>YOU STOLE FIZZY LIFTING DRINKS
How do you respond without sounding mad?
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>YOU STOLE FIZZY LIFTING DRINKS
>YOU STOLE FIZZY LIFTING DRINKS
How do you respond without sounding mad?
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>man frick you and your bullshit entrapment factory I hope Slugworth breaks your ribs
What was his fricking problem?
I wouldn't have stolen the fizzy lifting drinks, and that's what Charlie did
Huh. Weirdly concise. Profound, almost.
>proof?
>I’ve been treated by the owner of the store, just walk on don’t worry about it, and I know the owner and trust me if he is to come back towards you you are to be executed you and everyone
>They didn’t tell you
This is exactly what i would say, they didn't tell wonka. I was treated to a whole fizzy lifting drink, I drank 1/3.
*burps*
*CRACK*
*glug glug glug glug glug*
*BURRRRRRRRRRRRP*
Aaaaahhhhh!...*burp*
>ye I did, get a load of this old man *BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP*
FRICK YOU WONKA
"I am going to tell the press you molested me. You took me into your factory, got me alone and you stuck your tongue down my throat."
"Can you prove that you didn't offer to save my factory if I let you... blow me?
Charlie was like 8
Megabased
Yeah, imagine pulling a move like that on an 8-year old, fricking 5D chess move right there.
>*put a second piece of candy that i stole on his table, turn 360 degrees and walk away*
Was charlie trying to make him seethe even more by leaving a half melted piece of candy with bits of lint stuck to it on his desk?
Charlie was based and this movies moral center is very off kilter
LE HEKIN I DID SOMETHING WRONG HERE'S MY SORRIES KINO
You mean 180 degrees. If 360 you would be facing the same direction.
Not if you turn anti-clockwise, then the counter rotation of the Earth cancels out the last 180 degrees, so you're facing away from your original position relative to Sagittarius A*
Was Slugworth the good guy?
Slugworth wasn't shown in the movie at all.
Anyone else want to live like Grandpa joe?
NEET life
my fricking sides
He really was a piece of shit
How so? He was working the system
He was also living in a twin bed with three other 90 year olds. I'm assuming you get autismbux that are equivalent to less than one of my weekly checks every month right?
Dunno the house is in my name and paid off. So I only need enough to pay the property taxes and my parents have some money like 80k to give me when they pass
>80k
That’s just a solid annual salary where I’m from. The amount a man would feel let him start planning for a kid. You’ll fritter it away and die like a rat in a hole.
Not at all I’m very minimal, I get food stamps and Medicaid too and my car with 17k miles is paid off
Not the anon you're replying to but if that house is in your name you should probably sell it now and move into a meth park or you're fricked
How so? All I have to do is pay property tax and utilities can just work at dollar general down the street like 12 hours a week plus the savings in the bank etc
>80,000 plus working part time at the dollar general will carry me for my entire life
good luck. You dad is going to die first and your mom is going to spend all of that money being a dumb c**t btw
Good luck
I’m 40 it’s not like I’m 18 so not that crazy for that to carry me
It's gonna be tight but it sounds like you've got it planned. You need to keep in mind there is legitimately a 90% chance your mom will blow all of the money the second your dad dies.
So you're saying the answer is "yes"
He was unemployed because wonka fired everyone from the only factory in the city. He was justified in doing what he could to frick over wonka for basically leaving half the town without a job after importing a bunch of illegal midges to work in his farm for less than minimum wage.
If anything he should have done more to try to frick with the factory once he saw the extent of it.
It might seem a bit douchey from Charlie's perspective, but he's a child who isn't aware of the reality of the situation, so his fee fees are secondary
MF laid around for 20 years when he was perfectly capable of dancing around like a Kansas City homosexual. Plus he was smoking a pipe every day, what an butthole.
>Kansas City homosexual
Based reference
Throw out your hands, stick out your tush
Hands on your hips, give them a push
You'll be surprised you're doing the French Mistake
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_drive_into_deep_left_field_by_Castellanos
did they have to shit and piss in the bed?
>Getting footjobs in bed from gilfs
>Free food
>Shit and piss yourself as you please with no consequences
>Sleep all day
Sign me the frick up
Don't make me suck your dick!
Didn't he kill like three children? It seems like stealing some soda would pale in comparison to that.
I steal fizzy lifting drinks every time I go to taco bell and ask for a water cup and then fill it up with Baja Blast and the employees are powerless to stop me.
I didn't steal them, I sampled them. That's part of the tour.
Lizzy fisting drink, you say?
Calm down dude, it's just fizzy lifting drinks.
You calling me a thief? Go frick yourself you frickin bum
yeah and I nearly died, you forget about the drinks and I'll forget about the lawsuit
>lawsuit
It's in England, not Amerilardland.
Something I can never quite figure out:
What's worse - that people make stuff this shit, or that people watch stuff this shit?
>fires his workers and replaces them with literal imported pygmy African slaves
>almost kills five children within the span of like an hour
Why are we supposed to like Wonka again?
He's le ebpnin holds up spork royal order of jesters Mason xD
>noooo its not their fault they didnt read the contract!!!!!
Frick Grandpa Joe.
Should of just stayed with his mom and cooked clothes in a giant vat, he was sort of happy before he went in
FRICK you whitey
FOR FRICK'S GRANDPA WE SOLD THOSE TO THE CUSTOMERS 2 WEEKS AGO
imagining a kino in my head where this is canon and the bear has to run the Wonka candy kitchen staffed by oompa loompas
it's a true 11/10. unfilmable
>Charlie- my factory just wouldn't be the same if I didn't appoint a naive milquetoast with zero sense of self interest or self preservation as my successor
>yes, even though I've never personally come close to displaying any of these personality traits
>and yes, even though my golden ticket contest ACTIVELY SELECTED AGAINST all these noble, wonderful virtues of yours
>Now get in the elevator, I'm going to bring you close to death several hundreds of times IN SPACE
>>and yes, even though my golden ticket contest ACTIVELY SELECTED AGAINST all these noble, wonderful virtues of yours
this is actually a good point, if the point of the Tickets and the tour of the factory was to find a successor why did he make it so likely that people like Veruca (rich), Augustus (fat), or Mike (autistic) would find them? Are these desirable traits in a successor?
Honestly yes because he was autistic, loved his own product and was rich.
I'd pick up half a chair and beat him half to death so he would fit in with the rest of his half an office.
Man I was so heart broken to find out they even remade willy wonka and chocolate factory because the original was "too out of touch" with modern audiences. This generation of writers have literally zero (0) creativity of their own.
They remade it like, twenty years ago.
There are professional TV writers who were born after the remake came out.
the remake was good. I like both films but it made the film much more visually dazzling than was ever possible before and if "muh eyecandy" is ever an excuse for acclaim it's this one. A lot of other interesting improvements. Part of the fun seeing it as a kid was the visually modern effects.
The Depp remake was horrid.
Frick you had to reply
8/10 ragebait would rage again
(Just in case you're serious though you should probably think about kys)
So charge me for the damages. I'm still taking my infinite chocolates. You know as well as I do that contracts that need a microscope to read are not legally binding.