I can't wait to see Shrek's big fricking ass crack while he farts in glorious oil painting aesthetics on 3's.
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I can't wait to see Shrek's big fricking ass crack while he farts in glorious oil painting aesthetics on 3's.
They will ruin Shrek with woke shit. inb4 one of his kids is gay.
>allowing yourself to get angry by imagining things that won't happen
lol
lmao
wuss in boots was emasculated
Masculinity is good, and sorely missing in modern society, but your extremist ideal of it is why people like John K. exist
>Overcomes the innate fear of death itself
Get this homosexual out of here
>Crying over having to abandon his identity as an adventurer
>He's being a drama queen here because the scene is still played for laughs
Have you completely conquered your fear of death?
Funny to think working on the movie was the punishment hole for animators at the time.
>Funny to think working on the movie was the punishment hole for animators at the time.
do you think dreamworks animators are still being punished by working on trolls 3 and ruby gillman
Trolls 3 seems like a punishment hole movie.
The movie would have to have other ogres to begin with in order to imply one of Shrek's kids is gay. If Dreamworks revealed that there was secretly a village of ogres this whole time like they did with kung fu Panda, that would be way fricking dumber than anything involving their sexuality. I mean, I guess they could have Shrek's kids aged up to teen years and one of them is dating a human, but I think Dreamworks writers have zero interest in Shrek's kids. They never involve them in any of Shrek's little side stories except in like, bookended scenes.
>If Dreamworks revealed that there was secretly a village of ogres this whole time like they did with Kung Fu Panda, that would be way fricking dumber than anything involving their sexuality.
Didn't the fourth movie have an ogre the top amount of ogres?
I thought those were fake, alt reality ogres.
No, it was an alt reality where sherk didn't exist, and since he wasn't a thing, Fionna decided to leave in her ogre form and travel until eventually find an ogre village, wich leads to a better question, where are those ogres in the OG shrek timeline? is Shrek the sole survivor of a ethnic genocide??? also did prince charming took so long to find fionna that she decided to wander off? shouldnt he and the fairy goodmother still be alive in dead Shrek timeline?
Fiona is literally trans you dumb chud
She went from human to ogre and you all clapped
Shrekchuds, how will we ever recover from this one?
>implying that you can be transpecies
Fiona was
was what?
Literally an ogre trapped in the body of a human
He's gonna have an even more realistic panic attack scene
>Buzzwords buzzwords buzzwords!!!!
Thread already ruined by rightards as usual.
>Cinemaphiletroon mad that normies don't want to see leftoid slop in their media
You know there's plently of media to watch to your liking, it's called Daisy's Destruction.
Box office ruined by leftroons again.
Americ**ts ruin yet another thread with their political bs
Sametroon
Americans hamfisting their culture war bullshit into everything again zzzzzzz
KFP4 is already gonna have Awkwafina in it lol. Shrek's fricked.
>more unnecessary sequels
>live action adaptions
>sticking Akwafina somewhere in there
Dreamworks really is just Disney 2 jfc
I MAY BE AN ORGE BUT I AM NOT RACIST OR TRANSPHOBIC!
Trans characters exist in the Shrek universe.
I just realized that, with Larry King being gone, Doris isn't going to appear either (unless they recast her which is always a possibility)
Shrek 3 was an alright movie, it wasn't as good as the previous ones but it is still a good movie
It fares better with the mexican dub
>Shrek 3 was a good movie
Is this the new bait we're pushing now?
Welcome to San Andreas, I'm CJ from Grove Street
Land of the heinous, gangbangers, and cold heat
In Los Santos, neighbors get no sleep
Beefing with anybody competing, even police
Four deep in a green rag with gold feet
Blast with the flag on the strap, that's OG
Stay in shape, hit the gym, lift the weights
Get super cut or big and buff, nice and straight
You got stats, respect, weapon skill
Stamina, muscle, fat, and sex appeal
You get clothes from Bincos and Pro Laps
Sub Urban, ZIP, Victim, and D. Sachs
Watch your back when you in rival hoods
They'll test just to guess if your survivals good (Survivals good)
Ducking shells at the Cluckin' Bell
Jump out busting, gunning 'til they tuck their tail
It seem like I'm on impossible missions (Impossible missions)
Twisted predicaments hostile positions (Hostile positions)
Tenpenny and Pulaski harass me
Cop cars been on our ass the last past week
'Cause the 'Dreas for the gangsters, homeboy
Hands is the language for the 'bangers, homeboy
And it's dangerous, homeboy
Get your brains blow for how you do your fingers, homeboy
Heat wienered, we poppin' hot ones
Dump them out, bend the block, shake before the cops come
Listen for sirens, they don't got none
Back another lap, catch a straggler with a shotgun
Hittin' them up what that Grove Street like
In a dirty sling shot and old Levi's
I read it in Niko Bellic's voice because I don't remember CJ's voice.
