if it were the dumb plot twist Lucas wanted wouldn't be able to take place (even though the audience already knew because pictures of Natalie Portman in her regalia were part of the promotional campaign). Lol.

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >war on terrorism imagery
                You can't explain how the movies are allegory beyond surface level connections that are so loose they could be applied to pretty much any movie.

                >when a poster has such shit takes AND lazy writing style that you can tell who she is throughout the entire thread

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                Who exactly is it be that would be recognizing her? Which characters?

              • 4 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >prequelgay gets a whiff that something doesn't make sense and seeks ways to square the circle
                Absolutely no one recognizes the democratically elected leader of an entire planet until the plot needs the reveal to happen. Simple as.

            • 4 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              >Why can't fictional Naboo have child queens?
              Because the only reason she's a child is because Lucas needed to close the age gap between her and Anakin. It has no actual meaning for the plot or the world building. Also, unlike the figureheads your mentioning Padme performs actual governmental duties and has functional responsibility.
              >Even China has had child emperors who wielded actual power, and that's the biggest nation on Earth.
              No. China had hereditary rule and had regents that fulfilled their responsibilities until the ruler came of age.
              >And on another note it's not like the shitshow USA has going with senate, congress and President is any better
              Frick you're stupid. You don't even know how the separation of powers functions so don't bring up nonsense when you don't even know basic civics.

              With prequelgays it's always the same pattern:
              >ignore criticism
              >restate plotbeats everyone knows
              >insert headcanon
              >bring up something you don't understand but you've heard someone else say because you think it sounds smart
              You people are next level stupid. I get Star Wars fans arent going to be the brightest people but frick, lol.

  76. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Christianson's acting is NOT fine.

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Compared to the acting in MCU movies or Zendaya, he looks like a multiple time best actor academy award winner

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        who cares about that?

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