Post your pitch to make the James Bond movie franchise great again. NOW.
 CRIME Shirt $21.68 |
 Tip Your Landlord Shirt $21.68 |
CRIME Shirt $21.68 |
Post your pitch to make the James Bond movie franchise great again. NOW.
Post your pitch to make the James Bond movie franchise great again. NOW.
CRIME Shirt $21.68 |
Tip Your Landlord Shirt $21.68 |
CRIME Shirt $21.68 |
white male lead as James Bond gets killed in action saving a _______ [minority group tbd later] thus ending the series
/misc/ has arrived to accomplish their time honored role of killing everyone's fun. You people are nothing but a burden and a cross to bare for everyone else who wants to have fun and a good time
Set in the 60s, Bond is white.
a big fat NEGRESS waddles around on screen saying snappy lines, hacking into computers, and beating up russian spies for 2 hours and 47 minutes. a white male superior does a racism and she tells him off.
Instead of having it be set in the 21st century, we go back to the 20th. Preferably in 1974 Finland.
Start remaking the same old ones, same plot and everything. New actors.
Idris Elba but all his lines are dubbed by AI Sean Connery.
go back to the 60s. casablanca, monaco, cuba, beirut.. there's so much kino potential
Cavill as Bond
Dalton and Brosnan come back as villains, bitter how the MI6 ditches agents once they're too old. Myabe it's too similar to Skyfall but Skyfall sucked and could have been done so much better.
Kino.
Pierce already kind of did this in The November Man but I'd watch it again.
Bond needs to rescue 7 daughters from the 7 most powerful nations on earth that have been kidnapped by an incel terrorist organization. This adventure takes bond across the 7 seas and the 7 continents, in the end he is victorious and beds all 7 daughters. Yes they are all hot and of different ethnicities.
d-do the incels get to have sex too?
No. They die in a variety of ways.
why can't it be our time just ONCE??
The bad guy is a Musk/Bezos type who is building a moonbase to frick up the moon's orbit and disrupt the tides on earth so they can blame it on global warming. James Bond has cool gadgets and cool cars and goes into space and maybe he shoots a henchman into a moon volcano with a laser. The Craig movies were too serious.
Bond is a balding incel
I genuinely think they need to go back to the classic bond cliches
>hot as frick bond girl
>car with gadgets
>bond has gadgets
>villain has tough main henchman
>Q is an old man not some annoying twink
>bond actually fricks multiple women
Henry Cavill as James Bond
Daniella Melchor as the exotic love interest
David Thewlis as either M or the villain
Daisy-Edgar Jones as the Bond girl
Carian Hinds as either M or the villain
dir. Nolan or bring back Martin Campbell
This would make a billion and be extreme kino. Only Brits, with the exception of the Iberian waifu.
Andrew Lincoln as Felix Leiter
Brian Cox as Q
The whole thing is a period piece and has kino Bond characteristics injected back in. The theme song should be classic but also tastefully modern so to reel in the zoomers so they can actually taste some real Bond kino for the first time in their lives. Mind you, i don't like AM i'm just using it as an example. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u2_3wS8u9Cw
Cavillgays are mentally ill.
Is this more to your liking, cuck?
Why are you calling him a cuck when you have this Black person on your computer? Are you going to say you just downloaded it? I doubt you searched "Black person" and found his picture.
That's quite literally what I did.
My fricking Black person alarm is going off so hard right now and I'm leaving the thread. Frick sharing a thread with you """people""".
Cavill has zero range and appeals only to women and whatever men's self help group you crawled out of. He was great in MoS because his clumsiness worked out in his favour as an inexperienced Clark. He's otherwise been completely mediocre in every role since. You homosexuals can suck his virtual wiener all you like, it's not gonna make him a better actor. Keep posting Black folk all you like.
The answer to all your gibberish is to watch the movie i've posted pictures from. The Man from Uncle. If that doesn't convince you he's a great actor and most certainly has charisma even beyond Bond, then nothing will. Even if that were true, who the hell else in the current industry is even close to being Bond? Let me know who you've picked.