you should play it again
CJ has no personality, he basically exists to be an object the story characters exposit towards during cutscenes. Most of his dialogue is single-word replies like 'what' and 'sheeit'. More people remember his grunts and yells when he gets injured during gameplay than they do any of his actual lines. The only ones I can remember that's an actual sentence is "what the frick I look like I'm made of, puddin'?" And the monologue from the intro cutscene.
Oh no. The dialogue is very funny and memorable in that game, and CJ is no exception to that. The real flaw of the game is the backseating of the series' main criminal theme for a wacky, zany, "save the neighborhood", "drugs are bad" story and moral.
Quote me some funny CJ lines.
>nb4 "ah sheeit, here we go again"
>You say it like it's a bad thing~
>Loc, is he available for com‧mu‧ni‧ca‧tion?
>You sure this thing is safe? I can see daylight through the floor.
>[screaming like a b***h] Frick you, Toreno! I never want to go through this again! I think I'm gonna hurl…
I know you're just gonna say no, so why reply?
>I know you're blind, but you gotta see this
>I hate gravity!
>that conversation about how when he went swimming as a kid and a condom got on his face
>pretty much any quote when he's obese and collects money
>You do know I'm black right? Not Chinese
My Idea for Shrek 5,
>Shrek's kids are teenagers
>all of them have their issues
>Shrek's daughter reveals she's got a crush on a boy
>Shrek is slightly over-protective initially
>He later learns the boy is actually the son of Prince Charming and the evil queen(who helped heal him after the set fell on him)
>He forbids his daughter from seeing the boy which becomes the driving act of the movie
>They still see each other secretly
>Something happens and an outside power kidnaps the kid
>Shrek, Fiona and Charming team-up to save their kids.
This sounds so fricking lame I can easily see it being real
Is this a leaked poster?
You were a leaked mistake
I HATE PSEUDO-CLAYMATION
I HATE PSEUDO-CLAYMATION
I HATE PSEUDO-CLAYMATION
I HATE PSEUDO-CLAYMATION
I really hope that they return to the classic animation style, the new Puss is indistinguishable from Disney.
shrek get ipad
God I want the the dragon to rip a fat frickin fart on me and the entire town. Holy fricking shit it would be so hot
The "V" is for "Vasectomy."
You mean vaShrektomy.
Shrek must've been a godsend for marketers
>how can we sell more of this
>uh.. make it green
>brilliant
Yes, I too saw that Youtube video.
>needs a youtuber to remember something from his childhood
lol zoomer
>"Noooo, I'm not a trend follower, I'm actually the one guy that's original!"
>t. gay that makes threads 1 hour after they watch a cartoon reviewer's latest upload
>You have to watch youtubers explain how to breath! It's what everyone does!
No. You just like to ruin topics by showing everyone how moronic you are that you need to find things out from bite sized information. You're a modern magazine reader.
>>No u!
You mentioned them first, zoomer. Go listen to your tinnitus.
>I'm not saying "no u" because YOU accused me first!
-7 IQ argument there.
Take your obsession with your parasocial friendships to another thread, you moronic zoomer.
link?
>win a donkey
frickin lmao. I wonder who got the donkey
>some guys face who lives in a 12th story 1 room apartment
Did he deserve to be crushed by a tower?
No i thought he had redeemed himself by then
>(sarcastically to Shrek after the dinner incident) Very nice, Shrek
>What? I told you coming here was a bad idea
>You could’ve at least tried to get along with my father
Um, Fiona, he actually did. Besides, it's a bit quick to make that statement when only a few hours have passed since you arrived at Far Far Away. Shrek and Harold barely had time to interact with each other so far.
So who were those silent bald guys supposed to be?
Fairy God Mother's enforcers/body guards. Either that, or just there for intimidation.
A woman acting irrational about a family upset in one of those moving pictures? Unheard of.
