>you wake up. >you're in a New York cafe. >on a tv you see Robert Downy Jr.

>you wake up
>you're in a New York cafe
>on a tv you see Robert Downy Jr. saying that he's Iron Man in front of the press
>after a period of time you realize that you have been PORTAL FANTASY'D (not isekai'd, that's a weeb term for losers) into the MCU right at the end of Iron Man
What do you do?
Do you try to change the future?
Do you try to get superpowers?
How do you get a job, shelter and identification in this new life?

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  1. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    I would move to the smallest town I could find in the midwest since New York gets invaded by aliens or blown up every week, and possibly study to be an injury lawyer specializing in superhero-related accidents

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      I feel like the real money would be in insurance appraisal and law

  2. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    I'd tell Loki everything that happens in Avengers 1 so he can win and ask in return he mind controls Black Widow to have sex with me

  3. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    I'd find and murder Kate Bishop, Monica Rambeau's daughter, She hulk pre transition, the little sandsucker ms.marvel, black falcons sister he can't get 2 nickels for while wearing a billion dollar suit of high tech battle armor. Id kill em all to stop this homosexualy ass MCU cringe we have been getting since infinity war.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      you sound like a fricked up moron

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      I’d find this anon, kill him, take his trips, and wait until Kate Bishop was of marrying age.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Why not murder Monica Rambo? Two birds, one infinity stone

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      The fact that you know who any of those people are is a sign that you should have a nice day

  4. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    I register goop.com so he has to buy it off me for a jillion dollars

  5. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    > Find you keep quipping, especially just after a really sad moment in your life.

  6. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    I get a gig as a Hammer security guard, training every day to block a hurricanrana so that when Black Widow shows up I can knock her out and do the thing that makes me feel like god

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      >and do the thing that makes me feel like god
      It's rape isn't it

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        It's Cinemaphile, what do you think

  7. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Move the FRICK out of New York, for one. I ain't dyin' to some God damn ayys.

  8. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    I put out a message on the internet saying hey Ultron what's up I know who you are how you're made - and get this - how you're defeated
    when he wakes up he will scan the internet, find my message, and track me down
    after that who knows haha

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      This, make posts on /b/ back in 2008 calling ALL of it up to the point Ultron starts fighting the avengers. let it be known in the post I know he'll read it and I know what happens until 2050 and play it smooth until now and probably be killed after but for however many years I'll be a fricking viceroy

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        Imagine posting the Google Ultron stories before he wakes up and then making sure he reads them. There’d be so much confusion lmao

  9. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Kill myself immediately

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      you wake up back in the cafe
      now what?

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        So it's like that. Okay, i live the rest of my life panhandling and sleeping in dumpsters until I'm murdered or die of disease or starvation or exposure or some catastrophic superhero related incident. Never once looking at a tv or asking anybody about what's going on.

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          you can do that now though

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            This life is actually worth living. I won't participate in the moronic fever dream of capeshit fantasists.

  10. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Play the stock market based on my knowledge of international catastrophes, get rich enough to do a hostile takeover of Stark Industries.

  11. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    I'd wait for Captain America to run out into Times Square after he got unfrozen and kick him right in the nuts

  12. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Wait at the shwarma place with a suicide vest and then take everyone after they save the world from the ayys while yelling "ALLAH AKBAR" to reset the clock as much as I can

  13. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    I'd go find Aunt May

  14. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    I'd find Bruce and tell him his cousin is a bawd

  15. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    i share a board with this many people who know the plots to marvel movies

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      >t. phoneposting homosexual

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        This homie still using vcrs and cassette players

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          >t. phoneposting zoomer homosexual

  16. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Why didn't they reverse Tony's death with the time stone? Why didn't Natasha come back to life after the Soul stone was returned? Why didn't Steve use the Time stone to reverse Natasha's death? How do you even return the Soul stone?
    Anyway, I'd move to Westview.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      Oh, and why did Strange only view 14,000,000 timelines? I just don't buy it, Feige.

      • 1 year ago
        Anonymous

        He stopped when he viewed one where they won.

        • 1 year ago
          Anonymous

          ...but why? There could have been a million where they win, but better. Where's the timeline where Thor goes for the head? Surely it exists.

          • 1 year ago
            Anonymous

            He wanted to pick one where Iron Man dies and can't be brought back, so it was good fortune he found one first. Didn't want people complaining why he didn't put them on the timeline where the good guys all live.

            • 1 year ago
              Anonymous

              But he picked one where Iron Man can be brought back. The Time stone is sitting right there, still in the iron gauntlet or whatever. Just shove Gwyneth Paltrow out of the way and reverse time.

  17. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    I tell him to not make Ultron

  18. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    I tell him to send me back I guess. Marvel just seems far too dangerous a world to live in

  19. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    NO MORE DEAD COPS!

  20. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    I'd get the time stone so I could go back in time and stop Hitler

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      >Stop him from applying to art school

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      >Sorry for bringing up Hitler.

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      >ALL THE STONES ARE HERE

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      From attacking the Soviet Union in winter, right?

  21. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    I would become The Punisher

  22. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    Just wait for Elon Musk to announce on live TV that he is the Ghost of Kiev

  23. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    try to contact Thanos and red pill him about being racially specific about his snap and tell him how to defeat the ~~*Avengers*~~

  24. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    I don't know anything about what happens in these movies because I'm not an underage redditor.

  25. 1 year ago
    Anonymous

    I survive long enough till thanos comes around and tell him he’s a fricking idiot because he can just double or quadruple the resources in the universe rather than kill half of it off like a moron

    • 1 year ago
      Anonymous

      >Thanos kills 7/8ths of the universe to quadruple the resources available
      Nice job

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