This shit is fricking KINO why the frick did nobody tell me before?

This shit is fricking KINO why the frick did nobody tell me before?

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  1. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    It falls off once tangerine dies.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      this. he was the only interesting presence. i don't remember a single line or moment aside from him. i heard the actor might be up for James Bond is it true?

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        yes

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      The Carver scene legit made me laugh out loud, maybe you are just gay for Kick Ass.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >dies
      You mean the last ten minutes of the movie?

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        It does in fact fall apart in the last ten minutes. The trainwreck was a complete trainwreck.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          This is what I meant in my original post. It's not bad because he dies, it's just that the ending is a total fricking indulgent mess that makes his death feel like it doesn't matter at all. He could've resurrected and quipped at the end and it wouldn't have been that jarring.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            The fact that the other, annoying brother lives and the coolest character of the movie that's on every poster next to Brad Pitt dies in such a shit manner was abhorrent.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          The heavy CGI near the end was awful. Not that there wasn't CGI in the rest of the movie but it was particularly bad near the end.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            bump

  2. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    People on here think it is Reddit The Movie. Maybe it is, but i also like it. Lots of very funny scenes. Kinda like Scott Pilgrim

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Surprise kino.

      Not bad at all for a modern action flick. I enjoyed it.

      zoomer brainrot
      movie wanted to be a tarantino flick except it wasn't funny or clever
      my theater was completely silent the entire runtime besides the stupid Channing Tatum cameo

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Oh since noone else laughed, i might as well not like it

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          nowhere in my post did i imply that the rest of the theater influenced my reaction. i laughed my ass off at Banshees of Inisherin while the rest of my theater was quiet, but Bullet Train was just one try-hard cringe gag after another. le thomas le tank engine. have a nice day if that's what you consider funny. you're reddit.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            I feel like killing myself over liking something that other people don't like would be kind of an overreaction. I'll check out that BoI movie tho, it sounded like some boring ass anime, but it looks like it might be good.

            • 2 months ago
              Anonymous

              Maybe I was a bit harsh. No need to have a nice day yet, especially if you aren't familiar with Martin McDonagh's filmography.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            >t. Diesel

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        It was a Guy Ritchie knockoff not a Tarantino you moron

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Name a single laugh out loud moment from a Tarantino movie. Choose carefully. Your self-esteem is on the line.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          The Sicilians scene from True Romance.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            That's not a Tarantino movie. He didn't direct it. The scene isn't even funny.

            when brad pitts trying to go full undercover wop in inglorious

            Amusing, but I wouldn't call it laugh out loud funny.

            • 2 months ago
              Anonymous

              post something that you find funny so i can a gauge on your sense of humour from anything

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                This

                https://i.imgur.com/vKKNrWK.jpg

                This shit is fricking KINO why the frick did nobody tell me before?

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          when brad pitts trying to go full undercover wop in inglorious

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            Bonjourno

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >my theater was completely silent the entire runtime
        That's how a theater should be

  3. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Reddit the movie

  4. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Surprise kino.

  5. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    There were plenty of threads about it. But these days if you post about something that is both popular and new on Cinemaphile you are branded a shill.

  6. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    CGI NETFLIX slow is hardly kino. There's not even a single babe.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >There's not even a single babe.
      Zazie

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Joey is cute.

  7. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Not bad at all for a modern action flick. I enjoyed it.

  8. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I was really expecting the White Death to be somebody cool like Dolph Lundgren

  9. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Watched it last night, it was fun

  10. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    it's easy to entertain children with adults in animal costumes, it doesn't have to be good, just for the kid to think "this is fun" for the duration of the spectacle. this movie was like that but for adults, the designs are cool, the characters are quirky, and it is entertaining for the duration of the movie, but it is ultimately a shallow expirience that you forget the next day

  11. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    good turn your brain off fun

  12. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    it was crap. it tries so hard to be stylized that it just comes off as trite. its like the director watched a bunch of tarantino, guy ritchie and edgar wright movies and tried to mash them all together that it became tiring after ten minutes

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      I remember people saying this about those first Tarantino flicks. Other directors and movie references, but same arguments.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Difference is, QT's jokes and violet set pieces actually make you laugh out loud. Thomas the Tank Engine and fake stunt David Leitch play fighting are just lame and gay.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          It was a Guy Ritchie knockoff not a Tarantino you moron

          And guy ritchie is a tarantino imitation.

          John Wick has done damage to action movies.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            >tfw i just know the new Bond will just be John Wick in a tuxedo
            it's so over

            • 2 months ago
              Anonymous

              >the new Bond will just be John Wick in a tuxedo
              LOOKS LIKE KINO IS BACK ON THE MENU, BOYS

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                It won't be John Wick 1 but John Wick 4 complete with Reddit quips and DEI side characters.

            • 2 months ago
              Anonymous

              >tfw I just know the new Bond will just be John Wick in a tuxedo
              We're so back

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            its better than the quick cut, shakey cam action of the 00s by a mile

  13. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Smokin’ Aces for homies who have no idea what “cool” is

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      smokin' aces is pure 2000s SOVL.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >cinnamon roll?
        >roll de cinnamon?
        NO
        IT LOOKS LIKE EASTERN
        EUROPEAN
        JIZZ

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          I'm watching it tonight. It really was too ambitious for it's time. People say the movie is a tonal mess but that was the point. The movie shifted entire aesthetic styles for each character, going from quirky comedy to high octane action to powerful drama. It's a truly ballsy movie and I still think it's a gem.