My body is ready
Guys how do I get my Shrek amiibo toy out of my butthole? I accidentally sat on it when I slipped on my cum sock and now it's lodged up my butt. I try to pull it out but every time I do it makes my butt hurt please help me.
Can't do ass crack
It's weird how in the Fairy Godmother's potion factory scene, we are shown two tigers inside a cage, but nothing comes out of that. Like, when Shrek drops that purple potion all over the room, we don't see the tigers being transformed into something else like with the swans and the factory employees.
You can later see the tigers right before Shrek drops the purple potion on the room.
Shrek premiered on May 2001. Andrew Adamson was already the director by April 1997. You can see his name there.
Do you have to ruin every Shrek thread?
"Happily Ever After" is said only twice in the first Shrek, yet it's said 10 times in Shrek 2
I don't remember anyone asking for a tally
Dreamworks went overboard with the amount of heart signs in Shrek 2. They are everywhere. So many of them. I think the only heart sign in the first film is when Dragon blows pink smoke on Donkey's face.
>Went overboard with heart sign
>Shows 1 (one) heart sign
Bro, are you complaining about a honeymoon getaway having hearts in it? What kind of moronic autism is this? It's like you can barely perceive what normal people see everyday.
Why was Fairy Godmother such a piece of shit in the first place?
Shriek was never a super gross out movie. Like yeah in the beginning of the first one he’s farting and doing earwax gags, but after that its very sparse the rest of the series
The fart in 2 after he drinks the potion is gross for G/PG animation film standards. Blame the sound effect and the camera angle.
>Recess: School's Out
>Shrek
>Atlantis: The Lost Empire
>The Trumpet of the Swan
>Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within
>Osmosis Jones
>Waking Life
>Monsters, Inc.
>Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius
All the theatrical Cinemaphile films of 2001, in that order. Shrek won the first academy award for Best Animated Feature at the start of 2002.
No one cares
Its crazy how much better animation used to be... Any of those movies if made today would have easily been the best movie of the year for the past few years... How did we regress so much? I miss when animation was fun.
>"It's gonna be champagne wishes and caviar dreams from now on"
>"Hey, good looking! We'll be back to pick you up later"
Some of the references in Shrek 2 are pointless. Those two are said back to back by Donkey in the Funkytown scene.
Why was Fiona shaving her philtrum and cheeks with a razor and cream at the start of 2?
Because she's an ogre and ogres have body hair more than the average person? How can such a simple joke like this fly over your head?
Shrek 2 sure has a frick ton of jokes, doesn't it?
A frick ton of jokes that a certain kind of autist can't understand apparently. Talk about being filtered.
hahahaha just have a nice day you uselees fricking sperg
>no explanation as to why it took Charming so long to go rescue Fiona, or how did he escape from the castle if the bridge was broken
>Fiona forces Shrek to go to an unknown kingdom/meet her parents/be part of a royal ball despite him not wanting to
>Harold starts shit at the table more than once
>Fairy Godmother somehow appears in front of Fiona just because she shed a tear
>Shrek announces that they're leaving on the night from their arrival day
>Charming just happened to come back from his rescue journey 5 minutes ago
>Shrek reads Fiona's diary
>Puss is shown to be a fraud despite his reputation as an ogre killer
>Shrek decides to pay a visit to Fairy Godmother instead of going to have a talk with Fiona
>everyone at the factory falls for Shrek's poor disguise
>Donkey doesn't follow the simple instruction of keeping watch at the potion room, thus causing Godmother to realize that they stole a potion
>Shrek awakes in his human form much earlier than Fiona does
>Shrek and Fiona somehow miss each other at the castle, and Shrek decides to let Fiona go after falling for Godmother's manipulation
>Fiona doesn't realize that new Shrek is an impostor despite his different voice, different personality, him calling "mom and dad" to Harold and Lillian, and Donkey not being with him at any point
>Godmother decides that Fiona needs to be drugged with a love potion just because she hasn't fallen in love with the new Shrek 1 hour after meeting him
>Donkey exclaims "mother!" when the trio is eavesdropping, causing them to be discovered and put in jail
>Magic Mirror is a TV with remote control
>Shrek's friend travel more than 700 miles on the same night without transport
>Gingy just happens to have his creator living nearby, and he quickly creates a giant living cookie with a lighting bolt and lots of flour
>Charming dissapears after Godmother dies
>Harold gives his blessing to Shrek and Fiona while they're in their human bodies instead of their ogre bodies
Don't like the story
How many times do we have to tell you we don't care?
