>YOU STOLE FIZZY LIFTING DRINKS

>YOU STOLE FIZZY LIFTING DRINKS
How do you respond without sounding mad?

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  1. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >man frick you and your bullshit entrapment factory I hope Slugworth breaks your ribs

  2. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    What was his fricking problem?

  3. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I wouldn't have stolen the fizzy lifting drinks, and that's what Charlie did

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Huh. Weirdly concise. Profound, almost.

  4. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >proof?

  5. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >I’ve been treated by the owner of the store, just walk on don’t worry about it, and I know the owner and trust me if he is to come back towards you you are to be executed you and everyone

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >They didn’t tell you

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      This is exactly what i would say, they didn't tell wonka. I was treated to a whole fizzy lifting drink, I drank 1/3.

  6. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    *burps*

  7. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    *CRACK*
    *glug glug glug glug glug*
    *BURRRRRRRRRRRRP*
    Aaaaahhhhh!...*burp*

  8. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >ye I did, get a load of this old man *BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP*

  9. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    FRICK YOU WONKA

  10. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    "I am going to tell the press you molested me. You took me into your factory, got me alone and you stuck your tongue down my throat."

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      "Can you prove that you didn't offer to save my factory if I let you... blow me?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Charlie was like 8

        Megabased

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Yeah, imagine pulling a move like that on an 8-year old, fricking 5D chess move right there.

  11. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >*put a second piece of candy that i stole on his table, turn 360 degrees and walk away*
    Was charlie trying to make him seethe even more by leaving a half melted piece of candy with bits of lint stuck to it on his desk?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Charlie was based and this movies moral center is very off kilter

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      LE HEKIN I DID SOMETHING WRONG HERE'S MY SORRIES KINO

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      You mean 180 degrees. If 360 you would be facing the same direction.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Not if you turn anti-clockwise, then the counter rotation of the Earth cancels out the last 180 degrees, so you're facing away from your original position relative to Sagittarius A*

  12. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Was Slugworth the good guy?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Slugworth wasn't shown in the movie at all.

  13. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Anyone else want to live like Grandpa joe?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      NEET life

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous
      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        my fricking sides

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      He really was a piece of shit

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        How so? He was working the system

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          He was also living in a twin bed with three other 90 year olds. I'm assuming you get autismbux that are equivalent to less than one of my weekly checks every month right?

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Dunno the house is in my name and paid off. So I only need enough to pay the property taxes and my parents have some money like 80k to give me when they pass

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              >80k
              That’s just a solid annual salary where I’m from. The amount a man would feel let him start planning for a kid. You’ll fritter it away and die like a rat in a hole.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Not at all I’m very minimal, I get food stamps and Medicaid too and my car with 17k miles is paid off

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Not the anon you're replying to but if that house is in your name you should probably sell it now and move into a meth park or you're fricked

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                How so? All I have to do is pay property tax and utilities can just work at dollar general down the street like 12 hours a week plus the savings in the bank etc

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                >80,000 plus working part time at the dollar general will carry me for my entire life
                good luck. You dad is going to die first and your mom is going to spend all of that money being a dumb c**t btw
                Good luck

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                I’m 40 it’s not like I’m 18 so not that crazy for that to carry me

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                It's gonna be tight but it sounds like you've got it planned. You need to keep in mind there is legitimately a 90% chance your mom will blow all of the money the second your dad dies.