I've seen Man from Uncle. It's his second best role but I wasn't really impressed. It feels more like he's in an ad playing james bond. I'd pick Pattinson.
I really think you should revisit it, it's as pitch perfect a Bond to me as it gets. Maybe he can get more lean but I feel it's now or never. He can squeeze out max 3 movies but I can see Patts as Bond, he's a Brit and very good as an actor. He should have not done that horrible and forgettable capeshit film and jumped on the Bond train after Graig shat the bed after a run of mediocre films, barring CR which he still was only passable. I can definitely see it. Hell, it's better than it being a you know what.
Maybe I will, level headed anon. Sorry I called you a gay.
It's a short and very comfy film with electric chemistry between the leads and I feel like you'll come to appreciate it as have many others years after it's release. Also no problem anon. I hope you're having a nice day.
Just about anyone else >>> Pattinson >>>>>>>>
GAP>>>>>>Any Black person
>Daisy-Edgar Jones as the Bond girl
I'd go to the kinoplex every day until they stopped showing it.
patrician taste
Remove all women from production.
>007: Dilate Another Day
>A billionaire troony by the name of Choppa Balzoff has created a hypnotic GIF file that has the ability to turn young men into xer "catboy slaves", spamming it all over Discord
>With the help of the femme fatale, Nevaeh B. Woman, can Bond put a stop to this madman before he pozzes our neg society?
>literally born to play Bond but never did
He'd have been on par with Jeremy Brett's Holmes as the most definitive version of a book character.
Hmm..
Make a murder mystery bond movie, wherein bond is sent in to uncover the mystery of whodunnit.
Alright I've had a pitch for while now and its stands against everything that James Bond but I'm obsessed with it so here goes nothing:
We start in the early 2000s at MI6 Headquarters
James is a top recruit in training at a clandestine training program where he was picked up from an unidentified country (later revealed to be Russia) as a Kid. Rises up the ranks while befriending many of his fellow recruits and members of MI6 who he considers to be his family.
One day, there is a massive explosion in the lower levels of the MI6 headquarters where he witnesses Q, his father figure, and M succumb to their injuries. He makes his way to the clandestine site where he witnesses 7 Masked operatives lay waste to his fellow recruits, his kin, consisting of children as young as 4 years old. He hastily tries to save them by killing one of the operatives and fighting another one of them before he is knocked out by the leader of the operatives, who beats James to an inch of his life and leaves him to die in the crumbling, burning facility.
Cue opening Credits (Song to be used: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CLiDemXYSLc ) where we allude to James' state of mind. A mixture of sorrow, grief and hellish rage against the perpetrators.
After the opening, we are introduced to James again. It's been 7 years since the attack, his entire back is heavily scarred since he's been training relentlessly and eliminating high level targets to earn the dreaded license to kill to exact his vengeance against the people who took his family from him. His entire demeanor is calm and dignified but there is a certain madness in his eyes. He is introduced to the new Q, the son of his father figure, and Miss Moneypenny, another attractive young recruit. She's cold, foul-mouthed but still holds a lot of empathy for Q and James.
Sure, it is far darker and grimdark than you would think of a Bond film plot but it sounds kino to me and can work for execution is everything. Kino song too that sounds perfect. Who would you cast for Bond and the love interest, villain and etc?
I really don't know who would play James here. I haven't even thought about the love interest yet since I wanted this to be a very personal tale about James' growth not just as an operative but also as a person.
But I really want you guys to chime in about which actor should be cast in any of the roles I've mentioned since I have no idea.
Idris Elba
i'll tell all my hollywood pedophile friends to make this since you wanted the radiohead song that wasn't used for some reason to be used
We now follow James, Q and Miss Moneypenny as they go around the world chasing these targets where they uncover a conspiracy that ties these operatives, to the founding members of the clandestine unit and the most powerful crime syndicate of the world. Spectre.
I kinda want this movie to be directed by Gareth Evans but have him not use the martial art that he used during The Raid movies but still bring the sophistication and grit of those movies that perfectly juxtaposes itself with the more posh nature of these bond films.