  14. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    It's okay but it has basically no re-watch value

  15. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    It's only purpose is for Kick-Ass to make a Layer Cake style audition tape to get the Bond gig.

  16. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    The young looking girl looks like Mr Bean.

  17. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    >dirty smelly Brad Pitt
    >charisma blackhole Aaron Tyler Johnson
    >old hag Joey King
    >drunk Michael Shannon
    >walled Sandra Bullock

    should have called this Trainwreck

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      blackhole Aaron Tyler Johnson
      well, can't be any worse than Daniel Craig and he was the defintition of charisma blackhole.

  18. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I like when you saw Zazie Beetz's yummy chocolate mommy legs AWOOOOGA

  19. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Yeah
    I saw it last year

    It was great. While I was watxhing this I realized that it was first timecwhen I chuckled on hollywood comedy since Tropic Thunder in 2008

  20. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    The guy with the mustache should've been the main character and not have died like a b***h.

  21. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    >why the frick did nobody tell me before
    it's unimportant and you will forget about it
    now watch harakiri (seppuku)
    https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0056058/
    it will stay in your mind

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      That's not an action comedy

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        yep, it's not deadpool (literally and figuratively)

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          It's lesser for it

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          >yep, it's not deadpool (literally and figuratively)

          although he does cameo

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >1962
      Pass

  22. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    KINO

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >watch movie
      >think this guy is kino as frick
      >learn that he was kickass
      >learn that he was quicksilver in that one avengers movie
      >learn he was the main character in godzilla
      >learn that he was the hillbilly in Nocturnal Animals
      >learn that he's now being looked at for James Bond
      what a bizarre career, gary oldman tier shapeshifter.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Check out his wife if you want to see bizarre

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          just did. what the frick is up with that? is he fricking her to get roles? he has her name tatooed in his chest. is this a ------ ritual?

  23. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    It had a chance to frick up royally in one spot that would have retroactively ruined the whole film but didn't. Glad people ritual post about it because that's the only reason i watched.

  24. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    It was fun. Brothers were definitely the best part.

  25. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I've made multiple threads about this movie

    Its an enjoyable one

  26. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I'd buy her water, if you know what I mean-

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      What do you mean????

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        ehehe, let's just say I would let her push my cart anytime she wanted *wink* *wink*

        why was she advertised so much when she was a cameo character and even that is stretching it.

        probably because of The Boys hype

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          >I would let her push my cart anytime she wanted *wink* *wink*
          Please elaborate I don't understand

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            I'd repeatedly insert my penis in her vegana, if you catch my drift

            • 2 months ago
              Anonymous

              >I'd repeatedly insert my penis in her vegana, if you catch my drift
              Why the frick would you do that? Are you gay?

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                yes

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      why was she advertised so much when she was a cameo character and even that is stretching it.

  27. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    This board doesn't like any movie that's intended to be fun

  28. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    subsequent watching proves it as a pretty decent 6.5 or 7/10 action movie. But on first watch this movie is so good, going in expecting shit and getting kino is nice. Any other flicks with this feel?

  29. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    >I NEEDO HERO

  30. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I rate it highly on the basis that it was a pure fun, fantastical and irreverent blockbuster that's not capeshit that we do not see much if at all these days.,

  31. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    fun movie and my dad enjoyed it which is probably the highest seal of approval possible. he never enjoys or smiles at anything that isn't made before 1999.

  32. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    OH NONONONONO...
    AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

  33. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    It is a fun movie

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Fun is just a buzzword when you can't actually think of any real reasons as to why the movie is good, don't use it.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        that's your opinion, but since you're an incel/robot, it's meaningless. Nobody has to ustify why they lie something, if you don't get it that's just your own problem as a defective human being.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          you’re wasting your time and energy on a edgy reddit refugee, man. this movie was fun as frick, and only a pretentious bellend like the one you replied to would say otherwise.

  34. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    This movie and its AI generated script and soulless directing are pure slop

  35. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    This movie is good. I almost typed great but maybe that's where we get to the Tarantino films. So yeah this movie felt like that but a small step down. Now by itself you could talk a little more highly. I like the characters and wanted to see more, the brothers crack me up. The clashing plans keeps you interested. It's very stylish. I've watched a lot of movies the past few years and this is absolutely in the top quarter of them. But that's my taste (I think I'm getting an interest in movies that take place on trains). I was surprised to watch a movie that's pretty new and love it, I actually came in thinking it'd be so-so. Just googling for a picture the history had 'bullet train sequel' so yeah I liked it enough to look. Also I remember enjoying the credits for those that appreciate that kind of thing. So as a whole presentation, better than most of what's out there.

  36. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Overall decent dumb action movie but they completely wasted Michael Shannon

  37. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Kino until the end (last 30-40 minutes or so) where it went full live action anime

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      And Truck-kun came through and stopped it from being the ruined.

  38. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Teevee aka reddit central hated it so I knew it would be kino

  39. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    This movie sucked and is the most Reddit movie made in the last 5 years. It’s what Ozark is to Breaking Bad in terms of being a Tarantino knock off

    Let me guess, you thought the forced Thomas the Tank Engine references were actually funny, Brad ‘would’ve been a cool character if this was 2004 but now just forgettable derivative trash’ Pitt was cool, and the twist with the cute little girl being the big scary bad guy was actually surprising

    This movie is pure shit , and only succeeds at being a filter to identify onions brained mouth breathing idiots. Sorry OP, but that apparently includes you

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