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              So you're saying the answer is "yes"

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            He was unemployed because wonka fired everyone from the only factory in the city. He was justified in doing what he could to frick over wonka for basically leaving half the town without a job after importing a bunch of illegal midges to work in his farm for less than minimum wage.
            If anything he should have done more to try to frick with the factory once he saw the extent of it.
            It might seem a bit douchey from Charlie's perspective, but he's a child who isn't aware of the reality of the situation, so his fee fees are secondary

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              MF laid around for 20 years when he was perfectly capable of dancing around like a Kansas City homosexual. Plus he was smoking a pipe every day, what an butthole.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                >Kansas City homosexual
                Based reference

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                >Kansas City homosexual
                Based reference

                Throw out your hands, stick out your tush
                Hands on your hips, give them a push
                You'll be surprised you're doing the French Mistake

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_drive_into_deep_left_field_by_Castellanos

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      did they have to shit and piss in the bed?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >Getting footjobs in bed from gilfs
      >Free food
      >Shit and piss yourself as you please with no consequences
      >Sleep all day
      Sign me the frick up

  14. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Don't make me suck your dick!

  15. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Didn't he kill like three children? It seems like stealing some soda would pale in comparison to that.

    I steal fizzy lifting drinks every time I go to taco bell and ask for a water cup and then fill it up with Baja Blast and the employees are powerless to stop me.

  16. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I didn't steal them, I sampled them. That's part of the tour.

  17. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Lizzy fisting drink, you say?

  18. 1 month ago
    Anonymous
  19. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Calm down dude, it's just fizzy lifting drinks.

  20. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    You calling me a thief? Go frick yourself you frickin bum

  21. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    yeah and I nearly died, you forget about the drinks and I'll forget about the lawsuit

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >lawsuit
      It's in England, not Amerilardland.

  22. 1 month ago
    Anonymous
    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Something I can never quite figure out:
      What's worse - that people make stuff this shit, or that people watch stuff this shit?

  23. 1 month ago
    Anonymous
  24. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >fires his workers and replaces them with literal imported pygmy African slaves
    >almost kills five children within the span of like an hour
    Why are we supposed to like Wonka again?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      He's le ebpnin holds up spork royal order of jesters Mason xD

  25. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >noooo its not their fault they didnt read the contract!!!!!
    Frick Grandpa Joe.

  26. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Should of just stayed with his mom and cooked clothes in a giant vat, he was sort of happy before he went in

  27. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    FRICK you whitey

  28. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    FOR FRICK'S GRANDPA WE SOLD THOSE TO THE CUSTOMERS 2 WEEKS AGO

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      imagining a kino in my head where this is canon and the bear has to run the Wonka candy kitchen staffed by oompa loompas
      it's a true 11/10. unfilmable

  29. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >Charlie- my factory just wouldn't be the same if I didn't appoint a naive milquetoast with zero sense of self interest or self preservation as my successor
    >yes, even though I've never personally come close to displaying any of these personality traits
    >and yes, even though my golden ticket contest ACTIVELY SELECTED AGAINST all these noble, wonderful virtues of yours
    >Now get in the elevator, I'm going to bring you close to death several hundreds of times IN SPACE

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >>and yes, even though my golden ticket contest ACTIVELY SELECTED AGAINST all these noble, wonderful virtues of yours
      this is actually a good point, if the point of the Tickets and the tour of the factory was to find a successor why did he make it so likely that people like Veruca (rich), Augustus (fat), or Mike (autistic) would find them? Are these desirable traits in a successor?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Honestly yes because he was autistic, loved his own product and was rich.

  30. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I'd pick up half a chair and beat him half to death so he would fit in with the rest of his half an office.

  31. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Man I was so heart broken to find out they even remade willy wonka and chocolate factory because the original was "too out of touch" with modern audiences. This generation of writers have literally zero (0) creativity of their own.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      They remade it like, twenty years ago.
      There are professional TV writers who were born after the remake came out.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      the remake was good. I like both films but it made the film much more visually dazzling than was ever possible before and if "muh eyecandy" is ever an excuse for acclaim it's this one. A lot of other interesting improvements. Part of the fun seeing it as a kid was the visually modern effects.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        The Depp remake was horrid.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Frick you had to reply
        8/10 ragebait would rage again
        (Just in case you're serious though you should probably think about kys)

  32. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    So charge me for the damages. I'm still taking my infinite chocolates. You know as well as I do that contracts that need a microscope to read are not legally binding.

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