I envision this as a 4 part series where we start with James lacking the sophistication and control that is required for holding the license to kill to being a force of nature who understands the cost of rage and human life and while dreading the burden that this job has on him, his friends and his eventual family, he still does what is necessary to save his loved ones.
Don't know who'd play James here or even Q and Moneypenny, maybe you guys can chime in.
Your vision of Bond only seems to spring a certain actor for me, Jack Huston. He fits if we're going for a (tasteful) grimdark Bond. Also, I feel like Mia Goth would be a good Bond side-girl as I can infer that you're going for Moneypenny as the main love interest or are you not? And that she's going for a more active role so i picket Florence Pugh who I odn't like much but she fits with what you described. As for villains, i'd throw in Alexander Skarsgard for the villain. For Q, someone who fits the overall look but is also sleak and modern like Ian Glen. I threw in a mock title as well. I really like Bond movies, if that isn't clear enough lol
Jack Huston, while nailing the grim look, looks too rugged and old tbh.
I was thinking more along the lines of Jamie Dornan, Sam Clafin and Jamie Campbell Bower. But not exactly that. It's hard to describe really.
And no I don't want Moneypenny to be bonds love interest neither a sister figure. Think about a friend, a very close friend who has seen you suffer who respects you yet is sort of distant. Someone who is always there when you are at lowest but isn't always there when it comes to celebrating. And you're right I want her to play a more vital role in James' life. As for the actress... Florence? Sure...
As for the villain, I really want Pilou Asbæk to play the character.
Well, i figured since you're going for a grittier approach to Bond then his rugged and weary look does go along with that, doesn't it? Or did I misunderstand something?
>Sam Clafin
that one works better out of the actors you listed. I like the approach to Moneypenny and your choice of Bond villain. Care to share more?
>
Oh no you didn't misunderstand anything its just that He seems too rugged from the images I've seen and I haven't seen anything he's been in.
Also I want this bond to be as young as possible, jack really does look the part but he also looks distinctly mature. It may work but I'm really conflicted.
I haven't really figured out the love-interest, bond girl stuff because even though they traditionally have played a huge part in the films, they almost always have stood as impediments to what makes Bond tick for me. So that's the last thing on my mind rn which is why I mentioned it stands against everything James Bond is.
Also if you're from MGM, hire me.
Also forgot to say this but excellent title.
>(later revealed to be Russia)
Thanks for the spoiler.
it was never great to begin with
Pattinson as Bond
Dev Patel as Rishi Sunak
Idris Elba as M
Rowan Atkinson as Q
Saoirse Ronan as Moneypenny
Sydney Sweeney as the Bond girl
Sam Rockwell as the villain
Inspired casting. All excellent choices.
So here's my idea, we declare all of the Daniel Craig films as non-canon fanfiction, and that Die Another Day is the final Bond movie, and then never make another one, ever!
>last two actors' last movies both say they can't die yet
You can't do that.
James Bond Needs A Kidney
there's a reason they stir martinis
It'll never happen but make two separate timelines. One set in the 50s and accurate to the book, realistic spy stuff, misogynistic and depressed bond etc. The other is modern bond with all the Stunts, songs, gadgets etc. Stagger their productions so you can have a bond film come out every 2 years, alternating between the 2 timelines. Dua lipa does song and is the bond girl
you know that will just lead to
>James Bond: No Way Home
and i got two words for that: Frick. No.
There's rumours Dr no is back for the next film
Could work.
I can't quite agree with your assesment ocncerning Bond girls but I can understand the thinking. Your ideas are very intriguing. Also, i am not from MGM i'd like to hold on to my foreskin lol.
Very frickable turkic/balkan girl and phenotype but the gay trope of putting singers or celebrities in Bond movies wa a shit and sovlless aspect of the Graig films so that should not be repeated. Also, she's apparently going to be a love interest in a Bond-like spy film with Cavill called Argylle. Anyone heard of this?
>Dua Lipa
Incredibly profoundly shit taste. Please have a nice day immediately.