Hello Cinema Sins.
Nothing wrong with critizicing a marketed to death sequel which was 2004's highest grossing film and the highest grossing animation film ever for 6 years.
You forgot to write the dings at the end of your points.
You're not criticizing anything, you're just blasting your autism at everyone unprompted at every possible opportunity. This isn't even a thread about Shrek 2 you fricking sperg.
Oh wow you're a homosexual
>no explanation as to why it took Charming so long to go rescue Fiona, or how did he escape from the castle if the bridge was broken
Charming is a lazy good for nothing handsome butthole with a powerful mother both literally and figuratively. Their marriage was suppose to be arranged. It’s clear she’s doing everything for him because she, ya know, does everything for him throughout the movie. She probably sent him and a horse right outside Fiona’s tower when FG told him it was time. No one thought she’d be rescued for real.
> Fiona forces Shrek to go to an unknown kingdom/meet her parents/be part of a royal ball despite him not wanting to
Meeting your spouses parents is a big deal. Shrek is not going to piss off his newlywed wife he cares about because this is clearly important to her. A relationship is about give and take
>Harold starts shit at the table more than once
Yeah because he hates Shrek and is a bigot. This is considered a plot hole??
> Fairy Godmother somehow appears in front of Fiona just because she shed a tear
FG is plotting to marry her son to Fiona and can spy on people with magic. Again what’s the problem here?
> Shrek announces that they're leaving on the night from their arrival day
Because he hates her family for mistreating him on a trip he didn’t want to go. Shrek was willing to try for Fiona, but he’s not going to be disrespected constantly either.
> Charming just happened to come back from his rescue journey 5 minutes ago
Again magic. Why would you want to see his journey back home anyway?
>Shrek reads Fiona’s diary
And?
> Puss is shown to be a fraud despite his reputation as an ogre killer
Shrek saved his life before their fight was over. He didn’t want to kill Shrek anymore. He’s clearly a capable fighter in the movie regardless if you could kill Shrek
> Shrek decides to pay a visit to Fairy Godmother instead of going to have a talk with Fiona
Shrek is feeling self conscious. His in laws hate him and his wife’s room indicates she wanted a pretty human boy to marry. A character flaw is not a plot hole
> everyone at the factory falls for Shrek's poor disguise
Humor is subjective, but you can’t be this autistic to not get that’s the joke
> Donkey doesn't follow the simple instruction of keeping watch at the potion room, thus causing Godmother to realize that they stole a potion
Not OOC for him. He’s also in the middle of feeling self conscious too thinking his best friend is getting too chummy with someone else he doesn’t like. He’s an easily distracted character that’s currently getting distracted.
> Shrek awakes in his human form much earlier than Fiona does
Characters waking up at different times is a plot hole? Yeah the guy who slept in a barn outside is probably not going to enter as deep of a sleep as Fiona in her princess bed
> Shrek and Fiona somehow miss each other at the castle, and Shrek decides to let Fiona go after falling for Godmother's manipulation
FG is a great manipulator. She’s playing into his doubts because Shrek is an actual good guy who wants Fiona happy. This is just normal human emotions.
> Fiona doesn't realize that new Shrek is an impostor despite his different voice, different personality, him calling "mom and dad" to Harold and Lillian, and Donkey not being with him at any point
She definitely notices something is off right away. It isn’t hard to believe the potion changed his voice too. Fiona was reverting back to her original human form where Shrek would be completely changing into something new. Its also not hard to believe he was trying to get along with his new family calling them dad and mom. She has no reason to question it too hard. Donkey being missing however is a decent point. She should have noticed Donkey being absent.
> Godmother decides that Fiona needs to be drugged with a love potion just because she hasn't fallen in love with the new Shrek 1 hour after meeting him
Fiona and charming are not a good match. FG can see that, but she doesn’t care because she wants her son to marry into royalty. She’s a villain anon.
> Magic Mirror is a TV with remote control
Another obvious joke and who cares?
> Shrek's friend travel more than 700 miles on the same night without transport
Kind of nit picky but okay sure
> Gingy just happens to have his creator living nearby, and he quickly creates a giant living cookie with a lighting bolt and lots of flour
There’s nothing overly coincidental about that. This world is magic. Why is a small talking cookie fine but not a big one?