>the plot shouldn't address modern politics directly but focus on a villain who is trying to exploit these things for personal gain
>walk the line between thrilling and fun. Too convoluted or dark bores/scares kids. Too daft bores adults.
>no continuity. All plots and side characters should be contained to 1 movie. Reuse Q, M, Moneypenny actors as usual.
>the movie should act as a showcase for cutting edge stunt work, set design and location filming
>cgi is fine but just enough to make the practical action look as good as possible
>banging theme tune that repeats throughout the score
Rinse, repeat.
Your understanding of the Bond formula is on the money. Who would you have in mind for the cast?
The problem is I can't pick a Bond. All the Brit actors of the right age are either twinks or give off a more footballer/squaddie vibe. Someone mentioned Tom Hughes in another thread and I really like his look but apparently he's already 36.
>but apparently he's already 36.
Isnt Bond in his 40s in the books?
Yes, but the problem with an older actor is that they age out of the role within like 2 movies
Roger Moore played Bond until his mid-fifties.
>your job is travel the world pretending to be a spy, become a hero to millions of boys in your country, pretend to frick a supermodel who’s 30 years younger than you then possibly frick her for real after the cast party
Some people have all the luck…
At this point, it's pretty much down to Cavill. I can't honestly see anyone else being close to good for Bond than him and maybe Pattinson but that's a stretch. Just wait for A.I to get so good, you just put in a stand-in and turn him into Connery or Dalton or whatever. That's about the only play left.
Okay, hear me out on this; we switch the gender of the character for a little while. Jamie Bond will act just like classic James Bond, constantly having sex with guys with ridiculous names like Magnum Dong and Clitt Lickler. Everybody will be all YAS QUEEN SLAY, then we switch back to male Bond and they can't criticize it without being hypocrites.
Bond uncovers a plot by wealthy israeli families to unite the world under a single man they simply refer to as their Messiah. MI6 is completely compromised so he has to go about his mission to assassinate the Messiah and end the Cabal without any of the high-tech gadgets he previously relied upon.
Yeah yeah we get it. You got radicalized by internet politics because you are a weak minded human being. No need to ruin everyone else's fun
>Antisemitism
>Internet politics
>Has existed for thousands of years
Make it indie-tier
Make Bond poor
Make actions gritty as John Wick or Oldboy
Name Rishi Sunak and his party as collaborators to the villain, in fiction of course.
If there aren't at least one subpoena you're doing it wrong.
>New Bond starts as 007
>gets his ass beat trying to do things by the book
>falls to his lowest and nearly fired
>about to be captured
>enemies shot by suppressed weapon
>Pierce Brosnan walks up with a PPK and offers him a hand
>uses his old blackberry to summon his invisible car
>takes him back to his hideout and explains to him how Bond is a passed down position and it’s time for his training
>cue an hour of Karate Kid style training in Poker, seduction, shooting, rubber mask disguises, exploding pens, laser watch, and one liners before explosions.
>finished training and goes off into the world
>Brosnan smiles to camera surrounded by Sean Connery and Dalton force ghosts
Tell me I’m wrong
bond should be a weapon for british interests
no save the world shite
he should be poisoning british MPs with novichok to sway the brexit vote
I want /misc/ off my board
Dilate about it
While I would have preferred more interesting and genuine discussion of the topic, maybe r/movies would be more your speed.
The fact is that 90% of the people on Cinemaphile who are racist and/or antisemitic don't even browse /misc/. You're seething because you can't fathom simply ignoring people you disagree with. It's childish, and you should feel ashamed.
This. I've never browsed that board and am completely indifferent. Most people in the world are racist and antisemitic, that's just how it is. They might as well stay in their bubble or move to Mars.
Same. /misc/ has destroyed the average IQ of this site and they have made it impossible to discuss anything without their moron culture war shit being shoved down our throats.
www.reddit.com
James bond but, he's black
Bond is a system administrator at Vauxhall Cross. Women ignore him. He drives a Citroën C3.
Whats the plot of the movie?