>Charming dissapears after Godmother dies
Yeah he’s a b***h who can’t do anything for himself
> Harold gives his blessing to Shrek and Fiona while they're in their human bodies instead of their ogre bodies
And that’s what writers call a conclusion to a character arc. He realizes he was being a hypocrite and caring more about what he thought was best for Fiona and not what she actually wanted.
TL;DR
Get Shreked On
Abusing the mentally moronic like this is illegal
God bless you
>Fiona will never sit on your face
*shit
Fiona will never shit on your face
Thanks for the fix.
Not a single G/PG american animation film with comedy elements before Shrek 2 in 2004 was so indulgent in having content aimed at older audiences. Closest one is probably Osmosis Jones in 2001.
Are you even having a conversation with anyone here? Why do you sperg out about Shrek 2 in every thread that mentions Shrek even if it has nothing to do with that particular movie? Give it a rest already, you're just spamming off topic shit at this point.
Damn homie, I don't recall asking for your opinion on this though.
How did he reach this level where he can do no wrong. No matter how gross, wrong or messed up a joke or anything with him is, it’s always taken as a joke. SpongeBob has that ability too
Because they embrace the fact that they're silly.
>What should we do with him?
>I say we take the sword and neuter him right here. Give him the Bob Barker treatment
>Oh no, por favor! Please! I implore you! It was nothing personal, señor! I was doing it only for my family. My mother, she is sick. And my father lives off the garbage! The king offered me much in gold and I have a litter of brothers...
Puss in Boots 2011 revealed that Puss was lying to save his balls in that scene from 2.
I fricking hate americ**ts
Is sharktalegay complaining about Shrek 2 for being the most beloved Dreamworks film of 2004 (and one if it's most well liked films overall) against his favorite flick that universally considered absolute garbage (even if incredibly entertaining) again?
Wh yes he is. He's seething and malding and whining and crying and pissing and shitting and banging his wee little hands all over the thread.
Is it really Sharktalegay or is it a completely different person?
SharkTalegay got permabanned ages ago. Many people have picked up the mantle since then.
I'm sure some of it is genuinely him unless someone is equally autistic enough to post in his ESL style without copy and pasting. Only thing that changed is that he straight up stopped interacting with anyone, just spamming his autistic drivel for no one's enjoyment but his own.
>he straight up stopped interacting with anyone, just spamming his autistic drivel for no one's enjoyment but his own
I think that might be a hint it's not him. Remember GR15?
See, you would think that but this isn't some simple copy and paste job. Who else would be that autistic to try and replicate his inane posting style and content with this amount of frequency?
They seem pretty identical to me. I've seen certain posters make the same thread daily with swapped around words so you can't find them through the archives. They're dedicated shitheads.
>incredibly entertaining
it's not
subjective but I've always sound it so bad it's good, plus there's some shit that's genuinely funny (though that's mostly cuz of the casts delivery and chemistry)
It's funny how Arthur only appears in Shrek the Third. His existence is ignored for the remainder of the franchise (christmas special, Forever After, halloween special)
As long as we get fat fiona breasts in 4k, I'm happy
>any Shrek thread these days
He has to know how insufferable he is. He has to. Must be a masochist for insults or something.
>Come on, you could at least give them a chance
>Oh, to do what? Sharpen their pitchforks?
>No. They just want to give you their blessing
>Oh, great. Now i need their blessing?
>Well if you want to be a part of this family, yes
>And who says i want to be a part of this family?
>Uh, you did? When you married me?
>Well, there's some fine print for you
That Shrek/Fiona discussion at the start of 2 is a crappy scene. Even the novelization removed it (only scene missing on it)
gem
>82 minutes and 50 seconds before credits start rolling
Don't you think Shrek 2 is a bit short for a CG film released in 2004? A Bug's Life and Toy Story 2 are longer and they came out in the late 90s. Don't forget that 2004 gave us The Incredibles, which was the longest CG film at the time (almost 110 minutes without credits)
Who are you talking to? No one is engaging with you outside of calling you a moron and for good reason
SHREK EXPERTS, I need your opinion. Does the original film have 2D backgrounds in some scenes?
this movie holds up really well god damn
Is Shrek cut or uncut?
Are you asking if he's had a circumshreksion?
He has layers
Shrek isn't israeli or an amerimutt
Shrek is a 2000s thing and doesnt work outside that era.its like making a cheers movie in the 2020s
>its like making a cheers movie in the 2020s
Don't give them any ideas
Was there a 4th one?